Reminiscent

Laxus had taken to sleeping facing away from her recently. Not that Mirajane took it personally. He wouldn't admit it, but she knew that after his last job he'd hurt the ribs on his other side and couldn't stand laying on them for very long.

It gave her the chance, anyhow, to cuddle up against his back. Mira found that she rather liked that, honestly, for some reason. Not that they'd never done it before. It was just that it became their new norm.

That was how she was sleeping that night when it happened, all curled up against him, one arm thrown gently around his middle, hugging him when she felt the need.

"Why were you crying yesterday?"

"Hmmm?"

"Why," he repeated slowly, staring off into the darkness, "were you crying yesterday?"

Mira just snuggled closer to his back. "When?"

"Do you cry that much, demon?" Laxus asked. "That you don't know when I'm talking about? Or are you just trying to avoid the question?"

Shifting slightly, she ran the hand laid across him up so that she could stroke his chest. "Dragon?"

"I just want to know."

"It's late. Shhh. Go to-"

"You didn't know that I was up," he told her softly. "Yesterday. I had got home from training and you thought that I was asleep. But I heard you. It woke me up, hearing you…sob like that. But I just couldn't… I don't do tears well." It was his turn to shift then, uncomfortable even with the memory. "And you stopped so soon and I knew that you didn't want me to notice, so I just laid back down and eventually you came to wake me up for dinner. I-"

"You shouldn't spy on people," she breathed softly against his back. "Dragon."

"What was wrong?"

She nuzzled against his back. "Nothing."

"Mirajane-"

"It was nothing. You know me. I cry over silly things."

"You do," he agreed, holding back a yawn. "A lot."

"So-"

"But not like that. I could tell. You were hurting."

"Lax-"

"You always tell me that we need to be honest with one another," he pointed out. "So what-"

"I was just…thinking about my mother. That's all."

He blinked. Then he shut his eyes. "Oh. Sorry. I didn't…I thought that someone had done something to you or something."

She kissed his back that time. "What would you have done if they had?"

"Killed them."

"Laxus."

He patted the arm she had wrapped around him. "You're my demon. Those are the consequences. People should be aware. If I have to make a few examples to get the news out, so be it. I kill those who make you cry."

"What if you make me cry?"

"Let's just never try to get into that predicament, huh?"

That fell between them for some time. Mira was nearly back to sleep when, softly, Laxus whispered, "Wanna talk about it?"

"Hmmm?"

"Talk about it," he repeated.

"Wha'?" she yawned. "Dragon?"

"You know." He was stroking her arm then. "Why thinking about…made you cry."

"Oh." She didn't even open her eyes. "No."

Again, he got quiet for a second before saying, "Did you…I mean…"

"Lax, let's just-"

"You had pretty good parents, right? I mean, we've never really talked about it. They're dead, huh?"

"Yes, Laxus." She removed her arm from around him then before rolling onto her back. "Of course they are."

"Well, I know, I was just-"

"Well, just don't, huh?"

He had a sharp intake of breath too when he moved to turn as well. His side was still in so much pain though that he just moved to lay on his stomach, head tilted towards her.

"You need to see a doctor."

"I ain't a whiner."

"Laxus-"

"What's goin' on with you, demon? Huh?" He was staring at her then and, well, she had no choice but to glance at him. "You normally like talking about yourself. And especially about personal things."

"There's nothing to talk about."

"I just didn't like hearing you cry."

"And you're bringing it up now because-"

"Because it's been bothering me, demon." He let out a slight breath. "I just love you, woman."

Usually, that made her coo, but at the moment, it only drew forth her own sigh.

"It was Lisanna," she told him softly then. "We were talking up at the guildhall and she asked me something and… She just doesn't remember a lot. Or she doesn't pretend to. I think sometimes she just likes asking me things so that I can tell her about how things were."

"If it makes you cry though," he started, "why don't you tell her to knock it off? I mean, you don't like to think about it, clearly, so-"

"No, dragon," she told him. "I don't dislike it. I love it."

"You cried because you loved it?"

"I cried because it got me thinking of the past and it just worked up a lot of feelings through the day. That's all."

"Then you don't like it," he reasoned. "And she shouldn't do it."

"No, Lax, I do, but-"

"Crying and being sad clearly shows that you don't like it."

"That's not true. I love thinking about them." Glancing over at him, she asked, "Don't you ever think about yours? Your mother, I mean?"

Shutting his eyes, Laxus said, "No."

"Laxus-"

"She left me," he told her simply. "That means she doesn't get the honor of crossing my mind. Not at all."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"I asked about yours." He let out a slow breath. "We're even."

Smiling then, she shut her own eyes. "I love to remember every single detail I can. From the tiny house we lived in to the way my father would say my name. He had this really thick accent. Mira. You should have heard the way he'd call me. When he'd call me that, I mean."

"What else would he call you?"

She giggled then as it was her that turned onto her side, opening her blue eyes to stare at her restless dragon.

"Janie," she sang softly, making him peek his own eyes open to glance at her. "It's cute, huh? Whenever I was upset, he used to call me that and tell me how good he needed me to be. Janie. Be good. I was the big sister. And big sisters couldn't argue. Janie."

Reaching a hand out, he gently placed it on her cheek, stroking softly. "You loved your parents."

"I love them," she corrected. "Always."

"I'm sorry."

"Why, dragon?" Mirajane smiled at him then. "I'm sorrier for you than me."

"What are you talking about?"

"I had my parents," she told him. "And they loved me. Until the day they died. That's more than either of yours ever gave to you. And no matter how great he is, Makarov can't fill that."

For a moment, he just laid there before going back to caressing her cheek, the calloused pad of his thumb rough against her soft white flesh.

"I didn't need them."

"Everyone needs their parents, Lax," she told him. "You just adapted without them. That's all."

"You know," he said slowly after giving that a few minutes to sink in, "if you really do like to think about 'em or whatever, you don't have to wait for Lisanna to reminisce. I…I wouldn't mind listening to…"

"Dragon-"

"I'm serious." Again, his thumb stilled as he stared at her. "And don't ever feel like you can't cry in front of me. I-"

"Laxus, you hate crying. You-"

"No," he said with a frown. "I just don't know how to deal with it. It makes me uncomfortable and-"

"Which means that you hate it."

"Which means," he amended, "that for most people, I'd rather not be around when it happens. But you're my demon. And I can be uncomfortable for you. I wanna be. I want you to know that you can be real with me, Mira. If you're feeling sad and need me, that's fine. You don't have to hide from me. I love you."

"I love you too."

"Then don't shut me out." Then, with a grin, he said, "Janie."

"Shut up, Laxus." But she was giggling as she shoved his hand off. He only moved it to gently tug at her downed bangs before dropping it to the mattress between them. "You need to sleep anyways. You-"

"No."

"No?"

Shaking his head, he said, "After all this, I deserve at least one story, huh? Something more than just that nickname stuff. Come on, demon. Give me somethin'."

Mira's eyes searched his then, as if to track down any disinterest or teasing in them, but, of course, she found none and, after another moment of thought, she spoke.

"You know how Lisanna loves animals? I mean, she honestly loves them with all her heart," Mirajane said to which he nodded slightly. "It was even worse when we were growing up. She was probably three or so and we lived in this tiny, one room house at the edge of town. It was so small. My parents had a cot on one side and me, Elf, and Lisanna all slept together in another on the other side of the room, over near the fireplace. You know, so we could keep warm during the winter?

"Well, anyways, there just wasn't any room for us all. I don't know what we'd have done if…if they'd lived and we all just kept living there. But you know when you're a kid, you don't notice things like that. Especially not the baby. And we all treated Lisanna like a baby. Constantly. And if she wanted something, we all tried to get it for her."

Mirajane was giggling then, but it wasn't her usual, upbeat one and Laxus only laid there, listening solemnly.

"So Papa always let her-"

"I didn't know that was what you called your father." Laxus didn't mean to, but he found himself saying that then. "I just always assumed you called him Father or Dad or-"

"No," she told him, shaking her head slightly. "He was my papa."

Laxus smiled slightly. "That's cute."

"Dragon-"

"It is," he told her. "But continue."

"I was just saying that Papa always let her keep anything she brought home," she told him then.

"Anything?"

"Like…gosh, Lax, we had to have had five frogs, a toad, four kittens, a dog or two-"

"You guys lived in a zoo!"

With a grin, she said, "And Lisanna used to cry so much in the winter when the snow would pile up, that her babies would freeze out there and that if we didn't let her bring them in, she'd just go sleep out there too. And Mama used to complain so much, but Papa would bring all of them in. All of them."

"In that tiny space?"

Nodding, Mirajane told him, "You think sharing a bed with Elf and Lisanna is bad, imagine doing it with dogs and cats and everything else as well. Oh and the rabbits. I can't even tell you how many we'd have at any given time. Papa finally built her a little bunny hut on the property. And if you saw how many dog houses we had all around, you'd flip. It was crazy.

"But he loved his baby. He used to carry her around with him everywhere. She'd ride on his shoulders or in his arms and he'd kiss her head or agree with her when she said that we were being too mean. Lisanna didn't do chores, she didn't help clean up even after her animals if she didn't want to. Because she was the baby. Always."

It wasn't hard or even very much, but a few tears did fall down her face then and, instead of freaking out or drawing attention to it, Laxus just looked forwards then, at the headboard, before softly speaking.

"I remember her smell."

"W-What?" Mira sniffled, glancing at him. "What are you-"

"I know it doesn't make sense. And you don't have to believe me. I don't even know if I really do or not," he admitted softly. "But sometimes, when I'm in the market or out around a bunch of people, I catch a whiff of some woman's perfume or something and I just… I get these flashes of being a little kid and this woman that I know can't be real. It's just my mind playing tricks on me. Inserting the few photographs I've seen of her with some bullshit wish or… But I smell that and I just think of these sheets. These nice, clean sheets and she's making the bed and she's complaining at me, because I keep messing them up? But I'm just a little boy and she's giggling about it and I'm giggling as she falls into the bed with me too, wrapped up in those sheets and when she snuggles me, I can smell it. Smell her. Smell…my mother."

He laughed then, but it was dark and took Mira aback.

"But I don't want to remember her anyhow," he growled then, his canines flashing in the darkness as he widened his malicious grin. "She didn't want me. I don't want her. She left me. With Ivan. She knew, she fucking knew, that he was insane, that there was something wrong with him, so she got the hell out of there. But she left me there. All alone. And never came back for me. Never sent me a letter or tried to get in contact with me or… I don't care. I don't. It's stupid. She's stupid. She's just a fucking idiot, is what she is. Because I'm the most amazing mage ever. She missed out. Her and Ivan. Both. Those fucking idiots. Those two fucking…fucking…I just…"

"It's okay, Laxus. You don't have to-"

"It's not okay." He shut his eyes tight then, pulling away when she tried to lay a hand on his arm. "It's not okay to do that to someone. To someone you're supposed to care about. To just leave me and not care. I wasn't that bad, was i? That she couldn't even take me with her? Or come back for me? She never even checked in on me. Who does that? People treat fucking dogs better than that. She raised me for three years and then just… Don't, Mira."

She couldn't help it though. That time, her tears were more prevalent as she tried to wipe at them discreetly.

"I can't help it, Laxus. I'm sorry."

"Stop saying that."

"I am."

"There's nothing to be sorry about." He kept his eyes closed as he heard her sniffle some more. "I'm way better off without a bitch like that in my life. Ivan too. Gramps was the only person I had and he's all I needed. The only good thing she ever did was leave me the hell alone and the only thing he did right was put this lacrima in me. For the wrong reasons, fine, but it turned out for the better. I'm fine. I'm well-adjusted. I'm perfect. It's them that's fucked. Not me. I have a life, I have friends, I have a woman. I'm fine. I'm fucking fine."

That time he could only flinch as Mirajane moved to gently lay a hand against his arm. Stroking it, she leaned over him and brushed a kiss against his golden locks.

"You are," she agreed. "You more than fine, Lax. And that's her loss. And Ivan's. No one else's."

"Damn right. I'm the strongest mage to ever live, I got a nice place, I got friends that would fucking die for me, I have Fairy Tail, and I have you. I have the only woman that matters in my bed, every night, looking out for me. I don't need her. I never did."

"That's right. You- Laxus."

He only pushed up though before moving to gently shove her back down. When she was on her back once more, he just laid his head down against her breasts, shutting his eyes.

"I don't," he whispered against the fabric of the shirt of his that she always wore to bed, "want to think about it anymore."

Slowly, Mira moved to rest one hand against the back of his head, tenderly running her fingers through his hair.

"Okay," she whispered. "Okay, dragon."

"I want…"

"What? Tell me."

Sniffling himself then though he'd have blamed it on allergies if she asked, he whispered, "I wanna hear more about your parents. Your…papa."

Mirajane leaned her head down then, getting a whiff of him before shutting her eyes as he took his own of her, finding it far more appealing than the one he was speak of before.

And, with a grin, Mirajane said, "I can do that for you, Lax. I can do anything for you."

Not exactly the Bickslow and Lisanna one-shot I promised, but I sorta hit a snag in that and wrote this instead. It happens. Probably gonna start back on A Dragon's Love now and finish it up before it drifts too far from my thoughts.