JJ and Emily centric multi-chapter fic that will probably be somewhere around four or five chapters, but I'm not entirely sure at the moment. This definitely wont be turned into a lengthy story though; it's just an idea I've had floating around in my head for a little while on a lighthearted and drama free story.
Hope you all enjoy!
The BAU floor was eerily quiet as JJ made her way out of her office and down the stairs towards the rest of the profilers. Except, as she approached the desks, she realized that the chairs were empty and the area was deserted.
"Guys?" She questioned into the empty space, wondering if she was the subject of a prank, knowing there was always at least one profiler around working on case files. "Seriously? Where the heck is everyone?" She asked to the empty room, half expecting an answer but not at all surprised to be met with silence.
"Are you kidding me?" An extremely familiar voice echoed through the hallway, followed by a snort of incredulity that was somehow undignified and elegant all at the same time. A floating voice that she recognized immediately as Emily Prentiss's.
Following the sound of the now audible but muffled voices, the blonde meandered through the open area and towards Penelope Garcia's lair. The moment she stepped through the doorway, she caught sight of two of the missing profilers, guessing that Reid was probably off somewhere getting lunch or otherwise preoccupied.
"You cannot be serious," Emily huffed, her arms crossed over her chest as she glared at Derek Morgan, his minor flinch the only indicator that Emily's patented glare was getting to him.
"I'm not saying I'm not open to the suggestion," Derek said smoothly, sidling up to the raven haired profiler and wrapping his arm around her shoulders, his flirtatious smile firmly in place. "I'm just saying me and Baby Girl here have more chemistry."
Rolling her eyes in an exaggerated fashion, Emily plucked his arm off her shoulders with disgust before taking a step away from him and pointing an accusing finger at Garcia. "You're only saying that because she hands out compliments on your physique like they're free samples."
Morgan's response was to simply shrug and flex, causing the tech analyst to fake swoon before using her hand to fan herself. "Em, a Chocolate God with that type of body deserves praise," Garcia said pointedly, her free hand waving towards Derek's still poised and flexed body; a feral grin spreading across her face as she blatantly stared at his newly revealed abdominal muscles. "Case in point."
JJ, still lost as to what the fuss was about, stood in the doorway as confused as ever.
"You know what?" Emily asked in a huff, her hands flying to her hips as she studied the pair with a newfound scrutiny, "You're absolutely right. I don't think I could even attempt to reign in the womanizer in him. Honestly, you're just crazy enough to manage it, Pen."
Having had enough of being left out of the loop, JJ finally decided to make her presence known. "Okay, what in the world are you guys talking about?" Her face was scrunched up in confusion as she glanced from person to person.
"Nothing," Derek said quickly, his gaze darting from woman to woman before taking a step closer to Penelope. "Just a friendly argument."
JJ quirked an eyebrow and stepped further into the room, closing the door behind her as she did so. "Didn't sound like nothing."
"You know, you and JJ would probably work better," the tech analyst said to Emily, appraising the two carefully before nodding, seemingly to herself. "Though you two are nowhere even close to as compatible as us," her hand waved between herself and Morgan.
Finally catching on to what was being discussed, JJ could only stare at the three other people in the room, wondering how in the world they had even gotten started on such a ridiculous conversation.
"Seriously? This is what you guys are arguing over? Who makes the better couple?" The blonde couldn't keep the shock off her face even if she tried, finding the whole thing to be ludicrous.
Ignoring JJ's outburst, Emily stepped over to JJ's side and motioned between the two of them with her index finger, "We are definitely better suited than you and Morgan. What you two have is superficial at best, we have personal knowledge and friendship making us more compatible and better suited to last long term." The smug look on her face did not go unnoticed by anyone in the room, though JJ's shock at the argument by the profiler was much more noticeable than anyone else's.
"Uh, are you really going to argue this Emily? Doesn't this seem a little—" the blonde's hand waffled in the air as she tried to come up with an apt word, "childish?"
Emily, befuddled as to why JJ wasn't as invested in winning this argument, stared in shock and mild disappointment. "There is nothing childish about losing an argument Jennifer," she said with the utmost seriousness.
"Prentiss, c'mon, let's not kid ourselves. You and JJ would suck as a couple, just look at you two right now. I'm almost disappointed in Baby Girl for suggesting it in the first place," Derek said breezily, giving an admonishing look to the tech analyst before returning his attention to the media liaison and his fellow profiler. "Look, there's plenty of me to go around, so you and Baby Girl can just share me." His smug and cocky grin was enough to silence Emily, her brain unable to get past the showcasing of his enormous and overinflated ego.
Offended at the easy brush off, JJ crossed her arms and attempted to glare at the burly profiler. "There is no way that you are better than me, Derek."
It was Emily's turn to stare incredulously at the blonde, her mouth agape at the complete and instantaneous 180 in attitude on the argument. "Are you serious?" She asked JJ, her eyes practically popping out of her head. "That's what gets you to change your opinion on things? What happened to this being childish?"
JJ simply shrugged at the woman next to her, the corner of her lip pulling up in a smirk, "I'm not just going to stand here and let Morgan claim he's better than me."
Penelope, who had been watching the whole conversation suddenly smiled wickedly, her thoughts running rampant with devilish and impish intent. "Okay," the tech analyst shouted, immediately silencing the ongoing debate between Morgan and JJ. "Let's put this to the test."
All three of the others in the room stared at her with questioning gazes, unsure of what that entailed and slightly afraid of what the crazy blonde would suggest.
"How exactly are we going to do that?" Emily chanced asking, already aware that whatever Penelope's suggestion was going to be, it wouldn't be anything good. They rarely ever were, she was far too calculating for that.
"Well, what better way to test out who the better couples are than to actually pair off?" Garcia smiled innocently, her eyes glinting with the familiar mischief that accompanied trouble.
"Pair off?" Morgan asked, not quite grasping what Garcia was suggesting.
Emily sighed, mentally congratulating herself on guessing the strangeness of the proposition; not yet aware of what the tech analyst would be getting out of the arrangement. There was no way Garcia would suggest something like this without somehow getting something out of it; though Emily supposed that getting to fondle and openly manhandle Morgan, not to mention date him, was reason enough for Penelope. Although, Penelope did most of that already, so again, it didn't really add up.
"She means that you and her date while Jen and I date and then we see who works better or lasts longer." The raven haired woman then turned towards the tech analyst, "Right?"
Penelope nodded enthusiastically, "Correct, my brilliant and beautiful profiler."
"You can't be serious," JJ finally added, her brow furrowed as she tried to figure out how this suggestion made any sort of sense.
"I have never been more serious in my life," Garcia said, the seriousness of the statement less effective when she was smiling like a loon. "You claim you're a better match for Emily than my Chocolate Adonis here, and we're sure that we make a better couple that you two, so it only makes sense to put it to the test."
Still not bending to the stretched logic Garcia was attempting to sell, JJ continued to stare at the other woman in disbelief. "That makes absolutely no sense Pen. It sounds like you just want an excuse to date Derek."
Emily nodded in agreement, not seeing how this proposition would work let alone prove who the better couple was.
Garcia sighed, looking at the two women with a sympathetic gaze that seemed to suggest they were dense for not grasping the concept of what she was saying. "Sweetie, if I wanted to date Hotness here, I wouldn't need a bet to do it." She said plainly and with the utmost of confidence. "Secondly, what I'm suggesting is the only way to determine who the better couple is. If you don't want to do it because you're afraid Derek and I are more compatible, then just say so. We won't think any less of you for it." Penelope's tone was sickly sweet and falsely innocent as she goaded the prideful pair. Garcia was nothing if not a genius when it came to pushing the right buttons and manipulating things in her favor. This was a bet she was determined to set into action; whether she won or not was entirely up in the air, though she had a fairly good grasp on the odds.
"Afraid we'll lose?" JJ shouted, her eyes bulging at the blatant air of superiority and confidence. "Please, Emily and I have this in the bag."
Emily, while completely put off and indignant about the smug claim by Penelope, could clearly see the workings of a trap. The particulars of said trap weren't clear yet, but she could smell a set up from a mile away and at the moment, it reeked.
From the way Morgan was staring at JJ and Penelope, Emily surmised that he was arriving at the exact same conclusion. Though neither spoke up or interrupted the two blondes for fear of the wrath they would incur, they could smell the trouble that was brewing. It was no secret that when riled up, Garcia and JJ were deadly and always made sure that whoever pissed them off made sure to never make that mistake again. Which was why Morgan and Emily weren't foolish enough to get in the middle of the two, so they stood by their, apparently, soon-to-be future better halves and kept their mouths shut. Though they did occasionally glance at one another with sympathetic expressions that showed their unspoken solidarity on the situation.
Roughly fifteen minutes of detail hashing between JJ and Garcia later, the terms to the bet had been set.
"So, the bet will last for two weeks." JJ started off, repeating the agreed upon term to verify that it was accurate.
Garcia nodded, "And we have to spend those two weeks living with our partner."
JJ nodded but Emily and Morgan were both opening their mouths to question why that detail was necessary.
Before they could ask, Garcia and JJ both rolled their eyes, annoyed at the interruption and the failure to grasp the seemingly obviousness of the rule. "Two weeks is a short time and with the unpredictability of our jobs it just makes sense to maximize the amount of time we'll be together. Besides, it would be ridiculously easy to outlast the other couple if the time together was confined to just a few outings as a couple." Garcia said simply, her voice somewhat condescending as she explained the reasoning.
Both profilers nodded dumbly, not sure why the way Penelope explained it made them feel foolish for questioning its validity or reasoning.
"Second term, each couple must have at least two dates over the duration of the bet. Meals in the shared living space do not count as valid dates." JJ said simply, holding up her index and middle finger as she ticked off the contingencies for the second term.
Morgan and Prentiss didn't even bother questioning the rule, deciding to just listen and go with the flow. Both profilers had a feeling their role at the moment would be very similar to their roles in the bet-agreed relationships. Stand in silent support and maintain the 'yes dear' mentality.
"Third term, if one of us dates, kisses, or otherwise engages intimately or romantically with another person other than their partner for this bet, they automatically lose and the other couple is deemed the winner." Penelope said, looking pointedly at Derek before glancing—albeit less heatedly—at Emily.
"Hey" Morgan said indignantly, his response echoed by Emily.
"We resent that implication," Emily said for the two of them, her hardened gaze directed towards the tech analyst.
"Well…" Penelope trailed off, and both profilers could hear the non-verbalized 'I call 'em like I see 'em' that filled the silence trailing after the one word. The shoulder shrug JJ gave also confirmed Garcia's assessment of the two profilers.
"Whatever," Emily grumbled, her arms folded over her chest as she huffed in annoyance.
Morgan, for his part, glared at the two blondes before mirroring Emily's posture, though he couldn't deny that he was a bit of a flirt but he didn't need Garcia or JJ calling him out on it.
"Term three, if by the end of the two weeks, both couples are still together and faithful, we'll use Spencer and Rossi as judges to determine who behaves more like a couple than the other." JJ said, looking at Garcia to see if the term was correct and what they had agreed upon.
Garcia nodded, holding her hand out for JJ to shake, which the media liaison immediately grabbed and shook. "Deal," the two said in unison, a look of pure determination on their faces as they attempted to stare one another down.
"Don't we get a say in this?" Emily finally asked, half of her expecting Garcia to suddenly shout that it was all a joke and half of her realizing that JJ had just entered her into a bet that she hadn't exactly agreed to.
"No," Penelope and JJ once again said in unison.
"C'mon Emily, we have a date to plan. Plus, we need to figure out who's going to move into whose place." Jennifer said with an air of authority, already starting to walk out the door and expecting Emily to simply follow behind her.
Watching the interaction with amusement, Morgan made a whipping motion as he gave the sound effect of a whip cracking before a thought suddenly occurred to him."Wait!" he shouted, immediately halting JJ's steps.
"What?" The media liaison said in annoyance, her competitive side wanting to have the finer details hashed out with Emily so she could win and rub it in Penelope and Derek's face.
"I get that we have no real choice in this," Morgan said, gesturing between himself and the still frozen Emily, "but what exactly are we winning by sticking this out? I mean, sure, this will be fun and all, but a bet isn't a bet without stakes, right?" He looked at Emily to confirm his point and smiled broadly when she nodded and turned her attention towards the two blondes.
"Huh," Garcia said slowly, "I thought bragging rights would be enough." Though the sly glint in her eyes suggested otherwise.
The tech analyst glanced at the media liaison, who simply shrugged, having thought that bragging rights was plenty enough incentive to win.
"Well, how about dinner at an expensive and exclusive place for the winner?" JJ suggested, trying to think of something that wasn't too high stakes but was enough to rub in the faces of the losers.
Garcia's face scrunched up in thought before she shrugged and sat down in her chair, "Sounds good to me. I wouldn't mind a free meal and a hot date," she said, throwing an exaggerated wink towards Morgan.
Derek waggled his eyebrows at Penelope, blowing a kiss in her direction, "Me either."
Emily pretended to stick her finger in her mouth, miming a gag as she watched the pair. "Whatever," she mumbled, rolling her eyes and looking towards JJ.
"Alright, dinner it is." The blonde said before smiling widely at the other couple. "The bet officially starts tomorrow, so get everything sorted out today."
Emily could only shake her head in disbelief as she followed reluctantly behind the bossy blonde, wondering how the stupid argument with Morgan had started in the first place and definitely wondering how in the world she ended up in a bet where she was supposed to not only date but live with JJ for two weeks.
"Stop grumbling and get into the spirit of the bet," JJ said sternly, not even needing to look back at Emily's face to see the pensive and probably sourpuss look on her face.
"Yes, dear," Emily sullenly responded, a fake smile plastered on her face as she dutifully followed behind her girlfriend for the next two weeks.
Feel free to leave suggestions on possible date ideas for JJ and Emily because I'm not really sold on the idea of a dinner date as one of their required dates.
Again, thanks for reading and I hope you guys enjoyed the first chapter. :)