Hiruko And Seek
Oneshot
By: Rai-Child
Fandom: Naruto
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of the characters.
Summary: One Iwa nin, one puppet, and one very good reason not to mess with Uchiha Itachi… Slight SasoDei, ItaKisa.
Author's Note: Meh. 0.o; This one's a little messy… Not sure if I like it or not. SasoDei if you squint. ItaKisa if you don't. Okay, you might need to squint a hell of a lot for the SasoDei- my intention WAS to write it in, but... I'm hopeless. You have been warned! X3
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Compared to some of the more senior members, Deidara had not been a part of the Akatsuki for long.
Still, he was a fast learner. For example, he already had a mental list of 'dos' and 'don'ts' lined up for future reference, just in case he should slip up and forget who and where he was again for a moment.
...The Iwa-nin had a rather wicked sense of humour. One that tended to get away with him sometimes.
Back to the list. The first item, he felt, was the most fundamental, for it was the reason he was now being chased down a certain corridor by a certain red-eyed individual...
1. Stay away from Hoshigaki Kisame .
Indeed, hitting on the water-user had not been the most sensible of ideas, especially since the flare of extreme jealously had just happened to rise in a guy who had killed his entire-clan-minus-one single-handedly. Not that Deidara was in any way attracted to the shark-nin- he was blue for Kami's sake, but seeing his initial reaction had been rather amusing, to say the very least. And it had briefly satisfied his mischief-tooth.
A few of the Akatsuki nin had gathered in that particular room to play some sort of card game; gambling being a favourite past time amongst some of the members, adopted to fill in the gaps that came between sleeping, eating and traipsing through various countries searching for their targeted Bijuu. At this point, precious few had been found and extracted, leaving many of them with huge tasks they had yet to face. Rolling a few dice and ending up with other peoples' underwear seemed to be their only source of comfort.
Other than each other, Deidara had found out, taking a large swig of his sake and draping an arm around the taller man's shoulders. Kisame was completely off his face, most of them were, and the poor guy had no way of knowing that the contents of Deidara's dish was simply water. The artist knew what he was doing, and he had never been much for alcohol anyway. To help matters, the dish itself was coloured, so no one could have guessed that the liquid was clear.
No one except Uchiha Itachi.
He had sat there, looking like he might be thinking of roasting the blonde on a spit at that very moment, the Sharingan-wheels in his eyes spinning as he observed the other with an air of detached interest. He hadn't touched his own bottle or dish, content to sit and glare and imagine the clay-user's untimely death. No one had picked up on it. Not even Deidara himself- not until Itachi had jumped out of his seat to defend his significant-other.
This brought Deidara nicely onto rule number two. He considered this as he sped around another corner, very nearly slipping and crashing into the wall opposite...
2. Said nin's Samahada is not effective when it comes to self-defence...
That was another important one. Deidara's initial reaction the moment the table was upturned and a pair of hands were aiming for his neck was to run, right around the back of Kisame, who had at this point more or less passed out in his seat, and make a bolt for the door...
At first, all had been relatively well. The ridiculously-sized sword had been in easy reach, and really, what else was he supposed to do when Uchiha Itachi was coming at him with bloodlust in his-
Eyes, don't look him in the eye... For the love of Kami- don't. Look.
No, it wasn't until after Deidara had made a move towards the Uchiha that the spikes came shooting out of the handle, piercing sensitive palms and drawing a short scream from him. By now, all of the people at the table were shooting them both incredulous looks, all except Zetsu, who was not-so-subtly considering eating Kisame before he jerked out of his unconsciousness. Deidara had shoved the bandage-covered weapon into Itachi's hands, ducking underneath the arm that swung forward to grab him again and bolting away down the corridor.
Yes, it was these first two rules that had gotten him into trouble. There were many others, but none exactly applied at this point. Everything from...
3. Hidan is creepy- steer well clear.
To...
11. Sasori doesn't appreciate people blowing up his puppets. So don't.
Sasori. Akasuna no Sasori- the same Sasori who had bluntly refused to join the game the other members had decided to take up, dubbing it foolish and immature.
Ha... Deidara spared a thought for his teammate, smirking slightly to himself. Says the guy who has the body of a fourteen-year-old...
He took another corner... And another...
Where the hell am I supposed to go? He didn't really know his way around too well- having had little time to find his bearings before he was whisked away on some pointless 'reconnaissance' trip to observe the Ibiki's Jinchuuriki. Sasori had been completely firm on the subject. Deidara had rolled his eyes and complained for at least half of the duration of the trip.
Sasori...
He took the next left and descended the short flight of steps, now unable to hear Itachi's footsteps at his heels. The door was flung open, the bitter scent of the oil Sasori used for the joints of his puppets immediately making his eyes water. He blinked a couple of times, surprised to find that the Suna nin wasn't there.
Or so it seemed, at first glance.
The bulky shadow of Hiruko stood solitary over to one side. Deidara might have been tricked into thinking that it was unoccupied, but the heated caress of another's Chakra radiated out from inside. Deidara closed the door quietly, so as not to attract Itachi's attention, should the Uchiha be passing by at that moment.
"Sasori no Danna..." He hissed, inching forwards a few steps. There was a slight shuffle, sounding hollow in the silence of the room. "Sasori... I know you're in there, un." Silence. He was listening.
"Uh... I could do with some assistance, un-"
"What've you done this time?" It was the voice of Hiruko that spoke, but he knew Sasori was behind it. The puppet seemed to inherit the redhead's sharp, clipped tone underneath that low growl.
"Maa... Just some trouble with Itachi-san..."
"Stupid brat." Deidara brushed off the cutting comment easily.
"You can help me, ne, Danna?" There was a slight click and a hatch on Hiruko's back swung open, revealing a rather annoyed looking teen glaring at his younger partner with a distasteful look on his face. On the outside, Sasori only looked about fourteen, but no one ever dared to treat him as the child he appeared to be. He was still significantly older than Deidara and therefore demanded respect.
He seemed to be torn, pausing for a moment. A brief moment, mind. Any time not spent doing something productive was clearly being wasted, in his opinion.
Finally, the verdict came, the voice smooth this time, even.
"Get inside."
"Wuh?" It would have been enough even to surprise Leader-sama. Sasori being generous? Never! It was unthinkable! It took a few seconds for Deidara to register the fact that his jaw had dropped, before he shut his mouth with a snap of teeth and climbed to stand next to Sasori.
Had they been the same size, it might not have been such an issue. As it was, there was easily enough room for one and a half Sasoris inside, but he was smaller than the blonde. Immediately, Deidara's legs began to cramp painfully as the lid was closed and the latch clicked, unable to shift even the slightest amount without making physical contact with some sharp, wooden limb. Sasori was not comfortable to lie against in the slightest, despite the fact that the Jutsu he was using to turn his human form into one of his stupid puppets was still incomplete. He was... Cold. Deidara sighed. Wooden fingers drummed irritably on the empty shell wall of Hiruko, as they both waited for footsteps outside, anything to show that Itachi had come and gone.
Nothing.
Nothing but silence.
After a while, Deidara let out a brief sigh of relief.
"Man, that was close, eh Danna? Should be safe to get out now, un."
"Hmmm." Deidara jerked slightly, despite himself. The voice had changed. He turned, not quite knowing what to expect, visible eye widening as he saw who he was leaning against-
"S-Sasori no Danna?"
Hidan frowned at him.
Deidara lurched to his feet, or made a good attempt at it, anyway. He only succeeded in headbutting the roof of the puppet instead. A hand now gripped his arm, and the blonde braced himself for another long speech about some crazy religion the guy was hell-bent on forcing everyone into.
Convert or kill.
Neither sounded too great in Deidara's opinion.
Where- How-
Was this some kind of sick trick? It had been Sasori, he was sure of it. Right down to the scowl. Now, he found himself trapped in the capsule with only the mad, religious guy for company, scrabbling to get at the latch so he could get out of this horrible nightmare and-
And...
And the latch was missing.
Missing?
Gone.
Things were not looking good. Deidara did his best to twist around and confront his newfound roommate, 'Hiruko-mate', only to find that something was off.
Since when had his eyes been red...?
The horrible truth dawned. The penny dropped. Call it what you will, but it was at that moment that Deidara realised that the sudden change had all been Genjutsu-induced. How had Itachi done it? Kami knows. Deidara had taken precautions not to look into his eyes, for fear of the Sharingan.
It was probably with his butt or something stupid like that...
The white hair had darkened to pitch black, the form changed and altered until it fit the mould. The hand of Uchiha Itachi closed on his arm, and all he could do was scream...
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Endah. X3 Uh, just to clarify- I reckon if Itachi can perform Genjutsu using his finger, than using his butt shouldn't be too hard... 0.o;
Ally