I'm back! :) I know I haven't posted in roughly a year, and I'm sorry about that... I got sidetracked by life. I will try to finish my old stories and write some new ones. Please review! -lawandorderobsessed

Remember?

Remember how cold I was to you before? How I spoke to you in a condescending manner? How you tried to be friends with me as I shrugged away your friendly

approaches? Liv –I'm sorry for all those times I made you cry secretly at night. I didn't know at that time my romantic feelings towards another woman was okay. You must

forgive me. I was a lesbian who grew up in a conservative household. In high school, I feigned my love for all those boyfriends I had. I thought I felt something when I

made out with a football player, but when I kissed you, that's when I really felt love.

Remember that rape case that hit you especially hard? It hurt me too. It's funny. I think I may have been in a worse state than you, but you were the one who came

crying to me in my office. Apparently none of the guys at the precinct understood, not even Elliot. I was a woman –you were a woman –we needed each other, and badly.

I knew that day to drop my cool façade. As I wrapped my arms around you, I felt "right." This is the way it's supposed to be was what my heart told me, but my mind was

telling me fervently to think twice about my actions. But that day, my heart won over. I knew you felt the same way as I stroked your silky brown hair and whispered "It's

okay, it's alright, I love you." All of this… on the sandy colored couch in my office.

Remember those days we spend together? Oh Liv –I can't believe I was nervous around you. I never spoke much in our relationship's beginnings and you would always

ask if everything was alright. I wish I had spoken more. We would have lifted off the ground faster; had more time. Every little moment spent with you was worthwhile,

even toiling through our weekend errands. Everything worthwhile; because I was with you.

Remember moving into our new apartment? The smell of the fresh coat of paint? The coziness of the new carpeting in our bedroom? I knew from our first date that you

were the one I wanted to be with. My political career? My Juris Doctorate? I would given that all up in an instant so I could be with you forever –to share your bed and

cook our meals together –anything so long as I was with you. I feel like I was so greedy, Liv. I wanted every single second with you. I was jealous of all the attention

those criminals received when you were interrogating them. How ironic is it that now –I would kill just to see your face again?

Remember what I told you before I left, Olivia? Remember what I whispered into your ear that desolate night? Please Liv, find someone else. Find someone else to make

love and special moments with. You need someone else, you always will. Can't you see I'm doing this for you? I fought with Witness Protection. They told me how much

danger I was in… as if I cared. They told me everyone I loved would be in danger too. My heart was pounding so hard. I knew they were right. Do you think I would leave

you without good reason? Don't live in the past, my love. I hate to say it but whatever we had is over now. Oh God, Liv, I'm crying and sobbing right now. If you were

here,you'd wrap your arms around me and cradle me like a baby. But you aren't here, and that's the thing that tears me apart everyday.

My memory of you will always be a tender, shining bubble in my heart. It will forever ache whenever something gets too close to it. Occasionally, it will pop, causing me

pain and grief, but it will always remain there, tender and shining in my heart.