Did you ever want to know how to be your favorite fanfiction author? Look no more! Here is where you can find all the information to be just like them!
HOW TO BE: DIMPLED
Basically, you go back and forth bewteen fics and then don't update them for a long time. Leave everybody hanging and wait for more than three months before you update again, and make sure you say a super long apology even though they won't forgive you and you just take up space.
Also, make sure to always make Avaric an evil sleaze except for one fanfic where you felt kind of weird writing it. Make sure you always forget to return reviews and feel really bad about it, but sort of brush it off and watch Netflix instead.
Always interview fanfiction authors you have never heard of, but do it with gusto, because a million people will PM you asking for one. Make sure to write down all the names on your waiting list, because it will come in handy when you don't update for three more months.
Make sure to lose sleep over all the fanfics you haven't updated for two years. But then publish a brand new story that will add to the list of all the crap you haven't done.
Also, be sure to love every fanfiction author unconditionally, because sometimes internet friends are better than real friends, eh?