In the Darkness, I Found Love
The room was dark and she couldn't find a light switch. "Goddamn it! Why does she have to be so difficult about everything? It's like she's too good for modern technology!"
She felt her way across the dark room, going carefully, sliding her feet through the thick carpet to avoid to stepping on anything or hurting herself. It didn't work.
"Dammit!! Ow!" she cursed quietly holding her barked shin and trying not to hop around in the dark. She wobbled unsteadily, teetering on the brink of balance…and fell, right on top of something hard and metal and pointy. "Argh!"
Muttering drastic curses under her breathe she felt around and stood up. Again she tried to feel her way to any kind of light, any kind of illumination, be it lamp or firefly. Anything at all. It didn't work.
Again she tripped over something. Actually it felt like she was grabbed by the ankles and pulled over. "Please let this be soft. Please?" Her plea went unanswered. Sharp pointy things broke her fall, tearing little cuts in her dress and leaving oozing trails of bloods on her bare legs. "I thought I was supposed to be lucky!"
Her mutterings as she again got up became unfit for human ears. "I'll get you, witch! You'll pay for this," she muttered, dusting herself off in the dark and finding her cuts and bruises by touch. "Ow! Yes, you will pay and you'll pay good!"
"I hate her. I really do," she mumbled, stepping as carefully as she could. "If she ever shows up again after that beating we gave her and her stupid friends, I will personally see that she never ever moves again. And her precious room? Yeah, not gonna be here. First I'm gonna install some serious real lights. Then I'm gonna trash all her crap, just burn it and throw it into the bay. Then I'll- argh!" The words abruptly stopped as she fell again.
She braced herself for more sharp pointy landings, but instead of pain, she felt soft fluffiness.
"Wha-?" Her words were muffled in the softest material she had ever felt. It was like falling onto a pile of marshmallow, minus stickiness. She levered herself up and crawled forward. It was so squashy she just wanted to lie down and sleep in the softness. It had to be the bed. "Wow," she whispered, "I definitely like this." She kicked off her boots and crawled a little more.
"What was I looking for again?" She couldn't remember. Oh, yeah. The lights. But bed seemed so nice. Better than the lights. Sleep was good. Yes, she could find the lights in the morning. When there would be actual daylight. Yes…yes….
She fell asleep.
The world was blue. Everything was blue.
It was quiet and calm. No one yelled or screamed or tried to kill her. No one forced her to work with idiots. No one tried to tell her what to do. There was no one there except her. She liked that.
Or no. She wasn't the only one there. Some one else was behind her. She could feel whoever it was sneaking up. She tensed, waiting until the person was right behind her, and spun, lashing out. But there was no one there.
She whirled around, looking through the blue for someone, anyone. There was no one.
It was quiet.
She was alone.
No one was there.
Suddenly she felt the person again, off to her right, moving through blue fog. She turned slowly, only her eyes moving at first then the rest of her body following. There was no one there. The feeling of otherness was gone.
It was calm.
She was alone.
And suddenly she didn't want to be alone anymore. Alone was fine when you were alone but if there were other people lurking and you couldn't see them, well, that was a different kind of alone. And it was not the good kind. She wanted to leave.
But she didn't know how.
And she could feel the person again. Behind her. She dropped into a crouch and the feeling disappeared. No. It was in right front of her now. But somewhere hidden, behind the fog.
She was ready for it. All she need was a good look and she'd get it.
Then she could be alone again. The good kind of alone. The one where she was actually all by herself.
She could feel it getting closer. She could sense it. But she still couldn't see it.
Where was it? Why wouldn't it come out where she could see it?
"Coward!" she shouted. "You coward, come out and fight!"
She got no answer.
"Come on out! Unless you're afraid!"
She couldn't stand the waiting. She could sense the person and it was driving her crazy that she couldn't see them. She could feel but not see and the waiting was insane.
"Argh!" She lunged forward, towards where her senses told her the person was. The sense disappeared as soon as she move and she was alone in the fog again.
The swirling blue surrounded her. It billowed around her as she spun around trying to find the person. She had to bring the person down. Then she'd be alone. She needed to be alone. And to be alone she had to get rid of the person. She had to…
There was no one there.
It was quiet. It was calm. It was blue. She was alone. And tired. Tired of fighting. Tired of being alert and ready at all times. Tired of everything. Just tired. Bone tired.
All of a sudden, she couldn't even stand she was so tired. She slumped to the ground as blue swirled around her and she hung her head. She didn't want to fight anymore. She just wanted to be alone. Totally by herself. So she could rest. Alone.
She felt the person again. It was right behind her. She had to get rid of the person.
She struggled to her feet and stood, not at the ready, not alert, not wanting to fight. She held herself tiredly in the guard position as the person came up behind her.
She swung her fist, fully expecting the person to disappear as soon as she turned around.
There was someone there. A blue someone. A hazy indistinct someone. A someone she couldn't see clearly. But someone nonetheless. Someone who dodged her punch and rolled around to behind her.
She swung again. Was dodged again. Again and again she struck only to have the blue person dodge and roll behind her. Again and again. It seemed like hours passed. Swing and dodge. Swing and dodge. Everything was in slow motion. Everything was blue.
She kept expecting the person to disappear each time she swung her fist. But the person didn't. She was never alone.
And suddenly she couldn't bring herself to keep fighting.
She swung and just didn't bother to check her swing as she missed. She fell forward, onto hands and knees, and didn't get up.
She rocked back on her heels and hung her head.
She wasn't alone, even now, when she had given up. But then she really hadn't expected ever to be alone. And so she wasn't.
She could feel the person behind her, moving forward. It was right behind her, only an arm's length away.
"Please, just get it over with. I'm tired of fighting. Just do whatever and go away. I don't want to fight you anymore," she whispered. "Just…" She couldn't think of what. She didn't care what happened as long as she got to be alone to rest afterwards.
She felt the figure lean down toward her and yet couldn't be bothered to care or move. She waited for pain to come.
But it didn't.
Instead, warmth embraced her from behind. Blue arms surrounded her and held her gently and comfortingly. Vanilla and peppermint filled the blue air.
"I never wanted to fight you," a quiet voice spoke, syllables whispering into her ear, carried on a warm sweet breath next to her ear. "I am not an enemy. Can you believe me?"
She could believe her. The voice was so soft and inviting, like she'd always imagined home would really be like. It filled her with peace and calm as its owner gently tugged her across her lap and held her in a protective embrace.
"You don't have to worry any more," she whispered in her ear. "You don't have to fight. I'm here. You're home and you will be loved. You are loved." She was home.
She wasn't alone, but she was home and that was good.
The blue woman held her and that was good too.
The blue woman sang a sweet, sweet song, the notes drifting through the blue fog and the words caressing the girl in her arms. The words were love on peppermint vanilla wings.
She fell asleep in the woman's arms.
She woke up.
It was morning and light streamed in through cracks in heavy navy curtains.
For a second she didn't know where she was. Then she remembered and winced, trying not to move so she didn't hit any of her bruises and cuts. But she didn't have any. They were gone, without scabbing or scarring. Simply gone.
She couldn't understand it. She was healed.
She sat up carefully and looked around. There was a lamp next to the bed and she reached over to switch it on. She moved the covers so she could reach.
A delicate scent reached her nose. For a second she didn't recognize it, and then she did. She smiled and snuggled down into the warm embrace of her covers again without turning on the light.
Vanilla and peppermint.
"Maybe I won't trash everything after all," she murmured.
can you guess? hmmm? or did i make it too hard to understand? cookies for those who guess right!!! -dangling cybercookie- and i guess a gumpdrop for those who try...