Hello kiddies! 'Tis Ruby here! Miss Diamond is not in the mood to type... Or so she says! (wink) Anyway darlings! This is our crackish debut into joint writing. We write individually too (see our profile). Please read and review! NB: This chapter is mostly Disney but the magical world of Hogwarts is on it's way!
Flora, Fauna and Merryweather were flying about in frenzy. It was Aurora's turn to host the monthly Princess Sleepover and the three fairies had finished tidying the room and now were filling it with pillows, lollies, heaps of fabric (for dress making), sleeping bags and (surprisingly) a large pile of documents regarding the state of the Six Kingdoms. Aurora was down at the front gates of the palace ready to greet everyone. They better be early, she thought to herself, she had a distinct memory of when Snow White turned up over an hour late! And apparently all she did was forget! Quite unacceptable really… She spotted a small dot in the sky. Well, at least Jasmine would be there to keep her company!
"There's Aurora's palace!" Jasmine pointed out, Aladdin nodded steering the Magic Carpet towards it.
"Hey Jasmine," he began, "What do you actually do at these things anyway?"
"Oh, you know, nothing exciting," she said nonchalantly, "Diplomatic discussions, greeting delegations, planning functions…" She noticed the false look of attentiveness upon his face. She smiled slyly "…and have pillow fights…"
"What?" he exclaimed a little too eagerly.
"… In our underwear," she added matter-of-factly with an accentuated nod. Aladdin developed a distinctly glazed look on his face.
"Um… Jasmine… Can I –"
"No, you can't come."
"But, uh…um…don't you need a strong guy, like, uh, me! You know, to protect you and…the others?" He suggested with the hopeful look of a puppy.
Jasmine pulled at his cheeks like one would a child, "Nice twy widdle Awaddin," she cooed, "but I think the girls and I will be just fine! Besides, don't you have somewhere else to be?"
He sighed unhappily "You mean, with like Eric and Beast? I don't mind them, but all the Prince Charmings, all three of them…Well, they're self obsessed, stupid or ALL of the above!"
She laughed at his childish complaints and shook her head "Well, uh…."
He looked up at her with immense hope, as any male would have; given the chance to swap Prince Charmings for a…girly pillow fight.
"… Uh, no." Jasmine concluded bluntly, leaving Aladdin to sulk.
"Ah! Foul beast! I challenge ye to a duel for the hand of the fair maiden!" The adorable bunny at which Price Charming was shouting tilted its head to the side and blinked innocently. Snow White giggled and picked up the bundle of fluff.
"Now, now, Pumpkin Pie, you promise that you wouldn't threaten the cute animals anymore. Remember…" she said sweetly.
"Aw… But! The foul beast! It is quite vicious! With giant fangs and the… Massive claws! And the… And…CHARGE!!!" Which he did.
Into a tree.
"Dang nabbit!" he muttered as he attempted to pull his sword out of the massive oak.
"Now darling, don't curse in front of the children!" Snow White admonished, her eyes widening to the size of saucers. Princey, as he was more affectionately known, look positively terrified.
"Children!?! What children?" he exclaimed in horror.
"Why, the little birdies, of course!" she replied blithely as fluttering blue birds descended from the trees to land upon his shoulders.
"Argh! Get off!" he exclaimed, flapping his hands at the birds, "This is my favourite silk shirt!"
Snow White erupted into giggles, once again, and allowing the littlest bird to perch on her finger.
"Oh my! I am quite late!" she exclaimed suddenly, "We must away!"
"But of course my fair maiden! If you wished I would take you to the ends of the earth!" he said passionately, kissing her hand.
"No, no. The sleepover will do just fine," she said kindly.
"And now! I shall assist you fair lady in mounting… The steed!" He gesture grandly to the magnificent steed… Snow White gazed down at the steed. The cutest little chipmunk you ever did see!
"I think it's a little… small, dear…" she advised gently.
"Nonsense! He's perfectly capable! Why, he's seen me through thick and thin! Rain and Shine! Blizzards and…and…and…" he shuddered fearfully "the dark! You know? The dark is…so dark!"
Snow White stared at him blankly, before nodding with a sympathetic smile.
"Behold, the STEED!" he yelled, turning to where he believed his noble companion stood.
The chipmunk smiled and squealed, obviously happy to be deemed a steed. The little critter ran over to the prince, and began incessantly hugging his leg.
"AHHHH! Get it off! Get it off!" he yelped, his arms flailing wildly.
Snow White promptly ignored him, instead glancing around the clearing in hopes of spotting said "steed".
"Is that it, dear?" she asked, pointing to a mopey-looking little donkey, whose tail appeared to be pinned on.
"Good morning," he said gloomily, "If it is a good morning... Which I doubt..."
"Awww!" cooed Snow, "Can we keep him?" Princey took a deep breath to calm himself.
"No, no, my little Snowflake. The gardens are rather full at the moment... What with all the lovely giant trolls you insist on keeping there..."
"They're misunderstood I tell you!" Snow White shrieked imploringly.
"Oh, the happy couple," Eeyore mono-toned before wandering off into the forest.
"Aha! Here he is!" exclaimed Princey, gesturing with open arms towards the brilliant white stallion that had been standing in the middle of the clearing the entire time...
And with that, Princey helped the darling Snow White onto the valiant steed and they rode off into the sunset... Well, actually Aurora's palace... But you know what I mean!
Meanwhile, in the main court at Aurora's palace, a large fountain ceased to spurt water into the sky as it was blocked. The fountain began to rumble ominously before, POP! A slender red-headed woman popped out of the top! Well, half of her anyway. She appeared to be stuck.
"Oh! Freakin' fins!" Ariel burst in exasperation, trying to free her hips and tail by pushing her hands down on the stone spout. She harrumphed at her lack of success.
"Flora!" she yelled, hoping the fairy would hear her. Ariel was in luck, it seemed, as Flora soon appeared in a flutter of red.
"Ooo, you seem to have gotten yourself into a spot of bother, dear!"
"Huh! No shit..." Ariel mutter, voice basically inaudible.
"What was that, dear?"
"Oh, nothing, nothing..."
Flora shrugged and flicked her wand so the mermaid popped out of the fountain. She splashed down spectacularly into the bowl of the fountain and surfaced with the bulk of her hair curtaining her face.
"Gah," she gurgled. Flora gave another swish of her wand and Ariel disappeared in a swirl of light, reappearing with legs and her pink dress.
"Thanks Flora!" called Ariel, running off to meet Aurora and the others.
"Cinders," began Belle calmly, not looking up from her book, "I think you can stop dusting now. You've been at it for hours! The interior of the carriage is only four metres squared, at most."
"But, but... What about the dust beneath the dust!" Cinderella exclaimed, holding her pink feather duster aloft. Belle closed her book with an audible thwump. Incidentally, the title of the tome was "How to Grow Peruvian Roses in the Arctic Circle".
"Honey, this is the cleanest carriage in the history and pre-history of human kind! It does not need dusting!"
"I'm sorry Belle... But you know how I am with cleaning! I'm just a little... obsessive."
Belle snorted at this statement, but was lady-like about it. It is quite a skill to snort daintily. Cinders looked sulked and glanced out the window.
"Ooo! We're here!" she exclaimed.
The footman opened the door for the two princesses and Belle disembarked first, followed closely by Cinders.
"Drat!" the latter exclaimed, hopping on one foot as she had lost her left shoe. "That darn shoe will not stay on! I'm sooo gonna sue the glass factory."
"Come on!" Belle called, "They're all waiting!" The two hurried off.
"Two realms will collide, both of great magic, heroes and villains alike will unite and when school begins royalty shall be Sorted!.. And now, as I was saying, the shortage of hemlock tea is and greatly inhibiting my great clairvoyance!" Professor Trelawney finished haughtily.
Dumbledore smiled at her from behind steepled fingers. "Don't you worry about it Sybil, dear, it shall be arranged…I'll send up a bottle of whisky too, yes?"
The divination professor, stared off seemingly into space, except that it was really Dumbledore's left ear. "Oh yes…that would be brilliant, Albus, just…brilliant," she replied vaguely, tottering out of his office.
Dumbledore, the extraordinary phoenix, Fawkes, and said "Well! What do you think of that then Fawkesy?" The bird trilled intelligently. "Oh, yes. I do agree quite wholly, yes… Now! Where have those lemon drops got to…"
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