Title: A Distressing Damsel
Disclaimer: ..."Up yours" is what I say to any lawyer willing to prosecute me.
Rating: G ( K ) – For good 'ol work/parentsafe mischief n.n
Spoilers: Gohan is Saiyaman! Wait, you already knew that? Then I got nuthin'.

Summary: OneShot. Videl was alive – probably perfectly fine – and he had rescued his damsel in distress! It just didn't get any better...Pre-Buu, Slight GhVi.

I don't care what anybody says; I'd let a man with antennae and a cape rescue me any day.

Early for once, Gohan nervously dawdled outside the door to his home room, wondering whether or not he should just go back up to the roof for the remaining twenty-or-so minutes before the bell rang. She was sure to be inside and – thanks to her overly tenacious zeal about unmasking Saiyaman's true identity – Gohan wasn't sure he wanted to spend any more time around her than necessary.

She wasn't a bad person, or anything; quite the contrary, really. She fought crime, seemed to have unusually high moral standards for someone so young (or anybody, really) and had even deigned to share her lunch with him once. To a Saiyan, philanthropy with food was an earmark of someone worthy of respect and gratitude.

Still, she was far too curious for Gohan's liking. Well, perhaps the curiosity itself wasn't the problem, but rather the specific amount of it that she unfortunately focused on exposing his mild-mannered alter ego to the world. That he could do without.

She'd be much more tolerable if she would just lay off once in awhile. Smiling more often would also be a great help. Gohan had enjoyed the honor of seeing her smile just once and, ever since, had been wishing she would repeat it.

Alas...girls. The bane (and blessing) of every man ever born (even those without secrets to protect).

Gohan decided, finally, that going into the classroom was the best solution. He'd offer her a cheery "Good morning, Videl-san" and hope that his friendly attitude would deter her from interrogating, hypothesizing and glaring at him at least until he did something specific to make her suspicious. Was that so much to ask?

He entered the classroom, his heart feeling as if it were a drum being pounded for a beat, and allowed his eyes to rise up the rows of seats to where he (inexplicably) chose to sit every day.

No Videl. Huh, that was weird.

Erasa and Sharpener were in their places, as per usual, but the ominous presence of Saiyaman's greatest and most clever adversary was pointedly missing. As the teenaged demi-Saiyan sat down, he felt obligated to inquire, "Hey, where's Videl-san?"

Erasa, alerted to his presence once he'd announced himself, turned to him with a smile slathered in gloss. "'Morning, stud muffin," she greeted with a wink. Gohan felt himself blush a little, but managed to compose himself. "I'm not sure where Videl-chan is. She's, like, usually here way before now..."

Sharpener, clearly annoyed by Gohan's company, smirked in the demi-Saiyan prodigy's direction before saying, "Maybe she had a long night out, if you catch my drift. It's hard to wake up after so much...activity."

Though Gohan was hardly well-versed in the nature of the birds and bees, he could recognize a crude insinuation when he heard one (his mother had allowed Muten Roshi to babysit once and, suffice to say, that was the last time ever). And that, if he wasn't mistken, was some sort of jibe about Videl being promiscuous to the point of exhaustion. Whether or not Sharpener actually believed his preposterous allegations or he was simply trying to get a rise out of him, Gohan couldn't say, but either way it was distinctly not cool for him to have said anything of the sort.

He frowned heavily at his male classmate, but was spared from speaking up on Videl's behalf by Erasa, who did it for him. "Just because she won't go out with you doesn't mean that she's got a guy on the side, Sharpener. The only 'activity' that she gets is kicking butt for the cops, and I would know."

'Right on!' an approving little voice cheered inside Gohan's head. His grin was back in full force now that Videl's reputation had been righted once again (such a morally righteous girl didn't deserve jealous slander, after all).

Turning back to Gohan, Erasa reassured him unnecessarily; "I'm sure she's just out arresting a few criminals before first bell, Gohan-kun, don't worry."

Startled by her choice of phrasing, Gohan was forced to gulp his heart back down his throat before replying, "W-Worried? What's to worry about?" His voice cracked against his will, anyway.

Erasa gave him a smile that implied she knew a little too much for his liking, but didn't press the issue. "Oh, no reason...Hey, did you, like, catch Videl-chan on TV last night? She was looking so cute kicking that scary guy in the face!"

— — —

First period had come and gone without Videl. Second, third and all the rest, too. If it wasn't like the daughter of Mr. Satan to be late, then why hadn't she shown up for school at all? No matter what Erasa said, Gohan was unsettled by the whole business. It was just so...so out of character for Videl to be completely absent for a whole day.

As it had been explained to him once – though he couldn't remember, exactly, who had done the explaining – she was always adamant about punctuality because she never knew why or when she was going to be pulled away from class again. With a concern that showed a surprising amount of care for her studies, Videl insisted upon being in as many of her courses as she possibly could be (crime fighting schedule allowing) so that she at least had a chance of getting into college without deferring to nepotism.

Then again, her stubborn nature also suggested that she didn't like taking help from anyone, so maybe it was more the fact that her pride wouldn't allow her to accept college admittance based on her parentage that kept Videl dedicated to her studies (though how she was going to be certain of getting into any school based solely on her credentials without changing her name was beyond Gohan's ability to imagine).

Either way, it was weird that Videl wasn't here at least for a few classes. Had there been a random and violent crime wave happening, he was sure that either someone would have brought it up or he would have seen evidence of it on his flight in that morning. As neither had occurred, Gohan had to assume that Videl was sick or...or something (he was hoping, for her sake, that it was the former; knowing Videl, the "or something" could mean anything from playing victim in a rescue attempt gone wrong to falling off a cliff in a bus full of senior citizens).

Knowing that he was staying in the city for a few extra hours to make his rounds as Saiyaman, Gohan made a note to himself to keep a lookout for his pig-tailed classmate and identity bounty hunter.

Stopping by his locker, Gohan put his thoughts about Videl on hold (for the first time that entire day) to recall his combination. With surprising success on his first try, the metal box opened gladly for him with a happy click. Good, that would ensure its survival for awhile longer than his gym locker...Gohan still hadn't thought up a reasonable excuse as to why the it had not only come off its hinges, but also been twisted and bent in half (saying he'd "found it that way" sounded so lame that Gohan hadn't blamed Videl for not buying it; even he was skptical about that one).

As the door swung forward to allow him admittance to his personal items, a piece of folded paper fell out and floated down to the floor. It came to rest on Gohan's shoes, innocently waiting for him to pick it up and investigate.

Doing so, he flipped it open and scanned the contents. When comprehension struck, his eyes widened to three times their normal proportions and the books the young demi-Saiyan had been planning to deposit into his locker fell from his limp hand onto the floor.

Videl had been kidnaped!

Wasting no time with picking up his books or even closing his locker, Gohan blurred down the hallway at top speed. He didn't worry about any of the potential witnesses left in his wake, focused as he was on what needed to be done.

He had to rescue Videl!

— — —

"If you ever want to see her alive again," the note had read in mismatched letters scavenged from newspaper clippings. "Then come to the abandoned warehouse on Route 696. Come alone, no cops!"

Though the opening to the challenge had caused Gohan's – no, wait, he was Saiyaman now – organs to squirm and writhe uncomfortably inside him, the villain's final request had been easy enough to honor. Not only would calling the police engage a city wide panic, but they would also be useless hindrances in the long run. This was definitely a job for Saiyaman!

Still unconscious of street names even after weeks of commuting to the city every morning, the costumed Gohan was forced to rely on Videl's chi signature to find his way to Route 696. She wasn't as easy to locate as, say, Vegeta or Piccolo, but at least she maintained the most powerful level amongst everyone (excluding himself, of course) in the city. That made locking onto her a relatively simple task; she stood out amongst the masses with her wild, fierce energy, just waiting for Gohan to come and find her.

Thus, that's what he decided to do.

Soon (but not soon enough), the warehouse spoken of in the ransom note came into view and Gohan tensed himself for confrontation. He was positive that he could defeat the criminals holding Videl against her will, but could he protect her from getting hurt? He certainly hoped so...

Touching down on the building's roof, Gohan immediately raced for the door that led to the stairwell. It was pointlessly locked, but that hardly got in his way (in fact, he might not have noticed it at all had the heavy metal door not made a loud creak of protest at being forcefully pulled out of its position). The stairs were exposed to him and Gohan took to them, forgoing the niceties of one step at a time and hopping from landing to landing as if he were on the long-absent moon.

The floor closest to the top was vacant; nothing but empty offices and discarded furniture. The next one down wasn't quite as empty, but Gohan would have to leave out how he had initially thought a rat in the head of an upside-down mop had been Videl in his retelling; she probably wouldn't appreciate that much.

On the floor beneath that, Gohan's luck changed. It was the primary level of the building – probably once used for manual labor and making plastic toy parts or Satan Flakes or something – and, right smack dab in the middle of the bare floor, was Videl!

Utilizing a bit of Super Saiyan speed, Gohan was at her side in less than a flash. Upon closer proximity, he realized that his classmate – bound, gagged and helpless – was unconscious. He couldn't see any superficial wounds to cause this state of lethargy, but assumed that someone had done this to her. Whoever that unlucky person was would eventually meet a very strong, very angry Saiyaman!

"It's okay, Videl-san," he reassured her with soft, consoling whisper as he began to unbind the knots holding her hands together. "I'll get you out of here..."

Videl didn't respond but, in her consenting condition, allowed him to help her in silence.

Finally managing to free her wrists from the rope, Gohan rolled Videl onto her back so that he could get a better look at her and judge what sort of shape she was in. No bruises...no blood...nothing to indicate how and why she had been rendered so helpless to his service. Even knowing Videl for such a short period of time had encouraged Gohan to believe that there was no way she would submit to the will of a kidnaper without a struggle, hence the reason why he was so utterly panicked about receiving the note in his locker.

A sudden jolt of fear pierced Gohan's heart. Had she been...poisoned? Was she even still alive? Sure, he had located her by her chi, but there was no reason why she couldn't have died in the meanwhile or left lingering traces of her energy to the atmosphere as she'd passed. Besides, the pressure of the situation was making it difficult for him to distinguish his chi from hers, meaning that his chances for an accurate reading of how much life she had left were shot.

He had to know!

Carefully spreading Videl out so that none of her appendages could get in his way, Gohan knelt beside her and leaned down to press his ear to her heart.

Damn. The helmet was in the way.

As fashionable as it was, it would have to go if Gohan was going to be able to tell for sure. He always had trouble locating the tell-tale pulse in someone's neck or wrist, so the direct method was the demi-Saiyan's only option.

With no thoughts spared to the other eyes that could be watching, Gohan lifted the protective gear from his head and revealed himself to anyone and everyone who might want to take a peek at Saiyaman's alter ego. What difference did a disguise make if it prevented him from assessing the damage to one of the few friends he had in his peer group?

Lowering his head to her chest again, Gohan placed his face between her breasts so that he could listen for signs of life. He knew he would be embarrassed about it later, but it seemed so unimportant when compared to knowing for sure whether or not he had gotten there in time.

Tha-thump...tha-thump...

Grinning at the sound of a steady heartbeat, Gohan felt all his bodily systems return to their normal duties. Videl was alive – probably perfectly fine – and he had rescued his damsel in distress! It just didn't get any better...

Tha-thump, tha-thump, tha-thump, tha-thump, tha-thump...

Wait, why was the pace increasing? That didn't make any sense if Videl was knocked out; it should remain slow and unvaried, just like if she were asleep of her own volition.

The sensation of slender fingers tangling themselves in his hair confirmed Gohan's second worst fear – Videl was awake and he was busted!

"I've got you now, Gohan-kun..."

Gohan made to pull his head back and sit up, but Videl had him firmly in her clutches. If he were to struggle, he'd run the risk of breaking her arms in the process (considering how tensely they were wrapped around him, anyway). Thus, he was trapped against her bosom – which now, come to think of it, was a completely inappropriate and sinful place to be – and at her mercy.

Roving his eyes upwards, Gohan peered at Videl from between the sloping valley formed by her breasts and gulped. She was looking at him that way again...the way that told him she was onto him and she wanted him to know it.

"I-I can explain!" Gohan attempted to say, accidentally clamping his mouth down on a forbidden place a couple of times. He hoped she wouldn't notice.

Consumed by her triumph, she obviously hadn't. "Oh? I'd love to hear this one..."

"W-Well...," Gohan began, but that was as far as he got. There really was no way out of the web she had ensnared him in. In lieu of any sort of defensive strategy, Gohan accused, "You tricked me!"

"Yeah, well, you started it, Mr. Saiyaman!" Videl countered, her know-it-all smirk widening to a full fledged grin. "What's a trick for a trick, anyway?"

Gohan was indignant about that one and his tone reflected such. "Saiyaman wasn't a trick! I was trying to help people without exposing my family to publicity!"

"It's not as bad as it sounds," Videl reassured him, digging her nails into his scalp. "You'll get used to it after...oh, a year or so."

The all-consuming fear was back, this time for himself. "Y-You wouldn't!"

"Oh, wouldn't I? Try me!" she challenged.

"Please don't..."

"Well...," said Videl, pretending to think over her terms. Gohan knew it was a device to make him sweat a little more. "I suppose I could keep your secret if you entered the Budokai next month."

"Th-The Budokai?" Gohan repeated. He didn't want to do that...all those people watching him fight...it would be a disaster! Half-jokingly, he suggested a different solution; "Wouldn't you rather go out on a date instead?"

Taking this as her cue to release him, Videl pulled Gohan up by his hair and pushed him away from her. She raised herself into a reclining position and slid away from him, undoubtedly disgusted by the prospect of doing anything romantic with her superhero classmate (Gohan had to admit that this hurt a little).

With a rosiness in her cheeks (anger? humiliation?) that hadn't been there during her haughty interrogation, Videl lost her patience and snapped at him. "Why would you want to go out on a date?"

Seizing the opportunity to right his mistake, Gohan forced himself to laugh at his own expense. "I w-was just kidding! I don't see you that way, Videl-san! C'mon!"

This seemed to be exactly the wrong thing to say, somehow. "So what's wrong with me, then?"

"Uh...um...well," Gohan had no idea how to respond to that. What should he say? Should he tell her that she was attractive and a date wouldn't really be such a horrible compromise to the situation? Or should he spare himself the hurt and the embarrassment of certain rejection by going with the "just friends" ploy? Either way, Gohan felt that he would lose. Thus, he settled for a non-committal reply somewhere in between; "N-Nothing!"

Sizing him up with an icy blue stare, Videl seemed to take that answer at face value (or, perhaps, she just didn't want to follow the thread of conversation to its inevitable and humiliating conclusion). "Whatever...So you'll enter, right?"

"...Do I really have to?"

"Yes!"

"Then, yes, I'll enter."

Videl's expression brightened immediately. The harsh gleam that had been present in her eyes disappeared and was replaced with the excited fervor that was always present when she got her way (or so he had off-handedly noticed from time to time...). "This'll be great!" she declared, pumping a fist into the air. "You're the son of Son Goku, right? One of the former Budokai champions?"

Oh, what was the point in lying anymore? "...Yeah."

Ah, there was that smile Gohan had been hoping for. Too bad he wasn't in a position to enjoy it. "Just think: the former champion's daughter against the former champion's son! Doesn't that sound exciting to you?"

Not particularly, in Gohan's opinion; as unique as Videl was amongst their human peers, there was no question that he could beat her easily. She didn't exactly offer strong competition. "Uh...I guess."

"Don't worry, I'll go easy on you," she promised. "You can even dress up like Saiyaman to hide your identity for all I care. Oh, I can't wait!"

With how animated her excitement over the prospect of kicking his ass was making her, Gohan lamented losing out on the date option, after all. Damn.

Sighing, Gohan pushed himself up into a standing position. Holding out a hand for Videl to take (like the gentleman his mother had raised him to be), he said, "Alright, but no more pretending to be kidnaped. That wasn't funny at all."

Still rewarding him with that impish smile, Videl took his hand and hoisted herself up by it. When they were fully upright and standing chest to chest (well, Videl's chest to Gohan's lower abdomen), she replied, "Sorry, Gohan-kun. Maybe that was a little mean..."

Gohan took a large step away from her and said, "Y-Yeah, it was." He was sure that the blush on his face was obvious, but felt that he did a good job obstructing it from view as he bent down to retrieve his helmet.

Donning it again for the sake of hiding it altogether, he bid her a farewell and brushed past her on his way to the doors that led to freedom (temporary freedom, at least).

"Wait, Gohan-kun!"

Unable to resist, Gohan turned back Videl's direction when she beckoned him. She was still standing in the middle of the vacant factory, smiling at him. "I want you to teach me how to fly, too. It's not fair if you're the only one who gets to do that in our match."

Gohan was genuinely surprised by that one. "Huh?"

"You know, fly," Videl repeated, pointing upwards. "That thing you do as you rush off to save people...?"

Since he couldn't think of a reason to tell her no (what with the blackmailing angle and everything), Gohan was forced to settle on the answer of 'yes.' "Uh...sure. It's a cinch."

"Great!" Videl exclaimed, walking towards the door herself and surpassing him. As she opened it and stepped out into the bright spring sunlight, she called over her shoulder, "I'll see you on Saturday!"

The door closed as Gohan was waving goodbye. "Yeah, see you on...," the self-appointed defender of Satan City trailed off as it hit him. "Wait, what do you mean 'see you on Saturday'? Videl-san!"

Even as he rushed to catch up, Gohan knew it was too late. If she was settled on this idea (which she almost always was), there would be no way to dissuade her from seeing it all the way through, Gohan's potential (though nonexistant) plans for the weekend be damned.

Well, perhaps if he taught her well she'd smile for him again. And, if that went alright, maybe he could get her into the habit of doing so more often...

END

— — —

Author's Notes: You know, I'll bet in the sober light of day I'll either pull this thing from the site or, at the very least, release a self-edited version in its place. I wouldn't have written this at all, but I got carried away on a whim...

In any event, this is an alternate, slightly more romantic version of how Videl unmasks Saiyaman. I'm sure there are plenty of mistakes and that it doesn't fit perfectly with the series, but that's what exchanging chapter content is for. Who's with me?

Now, off to finish writing Saiyaman: The Movie...wish me luck with that one n.n;

EDIT: Fixed a couple grammatical mistakes and formatting issues here and there...if you spot any more, let me know.

. ( . Ms Videl Son . ) .

–Who's your daddy? GohanVidel