Hello to all! I'm Priscilla. This is a short little one-shot. I sorta picked it off from a theme on Tumblr. With the release of Chris Colfer (Kurt's) new song "As If We Never Said Goodbye", we all thought maybe it could be Kurt's goodbye song. So I will be building it off of that. So few things:
1) Those of you who are still awaiting an update from my other fic "Of Bows and Kurtsies", I apologize of my lack of updating or not updating at all for that matter. Just been so busy lately...and not with school work. Also, writer's block is a bitch!
2) The song...a real tearjerker. Try listening to it along reading this. I almost cried myself reading my own story
3) I dont own Glee, RM does.
AS IF WE NEVER SAID GOODBYE
Kurt couldn't even begin to muster the inner turmoil within himself. He missed New Directions and Blaine said it himself.
It shouldn't come as a surprise. Though it is and Kurt doesn't even know what to do anymore. He wants to tell Blaine goodbye, yet he can't bring himself to do it. How do you do something like this to your boyfriend?
Kurt's eyes widened in realization at what he should do. He had to do this the only way Blaine could've…sing it.
Kurt stood outside the door of the Warbler practice room shaking in nervousness. Wearing a black shirt and plants, top hat, white straightjacket, and fingerless gloves he felt almost like himself again. The same way he did when he decided to sing Blackbird.
He shuddered at the sudden wave of Nostalgia. Should he do this? Yes. After watching New Directions and Mercedes belting their heart out, he really began to feel what homesickness felt like.
Okay Kurt Hummel, you've got to do this. No turning back now he thought to himself as he pushed the door open.
The first thing that met his eye was Blaine smiling at him with a look that slowly turned intrigued and curious. Kurt sighed.
"Kurt, what's with the outfit?" Blaine couldn't help but chuckle. So lively and carefree. Kurt winced at that.
"What? Did Pavarotti resurrect from the dead and die again?" Jeff piped from behind him. All the other Warblers couldn't help but giggle a little.
"Um..no one's dying. No. But I have some very important news to tell all of you." Kurt said directly towards Blaine. This didn't go unnoticed by the Warbler soloist himself.
"What is it Kurt?" Blaine asked, suddenly worried as he stared at Kurt's eyes almost brimming with tears. Something's off Blaine noted as he took in Kurt's composure.
"I hope you don't mind, but I'd like to sing it." Kurt handed a CD to Wes who put it into the music player.
Kurt heaved a sigh as the orchestra from the song was already deeply affecting him. He took note of Blaine who was suddenly very attentive and worried. Kurt started with a shaky and trembling breath.
I don't know why I'm frightened
I know my way around here.
The cardboard trees
The painted seas
The sound here
He looked at Blaine for a moment was lost and confused. That was a mistake. He could already feel the tears starting to break surface.
Yes, a world to rediscover
But I'm not in any hurry
And I need a moment
Kurt looked Blaine straight in the eye, begging him to get his message. He didn't need to make it harder than it already was. Blaine got it. He looked towards Kurt with tears that weren't held back, but clouding his vision making Kurt look blurry. Talk about irony. He was already slipping from Blaine's fingers. He could feel it.
The whispered conversations
In overcrowded hallways
The atmosphere
As thrilling here as always
He scanned the saddened looks on the Warblers faces. They got the message too. All of the Warblers knew it was coming, but they didn't think so soon. Not when they finally got the chance to really accept Kurt as a Warbler. Blaine let a single tear slide from his cheek. Kurt has said enough. He walked away leaving the Warblers in pure misery and remorse. Blaine ran after Kurt, unsure at what his legs were doing. All he knew was that he couldn't let Kurt slip away from him.
Feel the early morning madness
Feel the magic in the making
Why, everything's as if we never said goodbye
Blaine didn't know what to say, let alone do. It hurt. He pleaded Kurt with his eyes flowing tears. Kurt said nothing and gave him a firm kiss on the lips, pouring in as much passion as he could. Kurt broke off and walked away before tears could fall of his own. Blaine watched as Kurt walked away. Away from Dalton. Away from the Warblers. Away from him. Him and the precious memories kept within it. Blaine can feel the images returning to him now. Their first look at the Dalton staircase. When Blaine and the Warblers sang Teenage Dream. Blaine giving Kurt Pavarotti as his eyes lit up and cheeks rosy and alive. He remembered when Kurt tried out for the solo, didn't make it and Blaine still comforted him and the feeling they got when they tied with New Directions. He remembers when Kurt did that Christmas duet and going to the Mckinley High football game. He remembers Valentine's Day and Kurt confession. Lastly, he remembers the Blackbird number, their kiss. Every kiss. Every touch. Every smile. This was where it all started and now Kurt's finally leaving. Tears were free-falling by now and frankly, Blaine didn't care.
Kurt looked out his bedroom window. Gray. Empty. He went to school not bothering to change his clothes from yesterday. He sang softly and sadly to himself.
I've spent so many mornings
Just trying to resist you
I'm trembling now
You can't know how
I've missed you
He stared longingly at the picture of Blaine on his dresser. One that resembles the one in his locker at Mckinley. Mckinley. This is what he's doing it for. Mckinley.
Missed the fairy tale adventures
In this ever spinning playground
We were young together
He blinked back tears and got into his car. Driving, trying to forget his memories of Blaine..for now. He parked into the Mckinley High parking lot. It looked so foreign and he shrunk back a little when he saw Karofsky in a distance. He exhaled deeply his head swimming with images of Blaine the night before. Broken and crying. He HAD to do this.
I'm coming out of makeup
The lights already burning
Not long until
The cameras will start turning
He walked across the parking lot. Ignoring the stares of everyone, the appalled looks that the Diva was back.
And the early morning madness
And the magic in the making
Yes, everything's as if we never said goodbye
He hid in a corner when he saw the shadow of Dave Karofsky. His mind flickered with recognition. He had his friends. He wasn't entirely alone in his part.
I don't want to be alone
That's all in the past
This world's waited long enough
I've come home at last
He burst through the doors of Mckinley. He breathed deeply. He was smiling to himself. He is bigger and brighter. Dalton changed him completely in a positive way, and for that he must acknowledge. But his time there was over. Everyone knew it but he just didn't want to admit it. He feels better. Accomplished. Nothing can hold him back in Mckinley now.
And this time will be bigger
And brighter than we knew it
So watch me fly
We all know I can do it
He opened his locker with a shaky grasp. He very much knew what was on the other side of the locker.
Could I stop my hand from shaking?
Has there ever been a moment
With so much to live for?
He stared at the picture of Blaine. Yes, his tears were falling now, but he just let it flow.
The whispered conversations
In overcrowded hallways
So much to say not just today
But always
His phone buzzed with an incoming text message. Courage. Kurt's eyes have more than clouded over by now. Blaine is still here. He's there for him and even if they are apart, they'll make it work. Calm washed over him only to be hit with a wave of courage.
We'll have early morning madness
We'll have magic in the making
He took one last look at the text before him. He was touched that Blaine was doing this. He looked at Blaine's picture and whispered softly. It was if they never said goodbye.
Yes, everything's as if we never said goodbye
Yes, everything's as if we never said goodbye
He closed the locker, wiping away his tears. There was no need of them. He walked slowly, out to the quad. In only a moment he found New Directions. He smiled. He thought of Blaine. Thank You Kurt thought. He whispered softly with a slight smile.
We taught the world new ways to dream.
Another text. Courage. Kurt could feel it in him. Everything is going to be okay. He put on the best smile he could muster walked up to New Directions and yelled proudly at the top of his lungs," KURT HUMMEL IS BACK AT MICKINLEY!"
So there it is. I apologize if it's a little rushed and terrible. Yesterday was HECTIC and when i mean HECTIC i mean the best fucking day of my entire life! Those of you on Tumblr know that. Also, WHO SAY THE DC LIVESTREAM? it was so awesome. so tell me what you think about it. We'll VOTE! ;D
Also, I was thinking...if that spoiler pic of the Warblers at Mckinley had Kurt in the top hat, wouldn't SOWK happen in that scene? If you guys want me to write that little scene, comment in the little suggestion box down yonder...