"Sakura hates me." The words dropped out of Naruto's mouth from the thick, heavy air that was suffocating both himself and Kakashi. He had known the time would have come when Naruto would have to voice the painful revelation that had been haunting all three of them for the last month. Sakura's smile had changed into something hollow and her eyes became vacant every time she looked at Naruto. Though the words were the same the love she once felt for her teammate had morphed into an sad mixture of guilt, hate, and regret.
"Naruto..." Kakashi started, but any comforting denial he could offer Naruto right now would be a lie. He had seen it. They all had witnessed Sasuke's last moments in this world. His lost student took the fatal blow Madara tried to deal Naruto. For the first time in years Sasuke's murderous broken eyes softened as he delicately cupped Naruto's face and placed a bloody, but chaste kiss on the blonds mouth. Sasuke spent his last words in this world on his rival. Sasuke claimed that it was love and maybe Kakashi didn't understand love as much as he should, but he figured it as fact that it shouldn't leave a strong man so broken for so long and his life in shambles after it was all over.
Sakura had rushed to Sasuke's side trying to desperately heal him all while wailing how much she loved him and she would die with him. Sasuke didn't even acknowledged her. The man she had loved for so long and would have given anything to have back had left her with nothing. Though he tried, how could he hate her for not being stronger than him. Kakashi now hated Sasuke after all.
"She is trying not to, but she still wishes it was me that died and not Sasuke. Maybe it should have-"
"Naruto!" His voice came harsher then he intended, he was angry at Sakura, Sasuke, and everyone who can't shoulder the burden of their own pain including himself. All of them dropped it selfishly at at Naruto's feet knowing that he would take it all on himself. Kakashi sighed and calmed his voice before continuing. "You saved Sasuke. You pulled him from his living hell and he died human because of you. He gave his life to protect his most precious person."
"It hurts so much. Sasuke loved me. Sakura loved Sasuke. I love them both and couldn't-."
"Stop acting like a brat You save the ones you can as much as you can and endure the hatred and cherish the love." Kakashi interrupted. Naruto looked like he was going to continue his self-depreciating rant, but instead dropped his head down and began to gently sob. Kakashi cursed his inadequacies in situations like this.
"I know, sensei, but it still hurts." Naruto rasped. Kakashi took a step toward and placed a hand on top of Naruto's head. The motion was a bit awkward on his part and for the first time in awhile he wished his natural grace as a ninja transferred to acts of comfort. "Naruto, a ninja is not supposed to cry-"
"I know." Naruto all but whispered and took a tiny step closer into the hand.
"-but if he does have to cry, he should do it in solitude-"
"I know," Naruto hand reached out and grasped a small portion of Kakashi's shirt.
"-unless he is in the presence of another shinobi who is willing to bear his burden with him." Kakashi let his hand gently slide to the back of the boy's head, hoping Naruto would take that gesture as invitation to lean on him.
"Hai, sensei." Naruto's quiet sobs turned into painful wails and he buried his face in Kakashi's chest. Kakashi's could feel the warmth, the weight of Naruto's body pressed against him. The boy who was becoming the strongest ninja ever and a man he respected above all others still needed him. His stomach churned. He wanted.
Naruto's crying started to wane after what, Kakashi's inner clock told him, was about thirty-two minutes give or take a couple seconds and he carefully began to pull his face from the depth of Kakashi's shirt. Long clear strands of snot linked them together. His former student, with his red swollen face, looked up sheepishly and muttered an apology, before wiping his side of things with his sleeve. Kakashi was reminded again of the boy that still lurked beneath the grown-up surface and as annoying as he once thought it was it had now become endearing.
"Ah, lets get cleaned up." The copy ninja said dismissing the sorry. He carefully removed the soiled shirt, careful not to get any of the mess on his mask or anywhere else. He grabbed Naruto by the wrist and made his way toward the bathroom. He sat Naruto on the closed toilet and he then began to fill his small tub with warm water. He got some clean towels from the linen closet. When the tub was filled to a good level he turned off the faucet and looked toward Naruto.
The young man was groggily staring at the bath. A small uncertain sigh escaped as he moved toward the blonde not sure what he was supposed to do or what he was going to do. Kakashi hesitated for a few minutes watching the blond so worn and sad. The two people that meant so much to him, to both of them, Sasuke and Sakura, were for all intent and purposes gone. He was lonely. Kakashi wanted to touch him. He wanted to grab both of his swollen cheeks and kiss the life right back into him. Make love to him until he was no longer crying, but screaming out in pleasure. He wanted the only pain in his apartment to be the sting of Naruto's nails digging into his back or Naruto's teeth tearing into the flesh of his shoulder. Kakashi inwardly shuddered as his desires made themselves known.
Naruto began to slowly undress himself. Kakashi was only going to glance, but was caught in the vision of Naruto's slim tanned torso. The silver-haired ninja's breath hastened gently and he forced his legs to move backwards.
"Sensei?" Naruto looked at him with confusion in his eyes. For half of a second Kakashi thought that he had been caught. The gears of his mind began to spin rapidly trying to conjure up anything that would explain away his lecherous aura.
"You loved my father Kakashi-sensei." The statement came matter of fact, so much so that Kakashi had no response for it, but still inwardly sighed relief. "Did you know my mother?" the blonds blue eyes focused on him intently waiting for the answer.
"Yes."
"What was she like?
"She was loud, violent, a little brash, she talked a lot, had a short temper-" The young man eyes turned to slivers and Kakashi felt the corner of his lips quirk upwards despite himself. "-she was beautiful, protective, strong in spirit and body, and loyal. She's the kind of woman who would take a snot nosed brat knock him over the head for being an idiot then cook him up a feast. She had a good heart. " Naruto smiled gently still sitting in Kakashi's bathroom shirt hanging messily in his hand.
"I'm glad I got to meet her." the small smile grew into a grin and Naruto stood up and unbuttoned his pants. Kakashi immediately retreated.
Naruto wasn't in the bath for as long as Kakashi was expecting, he just finished putting clean linens on his bed for the other young man and was just about to start the tea. The blond walked out a with a towel slung low on his hips a few stray water droplets made a lazy path from his moist hair to his chest. Kakashi busied himself quickly in the kitchen with the tea and prayed the boy wouldn't move closer.
"Naruto, there is some clothes in the top drawer in my bedroom you can put on." Kakashi called out from underneath his bowed head and was relieved when he heard the retreating footsteps . He finished making tea and set out two cups on his small kitchen table just as the blond was walking back in. Naruto was wearing a pair of his pants, which were too big for him. They hung bunched around his ankles and sat low on his hips. He wasn't wearing a shirt.
"Kakashi-sensei...um I was wondering can I stay here tonight? I just don't want to..."
"I've already prepared your sleeping arrangements." Kakashi smiled and motioned for the them to sit down at the table.
"Thanks." Naruto grinned and Kakashi heart ached. The feelings of want and need that had just begun to trickle out recently after being suppressed so long rushed to the surface. Kakashi felt his hand tighten slightly on his tea cup and small drops of sweat start to form on his neck. Kakashi urged himself to relax before any noticeable signs presented themselves to Naruto. Though if he was honest with himself, on Naruto's best day he would probably be oblivious to most subtle signs of human attraction. Still he needed to be careful for his own sake for fear of opening the flood gates and jumping the poor boy he couldn't force the young man to deal with what he realized now were his growing desire and love for the him right now. Naruto was at such a vulnerable state and Kakashi had a feeling he was too.
Naruto sat in exhausted silence, being lulled there by the combination of the day's events and the boring street noises making their way past the window. Kakashi took quickly slipped down his mask and sipped the rest of his tea while Naruto stared down at his own. Naruto eye's began to glaze over and a little line of drool pooled at the corner of his mouth.
"You better get some sleep Naruto, I have some new training we can try tomorrow." Kakashi said hoping to cheer the boy up, but instead he ended up startling him. After the initial jump Naruto rose and followed obediently to the bedroom. Kakashi helped him lay down, but before he could turn to leave Naruto latched on to his arm.
"Please, Kakashi-sensei," Naruto begged. Kakashi had already came up with a ten reasons why he should make his bed on the couch and played them each two times in his head, but the pleading eyes of Naruto made it impossible to refuse. Kakashi slowly walked to the other side of the bed and crawled in almost mechanically, uncomfortable with the idea of being tested when his feelings for Naruto were still so raw and new. Though he didn't doubt the strength and honesty of his heart nor Naruto's for that matter, but everything was still so foreign. Breaking or or even damaging it was something he was terrified of doing.
Naruto, hesitantly reached toward him and touched his masked face, letting his warm hands ghost their way down to Kakashi's bare chest. Kakashi allowed himself to relish in the touch for a breath before wrapping his hands around Naruto's smaller ones and bringing them up to touch his mask again. Naruto's breath noticeably sped up as Kakashi ran Naruto's fingers across his covered lips before bringing them up to pull down his mask. Naruto's swallowed loudly as a look of fearful anticipation appeared on his face as each centimeter became visible. When Kakashi's face was finally bare he brought Naruto's hands up to his lips again and kissed them gently. Naruto just lay there eyes wide and mouth agape.
"Say, Naruto its impolite to stare." Kakashi lightly chastised, a little bit uncomfortable with his own self-incited exposure.
"Beautiful." Naruto breathed out. Kakashi figured he didn't mean to voice his opinion out loud because his face pinked when he heard his own voice. "I...uh...Kakashi-sensei?"
"Yes, Naruto?" Kakashi answered slightly amused.
"Can I? Is it okay?" Naruto couldn't bring himself to ask so he just slid his body closer until it was flush with Kakashi's. Kakashi felt the others hardness and closed his eyes to get himself under control and grab hold of the situation before it went farther than it should. "Is it...I mean...do you want?" Naruto rubbed himself clumsily against him to try and get his point across.
"Naruto, I don't think-" Kakashi tried to get out as he maneuvered Naruto's body a few inches away so he could get himself in check. He had to be sure this is what Naruto wanted and not just the neediness of his current state combined with teenage hormones. If he let Naruto into his heart now he could never let him out again.
"Yeah, you're right. Its kinda stupid huh? Sorry, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto fumbled out an apology as he got out of the bed. "I'll take the couch. Thanks for letting me stay here." Naruto grabbed the handle to the door and Kakashi moved fast as he ever had. He couldn't let the blond slip away wounded. The second he caught the blonde he turned him, grabbed the back of his head and pressed their lips firmly together.
"Naruto, I never wanted anything so much as I want to be inside you right now." Kakashi broke their kiss and whispered hotly in Naruto's ear. The boy whimpered and grabbed onto his shoulders to steady himself. "except being able to always stand by your side. I won't risk that for one night."
"Kakashi-sensei, losing the people that I love has made me realize how important the ones that are left are and how fleeting the time I have with them. I'm not gonna be a afraid of my heart anymore." Naruto wrapped his arms around Kakashi's neck and brought their lips together again, still awkward, but the feelings were real. Kakashi decided to trust in their bond and welcomed the boys fumbling tongue in his mouth. As soon as Kakashi gave the young man the okay the boy melted against him and Kakashi was forced to support both their weight. Naruto was all over him pushing, rubbing, trying to get as much physical contact as possible. Kakashi sighed in amusement at the desperation of the boy.
"Naruto, hold to my shoulders. " Kakashi ordered gently. As soon as Naruto had complied Kakashi lifted the blonde up and maneuvered them to the bed and then it was his turn. He let his more experienced hands explore the young body below him. Kakashi let his hands glide up the shirt Naruto was wearing while the young man huffed out each of his hurried breaths as a desperate plea for more. Naruto's virginity was obvious and though Kakashi was ashamed that it did, it turned him on that much more. Just knowing he would be the first person to slip himself inside the blonde turned him on past the point of no return. Only he would be able to give the Naruto this thing he'd been needing since he'd been too young to actually have it. A true companion, something more than a teacher, teammate, best friend, crush, rival or even a lover. Kakashi made a silent apology and promise to his sensei and freed Naruto of the constricting clothing he was wearing.
Naruto for his part clawed desperately at Kakashi's bare skin ungracefully, but eager to please and be pleased. Rubbing his naked form lewdly against Kakashi's clothed bottom half made the older man realize how inconvenient wearing pants were and rectified the situation by freeing his own cock and pressing the blood heavy organ against Naruto's. The blonde let a visceral moan and wrapped his inexperienced fingers around the both of them and gave a couple experimental tugs before curling into himself and coming. Kakashi felt the warm spurts against his belly and chest and clutched the sheets to keep from joining the other in release. Though Kakashi had confidence in his sexual prowess he knew he lacked the unmeasurable stamina of a seventeen year old Naruto.
Naruto's body relaxed and a lazy smile appeared on his face. Kakashi kissed the young man gently on the face and neck trying to lightly coax him back to reality. It took about ten seconds before the fire was relit inside of Naruto and he was back to pressing and rubbing himself against Kakashi. "Slow down Naruto." Kakashi whispered into Naruto's hair as he pressed his body down more firmly to slow the boy's wanton movements.
"He-he sorry." Naruto sheepishly mumbled as he downcast his eyes. "I just never..." Kakashi could feel the boy withdraw slightly, and instantly regretted the lack of tenderness in his words. Years of being a social outcast for reasons unknown to him at the time had left a scar on Naruto and the latest betrayal seem to only deepen the old wounds. The boy who had the uppermost confidence in his abilities on the battlefield even with the doubts of the whole world on his shoulders, was lost in a sea of uncertainty and fear when confronted with the hint that he may be wrong in some way in situations of intimacy.
"Shh, Naruto." Kakashi cooed gently as traced his lips gently across the boys face. "I want you so much, you can feel it, can't you." He forced the blonde's hand onto his erection and moaned in appreciation of the touch. "Don't doubt."As the last word of reassurance slipped from his mouth Kakashi maneuvered his body so his face was right above Naruto angry red cock. He gave one playful steady lick before sucking the whole thing into his mouth. Naruto screamed and dug his fingers into his silver mop of hair. Kakashi had to fight the steel grip to keep from chocking on the younger man. In retrospect it might have been a better idea to work up to sucking someone as sensitive and with as much vigor as Naruto off.
Kakashi gave an amused sigh and worked his head out of the tight grip by coaxing the boy to flip over with his ass in the air. Once the plump globes were presented to him he grabbed each cheek and gently pulled them apart and circled the tiny opening with his tongue. Naruto became mush. All the vitality he demonstrated before gave way to gently mewing heap of flesh. Kakashi knew instantly he picked the right course of action and forced his tongue deeper inside the blonde and was rewarded with a keening moan. Kakashi could feel each of the erotic noises coming from his lover's mouth heat the flames of desire and it was addicting. Kakashi continued his ministrations until Naruto reached the right level of relaxation. He then pulled his mouth from the pliable opening, wet his fingers, and slid one inside. Naruto's breath came in sharp pants and for a second Kakashi thought he might have gone to far until the boy pushed his ass back onto the digit. The Copy Ninja took that as his cue and added another finger. Naruto barely let it pass the tight ring of muscle before he was pushing back again. Well Naruto never did anything half-ass. Kakashi gripped the base of his own cock to hold off the looming orgasm. The sight of the blonde's red lustful face and those slutty moans was driving the older nin insane.
"Kakashi-sensei...Please." Naruto whined. Never had Kakashi felt so dirty and turned on as when Naruto used that honorific. He couldn't wait any longer. He lined himself up against Naruto's opening and glided himself home. Naruto fit him like a glove all snug, hot and mind meltingly perfect. He only indulged the feeling for a couple seconds before pulling most of the way out and sheathing himself again. Naruto for his part lost all ability to speak and was just making incoherent sounds of pleasure. Kakashi had a feeling he might have already come again, but knowing Naruto he was rock hard again.
"Naruto, I can't hold out much longer." Kakashi mumbled as he felt his vision start to tunnel.
"So... good... Kakash'...sensei" and that did it. Kakashi grabbed tightly to the boys hips and emptied himself as deep as he could go inside him. The perfect blissful moment passed and Kakashi eased himself out of Naruto, but not without protest.
"Shh..Its okay Naruto. I'll get something to clean us up with and then we can sleep." Kakashi got up and walked into his bathroom and grabbed a clean cloth, but by the time he got back Naruto was already fast asleep. Kakashi wiped him down the best he could and maneuvered him to one side of the bed under the covers. Then after giving one last look over their bodies and the room slipped under the covers next to his new lover. Kakashi was still not convinced if this was the ideal beginning for them, but he had finally came to the conclusion it was the best either of them could hope for. Naruto stirred and buried himself in Kakashi's side. For the first time in years peaceful sleep seemed an unbreakable promise and he finally closed his eyes.