NOT MINE... Mentions abuse and sucide
When I'm out in the world all everyone sees is Rayna James the Queen of Country Music but behind closed doors you would see black and blue and a weak and powerless woman. There are days I'm surprised no one has noticed anything amiss but then again how would they two pounds of cover up and a fake smile plastered on my face can cover up anything that you want it to. Even my daughters don't know the truth about their daddy because he is always careful to never do it when they are around, he is careful not to break anything, and he trust me to cover up the bruises on my face and hide the ones on my arms and legs. I always believed that if I was ever in a situation like this that I would not stand for it but you never realize how scary it is to leave until you are in the situation. With every hit, punch, slap, and kick I receive I become more hollow until there is nothing left of me but and empty shell. The meaning of happiness eludes me, the meaning of safety and security don't belong in my dictionary. He has complete control of me, I bow before him and do whatever he wants afraid of the consequences if I don't. I beg for a knight in shining armor to come rescue you from the darkness, actually I beg for Deacon. But months pass and I realize that no one is going to safe me and that I am alone in this eternal abyss of darkness. One day the pain was so bad that I took pills to help numb it I lost count of how many I had taken but, when I was done I felt nothing the pain didn't exist anymore. It was the best I've felt in years, I was free from the evil I was haunted with everyday and I was free from the pain I had endured from the devil himself. Tomorrow the headlines will read " Rayna James; Queen of Country Music Reigns No More", people will cry, my daughters hearts will break, and Deacon will relapse. My funeral will take place for the world to see and even Juliette will show up and cry over the lose of another mother figure. I know that this will destroy many life's but I can't seem to care about them because after suffering for moths I am finally FREE.