He's a distant memory, not a good one that lays warm and safe in your head, or a bad one that sticks to you like super glue and never lets you free.
It's a strange one that's not good or bad, just somehow there waiting to be opened up.
Some days I don't think of him and the lips that seemed to like mine too much and then there's a day that all I can think of is him and that night that was in a different time and a different me.
Most of the time I want to slip away into another life, another time where I could grab on to his (man with blue tights and hero branded on his chest) cape and pull him back before he flies away, to the black of space and light of the stars.
Sorry, and with a kiss he's gone, slipping into the night like a blue and red star, as it shots away across the black sky and all I can think is I didn't get my wish, no, no, he took it with him.
"You, you what are you doing here?"
He came, he came with a dusty face from a dusty memory that never seemed to be real, and all it had been doing was rotting in the locked parts of my brain along with the memory of him.
"Me? I should be asking you that question, Miss Lane, what are you doing? I came because I heard the cries of a damsel in distress."
It was and wasn't like the last time, the trapped animal feeling that I felt deep in my bones the last time came back slipping in like it was meant to be, that time was maybe months ago, maybe years ago, who's counting the days? Not me.
He blended in with the black so well that I was sure he was part of it, the only color coming from the flashing of white teeth and his flushed cheeks that came a little to close and left me with the scent of blood for days after.
"You heard me? I guess you picked up some more powers along the way, didn't you? Well, I don't have any superpower to speak of and my tears are none of your business, so why don't you just take your feet and point them toward the door?"
The low chuckle floated and inched its way under my skin and there it stayed and sent shivers every moment it was trapped within me.
I didn't need this, didn't need him standing here like a shadow and laughing at my wet cheeks that seemed would never dry as long as he was up in the sky, flying though the stars.
A little voice came sneaking in, the one that I've tried to keep locked away, is he thinking of me, does he care, no, no.
"And why would I go and do that, Miss Lane? I can handle blood, brains and things you've only seen in your nightmares but the one thing I can't handle is tears, yours."
My feet did the work for me, stepping back away from this strange murderous man as he let one of his fingers touch my wet cheeks, full of tears for him and him alone.
He could hear my heart growing louder and louder as he came closer and closer, thump-thump, thump-thump.
"S-Stop it, Sylar, stop it."
His fingers flicked away at his name, loud and clear in my throat almost a growl of anger at this stranger, coming in my home, with his silly and chilling words, what right did he have?
"Sometimes my name is Gabriel, Gabriel Gray. Only sometimes, and those sometimes are with you."
It was a reply of that day, burned into my brain with a kiss, it came fast and without warning but something was different and strange as they pulled me in once again.
It was soft and gentle something that that this man was not and would never be, and somehow this Sylar turned into a new name that wanted to be said, Gabriel, Gabriel Gray.
"You're not crying any more, damsel."