I was bored so I decided to write a parody on NaruSasu relationships. I have nothing against the pairing, if the story is written well, but some people just write that they're rivals and just sort of jump one another. Anyway, this contains yaoi, obviously, so don't read if you don't like. And maybe a curse word or two.
Naruto: total confidence I will become Hokage!
Sasuke: pure terror You can't!
Naruto: confusion Why the hell not?
Sasuke: smugness Because you must stay with me!
Naruto: confusion again Why?
Sasuke: hysterics Cause I'm not really a bad ass boy. I'm really just a boy whose placed thick icy walls around his heart and was just waiting for the right guy to come along and melt them so they could see the real me underneath. Now that you have, you must fall for me either in lust or love and have hot passionate sex with me on our first date.
Naruto: defiant Give me one good reason.
Sasuke: smugness again I can do things in bed that would make even Kakashi-sensei's perverted mind squirm.
Naruto: confusion again again But I thought I was crushing on Sakura.
Iruka: teacheryness No no no. that was just a cover for how you really felt about Sasuke.
Naruto: pure confusion Huh. Amazing how I'm only just learning this now. But I don't care! I will become the next Hokage!
Sasuke: pout But what about poor little me, the boy whose family was butchered by his older brother?
Naruto: annoyance Quit complaining! At least you were loved at one point!
Sasuke: smug happiness That is exactly why you must stay with me! I shall love your body, if not your soul or personality, until one of us dies!
Naruto: happy neutralism Oh, okay. Then when I become Hokage you shall stay with me and we will love each other's bodies, if not each other's souls or personalities, and have hot passionate sex every night twice and sometimes another two, or six, during the day.
Sasuke: pure bliss Yay!
-- That was so pathetically pointless, it wasn't even remotely funny.