"Hatred, which could destroy so much, never failed to destroy the man who hated, and this was an immutable law."

-James Baldwin

She wasn't sure.

Wasn't sure when she had started to care.

Or when she started to notice him.

Maybe it was when they spotted him in the robe shop with his mother. The bleak and disturbed look on his face had somewhat drug her in.

She wanted..

She wanted to know what demons lay behind that stoic mask.

Closing her eyes, she gripped the pages of her potions book. A snicker behind her signaled that Malfoy had cracked another joke at one of her classmates expense.

And there he was.

The mask.

It befell his face about 90% of the time. It shielded his emotions, clouded over his facial expressions, withered them down to nothing but a smirk or a sneer.

But then, there was the other 10% of the time.

When he would be sitting at lunch, and would just laugh at a joke, Hermione would watch as a strange, foreign emotion would flit across his eyes. It was brief and fleeting, almost not noticable, for those who didn't pay attention.

But she was.

Had been since that ghostly expression in the dress shop.

Ever since her best friend Harry Potter had mumbled the words that he might be a death eater.

For some reason, when he muttered those syllables Hermione felt a brief moment of breathlessness. She had never thought of Draco Malfoy capable of doing something so foolish. But then again, she knew nothing about him.

His father was a death eater though.

But, that didn't make him one.

From that moment on, she watched him. All the little quips, harsh words, nasty smiles, bullying.

She watched it all.

And, in conclusion, it all left her feeling extremely bad for him.

He was so lost it almost made her want to weep.

Blast Lucius Malfoy. He had made sure that his son was a bastard.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she took a deep breath.

Turning, she chanced a glance in his general direction, he was currently looking down at his own Potions book, his pale fingers drumming on the page. His eyebrows were knitted together, his grey eyes distant.

Distance.

Another emotion.

Hermione flipped open her notebook and wrote that down.

There was a list that she wrote down, she had at least five terms written down now.

Malice.

Hatred.

Sadness.

Confusion.

Distance.

Closing the notebook again, she turned her head back again. He was now staring forward, his eyes holding there usual glassy hue. Sighing in disappointment, she faced the front of the classroom again.

"Hermione." Harry said to her, snapping her out of her strange thoughts regarding the Slytherin.

"Yes Harry?" She asked him, meeting his green eyes.

"You just look out of it. Is everything alright?"

Smiling, she nodded her head, scraping her fork across her peas. Across from her Ron was shoveling food into his mouth. Smirking, she scooped up some of her own food and chowed down.

Harry and Ron were starting to talk about Quidditch now, and she completely drowned them out. A shriek on the other side of the room, in the direction of the Hufflepuffs and the Ravenclaws made her turn around, seeing what the noise was.

A small Hufflepuff girl was covered in what looked like mashed potatoes was crying in her seat. Hermione's eyes trailed to the Slytherin table, pinpointing the ones giggling.

Crabbe, Pansy, and Goyle.

They were cackling with laughter, slapping each others hands.

Hermione glared at them, annoyed that they were so cruel to others.

She did notice though that Malfoy was not laughing, if anything, a foreign emotion was on his features now.

Annoyance.

Hermione stared at him, watching for a sneer or a little chuckle. He seemed tense, uncomfortable.

Very odd.

An older Hufflepuff walked over to the young girl and helped her up, escorting her out of the Great Hall. The whole house was now glowering at the Slytherins. Usually, this house got on pretty well with everybody, but there were bad seeds in every house. Crabbe and Goyle were just imbeciles. Everyone knew that.

The emotion that was on Malfoys face was no longer there.

The same cold sneer was back in its place.

Sighing, she turned and tuned back into the conversations around her. She needed to remember to write down that new emotion down in her notebook.

Dinner was over, and she had a Potions essay to write. Professor Snape had been loading them down for some odd reason, you'd think for a man who absolutely despised all the children at Hogwarts, except for his own house of course, that he would get tired of grading their essays.

Hermione glanced at her watch, it was now 7:30. She hoped no-one else was in the library, she didn't want to fight anyone for a table.

Poking her head in, she listened for any noise.

Silence.

Good.

Trodding in, she gave a little hello to Madame Pince.

Hermione was browsing, relishing in the smells of the books that filtered up through her nostrils. The old bindings crackled under her fingertips, making her smile.

This was her heaven.

She plucked a few up that would assist her and plopped herself down on one of the back tables.

A few minutes through jotting down a few notes a little cough caught her attention. Looking to the table that was not in her line of vision, she glimpsed a bit of light blonde hair.

Malfoy.

Great. She did not want a run in with him.

If she was quiet enough, maybe he wouldn't notice her. Watching him, he suddenly stood, a book tucked under his arm.

Great.

Shoving her head down, she continued to write.

A little chuckle made her glance up, and then roll her eyes.

Yes, luck was definitely not on her side.

"Look who it is." Malfoy said, moving his book from one arm to the other.

'Ignore him Hermione. Ignore him.'

"Nothing to say Mudblood?"

The hateful word made her grit her teeth. Sighing, she looked up, glaring at him.

"Malfoy. I am busy, don't you have anything else to do?"

Cold.

His eyes were like grey ice cubes glowering down at her.

His sneer was prominently placed, as always.

She looked down at the pages again, finding a word to center on while he smirked at her.

Suddenly, he snatched up what she was reading and knocked it to the floor.

What an immature little brat.

She snapped her head up to his and glared at him. "Listen Malfoy, could you take your childish antics elsewhere, there are some people here that actually care about their academics!"

"But you're so fun to mess with Granger."

Hermione thought of something.

Reaching up, she touched his hand,gripping his left cuff to his shirt.

Malfoy ripped his hand away, backing away slowly.

"What the ruddy hell do you think you're playing at mudblood. Don't you ever think you can touch me again!"

That did it.

Hermione figured he'd back off if she elicited a little force.

Watching him storm away, she wondered why he had reacted so strangely when she touched his left arm.

Maybe he...?

No.

There's no way he'd be that stupid.

Sighing, she bent down and plucked up the book that he immaturely tossed onto the floor.

Going back to studying, she thought of his sneer. How did he always manage to keep it placed so well? She had seen it slip a few times, she wondered how he would look if he actually smiled.

Her mind was wandering to some dangerous places. What would her friends say if they knew she had taken an interest in Malfoys mental state?

They'd think she had gone bloody mad.

That was it, she was bloody mad.

The morning came slowly, the dawn creeping in through her window. Blinkingly she opened her brown eyes, relishing in the warmth of the rays.

It would be a beautiful day.

In the Great Hall, she plopped herself down at the empty table, being an early bird had its perks. Most of the kids that came down for breakfast were in dreadful moods. Ron being one of them.

Searching in her satchel, she grabbed the book she was studying last night for potions. Removing her book-mark she found the place she had left off.

Draco walked the hallways, feeling his stomach protest his hunger. Yawning, he kicked at the ground, annoyed that he had lost another night of sleep.

Damn his task.

It kept him awake at nights, he was always worried, and doubtful of his capabilities to fulfill it.

He wondered if he had it in him to be a murderer.

The Great Hall was pretty much empty, save for a few Hufflepuffs, Gryffindors and Ravenclaws. His silver eyes scanned the benches, finally stopping on a bushy-haired girl.

Granger.

Of course she would be up.

Hermione was distracted suddenly by the Great Halls doors being opened. Draco Malfoy shuffled in, blowing in a cold draft in doing so.

Maybe it wasn't a draft. Maybe it was just Draco Malfoy himself.

Her brown eyes ran over him, noticing he was considerably paler today. His face seemed a little sunken in, especially below his unusual eyes.

Odd.

Exhaustion.

That was another emotion that flitted across his face. In a rush, Hermione reached into her satchel, grabbing her notebook and flipping it open to her secret page. She scribbled down this word and glanced back up at the Slytherin.

Why wasn't he sleeping?

Why was she concerned about it? She had other things in her life that needed her attention, and that spoiled brat was not one of them. No matter what, Hermione decided to only observe and to not instigate, or try to talk to him about any of this.

I mean, where would it get her anyway, did she really think that Draco Malfoy would ever open up to her?

It would be a cold day in hell.

Sighing, she shoved her notebook back in her bag and went back to reading the last chapter in the Potions book.

Ron and Harry sat beside her in Defense against the Dark Arts. They were focused on what their Professor was saying. They were on the subject of mutilating curses, which was somehow still in the curriculum.

Why would that be?

If the unforgivables weren't allowed, she figured that these would be as well. She was wrong.

The whole lesson was causing her to fidget in her chair, the uncomfortable vibe was swallowing her whole. The boys however, were completely enthralled.

They would be.

They both had intended to be aurors after school was over, they had always talked about it.

Hermione though, she didn't want to always stand in the darkness, she wanted to make a difference in the magical world, without having to put her life on the line to do so.

Halfway through class, Hermione's eyes drifted over to the Slytherin part of the room. They looked completely interested in this subject as well. Hmm, probably so they could test the spells on some unfortunate student.

Hermione felt a chill run up her spine, looking into the faces of the hefty Crabbe and Goyle.

Malfoy was also staring intently at the professor, his eyes cold and impassive, as usual.

"Alright everybody! Now that my speech giving is over, I want everybody to pair up. I want us to practice little samples of these spells."

Hermione opened her mouth, about to ask how they were supposed to do that without tearing each others limbs off. The teacher than conjured up a wooden object and flicked his wand at a small spot, making a little scratch.

Professor Warwick smiled at his example and turned to his students. "See, just a little scratch. And after, I want you all to come up to my desk and grab this ointment to erase the cut. Understood?"

The students were whispering amongst themselves, excited to practice this.

Clapping his hands, Professor Warwick got everyone's attention again.

"Now. I know most of the Gryffindors and Slytherins will pair up with members from their own houses, but unfortunately that's not what I want to happen, so I took it upon myself to pair you up."

No.

NO.

The two sides of the room turned to glare daggers at each other.

Great.

Perfect.

"Mr. Weasley, I want you with Miss Parkinson."

Ron put his head on the desk, groaning.

"Mr. Potter, I want you with Mr. Goyle."

Harry glared over at the burly teenager, now cracking his knuckles.

"Mr. Malfoy, I want you with Miss Granger."

NO!

Shooting her hand into the air, her eyes wide, she knew that this would end dreadfully.

"Yes. Miss Granger?"

"I'm sorry sir, but Malfoy and I cannot work with each other."

Malfoy glowered at her, she could feel his stare burn into her skull.

"Miss Granger, I assure you I will be keeping a very close watch on my class. Now please, take your seat by Mr. Malfoy."

She sat for a moment longer, looking at her friends horrified expressions.

She was walking to her death.

Plopping down at Malfoys desk, she scooted as far to the left as she possibly could. The blonde boy said nothing to her, just wiped the spot that she had touched beside him.

The movement did not go unnoticed by her, and she clutched her wand, itching to curse him into oblivion.

"Now that everyone is together, I want you to begin. Remember! A small cut! If anything more, I will personally see to your punishment."

The threat was called out, and all the teenagers stood, still glowering at their partners.

Hermione raised her wand, wanting to slice his stupid smirk off his features.

"On the arm!" Professor Warwick shouted to a pair of partners that were going for the face.

"You first Malfoy." She gritted out.

He smirked and held his wand up, he moved it in a slicing motion so fast, she didn't even realize there was a cut on her face until she touched the tingling sensation on her chin.

Bloody prick.

He'd regret it.

It was her turn.

She moved her wand up, slicing it in his own direction. A small incision graced his cheek, making her smile. The line was barely there, not even deep enough to draw blood, but for some reason, the cut on her chin was?

Professor Warwick came over to them, glaring.

"I thought I told you to aim at the arms. Ten points from each of your houses for not listening to instructions."

Hermione sighed, but still confused as to why his cut on her skin was deeper to that of hers on his skin.

"Professor."

He turned, looking at her.

"Why is his cut deeper than mine?"

"I'm glad you asked that Miss Granger."

Turning to his class, he started to speak. "When there is a cut that isn't so deep, one that barely breaks the skin, it means that your feelings for this person is clearly not that malicious."

Hermione felt her heart beat escalate. Draco Malfoy was now sneering in her direction, but malice was not in his eyes...she could of swore she saw a questionable emotion cross his features.

She'd have to remember to write that down.

How bloody embarrassing.

"So that's why he decided to pair us with the Slytherins." Ron said to them at lunch, his mouth full of food.

Hermione shrugged her shoulder, "I still don't believe that the curriculum allows him to let us perform those kinds of spells on each other. What if someone accidentally cuts too deeply, or severs something important?"

Harry shook his head. "There's a ward placed on the classroom when those kinds of lessons are being performed. Professor Lupin told me so in our third year."

It made sense.

"The wards don't allow any kind of extremely dangerous spell/or curse to be used."

Ron looked at him in question, "But what about Mad-Eye? Remember when he performed the unforgivables?"

Hermione scooped up a spoonful of soup, "Well, he probably took them down. He was a death-eater in disguise."

She was so glad that her friends didn't bring up the events around Malfoy's cut and why hers wasn't that deep compared to the blonde's.

She honestly didn't know why. It frightened her, maybe this little study session with his emotions was starting to get to her.

Which was not a good thing.

After the class was over, she still saw the questionable look on Malfoys features, when his eyes flicked to hers, she saw that emotion disappear, and all that was left was hatred.

What was wrong with her?

Why did she want to know what lay behind those guarded irises?

I hope everyone enjoys the story, if you like it review.

XOXO