Everyone thinks romance stories are yucky. Trust me this one is the worst but I can promise you it definitely doesn't start like that…
Eleven my alarm clock said. It felt like it was only seven am! Please god just let me sleep before….
"Ducky attack! Tear tooty apart!" My little brother screams poking me with a duck. Yes a real duck.
"Dannie! Put Samson down, let him in the garden. OUCH!" I scream as Samson (our duck) starts quaking and flapping his wings.
Finally chucking my brother and Samson out of the window (just kidding it was the door!) and I notice some boys walking past my window. Oh great, it's the twist drunk lads from down the road and they have a midget on each arm. Yes, they all have small people on one arm. Jake is the worst one of the lot! Why does he always look up my window? No he is not a paedophile, just a freak who likes catching my in the nude! Maybe that is a pervert, seeing as he his three year younger than me.
"Show us the ping –pongs! Get them out love!" Jake shouts and his midget friend stomps off.
"Jake, in your dreams! She's mine and she loves me." Mark, Jake's tall friend, says and his midget friend stomps off.
I close the window only to hear the depressing cry off boys wanting to see my ping-pongs (ladies lumps). Oh jebus I only remembered Carol was coming round. And I can hear her coming now. When my face looks like whales have swam on it and my hair looks like …..Hair.
"Lilly, I'm here with chocolate." She shouts outside my window while being attacked by Samson.
Quickly spraying myself in spray and doing basic makeup, I luckily can get away with my mess of a hair. Just a quick brush and...
"Dannie, get the duck of me! Ouch, jebus it hurts." Carol screams as she bursts in my room catching a glance of my ping-pongs, jebus.
"That never happened." I say pulling my duck protection kit on.
Carol quickly tells me the plan. Yes a plan to get a sex bomb (no it is not a bomb it is a boy).
REVIEWS PLEASE! Ideas for the plan (related to boys or love but quite funny)and more ideas…..