Set after 2x12, Damon killed Rose and shuts down completely, isolating himself from everybody including Elena. What will happen between them? Disclaimer: I do not own The Vampire Diaries.
She sighed as she sat down beside Damon, watching the flames fly around in the fireplace. She was worried about him. Ever since Rose died, he had been sitting on the same spot, drinking. He only moved when he absolutely had too, which meant when he had to get some blood or visit the bathroom.
He wasn't talking either. He had shut himself out from everything and everyone, including Elena. She felt hurt by the fact that he didn't talk to her about this, include her in his healing-process.
Elena held her hands in her lap and sighed before turning to Damon. His eyes was fixed on the flames, just like hers had been a few seconds ago. His whole face was blank, almost like a statue.
"Damon." Elena said, hoping he would look at her. But he didn't, he made no sign of listening to her. "Can you please look at me while I am talking to you?" She asked. She didn't know how many times she had been trying to talk to him, without any results. She didn't expect him to look at her this time either. Her heart was aching as Damon left her hanging.
She sighed again, turning her head back to the flames as she spoke. "Please, don't shut me out." She begged, tears was threatening in her eyes. Damon downed what was left in his glass before getting up to pour himself another one.
"What do you want me to say, Elena?" He suddenly said. Elena jumped a little, surprised he talked to her. She felt a small smile appear on her lips, even though his voice was cold as ice, he was talking to her. "Do you want me to say that I cared about Rose? Because I didn't." He shrugged. Elena knew that was a lie. She knew it was his way to handle things, it was a typical Damon-move to shut his feelings off and pretend they wasn't there.
"You know I don't believe that," Elena said as she stood up. She went over to Damon and stopped when she stood behind him. Her arms slowly crept around his waist, pulling herself closer and laid her head on his back. "Talk to me, Damon. Don't shut me out. Let me help you." She said after a moment of silence. Damon turned around and stared into Elena's eyes. His face was hard and empty.
"There is nothing to talk about, Elena. I killed her, she died in my arms. Death happens to all of us eventually." He explained, causing Elena to take a step away from him. Nothing to talk about? she thought. Another wave of pain shot to her heart, it hurt her even more that he was acting like this towards her. She wanted nothing more than for him to talk to her, make her a part of this, let her help him through all of this.
Damon sighed and clamped his nose between his fingers.
"Elena, look." He wasn't sure what he was going to tell her, but he needed to tell her something. "These couple of days has been hard," The word 'hard' was an understatement to the truth. These days had been more than hard, more than painful, more than excruciating, but he didn't want to tell Elena that. "but there is nothing to talk about. I'm fine." Damon put in the last two words so Elena would drop the subject. But he was stupid to think that he would get away with it so easily.
Elena frowned when Damon told her he was fine. A laugh bubbled up inside of her, but she managed to hold it in. A laugh wasn't really appropriate in this situation. "You are fine?" She asked. "If you think I would believe that, you are really damn stupid, Damon." She told him. "You have not spoken to me for days, you haven't done anything else but sit on that couch, getting drunk every single day. You haven't even left this house." Elena was thinking back on the past few days, on how much of a mess Damon had been, and how much it hurt her to see him like this. It had to stop.
"But I'm fine." Damon shot back at her. He hoped she would just drop the subject and move on already.
Elena sighed a few times. Anger was bulding up inside of her and she tried everything she could, not to let it out and expload on him. She wanted it so badly, though. But it would do no good. It would only make this situation worse.
"Fine." Elena said, turning around and walked towards the front door. If he was going to continue being like this, Elena wasn't going to sit around and wait for him to let her in. She knew it was selfish, but she just wouldn't do it anymore. He had his chances on telling her, making her a part of this, but he just never made his move. She was tired of it.
"Where are you going?" Damon asked her confused.
"I am going home." Elena said simply, grabbing her purce by the door. She flung it over her shoulder and put her hand on the door knob. She was hesitating for a moment, thinking maybe she wouldn't leave him alone.
"Why?" Damon argued with her. He was confused by her behaviour.
"Because I am tired of this, Damon. You don't give a crap about me in all of this. You're only thinking about yourself. You're not the only one hurting by this situation, I do too. I feel your pain. I can see how you're breaking down, and I am too, because you won't let me help you. Do you know how hard it is for me to see you like this? And when I'm trying to help you, you just ignore me and give me the silent treatment." She stopped and breathed for a moment. When she looked up at Damon, his face was twisted. She wasn't expecting to see him like this, to react the way he did.
She sighed again before she continued. "If this is how you want it, then fine. I will leave and when you're ready to come clean and include me in this; you know where to find me." Elena turned around and opened the door, waiting for a moment, hoping Damon would stop her from leaving. But he didn't. So Elena went out the door and closed it behind her. Tears began to run down her face as she went to her car.
She couldn't believe he didn't try to stop her. He didn't move at all, neither did he speak. She got in the car and drove off, taking it extra slow. It would take longer to get home, but she didn't mind.
When she got home, Elena went straight to her room, hoping nobody would call for her or come check on her. She tossed her bag on her bed and went into the bathroom. She washed up and changed into her PJ's.
When she was finished, she made her way back into her bedroom. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Damon sitting on the bench by her window. He looked devastated and by the proof of dried water, it looked as if he had been crying.
She hated to see him like this, but something inside of Elena cracked up and she was smiling on the inside. He had come to see her, which hopefully meant he was ready to include her.
She went over to her bed and sat down, waiting for Damon to speak.
His eyes were fixed on his hands and he sighed a few times before he spoke. "I'm sorry." He said, his voice cracked a little. "I'm sorry for everything. I..I just don't know what to do. These kind of emotions.. I'm just not used to it. Usually, I simply don't care. I had nothing to care for. That was my security. My hiding." He finished, but had his eyes locked on his hands still.
Elena sat frozen on her bed. This was absolutely not what she had expected, not at all. She expected him to stay like he had been for a while and shut off his feelings. And now, when he finally opened up to her, she didn't know what to say. Her mind was empty.
"Damon," She began, trying to buy herself a little time. She didn't want to ruin this moment by saying the wrong thing. She slowly got up and went over to him, grabbing his face in between her hands. "I know this is hard on you, but you can't keep shutting me out. I want you to include me in this, I want you to tell me how you feel, I want you to bring me with you in this process. I love you. I don't want to see you hurt." Secretly, Elena hoped that would be good enough and make him understand.
Damon looked in her eyes. Never in his life, had he seen something so beautiful as he did tonight. Elena's eyes were showing him a bigger love than he had ever seen before. She was smiling at him, as tears slowly ran down her face. Small, salty tears.
"I know, I shouldn't have.. I should have made you a part of this. I know that now and I'm sorry." Elena leaned in and kissed Damon carefully on his lips. It was a gentle kiss, which expressed all the love she was feeling. He relaxed into her and let his arms go around her waist, pulling her closer.
"I love you," Elena said while she broke away for air. "Promise me, you will never shut me out again. No matter what." She said seriously. She wouldn't push him to expose every emotion he was feeling, not tonight. They would still be there tomorrow. For now, Elena was happy he had come back to her and opened up as much as he did.
"I promise." Damon said before capturing her lips once again. "No matter what." He was truthful, he would never shut her out again. No matter what it was, Elena would always be a part of it. It was either everything, or nothing. And Damon had experienced 'nothing'; it wasn't something he wanted to go back to. 'Everything' sounded like a better way to go for him, and with Elena beside him, the road would be easier.
That's it. I had to write this, it was tearing me apart. Please, read & review!
