Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead, Daryl, Walkers, Biters, Zombies, Starbucks or anything else you might now. I do own Meg, Allie, Adam and my netbook that they are written on :)

See Authors note at the end for other information.

The things I miss the most about how things used to be was getting dressed up and feeling like I was a desirable woman. I couldn't even remember the last time that I had even bothered to do anything with my hair besides toss it in a ponytail or bun let alone dye it so the grays this whole thing had given me were very pronounced and don't even get me started on my nails. They were short, ragged and no matter how hard I scrubbed I swear that there was always gun oil, gun powder, dirt and god knows what else embedded under them.

Good coffee. God, how I missed Starbucks, Daryl would always call it pretentious bullshit even after I got him hooked on double strength cafe Americano.

Daryl. I've been thinking about him a lot lately, if anyone could survive the shit storm that was going on now it would be him. Hell, it was because of the stuff he and Merle taught me while we were growing up that I was even still alive and able to protect the people around me. If anyone had ever told me before that those trips in the woods were preparing me for the zombie apocalypse I would have laughed in their face.

Meg closed her journal and clipped the pen to the front cover before standing up to start the day. Keeping a journal was an old habit from before the world went to shit that she found herself keeping. It was a little snippet of normalcy in an otherwise insane world. It was the little things like that she couldn't give up, there must have been at least 50 or so notebooks that she'd kept over the past three years full of thoughts, ideas, memories and sketches. Unfortunately most of them got left behind when her group had to vacate the church they had been using as a shelter when the food and medical supplies ran too low and the walkers got too close.

In a world where each day could be your last it was nice having something to leave behind for someone else to find and learn from. It also helped her remember who she used to be before all hell broke loose.

"Mama!"

She laughed as a blonde blue eyed bundle of energy tackled her as soon as she left her room. "Mornin', Alley Cat. Were you good for Miss. Jo?"

Her four year old daughter nodded as she leaned down to pick her up, "I missed you tucking me in though, Miss. Jo doesn't do the voices in my storybook like you do."

"The voices are kind of a mommy thing, kiddo." A voice came over her shoulder and ruffled Allison's hair while he hands Meg a cup of hot tea, "That's what make them so special. Sorry it's still not coffee but with fortifying the fence no one's had a chance to try and make a town run."

Taking a sip she sighed, "I miss milk and sugar. Real milk not powdered or canned."

"Maybe on your next hunting trip you'll find a cow that escaped from a farm, Mama."

"Maybe, but where would we keep a cow?"

"Adam could build a pen for it."

"I could, huh?"

"Adam can build or fix anything in the world."

Meg couldn't help but smile as her daughters blind faith in Adam, when they had met up with him two years ago she wrapped him around her finger within the first few minutes of meeting. Over the past couple of years Meg had become the leader of their small group and he had become her rock as well as moral compass. He's the one who helped not only raise Allie but kept Meg from going down a very dark path when her sister had died a few months ago.

He had kept her sane in an insane world.

He had helped a jaded preacher's daughter find faith again in a nearly godless world, was her best friend and loved her unconditionally.

Walking along with him to the communal area to meet the others for breakfast she looked at him from the corner of her eye and think, not for the first time, that she wished she could return his feelings. But if wishes were horse's beggars would ride.

All because she was still hung up on her daughter's father, a man who didn't even know he had a child because of her stubborn pride.

A man who she didn't even know if he was alive or dead but if money still meant anything in this world she would have bet everything that he was still alive and fighting.

"Mama?"

Meg turned her full attention to her daughter's bright blue eyes that were identical to Allison's father and smiled, "Yeah, baby?"

"Miss. Jo was telling me what Christmas used to be like before the walkers came. Do you think it'll ever be like that again?"

Her mind started racing to come up with something to say, she hadn't even realized that it was the middle of December and getting closer to Christmas. Before she had a chance though Adam, jumped in and saved the situation.

"Well, kiddo everything's going to be different. It's going to take a long time after the walkers are gone before anything is going to be considered normal. While Christmas may never be what it used to be it could end up being something so much better and more meaningful because of everything that we've all been through."

"Did kids really used to believe that an old fat man came down the chimney and leave gifts and that he did it all in one night?" She asks wrinkling her noise in distaste, "How stupid could you be?"

"Things were different before the walkers came, Alley cat. Even though we lived in some pretty violent times it was still a hell of a lot more innocent then what we live in now." Meg flicked her on the nose, "An' how did you get to be so cynical, Miss. Dixon?"

"I'm not 'nical, Mama." She looks confused, "What's 'nical mean?"

Adam reached over and lifted her out of Meg's arms and swung her onto his shoulders, "Something you are way too young to be!"

Her laughter echo's through the hallway as they walk ahead of Meg who ran the tips of her fingers over the wall like she did every morning as she followed them. When they had come to this country sheriff's station a year and a half ago it was only supposed to be for a night or two and that was only because she had fallen in the woods and broken her ankle. This was just supposed to be just a quick rest stop so she could be treated.

Fate works in weird ways sometimes.

If they hadn't been forced to stop because of her injury this goldmine never would have been explored and they never would have found out that it had been abandoned early in the outbreak.

In fact it looked like people just hadn't come to work that day and no one had thought to check it out at all since.

The weapons and evidence rooms were still fully stocked.

There was still food in the vending machines.

An emergency generator with enough fuel to last a few months.

And the makings of a fence, a beautiful fence, that could be built to keep the walkers out. A fence that took a lot of blood, sweat and tears to get built but they had done it.

Stopping in the doorway of the main room of the station she leaned against it and watched the people inside of it for a few minutes and couldn't help but smile. They had made this place a home and the people within it had become family.

It hadn't been easy and they had suffered their fair share of losses but had made it this far. And all of them would keep fighting until there was nothing left to fight for.

Mean while at a prison not as far away as you would think. . .

The picture he was looking at was old, faded, stained and had been torn in half and badly taped back together at one point but it was all he had left of her. Most of the time he was too busy just trying to survive and protect everyone around him to think about her but on nights like tonight where no matter how hard he tried he couldn't sleep that he'd take out this picture and look at it.

Meghan. God, how he missed that woman. The stupidest thing he ever did was leave her that morning and by the time he realized it things were too far gone. When the outbreak hit and they started evacuating Atlanta he went looking for her but she was gone, her apartment had been ransacked and there had been no sign of where she went.

A quiet fussing noise brought him out of his thoughts and he slid the picture back into the pocket over his heart where he kept it before getting up. On nights when he couldn't sleep he ended up getting up with his little ass-kicker and just telling her random stories about growing up, hunting, fights he had with Merle and even stories about Meg while he fed her and rocked her back to sleep.

"Hey, Little Ass Kicker. Ya hungry? Give Uncle Daryl a second to change your diaper an' get your bottle set up." He spoke softly as to not wake anyone up and quickly changed her diaper. Getting her settled in the crook of his arm he makes the bottle one handed and walks back over to the perch where he sleeps. Tossing a burp cloth over his shoulder he settle's back in against his pillow and blankets watching the baby contently eat and smiles, "Meggie Jo woulda loved you. She woulda been wrapped around your little finger the first moment she saw ya."

Judith fussed for a moment when he took the bottle out of her mouth and gently placed her against his shoulder to burp her. After a couple of minutes of him patting her back she lets out a soft burp and he settles her back into his arms to eat a little bit more.

"Did I ever tell ya about the time that damn woman got me to wear a tie? Felt like I was bein' strangled the whole damn night but the smile on her face more than made up for it. It was for a showin' she was havin' of some of her paintin's after she was in that art school of hers an' she was nervous as hell because of some fancy smancy art types judgin' her work an' tryin' to say she wasn't good enough to go to that school because she was so young.

Merle teased me somethin' awful when I left the apartment that night with my hair slicked back, brand new white shirt an' jeans along with that damned black noose 'round my neck. Had my truck freshly washed an' a bunch of her favorite wildflowers ready to go on the seat beside me all the while fiddlin' with that damned tie as I drove. I swore I was gonna rip it off as soon as she saw I was wearin' it an' all the high flauntin' types could screw off for all I cared.

Once I got there I had a hell of a time parkin' my truck because there were no spaces, I musta parked about 3 blocks away an' by the time I got there the tie was already half undone an' I was cussin' up a storm about it. Then I saw her pacin' back an' forth smokin' a cigarette wearin' this black dress an' heels that woulda brought the devil to his knees an' I just stopped dead.

There comes a time in every man's life, Little Ass-kicker, when he knows whether the woman he's with is the one he wants to spend the rest of his life with or not. It's not always a big dramatic moment sometimes it's somethin' small like knowin' that they were waitin' to go into their own party just so they could go in with you. I stood there watchin' Meggie Jo pace back an' forth lookin' at her watch as she smoked an' I knew at that moment I was gonna marry her.

I was gonna spend the rest of my life with her an' just thinking that made me smile so wide. It was then she turned 'round an' saw me, without a word she dropped her smoke, ran over an' kissed me like there was no tomorrow. One thing I always loved about that girl was she didn't have to fill up the silence with a bunch of foolish nonsense, she always did let her actions speak louder than her words."

The part of the story he wasn't telling was what happened when she saw the tie, the wicked grin and spark in her eyes. How she had grabbed him by that tie and pulled his head down so she could whisper in his ear, "Let's get the hell out of here, Dixie and make it a night to remember."

A flush started up the back of his neck at some of the images that had popped up into his brain from what had ended up being their first time together. Memories that he cherished but wasn't ready to revisit right now while feeding the baby.

Standing up he saw that she had fallen asleep while eating and he studied her for a few minutes while his mind went in a different direction. What if he hadn't left that morning? Would things have worked out between them? Would they have gotten married? Would they have had any kids by the time the outbreak happened?

Would he have been able to protect his family though everything that had happened?

He blinks away some sudden moisture from his eyes as he went over and placed Judith in her make shift crib. Running his finger along her cheek he knows he would have done anything to protect the family he would have had with Meg just like he was planning on doing anything he could to make sure that this little girl got to grow up.

Even if he died trying.

Authors Note: This is also being posted over at Tumblr under Jade Siren as well. Any mistakes are my own as this is un-beta'd and sometimes things slip past me no matter how many times I read it over.

I can't remember where I read it or who came up with calling Daryl Dixie but I would like to credit them for it, lol.