-3:00am-
Kwest was awaken by the phone ringing, he didn't have to answer it to know who it was.
This was the third time he'd called in the middle of the night in the past two weeks.
He answered the phone. "Hey man" he said.
Tommy answered him with "Hey, did I wake you, I didn't relise what time it was." just like he did everytime. Kwest sighed "It's OK, what's wrong?" He asked, already knowing the problem "I don't know, I can't seem to focus on anything, ya know what I mean?"
Kwest sighed again "Don't worry Tom, everything's going be alright alright? Now just get some sleep."
Tommy was silent for a second, "I can't" Kwest frowned "Why not?" When he didn't answer Kwest thought maybe he'd hung up. "Are you there T.?"
Tommy answered him this time. "Yeah, I'm here." Kwst asked him again "Why can't you sleep?" but he knew the answer before he heard the words "Because she'll be there." Tommy said in the broken voice he only used at times like this.
Kwest ndded his head and told him it would be ok again.
Tommy finely said ok to that. "I'll see you tomorrow Kwest." Kwest wondered what tomorrow would bring for his friend "Alright Tom, try to get some sleep OK?" He hear Tommy sigh "Yeah, I'll try. Thanks Thanks man."
They hung up the phone, and Kwest knew that when he saw Tommy tomorrow, he wouldn't have gotten any sleep, because he was afraid she'd be there, waiting for him in his dreams.
-9:00am-
Tommy walked into the studio and everyone could tell he hadn't slept.
He really just looked bad, he hadn't shaved, his clothes looked like he'd had them on for a few days, he even looked a little hungover.
He just hadn't been the same since she left, and no one knew how to get through to him, it was like he just didn't care.
Everyone had told him to move on with his life, that she wasn't coming back, but nothing worked.
Sadie watched him walk to his office and sighed, it was getting worse, she had even heard him talking to himself a few days ago, he was acting like she was standing there with him.
-12:00pm-
Tommy got into his car and drove away from G-major, he had told them he was getting some lunch, but he really just needed to get out for awhile.
He found himself driving by her old place, just like he use to do, just to see if she was home, even though he knew she wouldn't be there anymore.
He stopped the car and shook his head, then he turned the car around and went back to work.
-7:00pm-
He was at home, alone again, just like he always was now. He was looking at all the pictures on the walls, they were mostly of her, either by herself or with him.
He finely couldn't take it anymore, and he got up and took them all down and put them in a box and shoved it in the back of the closet.
Then he found some letters she had writen him, along with a few songs.
He put those in a pot and burned them, watching them all go up in smoke.
-2:00am-
He was so tired, but he knew if he fell alseep she would find him, and he couldn't let that happen.
Instead he picked up the phone and started to dial her number, he got to the sixth one before he hung up, relizing she wouldn't answer.
He grabed the phone and through it aginst the wall, and fell to his knees.
He looked up at the ceiling, and cried out, begging god to please take away the pain, and make him stop hurting.
-3:30am-
He sat in the living room, just looking at the empty walls.
He kept replaying in his mind all the times people had told him that when he had said he saw her, weather it was in the grociery store, or walking down the street he was driving on, that it was all in his head, that she wasn't really there.
It had been six months since she left, it had also been six months since he had writen anything.
But suddenly he wanted to, no he needed to write.
He went to he room and found his journal and a pen, and sat down on the bed and started to write.
He thought back over everything that had happened in the last six months as his pen flew across the paper.
people say she's only in my head,
it's gonna take time but i'll forget
they say i need to get on with my life
but they don't relize
He sighed as he wrote down the last word, then he laid his journal to the side, and went to clean up the mess from the broken phone.
it's when you're dialing six numbers,
just to hang up the phone
drivin' 'cross town just to see if she's home
As he cleaned it up, he thought about Kwest, and knew he needed to tell him he was sorry for all the late night phone calls, he couldn't believe he had done that to him and Sadie.
wakin' a friend in the dead of night
just hear him say it's gonna be alright
when you find the things to do not to fall asleep
'cause you know she'll be there in your dreams
that's when she's
more then a memory
After he had the phone put back together, he went into the kitchen and rinsed out the pot he used to burn the letters in, then scrubed it out and put it away.
took a match to everything she ever wrote
watched her words go up in smoke
tore all her pictures off the wall
they ain't helpin' me at all
'cause when you're talkin' out loud
and nobody's there
you look like hell and you just don't care
When he was done with that, he went to the liquor cabnit and grabbed out all the bottels and went back to the sink, then emptied them one at a time. It was time to move on from all of this.
you're drinkin' more then you've ever drank
sinkin' down lower then you've ever sank
He leaned against the counter when he was done, and looked around, and sighed. Maybe God had answered him, maybe this was just the beginning, maybe he could finally move on now.
you find yourself fallin' down upon you knees
prayin' to god
begging him please
that's when she's more then a memory
He went to bed, and shut off the light on the side table.
He knew he would more than likely dream of her, he always did, but that was alright, she really was more than a memory to him, she had been his everything.
when you're findin' things to do not to fall asleep
'cause you knew she's waiting in your dreams
that's when she's
more then a memory
people say she's only in my head
it's gonna take time, but i'll forget
He knew he would never really forget anything, but in time, it would be easier, time would dull the pain, until he didn't feel it anymore, until he could look back on his time with her and smile, knowing that they had been happy together for awhile.
With that thought, he closed his eyes, and went to sleep, a real sleep, for the first time in months.