haha, i fianally decided to post another fic... maybe this one won't take 5 minutes to write like my other fics, though... check them out, cuz i really need reviews to know what i'll have to improve on...
oh and when i was writing this, i forgot that people can't apparate/disapparate in hogwarts
so... just imagine that voldemort has powers that allows him to apparate/disapparate anywhere he wants ok?
apologies...
******************** ANOTHER NONSENSE FIC BY NUCLEAR HAMMER!!!!*******************
Harry, Ron and Hermione were eating breakfast with the other Gryffindors.
Neville was eating bananas dipped in salt.
"Neville," asked Hermione kindly, "why are you eating your bananas with salt?"
Neville looked at Hermione as if she was a bug.
"Duh, you inferior b*tch! Would YOU eat be eating this salt all by itself?"
********************************************
Harry just saw Ron run out of Three Broomsticks.
"Why are you running?" asked Harry.
"Oh, man! Madame Rosmerta is so stupid!" said Ron.
"Why?"
"Okay, listen to this. I gave her a galleon for the mulled mead, and you know that it's only
13 sickles. And it's 17 sickles to a galleon, right? So she should have given me 4 sickles back!"
"Yeah, and?"
"She gave me 8 sickles back!" he managed to choke out, before he cracked up and begin to roll
like a dog on the floor.
"Uhh... didn't she ask for the money back, though?" asked Harry.
Ron looked at him in disgust.
"Do I look stupid, Harry? I ran for it when she was preparing the mulled mead! HAHA!"
Harry struck him with a baseball bat. "You idiot!"
**********************************************
Ron was in the hospital wing to get his tooth pulled out. One of his tooth had become loose
when Harry had hit him with the baseball bat.
"Hogwarts is now charging money for medicines and care." said Madme Pomfrey.
Ron frowned, "All right, how much?"
"Pulling a tooth out will be 3 galleons."
"3 galleons! It only takes about 2 minutes to pull a teeth out! It's too expensive!" Ron cried.
"Well... all right, I'll make it take 5 minutes for you then..."
Ron fainted.
***********************************************
It was lunch time.
"Lunch!" yelled Neville, "I'm gonna get me some salt banana!"
Justin Mcmillan suddenly complained to Harry. " Man, our house teacher is such an idiot."
"I bet she's nothing compared to our head of house." said Harry.
"What are you talking about? Sprout is the dumbest person you could ever think of."
"Mcgonagall is even f*ckin' dumber!" shouted harry.
Just then, Sprout came to Justin and said,
"Justin, I'd like to do me a favor," said Sprout as she threw him a sickle, "go to hogsmeade
and buy me a Firebolt with this sickle."
When she left, Justin and Harry laughed their eyes out.
"I told you she was an idiot." said Jusitn.
Then Mcgonagall came.
"Potter," she said, "will you go to my office and check if I'm there please? thank you."
Harry and Justin laughed their heads and asses off.
"Oh man, that was so dumb." cried Harry
"Sprout is even dumber. How does she expect me to buy a Firebolt? We don't have Hogsmeade
today! Hahaha!"
"Mcgonagall's worse. Why doesn't she use her owl to check if she's in her office? She just
doesn't think."
***********************************************
Dumbledore and Mcgonagall was talking Dumbledore's office.
"Albus, I think some students have found out that we have... you know... every day..."
"Don't worry, Minerva, one memory charm will finish everyhing."
"Oh, all righ- AHHHHHHHHHH!"
Voldemort suddenly lept into the office from thin air.
Dumbledore shouted, "You cannot kill me, for I'm~"
"Shut the f*** up! I'm not interested in you. I'm only interested in all your stuff."
He drew a circle with his wand on the floor.
"You too stay in there until I finish stealing all your stuff." said Voldemort.
Voldemort took every single furniture and gold in his room and left.
Then, suddenly Dumbledore started laughing like a lunatic.
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!"
"Why the hell are you so happy, you lump of lard!" shouted Mcgonagall.
Dumbledore paused laughing for a period enough to say;
"He didn't notice that one of my foot was outside of the circle all this time! Hahaha!"
5 minutes later, Mcgonagall alone left Dumbledore's office, carrying a spiked club smashed
with guts and blood.
*****************************************
"Wake up." said Madame Pomfrey, as she shaked the peacefully sleeping Ron roughly.
"What is it?" Ron asked. "Why did you wake me, I was having a pleasent dream, you b*tch!"
"It's time to take your sleeping potion, Ron." said Pomfrey.
Ron fainted again, before saying, "This fic sux. Why are you making everyone stupid, we're
not mental, maybe you are, but we're not!
Moi: I AM mental. I'm always mental when I'm writing fics.
*****************************************
pleeze r/r, tell me if it's good or bad! I NEED REVIEWS!
oh and when i was writing this, i forgot that people can't apparate/disapparate in hogwarts
so... just imagine that voldemort has powers that allows him to apparate/disapparate anywhere he wants ok?
apologies...
******************** ANOTHER NONSENSE FIC BY NUCLEAR HAMMER!!!!*******************
Harry, Ron and Hermione were eating breakfast with the other Gryffindors.
Neville was eating bananas dipped in salt.
"Neville," asked Hermione kindly, "why are you eating your bananas with salt?"
Neville looked at Hermione as if she was a bug.
"Duh, you inferior b*tch! Would YOU eat be eating this salt all by itself?"
********************************************
Harry just saw Ron run out of Three Broomsticks.
"Why are you running?" asked Harry.
"Oh, man! Madame Rosmerta is so stupid!" said Ron.
"Why?"
"Okay, listen to this. I gave her a galleon for the mulled mead, and you know that it's only
13 sickles. And it's 17 sickles to a galleon, right? So she should have given me 4 sickles back!"
"Yeah, and?"
"She gave me 8 sickles back!" he managed to choke out, before he cracked up and begin to roll
like a dog on the floor.
"Uhh... didn't she ask for the money back, though?" asked Harry.
Ron looked at him in disgust.
"Do I look stupid, Harry? I ran for it when she was preparing the mulled mead! HAHA!"
Harry struck him with a baseball bat. "You idiot!"
**********************************************
Ron was in the hospital wing to get his tooth pulled out. One of his tooth had become loose
when Harry had hit him with the baseball bat.
"Hogwarts is now charging money for medicines and care." said Madme Pomfrey.
Ron frowned, "All right, how much?"
"Pulling a tooth out will be 3 galleons."
"3 galleons! It only takes about 2 minutes to pull a teeth out! It's too expensive!" Ron cried.
"Well... all right, I'll make it take 5 minutes for you then..."
Ron fainted.
***********************************************
It was lunch time.
"Lunch!" yelled Neville, "I'm gonna get me some salt banana!"
Justin Mcmillan suddenly complained to Harry. " Man, our house teacher is such an idiot."
"I bet she's nothing compared to our head of house." said Harry.
"What are you talking about? Sprout is the dumbest person you could ever think of."
"Mcgonagall is even f*ckin' dumber!" shouted harry.
Just then, Sprout came to Justin and said,
"Justin, I'd like to do me a favor," said Sprout as she threw him a sickle, "go to hogsmeade
and buy me a Firebolt with this sickle."
When she left, Justin and Harry laughed their eyes out.
"I told you she was an idiot." said Jusitn.
Then Mcgonagall came.
"Potter," she said, "will you go to my office and check if I'm there please? thank you."
Harry and Justin laughed their heads and asses off.
"Oh man, that was so dumb." cried Harry
"Sprout is even dumber. How does she expect me to buy a Firebolt? We don't have Hogsmeade
today! Hahaha!"
"Mcgonagall's worse. Why doesn't she use her owl to check if she's in her office? She just
doesn't think."
***********************************************
Dumbledore and Mcgonagall was talking Dumbledore's office.
"Albus, I think some students have found out that we have... you know... every day..."
"Don't worry, Minerva, one memory charm will finish everyhing."
"Oh, all righ- AHHHHHHHHHH!"
Voldemort suddenly lept into the office from thin air.
Dumbledore shouted, "You cannot kill me, for I'm~"
"Shut the f*** up! I'm not interested in you. I'm only interested in all your stuff."
He drew a circle with his wand on the floor.
"You too stay in there until I finish stealing all your stuff." said Voldemort.
Voldemort took every single furniture and gold in his room and left.
Then, suddenly Dumbledore started laughing like a lunatic.
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!"
"Why the hell are you so happy, you lump of lard!" shouted Mcgonagall.
Dumbledore paused laughing for a period enough to say;
"He didn't notice that one of my foot was outside of the circle all this time! Hahaha!"
5 minutes later, Mcgonagall alone left Dumbledore's office, carrying a spiked club smashed
with guts and blood.
*****************************************
"Wake up." said Madame Pomfrey, as she shaked the peacefully sleeping Ron roughly.
"What is it?" Ron asked. "Why did you wake me, I was having a pleasent dream, you b*tch!"
"It's time to take your sleeping potion, Ron." said Pomfrey.
Ron fainted again, before saying, "This fic sux. Why are you making everyone stupid, we're
not mental, maybe you are, but we're not!
Moi: I AM mental. I'm always mental when I'm writing fics.
*****************************************
pleeze r/r, tell me if it's good or bad! I NEED REVIEWS!