Author's Note: Just a cute little story that came into my head; I needed just a quick break from writing my Lord of the Rings fanfiction epic, "Boromir, Thou Shall Live". I wanted to try writing a more 'modern' story and since there aren't too many "Sue Thomas F.B.Eye" fics… plus all stories seem to be mostly Jack/Sue stories, so I wanted to write more about one of my favorite members of the team, Myles Leland. Enjoy!

Prank Gone Good

By pmochizuki

Myles looked at the sign above the door with more than a little trepidation. O'Malleys… How original. For what seemed like the hundredth time since leaving the bullpen that afternoon, he wondered if it was all worth it.

He shrugged. A Leland never backed out on his word and he wasn't about to do that. Besides, this was business, purely business…

Opening the door into the restaurant, Myles observed that the establishment was larger and quite a bit upper scale than he would have surmised from the entrance and the name of the place. The whole eating area was carpeted except for the steps and the raised platform for the bar which was done in a mahogany wood finish. Myles appreciated the color tones of rich greens, wood brown, and somber black.

His perusal of the restaurant was interrupted by the maitre d'. "May I take your coat, sir?"

Myles took off his trench coat and handed it to the hands of the waiter. Murmuring a thank you, Myles automatically straightened his tie as the maitre d' addressed him again. "Do you have a reservation?"

"I'm a bit early but I have a reservation for a table for two under the name of Leland."

"We already have the table ready if you wish to be seated now."

Glancing at his watch and seeing that he had plenty of time before his date with destiny, Myles pointed to the bar. "I'll be over there. Could you inform me when the other member of my party arrives?"

"Understood."

Going across the room, Myles lightly went up the steps onto the bar platform. None of the stools were occupied so he took the one with a good view of the entrance to the restaurant. As he waited for the bartender to come for him, Myles took a look at the clock on the wall. 7:52…

"What will you have?" Myles saw with mild surprise the bartender to be a red headed waitress. He returned her smile with one of his own.

"Campari Soda, please."

While she started getting his drink ready, Myles checked the clock on the wall once more. 7:53…

"Date?"

Myles was startled by the question directed at him. "Excuse me?"

The red head smiled and gestured at the clock. "You keep peering at the clock. Either you're late or your date stood you up."

Grimacing, Myles took a sip from his glass before answering. "I'm early."

"May I hazard a guess that this is some sort of blind date?"

Instead of being annoyed with her 'interrogation', Myles was pleasantly amused by the woman. "Are you always this talkative and questioning to perfect strangers?"

She winked and raised her hands in the air. "I'm the bartender! It's my job to be talkative."

"I bet you solve a lot of people's problems behind this counter," Myles said, saluting her with his glass.

"Aye, that I do."

Curiosity piqued, Myles read her name tag. "Ann O'Malley. Any relation to the owner of this – ?"

"Me dad, a regul'r Irishman," she said, putting on a thick Irish accent.

"Ann O'Malley, a bartender with a last name; highly unusual," the FBI agent remarked dryly.

Ann laughed. "So, you haven't answered my question. Blind date?"

"Not exactly." Myles found himself telling her all about it. "My co-worker had a business date today, but couldn't make it due to an appointment. He promised me I would love her so…" Myles spread his arms out wide, giving her a crooked grin. "Here I am."

Well, that was part of the truth. The fact was, Bobby's informant had arranged a meeting for her to pass along some information. Information to do with one of the F.B.I's cases. Of course he couldn't tell this to Anne. Bobby couldn't make it and neither could Jack, so the task had fallen upon Myles. A simple job; have dinner with the informant, get the information needed, then get out…

Raising an eyebrow, Ann remarked dubiously, "You don't seem incredibly happy to be here."

Myles shrugged. "I'm the type of person who likes to know what he's getting himself into."

"But you still agreed to come."

"Anything to help out a co-worker." Especially when it's F.B.I. business… 7:56…

At that moment, another customer took a seat at the bar and Ann went back to work. For a few minutes, Myles finished his drink off, quietly counting those minutes until he heard a commotion at the door. His sixth sense sending an alert through his mind, Myles almost choked as he saw the woman standing at the entrance of the restaurant, speaking to the maitre d'. A sense of doom came over him… he just knew this was Bobby's 'friend'.

And sure enough, the headwaiter began to walk towards him, all the while Myles staring at his date with disgust. Disgust with himself for ever agreeing to come.

Sighing, Myles pushed himself off of his seat. Was it his imagination or did Ann call out 'good luck' to him? Well, he was going to need it. Just get through tonight…

Bobby and Jack were going to pay big time. Yes, Bobby and Jack. Why did they both have to be conveniently busy tonight of all nights?

Myles fought to keep his temper in check. For the past half hour he had been very obviously been hinting for the dinner to end and get down to business. But Lana was either enjoying his company…. or was extremely stupid. And Myles rather though it was the latter.

The information had better be worth it…

Lana finally ate the last bite of her meal as Myles tried to remember all of Bobby's words.

She's definitely a looker, mate! The type who you can't help notice walking down the sidewalk.

Yeah, especially when she's six feet tall and a very 'full' 180 pounds. Especially when she's wearing clothes two sizes too small…

Her eyes, beauuutiful green eyes this Lana has!

What eyes? Any facial features were hidden behind ten pounds of make-up. Myles still couldn't believe lips could be that red…

Did I tell you she takes singing lessons? A regular nightingale.

Is that so… Myles wondered if Bobby had ever heard her laughing. Hyena's laughter sounded more naturally than Lana's cackling. And her New York accent…

And the best part of it, mate, is her sense of humor and wit. She's done so much and experienced a lot you know. A great informant.

"And then I told the woman behind the counter, I would never pay $10 for something I could pick up for a buck and a quarter at Wallmart!" Lana laughed, and Myles rubbed his temples, willing the headache to subside.

Maybe he could try hinting for her to pass along the information once more…

"Listen Myles," Lana said after she finished laughing her 'hyena' laugh. "I need to be going in a few minutes…"

Wonderful!

"But for you, babe, I'd stay for another drink," Lana finished with a wink.

Must be firm, Leland, must be firm… "On one condition: that we get down to business."

Lana rolled her eyes. "You keep sayin' that! You remind me of this one guy I knew who – "

Myles tuned her out. She just wouldn't take a hint!

Suddenly, he needed a break from his companion. He stood up, fully knowing he was being just a tad bit rude to interrupt someone in the midst of talking.

"I'll go to the bar myself to get drinks. What'll you have?"

A little miffed at her interruption, Lana pouted though Myles could tell the word drinks had quite caught her attention. "Martini, but – "

"Great!" Myles put on a big fake smile and turned to head for the bar, losing the smile as soon as Lana's face didn't loom in view anymore. F.B.I. business… sure…

The bar was mostly full by that time with two bartenders working the counter, one of them Anne. She noticed the F.B.I agent and flashed him a smile. "I have a few more orders to fill out if you're willing to wait."

Oh, you don't know how much I'm willing to wait. "Take your time. Please."

Anne raised an eyebrow then seemed to look in the direction of Myles table and his waiting companion. A ghost of a smile flickered across her features before she went back to work.

Just then, an older man in a business seated on one of the stools caught Myles gaze and beckoned him over. Curious at the invitation, Myles sat next to the man who looked at with a mournful gaze. "I totally sympathize with you young man. How did you get stuck with the hag lady?"

Did everyone have to notice my date? Myles smiled crookedly and without humor. "Business."

The man sighed and patted Myles on the back before going back to his drink.

Anne came over and Myles ordered a Campari Soda and martini. She mixed the drinks with quick efficiency as she struck up a conversation. "I hope you're having a pleasant evening, sir."

"Oh, yes I am," Myles answered back in a conversational tone, though with an underlying sarcasm. "Pleasant and productive. I've thought of eight possible ways to murder my co-workers; disguised in such a way of course that even the F.B.I. would label it as an unfortunate accident."

The red head threw her head back and laughed, so different from Lana's incessant and annoying cackling. Myles found himself thinking of what else he could say to make this young woman laugh some more…

Unfortunately, Myles had no more reason to stay as she placed his drinks in front of him and gave him a wink. "Enjoy the rest of your time here!"

Myles could give her a weak smile before leaving to face Lana once more. She was checking her make-up in a compact mirror though Myles could not for the life of him figure out what more needed to be put on her face. She flashed him a grin as she accepted the offered martini. "Cheers!"

Sitting down, Myles was all ready to get this meeting over with. "Let's get down to business."

Lana pursed her lips. "What business."

"Why…" Myles wondered how dense this woman could be, "the business considering why this meeting was set up."

The woman's eyes widened. "What on earth are you talking about?"

Sighing, Myles decided to use very small words for obviously this woman couldn't handle complicated sentences. "I was informed you would have some information for my bureau. On the Lorenzo case."

Lana blinked several times before she started howling, causing Myles to wince while at the same time grip his glass in frustration. What has gotten into her?

Finally calming down, Lana wiped the tears from her eyes and lowered her voice as she said, "You F.B.I. agents don't communicate well, do you? I've already had my meeting with Agent Manning two days ago on the Lorenzo case!"

Not fully comprehending what she was saying, Myles tried to sort everything out. "You mean… you and Bobby already…"

She reached out and patted Myles hand. "That's right, babe. Snitched on a former acquaintance of mine who has connections to Lorenzo. Manning told me they're preparin' a strike at the end of this week thanks to my very reliable information."

"So… tonight… What is tonight?"

Lana furrowed her eyebrows. "Well, Bobby told me a friend of his, you, wanted to meet me. I thought, why not? I've been on my fair share of blind dates, and the honor of datin' an F.B.I. agent was certainly not an opportunity to be missed."

With blinding clarity, Myles realized he had been set up. This wasn't a business meeting, this was a date, at least on her side!

Only Bobby would think up this sort of sick prank.

Wait till I get my hand on that Aussie, no good, sorry excuse for a –

"Myles?"

Meeting Lana's eyes, Myles saw that she was looking at him with giddy amusement. "Listen, I wanna thank you for a nice evenin'. Unfortunately, I have to be going on my way."

Still very angry at Bobby, and Jack who was probably involved in some way, Myles could only nod and reply automatically, "It was nice meeting you."

Lana smirked. "Hey, now, I'm not as stupid as I make out. I didn't survive the streets with only luck, though I've been pretty lucky I guess." She tapped her head. "Street smarts, intuits, and the ability to appear dumber than I am. I hope your evening hasn't been too boring."

Realizing just how much he had underestimated her, Myles looked away embarrassed. "You weren't what I expected."

"Hey, I completely understand. I like fooling people with my act." She stood up as did Myles. "Now I really gotta go, else I'll be late in meeting DJ." She emphasized the name by wiggling her eyebrows.

Myles looked at her with surprise. "You don't mean – " He knew of only one DJ who would earn such a pointed look from her. DJ Harrison, master lockpick who had a pension of handling big jobs for big time crooks…

Lana smirked. "Fortunately for me, DJ likes his girls as dumb as they get." Reaching into her purse, she stuck a stick of gum into her mouth. Chewing the gum, she struck a pose. "Do I look as dumb as they get?"

Not answering, the F.B.I. agent stuck out a hand. "It was really nice to meet you."

Taking the hand in a firm grip, Lana smiled; a smile which seem more real than any expression she had showed him that whole afternoon. "See ya around, Myles." Spinning on her heel, sashaying her hips she left the restaurant.

Myles sat back down, shaking his head. This was the last time he was going to underestimate anybody on such a large scale. Lana wasn't his type, but Myles decided she wasn't that bad.

However, Bobby and Jack were still going to pay for having set him up. Why did they forever torment him and get him into such predicaments?

The waiter arrived with the check, and Myles paid for the meal. As he stood up to leave, he found himself wanting to say good bye to Anne.

The bar was now completely full. Luckily, someone was just leaving so that Myles could squeeze into a corner seat. Anne came to serve him, looking at him in surprise to see him there. "Back again?" she queried.

"Obviously," Myles said, gesturing to himself.

"Your date leave alone?"

"You seem very interested in my affairs, even for a bartender," he teased.

Surprised to see Anne blush and look away, Myles tried to alleviate whatever discomfort he had given her. "She had to leave. I was just about to go myself."

She nodded just as someone called out to her. "Could you wait a minute?" she asked, already starting to move away.

"Sure, no problem."

As she mixed some drinks, Myles casually cast his gaze over her, for the first time taking a good look at her. She was extremely pretty with her wavy locks of red hair and green eyes. As she turned her back to him, he fully appreciated how her clothes displayed her slim figure to perfection. The halter top vest over her crisp white blouse fit her trim waist well; the black slacks showing off long legs…

"Like what you see?"

Realizing he had been caught blatantly staring at the woman's figure, Myles faced the man sitting next to him. Thinking it better to be truthful, Myles smiled. "Mmm…"

The man laughed and enthusiastically pounded Myles on the back. "I've been coming to this here bar for several years, I've seen my share of men looking at dear Anne with the same look."

Making sure no one was listening, the man leaned over to whisper conspiratorially into Myles' ear. "Anne's not seeing anyone, if you get my drift."

Trying not to seem as interested as he really was, Myles only said, "Oh?"

Anne chose that moment to come over to their side of the bar, hands on her hips. "All right, Uncle Alan, what have you been telling him?"

The man obviously named Alan, shrugged innocently. "Nothing, nothing."

"Well, actually…" Myles cleared his throat, wondering if he was going to be just a bit too forward. "When do you get off work?"

Anne looked taken aback but Alan was the one who answered for her. "She gets off anytime she wants to; her dad owns the place you know."

"Perfect!" Myles wished the man would shut up for the next question. "Would you like to have dinner with me?"

"You already had dinner," she pointed out, though he detected a spark in her eyes.

"I can't really count that as dinner, I hardly ate."

"I don't even know your name."

"Well, let fix that." Myles stood up and offered his hand. "Myles Leland the Third, at your service."

Anne didn't say a word for a few moments, and Myles wondered if she wouldn't accept. But suddenly, the woman smiled and shook his hand. "A pleasure to meet you. I accept your dinner invitation. Give me a few minutes to get ready."

"I think you look great just the way you are now," he said truthfully.

"Hmm… flatterer." Anne winked and left the bar after whispering a few words into the other bartender's ear. The bartender gave Myles a strange look but otherwise didn't remark.

Great going, Leland! Perhaps the evening wouldn't be a total waste. Myles couldn't wait until Bobby and Jack realized that their prank had actually turned out to be the perfect night for Myles.

Author's Note: So, what do you think? I'll write an epilogue for the story where Bobby and Jack find out about Myles' night.