CATORADE
Tori: cat what do you think of me?
Cat: you have the best cheekbones in the whole world!
Tori: aww that's so sweet! What about you Jade?
Jade: you're good in bed.
Cat: ...
Tori: gdjfkahshdhjskdk!
Tori: hey Jade I have a knock knock joke!
Jade: cat can I have some of your bibbles?
Cat: oh sure!
Jade: *stuffs bibble in ears* what was that babe?
Tori: …
Tori: where are you going cat?
Cat: Robbie and I are going to a parade tonight!
Tori: aww I wish I can come.
Jade: oh don't worry cause you will tonight *winks*
Tori: gdjshldhhaksdasdjkh!
Meanwhile on the slap:
Tori: Guys! I have a new knock knock joke! Knock Knock!
*Andre Harris left the group*
*Robbie Shapiro left the group*
*Beck Oliver left the group*
Cat: who's there?
Tori: nana!
Cat: nana who?
Tori: nana your business! Hahaha!
Cat: oh I have one too! Knock Knock!
Tori: who's there?
Cat: cows go!
Tori: cows go who?
Cat: no! Cows go moo!
Tori: Hahaha!
Jade: can you guys shut up? Your jokes aren't even funny.
Tori: you can't even crack a joke!
Cat: yeah…
Jade: wanna hear three jokes?
Tori: sure!
Cat: kk!
Jade: joke joke joke
Tori: …
Cat: …
Tori and Cat: Ahahaha!
Tori: welcome to the club babe!
Cat: yeah! You should be our leader.
Jade: no thanks ladies, I think I'll pass.
Tori: Jade can you hand me that sugar?
Cat: did somebody said tori? Cause she's as sweet as a sugar!
Tori: Hahaha!
Jade: 3… 2… 1…
Cat: that was a joke!
Tori: ...
Tori: Jade! Baby! I want to watch Andre's performance tonight! Wanna come with me?
Cat: Oh my god im going to watch him too! Let's go together!
Tori: Sure!
Jade: … OH...
Jade: I love the scissoring so much.
Tori: you say that every time we rewatch this movie.
Cat: It's tiring…
Jade: … OH…
Jade: you know you'd be a pretty good dancer except for two things.
Tori: what are those things?
Jade: your feet.
Tori: …
Cat: don't worry tori! I think you're a good dancer!
Tori: aww thanks that's so sweet. –Hugs cat-
Jade: 3… 2… 1…
Cat: -squeals- that was a joke! You're an awful dancer!
Tori: …
Tori: hey cat! Why are you crying?
Cat: the elephant died!
Tori: oh is it one of your pets?
Cat: no!
Jade: then why the chizz are you crying?
Cat: cause im digging its grave!
Tori: …
Jade: … OH…
xXx
Tori: are you having trouble making decisions?
Cat: well… yes and no.
Jade: what do you mean?
Cat: maybe.
Tori: ...
Jade: … oh my god
Cat: Jade! Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
Jade: sure…
Cat: White horses fell into the mud!
Tori: Hahahaha!
Jade: ...
Cat: my math teacher is crazy!
Tori: why?
Cat: well yesterday she told us that five is equal to 4+1, but today she is telling us that five is equal to 3+2! Some people aren't so smart huh?
Tori: …
Jade: … oh my god
Jade: why are you wiping the floor with that cake?
Cat: well tori said it's a sponge cake, isn't it?
Tori: …
Jade: … oh my god
Cat: I think I should stay away from you…
Tori: why?
Cat: *whispers* it's not safe…
Tori: not safe? From who-
Jade: Cat! Have you seen my scissors?
Jade: why's she running?
Tori: Jade I have something to tell you…
Jade: I have something to tell you too…
Tori and Jade: I…
Cat: OH MY GOD *faints*
CADE
Cat: hey Jade! How much do you love tori?
Jade: I love her more than my scissors…
Cat: oh my god tori just gave me a bag of bibbles! I love you!
Jade: WHAT?
Cat: I love U! The vowel!
Cat: you're lucky to have tori.
Jade: are you kidding me? Im blessed to have tori.
Meanwhile on the imessage:
Jade: hey cat! Me and tori are going to nozzu's tonight. Wanna come with us?
Cat: tori and I…
Jade: what?
Cat: your sentence, it's supposed to be tori and I, not me and tori…
Jade: oh you're right. Tori and I, cause you're no longer invited.
Jade sees a picture of cat hugging tori:
Jade: hey cat! Knock knock!
Cat: who's there?
Jade: SCISSORS…
Cat: …
Jade: that's right you ain't hugging my tori again.
Cat: Jade! Whenever I drink my cup of tea, my left eye always hurts!
Jade: how about you try removing the spoon on your tea first before drinking it.
Cat: oh yay! It worked! You're a genius!
Jade: … oh my god.
xXx
Cat: Jade, what's an idiot?
Jade: an idiot is a person who tries to explain his or her ideas in such a strange and long way that the other person who is listening to him or her can't understand anything that he or she is saying. Do you understand?
Cat: … no.
Jade: exactly.
Cat: Jade what will happen if the third war takes place in United States?
Jade: we'll have one more addition chapter in our history book.
Cat: …
Jade: hey cat! Have you given the goldfish some fresh new water?
Cat: no cause they haven't finished the water that I gave to them last week.
Jade:
Cat:
Jade: … oh my god
Cat: Jade!
Jade: what?
Cat: do you know where I can find the 'any' key button on the keyboard? I can't find it anywhere.
Jade: what?
Cat: look.
-Press any key to continue-
Jade: … oh my god
Cat: tor-
Jade: yes?
Cat: oh I said tor-
Jade: yes?
Cat: but you're not tor-
Jade: yES?
Jade: Cat! I told you to accompany tori and keep her away from beck while im away!
Cat: But I do!
Jade: then why do I see beck getting close to her?
Cat: I don't see anything like that!
Jade: that's because when you're busy flirting with your boyfriend Robbie! You can't see the people around you anymore!
Cat: well maybe that's true and maybe that's your karma. Now suffer seeing tori with beck bye.
CORI
Cat: sikowitz! Can I go to the bathroom?
Tori: no cat! It's MAY I go to the bathroom?
Cat: but I asked first!
Tori: ...
Cat: tori, can I have two pieces of cake?
Tori: sure. Take this piece and cut it in two.
Cat:
Tori:
Cat: …
Cat: I lost my dog!
Tori: have you tried putting a message on the internet?
Cat: don't be silly tori! My dog never reads e-mails!
Tori: ...
Cat: tori! I just knocked over the ladder in the backyard!
Tori: oh… well you should tell Jade.
Cat: She knows! She's hanging from the roof now!
Tori: cat, how do you spell "crocodile"?
Cat: K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L
Tori: but that's wrong.
Cat: maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
Tori:
Cat:
Tori: …
Cat: hey Jade is-
Tori: hot
Cat: no I meant she's-
Tori: HOT
Cat: actually I was going to say she's-
Tori: VERY HOT!
Cat: …
Tori: look there's a dead bird!
Cat: *looks up* where? WHERE?
Tori: ... oh my god
Meanwhile on imessage:
Cat: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?
Tori: I Don't Know, Love You, Talk To You Later.
Cat: okay bye, I will ask Jade.
Tori: …
WITH SIKOWITZ
Jade: sikowitz! Will you punish me for something that I didn't do?
Sikowitz: no… and why is that?
Jade: good cause I didn't do my homework.
Sikowitz:
Jade:
Sikowitz: ... well...
xXx
Sikowitz: cat… give me a sentence that starts with the letter "I"
Cat: I is the-
Sikowitz: stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Cat: kk. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet!
Tori:
Jade:
Cat:
Sikowitz: ... well...
Sikowitz: right here in the board we have the whole map of the world… Now cat can you please locate and point out where we can find the North America.
Cat: kk. *she stood up and pointed the North America on the blackboard*
Sikowitz: very good… now Jade… can you please tell us who founded the North America?
Jade: ... cat did.
Cat:
Sikowitz: ... well...
xXx
Sikowitz: so Jade… why are you late?
Jade: because of the sign.
Sikowitz: what sign?
Jade: the one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
Sikowitz:
Jade:
Sikowitz: ... well...
JADE
Meanwhile on a restaurant:
Jade: I would like to have a plate of rice and a piece of fried chicken and a cup of coffee.
Waitress: Is that all ma'am?
Jade: what? Do you think I can't buy more?!
Somebody knocks on the door:
Jade: who is there?
Police: the police?
Jade: what do you want?
Police: we want to talk.
Jade: how many of you are there?
Police: two.
Jade: then talk to each other.
Police: …
Meanwhile on a restaurant:
Waiter: sorry ma'am! Have I been keeping you long?
Jade: no... but did you know that there are 54,367 tiles on the roof?!
Jori on a restaurant:
Waiter: would you like a table?
Jade: No, not at all, we came here to eat on the floor, carpet for two please.
Jade while shopping:
Cashier: are you going to buy these?
Jade: no, im going to steal them. I just wanted to show you first.
Jade on a shop:
Cashier: can I help you?
Jade: No. I just waited in the line for 30 minutes to say hi.
OTHERS
Meanwhile Cat on the library:
Cat: can I have burger and fries?
Librarian: sorry, this is a library.
Cat: oh right sorry *whispers* can I have burger and fries?
Librarian: ...
Beck: oh I was born in California
Tori: oh really? which part?
Beck: ... all of me.
Tori: …
Rex: do you know the way to the zoo?
Trina: oh no sorry but I don't.
Rex: well, its two blocks this way, then one block to the left.
Robbie: REX!
Trina: john says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly. What do you think, Tori?
Tori: …
Jade: I think you're pretty ugly.
Tori: pffffttttt….
Trina: …
Robbie: may I hold your hand?
Cat: no thanks, it isn't heavy.
Robbie: ...
Trina: If we become engaged will you give me a ring?
Beck: sure what's your phone number?
Trina: …
Tori: beck do you feel the same thing?
Beck: what kind of thing?
Tori: this *grabs beck's hand and placed it on her chest* do you feel it?
Beck: tori… I-I do…
Tori: I knew it… *leans in*
Jade: NOOOOO!
Jade: …
Jade: thank god it was only a dream…
Jade:
Jade: beck…
Jade: IM GOING TO KILL THAT CANADIAN!
Beck: Jade, remember when you gave me your old phone?
Jade: yes?
Beck: well… I was playing around with it right?
Jade: yeah?
Beck: … nice pictures of tori.
Jade: shit…
JORI
Tori: "I can't live without you."
Jade: I know babe.
Tori: "you're the best girl that I've ever met."
Jade: I already know that babe.
Tori: "im so lucky to have you, I love you so much."
Jade: I love you too baby.
Tori: those were the last lines that I heard from the movie that I watched last night. The ending is so sad it made me cry…
Jade: … OH.
Tori: I wasn't even that drunk!
Jade: oh yeah sure. You just picked up every rock on our way home and yelled "where are you Patrick star!"
Jade: baby let's get you home you're drunk!
Tori: I swear to drunk im not god! But seriously, stay in drugs, eat school and do vegetables.
Tori: hey Jade! I have a knock knock joke for you!
Jade: urrrgghhhh!
Tori: knock knock
Jade: who's there?
Tori: olive!
Jade: *sighs* olive who?
Tori: olive you –kisses-
Tori: I want to dance like this forever…
Jade: don't you ever want to improve?
Tori:
Jade:
Tori:
Jade:
Tori: ... gank.
Jade: the stars look so beautiful tonight.
Tori: yeah…
Jade: wanna know who else is beautiful tonight?
Tori: *blushes* who?
Jade: me.
Tori: …
Jade: I wasn't even that drunk last night!
Tori: you were laughing and watching television.
Jade: so?
Tori: the television wasn't even on.
Tori: I bet you can't say the alphabet faster than me.
Jade: oh really? Well let's see A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-
Tori: the alphabet!
Jade:
Tori:
Jade:
Tori:
Jade: … you ain't getting some tonight.
Jori teaching their baby to walk:
Jade: C'mere… ok… don't fall don't fall! … FUCK!
Tori: I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING SWEAR INFRONT OF OUR CHILD.
CHEESY JORI
Tori: what would you do if I break up with you?
Jade: get back with my ex.
Tori: now I see how much you care. I'm done.
Jade: *looks at tori* hey, you wanna go out?
Tori: go with your ex.
Jade: you are my ex.
Tori:
Jade:
Tori: … gurl.
Tori: I wish I was water and you were a fish.
Jade: *looks at tori* why?
Tori: so you wouldn't be able to live without me.
Jade:
Tori:
Jade: … gurl.
Tori: Jade…
Jade: yep.
Tori: what's the first thing that you notice when you look at another girl?
Jade: *thinks for a while* she's not you.
Tori:
Jade:
Tori:
Jade:
Tori: … gurl.
Tori: baby I love you.
Jade: I love you too babe.
Tori: prove it. Scream it to the world.
Jade: *whispers in her ear* I love you.
Tori: why'd you whisper it to me?
Jade: because you are my world.
Tori:
Jade:
Tori: … gurl.
Jade: *looks at tori*
Tori: stop looking at me.
Jade: why?
Tori: every time I see you, you take my breath away. And I need to breathe sometime.
Jade:
Tori:
Jade: … gurl.
JANDRE
Andre: I am being slowly seduced with your eyes.
Jade: I know, that was my plan.
Andre:
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: you look amazing today wow…
Jade: you look amazing… wow - there i fixed your sentence.
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: oh… so you are from-
Jade: the land of the not interested.
Andre:
Jade:
Andre:
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: so who was your favorite character in titanic?
Jade:
Andre:
Jade: … the iceberg.
Andre:
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: how about you go out with me this weekend?
Jade: no i can't I'll be having headaches this weekend.
Jade:
Andre:
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: you're so mean and rude.
Jade: yeah but you like me anyway.
Andre:
Jade:
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: do you want coffee?
Jade: no.
Andre: umm.. What about pizza?
Jade: no.
Andre: well… I guess im leaving.
Jade: bye.
Andre: … Bye.
Jade: wait i forgot to tell you something.
Andre: what?
Jade: … I like you.
Andre: … dang gurl.
Andre: wanna hear a joke?
Jade: no.
Andre: knock knock.
Jade: ugh. Who's there?
Andre: marry.
Jade: marry who?
Andre: marry me?
Jade: … bro.
Andre: can i borrow a pen?
Jade: yeah.
Andre: oh but it doesn't work.
Jade: what?
Andre: i wrote my name but it doesn't have an ink.
Jade: it works i used it.
Andre: really? Then can you write your number here and see if it works?
Jade: … bro.
JADE VS HAILEY AND TERA
Tera: I'd slap you, but I don't want to get slut on my hand.
Jade: Why not? You already have it all over your outfit.
Tori: … gurl.
Hailey: Is that your face? Or did your neck just throw up?
Jade: Couldn't help it. One look at you and I started to vomit.
Tori: … gurl.
Tera: I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap a better argument than yours.
Jade: Well it would be a nice change from all the crap that's been coming out of your mouth.
Tori: … gurl.
Jade: you really are as pretty as a picture.
Tera: it's about time that you've notice that.
Jade: I would really love to hang you.
Tori: … Pfffft… gurl.
Jade: i know im talking like an idiot right now.
Hailey: you always do.
Jade: i have to, otherwise you wouldn't be able to understand me.
Tera:
Tori:
Hailey:
Jade:
Tori: … gurl.
Jade: i could say nice things to you.
Tera: you can start now.
Jade: but I would rather tell the truth.
Andre:
Tori:
Andre: … gurl.
Hailey: sorry but we don't accept failures here.
Tera: and highschool wannabe's
Jade: well i could agree with you, but then we would BOTH be wrong.
Tori:
Jade:
Cat: … gurl.
Hailey: failures will always be failures.
Tera: and wannabe's will always be wannabe's
Jade: it sounds like english, but i can't understand a word you're saying.
Tera: that's because you're an idiot.
Jade: what can i say? You're both good teachers.
Cat:
Tori:
Jade:
Tori: … gurl.
SASSY JADE
Cat: there's this one time when my brother-
Jade: words can not express how much I don't care.
Jade:
Tori:
Andre:
Cat: … gurl.
Sinjin: hey jade-
Jade: please don't interrupt me while im ignoring you. *closes locker*
Sinjin:
Burf:
Sinjin:
Burf: … gurl.
Jade: so babe do you want to go to the scissoring premiere with me?
Tori: sure baby, when is that?
Jade: oh its this saturday I hope-
Robbie: oh I love that! Can rex and I go?
Jade: this is an A and B conversation, please C your way out.
Tori:
Robbie:
Jade:
Robbie: … gurl.
Ryder: Tori im so sorry please give me another chance.
Tori: look ryder I-
Jade: you suddenly remind me of the ocean.
Ryder: what? Why?
Jade: i hate the ocean.
Tori:
Ryder:
Tori:
Ryder:
Tori: pffffttt…
Ryder: … gurl.
Beck sitting next to tori
Beck: i know right, i've seen that movie once.
Tori: really? Well that was—
Jade: you! Off my planet.
Beck:
Tori:
Beck:
Jade:
Beck: … dang gurl.
Beck: i still want you.
Jade: of course you do, im fucking perfect.
Beck:
Jade:
Beck: … dang gurl.
Well hello I updated this again but the next update will be on the next page haha. I added JANDRE, JADE VS HAILEY AND TERA, and SASSY JADE. This is mostly about Jade because I love her so much. Anyways, if you have any more request let me know ok?