Messages in the Fruits Basket
By Cherry-sama

Disclaimer: I do not own anything in Fruits Basket or anything else I plan on mentioning. And also, this fic will contain moments of both Yuki and Tohru, and Kyo and Tohru. No flames please.

AN: Hi! Read this fic please! I know, my first author's note sucks, but hey.

/Shigure's House's Answering Machine/

Tohru: Hello. You have reached the household of the novelist, Shigure. He cannot come to the phone right now so please leave a message after the beep.

Shigure: OOHH TOHRU! What do you think of the answering machine I have bought for our house?

Tohru: I think it's great Shigure! I wonder what Kyo and Yuki will think!

Shigure: Let's not go there…

Kyo: (Insert swear word here) IT! WE'RE OUT OF MILK! RAT BOY! BUY SOME MORE!

Yuki: If you want it so badly, then get it yourself, stupid cat.

Kyo: I WON'T GET IT! YOU GET IT!

Yuki: It's not my fault that you spilled the last drops on the floor, making Miss Honda clean your mess up. And while you're at it, go buy some more leek seeds. You still need to get more ever since you pulled up the ones Miss Honda and I planted.

Tohru: Oh! I'm sorry! I guess I forgot to get some more milk the last time I went to the store!

Shigure: Actually, you didn't… Kyo spilled all fourteen cartons on the floor, making me buy more wood for our floor.

#BEEP#

Message 1: SHIGUUUUURRRREEEEEEEEE! HOW CAN YOU KEEP DOING THIS TO ME! This is you editor speaking. WE HAVE TO HAVE THE NEXT 500 PAGES DONE BY TOMORROW! I KEEP ON GETTING THE FEELING THAT YOU DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY! WHERE ARE YOU HIDING THIS TIME?

#BEEP#

Message 2: Ohhhhhh Yuki! My sweet brother! How are you and your girlfriend getting along? I do hope you will come back to my store sometime soon. I have some more darling outfits you two will just adore! If I am lucky, you two might be able to wear them soon! I hope you propose to that girl soon.

Assistant (who's name I have forgotten): Ayame! You still haven't quite finished your brother's tuxedo…

Ayame: Oh, yes. Of course! Well, I do hope that you will ask that girl to marry you by the time I have finished your outfit. Well, ta ta!

#BEEP#

Message 3: PRINCE YUKI! This is your ultimate fan club! THE PRINCE YUKI FAN CLUB! (sounds are heard of those idiot girls, whom I want to kill, doing that hideous dance) WE WILL GET RID OF THAT WITCH SOON!

#BEEP#

Message 4: Umm… Hello? This is Kagura… Is Kyo there? I was wondering… WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME! YOU PROPOSED TO ME YEARS AGO! WHEN ARE WE GETTING MARRIED! I HOPE YOU AREN'T THINKING ABOUT CALLING OFF OUR WEDDING JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE THE HOTS FOR THAT HONDA GIRL! KYO I MEAN IT! …Bye Kyo, my love… (loud sounds of tearing room apart are heard until there is a sound of something heavy falling towards the phone, and then a loud crash)

#BEEP#

Message 5: Shigure. What is the meaning of this? This is Hatori. I woke up this morning to find a strange machine in the main house. There was one in my house too. I would like an explanation before Akito decides to blame it on Momiji.

AN: And that is my chapter one. I have a sudden urge to post this right after I finished writing it, even though I have promised myself to finish my fics before starting more… I should ask my sister, SoC.