Constant, a grey's anatomy fanfic

FIC: Constant

Rating: M

Summary: Addek squee. Post-Season three.

AN: unbetad. For Kendy.

Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy and other related characters/ideas are owned, ™ and © by The Mark Gordon Company and Shondaland Productions in association with Touchstone Television and ABC. No copyright infringement is intended. So, in conclusion: Don't sue. Please?

It was her eyes that he noticed first. They were his gauge to her moods, her inner thoughts and feelings. They were his constant. It had been a long time since he had taken the time to really look into them. Ironically, it was her good-bye party that finally pushed him to seek out his constant once more, to see if she really was happy with a new job and new city. It took a beer and a half before he could admit to himself that it hurt to see the change in her eyes. It took him another bear and a half to conclude that they were a bit softer and sadder, even a bit more jaded and cynical. However, it was the hint of guilt swirling around in them that hurt him the most because he knew he had put that there. He missed the fire, determination and hope in her eyes. The vibrant blue-green he expected to see had become lighter than he remembered; they were almost a hazel green. There were other subtle changes, as well. She was different somehow. She was more…he just couldn't put a finger on it.

He spent most of the party in a corner waiting for him turn to say good-bye but as the party died down he realized that no opportunity would occur. He made his way to the beverages as he tried to combat the growing panic at that thought. He was pulled from his thoughts when he heard a voice ask, "Derek?"

He didn't try to contain the smile that lit up his face when he saw that it was Addison.

"Addison. Hi," Derek said.

"Can you give me a ride back to my hotel?" Addison asked quietly, "I just wanted to say good bye in private rather than in front of half the hospital."

Derek nodded as his panic subsided, "Whenever you're ready to leave."

"How about now?" Addison asked.

"Okay, I'll meet you out front," Derek said.

The drive back to her hotel was made in silence as was the ride up the elevator. Derek's hand guided Addison down the hall to her hotel room. Addison unlocked the door and led the way inside.

Derek watched silently as she shed her coat, shoes and sat down on the bed to remove her stockings. The familiarity of it all sent a dull ache in Derek's heart. He closed the door before struggling off his coat, shirt and shoes. He reclined down on the bed as he waited for Addison. His eyes never once left her form as she stripped for him with a saucy smile.

Addison finally settled down next to him, her hand lightly skimming over jaw before her thumb caressed his bottom lip.

Addison's hesitant touch against Derek's skin acted like a current that brought him temporarily back to life. The tentative contact only served to enhance his need for her. He started to pull her hungrily towards him, but she stopped him with a soft kiss on the lips.

"No," she protested. "I won't," she started to reply then whispered more firmly, "I can't rush this."

Derek nodded as he met her eyes, allowing her to set the pace.

With a small smile, she grasped his hand and started to play with his long fingers. She massaged them one at a time before she leaned down to press butterfly kisses against his fingers and hand. His eyes drifted shut as he lost himself in her touch, in the familiar heat that always started to burn whenever she was near. It had been a long time since he had allowed that heat to escalate into consuming flames.

He bit back a moan when without warning he felt Addison's tongue dart out to taste his index finger before sucking it slowly into her mouth.

"Addie," He managed to get out as his other hand tried to adjust himself.

"Shh," She replied as she stopped him and reached down to unbutton his pants before pushing them down his legs.

As she moved back up body to his lips, her hand slid against his tense abdominal muscles. Despite her need to go slow, Addison couldn't stop herself from tracing his hard lines and sinewy perfection. It wasn't long before her lips mapped a path up to his lips.

When their lips finally met, everything fell away. The last year of pain, bitterness and anger just fell away. They were simple Addison and Derek again.

She broke away from him to take a gasping breathe before descending on him again, claiming his mouth with hers. His hands were everything she remembered and so much more. She traced the line of his jaw with her tongue as her fingers fluttered over the sharp angles of his cheek bones before sliding into his hair as she straddled him.

She met his eyes and when she saw the scorching desire for her, she lifted herself and slowly sank down. Derek let out a low moan as he felt her heat. Finding her pace, her eyes fluttered closed and she let out a soft moan as his fingers moved to caress her insistently.

"Open your eyes, Addie," Derek managed to get out, meeting her eyes when she finally did. He needed to see if she was still his constant. He needed her to know that a part of him would always hers. He couldn't verbalize it but one look in her eyes and he knew that it was understood. It was as if a heavy weight was lifted from him when he realized there was a part of her that would always be his, as well.

She was nearly incoherent with want and she gave an involuntary moan when he rolled them over and kept up their leisurely pace. It wasn't long before their pace took a more frantic turn as they both got closer and closer.

A raw sound was torn from his throat as she bit down into his shoulder.

When they lay spent, he held her close to him as he pressed soft kisses at the corner of her mouth and the hollow of her throat. They lay entwined together, storing away memories, until the first streaks of dawn start to peak in through the window.

With a last kiss, Derek moved to get dressed. Addison held the sheet to her chest as watched him pull on his pant. Silently, she handed him his shirt. His hand gently closed over hers and their eyes met. With his other hand, Derek brushed her hair off her face before cupping his hand on her cheek. With a sigh Addison fought not to lean into his touch and as she locked her eyes on his, silently pleading with him to not say good bye.

"Its never good bye with us," Derek whispered as he tilted her chin up before he brushed a soft kiss across her lips before he continued to dress himself. He had made it all the way to the door before he rushed back to gather her in his arms one last time before he let her find herself again. Having realizing that she will always be his constant and that this wouldn't be the end of their story together.

The End (for now).