"Donatello." Splinter greeted his second youngest son as he simply stood beside one of the deeper pools in the massive and intricate sewer lines. Donatello had not known that Splinter was behind him, for he had been completely lost in his own thoughts as he stared down at his own reflection in the murky water. "Is something troubling you?"
"It's never going to work, is it, Sensei?" Donatello asked with a voice that spoke of defeat before he even awaited the answer. "She's never going to like me. Not the way I want her to."
Splinter frowned. He knew what Donatello was worried about before he even asked. April had long been the object of the young turtle's affections. Donatello had never made it a secret to anyone but April of his feelings for the young woman. At first he just admired her from afar, but slowly that began to change as Donatello was not satisfied with that. He created flow charts to maximize time with her. He thought of excuses to be alone with her. He fit himself into many aspects of her life to be close to her.
April seemed to reciprocate at least some of those feelings, Splinter noticed. Of the turtles, she was certainly closest with Donatello. When she was in trouble, it was him that she called first. It was him that she texted. When the turtles came back from a harrowing battle, it was Donatello that April went to out of concern. Splinter noticed also that the two of them touched more than April did with any of the others, and Splinter knew the importance of a simple touch-something many took for granted.
"Why do you say that, my son?" Splinter asked. Again, he knew the answer himself, but in making the boys say it out loud it also made them really think about their own feelings and ideas.
"Because I'm a mutant." Donatello's eyes narrowed. "Because there's no future in it. I can't be everything she would need or want. I can't just leave the sewers and go on a date. I can't meet her human friends, I can't relate to her anywhere but right here." Donatello sighed. "And as much as I want to believe that whole story about looking at what is inside instead of what is on the outside, it doesn't change that we are different species."
"Does that bother you-that she is a human and you are a mutant turtle? Does it change your feelings for her because she is not a turtle like you are?"
"No." Donatello stated.
"Then where are these fears coming from, Donatello?"
There had to be a root to this. Donatello was never bothered by this before. Donatello had before fully believed that if April just got to know him that they could make a great couple. Honestly, Splinter didn't disagree.
Donatello was silent for a moment and then sighed. "I overheard her talking on the phone to one of her friends, Irma, I think, about a guy in school."
"Aw, yes, now we are getting somewhere. Do go on." Splinter urged him.
"She was talking about how incredibly hot he was, and his muscle, and excellent hair, and how he looked in P.E. without a shirt. I just thought...she's never been so excited about talking about me like she did him." Donatello's shoulders slumped. "I'm never going to have awesome hair and my pecs are hard because it's a shell." He grumbled. He did flex one arm. "Though I've got muscle. Look at these biceps. Why does she not noticed these biceps, or these calves?" Donatello put down his arm and sighed again in defeat.
"Aw, teenagers." Splinter said aloud to himself. He stepped up closer to Donatello and placed his hand upon the tallest turtle's shoulder.
"I know that logically, I'm wasting my time. She's going to probably go off to college, get married, have kids, and live a normal life. She's not going to want to hang out in the sewers with turtles her whole life, fighting alien robots and other crazy things and risking her life every day."
Donatello looked up to Splinter, "But although I know that, and my brain can think of a million reasons why it won't work...my heart tells me something different." Donatello then went on to ramble, "Which I know is technically still my brain because my heart doesn't function that way and that what I feel is the result of chemicals being released by electrical impulses that..."
"I do get the point, Donatello." Splinter interrupted him before he could really start a long explanation.
"And though I know all of that, it makes my chest hurt to think that I can't be with her."
Splinter sighed. He did feel for Donatello. Love was not easy, no matter any age or any circumstances. It was truly the greatest pleasure and the most horrid agony. "I do have a question to ask you. Have you actually asked her any of this?"
"What?" Donatello gave him a look of pure disbelief. "You mean, just flat out ask? Ask her if she cares that I'm a turtle?"
"Well, yes. I find that it is the best way to get the answers that you seek." When Donatello began to turn greener than usual, Splinter had to smile. He remembered that youth and those hormonal urges that completely took over your sanity. He remembered it well.
"When I was younger, I fell in love with a woman named..."
"Tang Sen. Yes, I am aware."
"I tell this story a lot, don't I?"
Donatello shrugged. "Weeeeelll...yes."
"You will hear it again." Splinter stated before he continued on. "I had feelings for Tang Shen. She was beautiful and and wonderful. I wanted to be with her. I, like you, looked for excuses to be with her no matter how small or far fetched. We were friends, but I did not know if she would accept me as more. My fear that she would not prevented me from seeking what I wanted. Then came along Oroku Saki."
"The Shredder...and he loved her too."
"He had the confidence that I did not. He sought out her company as well and I felt anger towards him for this, but also towards myself for not being able to do what he was doing. I began to believe that it was he that truly deserved her, and my heart ached."
"But you got the girl in the end, sensei." Donatello pointed out.
"I did. I overcame my fear and I told Tang Shen how I felt. What I did not know what that she had been doing the very same thing that I was. When she needed help she would call me above all others. She would leave me notes instead of others. In greetings and in speaking, she would place her hand on my arm and smile. I had overlooked all of the signs that she was giving because I was so focused upon my own fears. I overlooked the hugs that she had given me that she gave no one else, or that it was my name that was always first on her lips."
Donatello's eyes widened as the realization suddenly hit him. Everything that Splinter said that Tang Shen was doing was exactly what April did. Was he just so blind that he really didn't see it?
"Oh. I see you got the point." Splinter smiled knowingly.
"Yes! Thank you, Sensei. I gotta go. I gotta find April!" Donatello then was out of the sewer tunnel in a flash, almost knocking over Mikey and the pizza box he was holding.
"Hey! Donnie! Watch it, bro!" Mikey sighed.
"Why is he in such a hurry?" Raph asked in annoyance. "Did the new computers come out today or some other geeky thing he does?"
Splinter joined them. "He is going to tell April his feelings."
That made both Raph and Mikey burst out laughing. Raph then stated, "Yeah, right. He'll get halfway there and then chicken out."
"Perhaps, but perhaps not. I think, though, even if he does, he'll see things differently from now on." Splinter replied.
"Yeah, he was kind of a jerk most of the night." Mikey said. "Worse than Raph."
Raph made a growling noise that Mikey didn't even flinch at.
Leo then came in. "Yeah, but he wouldn't tell us why."
Splinter explained. "Donatello fears that April's attentions are focused upon a young, human male."
"That's rough, but what can you do?" Raph shrugged. "I mean, he is a mutant turtle."
"But Donnie is awesome." Mikey interjected. "And he really cares about April. He does so much for her, it's really cute. If she picks any guy over Donnie, then it's her loss. In my opinion, there's no better guy."
Leo nodded, "I agree. I just hope he does't get his heart broken."
Raph replied, "Well, it is a better love story than Twilight."
Mikey laughed, "Raph reads Twilight!"
"I am gonna hit you out of your shell."
Splinter simply smiled and silently walked away.
