A Different Ending

Summary: What if Grissom hadn't gotten to her in time?

Disclaimer: Nothing is owned by me.

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This was one body Doctor Robbins did not want to open. Did not want to cut apart to violate the woman's secrets. He had no choice. She stared up at him, eye open and unblinking. Seeing through him but not seeing anything at all. Her eyes still had their blue color, but they were covered with a milky glaze. He looked away, unable to face her cold, almost accusing stare. He covered her eyes with his hand and closed them. She would never open them again.

With a sigh of defeat, he called Grissom.

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Hold on to me, love
You know I can't stay long
All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid
Can you hear me?
Can you feel me in your arms?

It wasn't supposed to end like this. He thought staring down at the lifeless body before him. It wasn't supposed to but it had, and Gil Grissom was stuck with a bad hand in the poker game of life and fate.

She lay on the cold morgue table. Strawberry blonde hair spread out around her. She looked like she was sleeping. Peacefully, away from the horrors of the world, or her job, or every tragedy she worked with on the graveyard shift. He, however, knew her sleep was anything but peaceful. The bruising around her neck proved it. The bruises that covered her from head to toe proved it. His hand shook as they intertwined themselves in hers.

She was so cold. Icy. Distant. It was like him calling to her and never getting an answer. Like he was running toward her, but never able to touch her no matter how fast he ran. She was always just out of his reach. He had never envisioned this. He had thought about it, but the moment the thought entered his mind, he would shove it out. He never thought he would finally be investigating the case of his best friend. Where she would be the victim he had to avenge.

Say goodnight
Don't be afraid
Calling me, calling me
As you fade to black

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Warrick and Nick finally got him to confess, but the nature of the crime was more than they could bear. Sara felt vomit fill her mouth and excused herself. It wasn't that this was the worse crime she had ever encountered, it was the fact that this crime was against her friend and team member.

Warrick and Nick sat in the questioning room in silence, even after Brass and Sofia led the perp out.

"Can you believe that guy?" Warrick said in disbelief and wonder.

"Murdered her in cold blood." Nick replied. "For money and drugs."

"She was worth more than that." Warrick stated bitterly.

Nick nodded. They were lost in their own little worlds. The team would never be the same without her.

I'll miss the winter
A world of fragile things
Look for me in the white forest
Hiding in a hollow tree
I know you hear me
I can taste it in your tears

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Sara heaved into the crime lab toilet. It was too much for her in one day. She had been the one to find the body. It was horrible. He had buried her in a wooded area in the outskirts of Vegas. She hadn't been dead when he brought her to the woods, he thought she was, but she had hung in there. So he choked the life out of her. Digging up a shallow grave and burying her.

Lindsay had been with her when they saw it. Sara had quickly pulled Lindsay away and into her arms, to keep the sight of her mother dead from scarring the young girl, but Lindsay had seen. would never forget the way that little girl stared at Robbins covering her mother's body. Her mouth had been set and her teeth were gritted. Her eyes spoke of a woman much older than a girl of merely eight. The child didn't cry until she was far away from everyone else. Alone in the car that she broke down. Sara envied her strength.

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Closing your eyes to disappear
You pray your dreams will leave you here
But still you wake and know the truth
No one's there

Grissom felt tears sting his eyes as he looked down at the woman lying before him. Even in death, she wasn't broken. She had fought tooth and nail up until she breathed her last breath. Eddie had the marks to prove it. Catherine had the forensic evidence to prove it. Grissom touched her one last time. Her hair, her face, her hand. He closed his eyes and memorized every detail about her. Her smile, her laugh, her voice. He would never hear her voice again, never see her smile, never hold her warmth in his arms again. She was gone forever. The thought was more than he could bear.

How ironic it was for the execution of Catherine Willows to cause the murder of Gil Grissom.

Holding my last breath...
Safe inside myself...
Are all my thoughts of you...
Sweet raptured life it ends here tonight...

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Author's note: I'm sorry guys, I had to write a depressing story and well, I didn't have the heart to end it this way officially because I wanted to write a sequel. So here's the painful alternate ending. I hope I made a few tears.

Song is out of order, but it's by Evanescence. It's called My Last Breath.