Author's Note:
Thanks to the lovely KarenES for beta-ing this for me and helping me out when it counted. I've taken her suggestions into account and edited any errors, so please know any mistakes found are my own.
While our beloved show will return next month, it won't be all sunshine and roses at first, so we've come up with a simple and short prompt to finish off the summer of fic challenges. Feel free to PM me, KarenES, or Shiny Jewel for details.
Disclaimer: These characters are not my own. I just like to take them out to play. :)
1.
Rayna realizes it for the first time as she stands over her crib. It's an early Friday morning, the pale glow of sunlight peeking through purple curtains. Teddy headed to the office, something about paperwork or a meeting, but either way she knows he'll be gone all day, leaving her and baby Maddie alone. A strange sense of happiness fills her at that fact as her toes curl into the plush carpet of the nursery.
Maddie stirs, her eyelids fluttering open as her tiny arms reach up, grasping for her. She wraps a hand around one of Rayna's fingers.
The tug in her chest isn't new, but feels the same as it did the first time Maddie's touch graced her skin.
"Good mornin' baby girl," she whispers, smiling. She reaches into the crib, brushing the soft brown hair that has slowly grown on Maddie's head. "Did you sleep well?" she asks, reaching up to turn on the mobile. Soft music begins to play while little animals—frogs, dogs, kittens—turn around in circles. It's become a morning ritual, something that soothes Maddie while they ease into her day. Something they've done at least a dozen times on mornings when Rayna's woken up and realized it's just the two of them.
But something about this time is different. Maybe it's the way Rayna rubs her little tummy with her free hand, or the way Rayna hums along to the lullaby the mobile plays, but as she looks down into the crib she hears Maddie let out a soft giggle and smile.
She's seen her smiling before in her sleep, a peaceful expression on her soft features, but never like this. Never when she's awake, and she can't help but feel happy when she realizes it is she, and she alone, observing this first true smile.
The way the curve of a mouth causes a cheek to rise and eyes to sparkle with a certain something has been her undoing before, not by this tiny being she's taken charge of, but by her father.
A longing for Deacon to be here, to see the way her smile so closely mirrors his own, assaults her senses, and before she knows it, Rayna feels tears spilling down her cheeks. She knows this isn't the first moment of her life he's missed, and she knows with a sense of guilt it won't be the last.
"Do you like that, sweetheart?" Rayna asks, fluttering her fingers over Maddie's tummy once more, longing to see that smile light up her features again.
2.
Her ninth birthday is spent on the road. By luck, it manages to land on a weekend, and so with the help of Bucky and a few guys from the band, Rayna's able to give her a small semblance of a party. She and Tandy take her and young Daphne out to lunch and an afternoon of shopping. When they get back, a room at the arena has been decked out with streamers and balloons, and a table near the wall houses a cake and presents.
Most of the presents are typical for a girl her age; nail polish, new shoes, a bracelet made of little pink shells. But after the cake has been eaten and she's told everybody thank you, Deacon emerges as everyone leaves the room, trying and essentially failing to hide something behind his back.
"You think you can handle one more gift, Maddie?"
Maddie pushes her glasses up the bridge of her nose, shifting her position on the couch and looking up at him in surprise. She kicks a piece of sparkly gold wrapping paper away from her on the floor. "You didn't have to get me anything, Uncle Deacon. I thought that the journal was from you."
"It was," Deacon repeats, pulling what he is hiding from behind his back. He holds up the guitar and grins as he watches her eyes widen. "I figured you could use it, that it might help you when you're using this."
"A guitar?" she exclaims, still trying to grasp the idea. "For me? That's…really?"
He looks over at Rayna, who is standing a few feet away watching as they interact. "Your mama was tellin' me the other day how she caught you playin' one of hers, tryin' to figure out the right notes and things. I figured it was high time you got yourself one of your own."
Maddie holds out her hands as he places the guitar on her lap. She reaches out her slender fingertips, stroking the strings almost reverently. "Wow…this is—"
"Maddie, what do you say?" Rayna asks, almost hesitant to intrude.
"Thank you, thank you, Uncle Deacon. It's great it's—" Maddie pauses, searching for the right words as the thought occurs to her. "I know how to play a little bit, but what if I mess up?"
Deacon glances over at Rayna, who nods, and he sits next to Maddie on the sofa. "Well, first of all…you're still learnin', darlin'. That means you're bound to slip up sometimes. Heck, I still do."
"Really?"
"Yes, really. It also happens to be true that this is the perfect guitar to start learnin' on. Also? If you ever want a lesson, I'd be more than happy to help."
"Me too," Rayna pipes up, carefully uncrossing her arms as she walks over to where they're sitting. "But right now I'm thinkin' you've gotta go meet up with your Aunt Tandy. She took Daphne for a walk to get somethin' to drink. What do you say we go see if we can find them?"
Maddie carefully sets her guitar off to the side, pretending not to be disappointed at the interruption. She leans over on the couch, giving Deacon a quick hug. "Thank you," she whispers.
He's not sure why, but as she clings to his neck, Deacon feels his eyes begin to tear up at the little girl he's watched grow up. "Anytime."
3.
The stuffed animal he gives her sits on her bed for weeks after the accident at Juliette's show. At thirteen, she knows most of her friends consider themselves too old for toys that don't need electricity, and by now most of her dolls and other toys have been passed down to Daphne, but when Talia comes over one day to study for a project she either doesn't notice the animal or chooses not to say anything.
At some point, it falls off of the bed, getting wedged between the side of her mattress and the nightstand. She sees it each morning as she gets ready, sometimes smiling and other times barely taking notice.
It's not until after Deacon and her mother get in a car accident that she truly thinks of it again. After a brief visit at the hospital, Tandy drives her and Daphne to the house to collect some of their things before taking them over to Teddy's. Maddie rifles through her clothes, not really caring what she grabs, but when her eyes land on the stuffed animal, she snatches it up immediately.
She sits on the edge of her bed, brushing her fingers through the plush white fur, thinking of the way her mother had given it to her, saying it was from her Uncle Deacon. Now things aren't so simple. He's not her uncle, but her father, and she's barely had enough time to process that fact and figure out what it means.
She presses the stuffed animal close to her chest, feeling a tear slip down her cheek. Things are so confusing, and the only thing she can think about now is the fact that at the hospital she wasn't allowed to see him. Aunt Tandy had said it wasn't the right time, and seconds after that her dad—or, really, Teddy…or maybe her father, she hesitates, unsure of just what she should call him—showed p, ushering them all out of the hallway. She'd caught Scarlett on the way out however, who had assured her everything would be okay.
Daphne calls from down the hall, telling her to hurry up, that they need to head over.
Shaking her head, Maddie stands up, still clutching the gift from Deacon in her hand. "I'll be there in a minute."
She thinks of how much has happened in the past few days, and what hasn't happened, because she's almost certain there are still conversations to be had, and places the stuffed animal on top of everything else in her suitcase. She heads out the door, hoping everything will work out for the best.
4.
"You all right?"
Deacon asks, knocking on the door of Maddie's bedroom. He'd been out in the living room with Rayna, both of them tuned into the song they were writing, when Maddie stormed in, running toward the stairs without a second thought. Rayna had gone up a few minutes later, only to be pointedly ignored. He had waited a few minutes after that before suggesting he go up to see if he could help, which lead him to waiting outside her door. "Listen, Maddie, if you don't feel like talkin'—"
"Come in," she says, her words barely audible. When he cracks the door open, he sees her sprawled out on her bed, face pressed into a pillow.
Deacon stands awkwardly in the doorway for a few minutes, unsure of exactly what to say or do, before deciding to sit at the foot of her bed, ready to talk if she wanted. "Last I heard, you were goin' out with friends tonight. A movie or somethin'? What happened?"
Maddie sniffles, her back facing him. "It's nothin'."
Tentative, he reaches a hand out and strokes the hair away from her face. It's been three years since he found out the truth, and it's been a rocky road to get here, but he finds himself grateful that things have slowly worked themselves out. That doesn't stop the pang in his chest at seeing Maddie—his daughter, he thinks, the thought rocking him each time he thinks it—curled up and in pain. "Did someone say something to you? Did someone hurt—"
Maddie spins around, shaking her head. "No, it's not like that at all. It's just, well…" she trails off, fiddling with the frayed hem of the comforter. "Someone said they would be there and they weren't, and then when they finally did show up they brought someone with them, that's all."
It takes Deacon a few moments to piece it all together. Despite knowing Maddie nearly her whole life, he still finds that it takes a minute to understand what she's saying when she's so emotional. "Maddie, are you tellin' me you're this worked up over a boy?" he waits for her very brief and shy nod. When Rayna had given permission for her to go see a movie earlier in the night, it hadn't exactly been a secret that boys would be there, but it didn't stop him from feeling a bit surprised. "Are you…are you old enough to be, you know…" he scratches the back of his neck, searching in vain for the right way to phrase it. "interested in boys?"
"I'm sixteen," Maddie replies, her voice firm.
He laughs, seeing a bit more of Rayna in her now than he ever has, and smiles sadly. "Okay. And I'm guessin' there was probably some boy you took a shine to, only for him to like someone else?" he asks, waiting for Maddie's positive response before going further.
"It's just stupid, I know. I'm stupid for ever thinking he could—"
"Maddie, you listen to me right now, okay?" Deacon interrupts, hating the way his words come out harsher than he means for them to. He's in uncharted waters, and he's torn between wanting Rayna to rush in and fix the situation and wanting to ease his daughter's pain himself. He sends up a silent prayer that he not screw this one up. "You may be a lot of things, but stupid is not one of 'em. You hear me?"
Maddie nods, taking the tissue he hands her to dry her eyes. "Then why would he do this? Why else would he bring some other girl?"
"Honestly? I have no idea. But can I give you a piece of advice?" he asks, the words falling out of his mouth before he's really begun to process them. He scoots closer to her, taking hold of her hand, hoping again that words won't fail him. "Darlin', you are a beautiful girl. You hear me? You are. And, well, like you said yourself, you're only sixteen. Just because some jack—" he pauses, editing himself at the quirk of her raised eyebrow. "Just because some jerk ditches you, that don't mean somebody better won't come along. You're better than that, okay? You always will be."
"Okay," she replies, nodding her head in agreement. "I'm sorry for making a scene."
"Don't you ever apologize for bein' upset about something, sweetheart. The way you feel is important to me. To your mama, too."
"She's probably mad, the way I slammed the door."
Deacon shakes his head, surprised by the way she's perked up and her tears have dried. Despite having a way with words for a song, giving advice has never really been his forte. "I doubt it. But there's only one way to find out. C'mon, there's a carton of ice cream down in the freezer."
5.
"What if I mess up? I'll be up on that stage and everyone will know."
"Hey, you've been practicin', right? Everything's gonna be fine."
Maddie glances over at Deacon as he drives, eyes narrowed as he pointedly avoids her stare. "You're just sayin' that to make me feel better, aren't you?"
Deacon's hands tighten around the steering wheel. Somehow, in the hustle of getting everyone rounded up for Maddie's first solo show, he's managed to be her driver, while Rayna drives Daphne in a separate car with Tandy. How that had worked out, he isn't quite clear. "No, I'm not. I'm sayin' it because it's the truth. You'll get up there, maybe you'll be nervous, but the crowd will love you."
Maddie laughs nervously, picking at her nails as she replies. "That's probably because half of them are friends or family."
Deacon circles the block before finally finding a place to park. He pulls the key from the ignition, but doesn't move to get out. He stares at the young woman he's gotten the privilege of watching grow up, no longer sure which parts of her were inherited from Rayna and which came from him.
The anxiety over messing up on a first gig however, he thinks, is probably a blend of both. He takes off his seatbelt, turning to the backseat where both of their guitar cases sit.
"What are you doin'?" Maddie asks, her door already halfway open.
He reaches into his case, fishing into a pocket for a moment before clasping the item in his hands. "I want you to have this, at least while you're up there playin'."
Maddie reaches out and feels him place something into her palm. She looks down, confused for a moment. "I have my own guitar pick."
"I know you do," he agrees. "It's just, well, that's mine. I've played a couple of great shows with it. I figured you could use it for good luck or somethin'."
She feels the pick in her fingers, small but still effective. "Thank you."
In the rearview, Deacon sees Rayna pull up behind him, and he knows whatever moment they are having is over. "You'll do great, darlin'," he reaches over, planting a tentative kiss on her cheek. "I'll see you inside."