Chapter notes:

I'd like to thank Ace's Japanese VA for being a huge inspiration. I was listening to Living Fire (Ace's first ever character song!) while writing most of this (last 2015 and 2016, gah!).

Lots of love and grateful hugs to shockandlock for looking this story over for me, no matter how long I took writing this thing. You're the absolute best!

Part 2 of 3 of the Next Time universe, though it can stand alone. If you want to read the whole thing in order, just follow this lovely, evil phrase I was planning for two years:

Next Time | I Want | Just You

Chapter 1: Routine

Isolation was always more than just a word, more than just a concept, for Marco.

Perhaps in its simplest sense, the term was inapplicable to his situation. Ever since he could remember, he had always been surrounded by his friends, the bird race. These friends of his were more than welcoming, treating Marco like he was worth more than he actually was. It was late when he realized their friendship was one-sided; his friends approached him not with the intention to befriend, but with the intention to serve.

They bowed down to him. He was not treated as an equal, but as a superior.

Marco always stood out. He had long since accepted the other birds as his siblings rather than his friends, but he had something the others didn't.

And the moment the light of the Sun shone on Marco, he became a creature no one could imagine.

Ever since he awoke into the world, he had questioned his identity. Why was he the only bird of his kind? Where were his parents? Where did he come from? This mental self-questioning burdened him for as long as he could remember and nothing, not even the countless praises he'd received from birds and non-birds alike, could abate this feeling.

I want a place to belong.

Marco considered it both a blessing and a curse when the Sun had noticed his beauty and uniqueness, granting him abilities and features no other being possessed, and an eternal life no sooner after.

It was a great relief for him when he could aid his brothers and sisters. One teardrop from him was all it took to heal a broken wing. He became their savior, the King of the Birds, and Marco prided himself on it.

However, it was hell for him—as if he hadn't heard that before from humans who once called him Hell incarnate when they saw his fiery appearance—every time he witnessed his siblings die. He would shed a thousand drops of his tears, but still, he couldn't bring them back. Every time this happened, Marco was reminded of his immortality. He was the only one blessed with an everlasting life—not his siblings, not even the humans.

No one else could remain but the phoenix.

He was the greatest of his race, but also the loneliest.

Marco knew that the Sun could hear his misery in his songs. One day, the Sun finally questioned him.

"Is something the matter, my son?"

"Nothing, Father," he lied. He was used to calling the Sun his father as everyone called him that, but saying it now made Marco sad.

The Sun shone brighter. "Are you getting tired of singing for me?"

"No. I just don't feel happy."

"Not feeling happy means you are lonely, miserable. Why are you so miserable, son?"

Marco sighed deeply. "Why me? Of all the creatures in the world, why did you choose me?"

"So you are getting tired of singing," the Sun said, not sounding offended in the least. In fact, he sounded amused.

"No! I am only curious."

"You're not curious. You're miserable. You're asking me why I made you even more different than before."

Was that what he meant? Marco did not reply.

"Well, son, you are one of a kind, to begin with. Your feathers are unlike anything I've ever seen on this planet, so I gave you my fire to compliment them. Birds are the most wonderful singers, but your song rises above all. Isn't that enough reason for me to give you gifts?"

Marco was silent as he contemplated. "But why immortality? Why did you make me immortal?"

The Sun shone brighter than before and dimmed before lighting up again, and Marco realized the Sun was laughing. "Oh, dear me! Have you forgotten, Marco? How long was it? Almost half a million years? No wonder!"

"What do you mean?"

"I did not force eternal life upon you. You asked for it. Remember, the first year you sang for me, you were growing old and feared you couldn't continue your songs. You went west, where I first saw you, asked me for eternal life, and you were reborn in fire under my power. You are immortal because you wanted to be."

Marco drew in a shaky breath as his foggy memories struggled to pinpoint the exact moment the Sun was describing. How could he forget? Had so much time passed that he'd forgotten such a crucial decision?

"If I asked to be mortal again, would you turn me?"

"No. I can allow you to be selfish only once." At Marco's pained look, the Sun chuckled. "I'm merely humoring you, Marco. However, I cannot allow you to be mortal again."

"Why not?"

"Are you aware that the Egyptians have written stories about you? If they sought you out, you'd be in mortal peril."

"From what I've seen, no one can be safe forever," Marco muttered reluctantly.

"That's right. No one can, except the phoenix." The Sun's light focused on Marco, the cerulean colors of the phoenix's wings glittering brighter than a diamond. "Son, have you forgotten the good things that happened because of your immortality? Because of you, the birds are safe, as well as your herbivore friends. Isn't that enough reason to remain immortal?"

Marco lowered the wings he had raised while singing and conversing with the Sun and bowed his head. He was truly grateful he could help his siblings and friends. He didn't want to leave them unprotected, but what could he do when his heart grew heavier each day?

Marco was at a loss, but he felt a hint of regret for his actions. Being ungrateful and selfish was the least thing he wanted to achieve.

"You're right, Father," he said slowly. "I am… needed in this world." He wanted to accept his own decision, really. The lump in his throat wouldn't go away no matter how many times he swallowed.

"You are indeed, Marco." The Sun sounded pleased. "Say, maybe you are getting tired of moving all around the world every time your rebirth comes near. If you liked, I could make a forest in the middle of the desert, an oasis—oh, even better than an oasis, a paradise!—where you can safely live without human interference. No one dares to explore the desert in the southwest. It makes the perfect home for you. What do you say?"

The prospect of a reprieve in an unexplored region made Marco's wings quiver with anticipation. "It's near Egypt. Is that all right?"

"Oh, yes. The Egyptians are too busy building their temples. And I will make sure no one comes near the oasis."

The Sun finished the oasis in thirty days. Marco gasped when he saw the luscious trees and the glimmering lake that would be impossible to find in an ordinary oasis. His family and several friends came to live with him. At the moment, Marco was safe and content.

At the moment, it was enough.

Marco didn't know why he left the oasis that morning. He could blame it on Haruta suddenly deciding to go back to calling him Your Majesty. He could also blame it on the sudden commotion of childbirth that finally shifted their attention away from him. If Marco didn't know any better, he'd assume fate had made him leave.

When the gravity of his actions finally weighed on him, Marco was miles away from home. Not only that, but he could also detect the smell of burnt wood in the air and knew humans were near. His heart thundered in his chest as he stilled in midair before abruptly turning, more keen than before to get back home. Humans seeing Marco never ended well; it was an unquestionable fact. His experience with the Egyptians was enough proof.

If he remembered correctly, he had headed east, so the city he had been approaching was probably Sumer. He had not met someone from that city and was not about to change that anytime soon.

The scent of burning wood was gone. Marco relaxed as he took in the humid smell of sand when suddenly he noticed something out of the ordinary.

There were two black figures standing out against the pale blanket of barren land far below. He did not know what creature the other one was, but he recognized the deep growling of the carnivorous fox, resounding in the distance.

Foxes were Marco's natural enemies, so he changed course and glided down. He beat his wings to fly faster when he noticed the fox running towards its defenseless opponent. An angered fox glared back and bared its teeth. Marco had no doubt that the fox recognized him and knew of his capabilities, if the slight wavering in the fox's steel eyes was any indication.

But foxes were foolish creatures who had the biggest pride Marco had ever known, so the swift bite aimed at his neck was unsurprising. Marco dodged the attack on time and took advantage of the opportunity he was presented with. With his sharp talons, he kicked the fox in the stomach. The fox did not anticipate it and took a direct hit, falling on its back.

Marco was quick to put his talons on its body to hold it down, giving a sharp cry in warning. Stay away! The fox growled, low and defeated. After a few moments, Marco finally eased back, letting his enemy hobble away from him and its previous opponent.

Finally, Marco sighed and turned to look at the creature he had saved.

Only to have the greatest shock of his life.

It was a human and not just any human—it was a human child!

What in the Sun's name is this child doing here? What were humans thinking leaving a child on his own, in a desert no less?! Even Marco's family made sure never to let the chicks leave the nest until they were fully capable of taking care of themselves. This child in front of him looked so fragile and innocent, tired and battered, but breathing and alive.

Part of Marco wanted to find out how the child ended up in such a place. He eyed the cuts and bruises painted along sun-kissed skin and hesitated, cursing himself immediately. He knew what to do, but the fact that this child was human had made him think twice, and he hated himself for it. Human or not, a child was still a child, innocent and clear of sin.

Marco froze when he noticed the child staring at him. How come he had not noticed that the child was conscious sooner? He remained immobile, not knowing what to do in a situation such as this one. Thankfully, the child fainted, due to exertion perhaps, and Marco breathed a sigh of relief.

Before the child awoke, he bent down, recalling grim moments of his life and letting his tears soak the child's wounds.

Within moments, the child was wound-free. Now that he cured the child, Marco did not know what to do next. Oh, he knew all right. He was just hesitating. Again. He had to bring the child back to the city, but he couldn't risk discovery. After more thinking, he decided to leave the child near the river by the edge of the city. Surely that place was safe from fox attacks. It was enough of a solution for Marco, and so he carried the child on his back, left him by the tall weeds, and flew back home.

As he was airborne, Marco could not resist not looking back to check up on the child. He was still unconscious and Marco wanted to burn the scene of the sleeping child in his memory.

At least he was able to help a human. Just this once.

Marco headed home without any more interruptions, hoping no one was panicking yet.

He had never been more wrong to hope, but considering what he had done, the chastisement was worth it.

Marco sighed as his family hovered above him protectively, filling the air with their worried chirps and flashes of colorful flapping feathers. It gave him an impression of a prison and he shuddered at the thought. That was foolish. He could not be anyone's prisoner. He was a bird—not just any ordinary bird. He was the phoenix. He was supposed to be freer than anyone else.

So then why did he feel caged?

Haruta's orange wings flapping in front of him snapped Marco out of his reverie. Oh, right. He was still being scolded. As if having your entire family literally hovering above you was not bad enough, Marco had to endure a very lengthy lecture about giving the bird race heart attacks by Haruta.

"Your Majesty! Are you listening? Why did you suddenly disappear like that? We were worried sick! We couldn't even contact the Sun because it was already night time. Oh! We thought something happened to you. I—"

"Haruta, please." Marco had had enough and had decided to end his sibling's rant. "I know what I did was wrong, and I'm sorry for worrying all of you." Coos filled the air, soft, reassuring, and forgiving. Marco gave a small smile. "My actions are something I can't explain either. It was like I had to head east and save that human child—"

"Whoa, whoa! Hold on. Save? Human?" Haruta asked incredulously, her voice rising. The rest of the birds started flying around restlessly.

Marco waved off his family's concern. "Human child. It's a long story. Anyway, I returned safely. That's all that matters, isn't it?"

Haruta gave him a long, hard stare before sighing. She nudged the berries, causing them to roll toward Marco. "Hungry?"

Marco smiled, feeling warm from his sibling's acceptance.

Life at the oasis stayed peaceful for some time, but if Marco was asked, he would define the place as predictable. Yes, he appreciated the constant presence of food, his family, and his friends, but he missed the change. Perhaps he was longing for the change of scenery he had grown used to. Birds were migratory creatures, after all. Also, Marco realized that this longing might have been what pushed him to head east before. It was quite possible.

However, as soon as he wished for his change, he was quick to regret it. One sunny day, groups of human men tried to invade Marco's oasis to capture him. Luckily, the Sun had caught wind of their plan and sent a sandstorm their way. Most of them had not survived, and the few that did had reached the oasis and were attacked by his angry family.

Marco told them he could handle the humans himself, but they were obstinate. The humans had no mercy killing his family—all he and his family were trying to do was drive the humans away—and it sparked something in Marco.

In that moment, he remembered. Humans were evil, ruthless, and selfish. They did not deserve pity or mercy because they did not voluntarily give any themselves in the first place.

And so with Marco's rage let loose, he clawed the humans in their faces that they loved so much. His once harmless fire burned their skin. The air was filled with human screams, shrill and pained. Marco allowed anger to control him because it was the only way he could save his family and himself.

Only when bones had become ashes did Marco's actions sink in. His wings stopped moving and he fell down a staggering fifty feet. The ache from his broken bones was welcomed. Marco reveled in it, letting it overwhelm his senses. He held back tears, because this was not the time for him to heal himself. He crawled away without any destination in mind. When the burning sensation became unbearable, Marco stopped.

The recoiling in his belly that had started the moment he fell rushed forward, and Marco doubled over, retching. He emptied the contents of his stomach as he fought back the images of bloodied eyes and the smell of burning flesh.

Marco tried and tried to forget, but he could not. If this was payment for what he had done, he would take it. When he brought a wing to curl around his head, he was standing upright in an instant.

Skin. Arms. Legs. Mouth. Hands. Feet.

The universe had a twisted way of paying back.

He could sense his family behind him, could hear their chirping. Despite his form, he expected to hear gibberish but Marco was surprised that he could make out intelligible language. He remained wide-eyed as Haruta flapped in front of him—in a much higher view than before.

"M-Marco?! What happened? Are you okay? Do—"

"Calm down, Haruta." Maroc froze. Who spoke? Him?! Was it really him? It did not sound like him. It sounded—

"Human," came an awed whisper. Marco craned his neck up and squinted as the Sun shone its full rays at him. "You're human, Marco!"

"Father," he called desperately. "W-what happened to me? How did this happen?"

The Sun hummed. "I have no idea myself. The only explanation I can come up with is that the true identity of the phoenix race must be part bird, part human. You're human, Marco!"

"I'm not!" Marco all but yelled, startling the Sun. "There is no way I can be one of those merciless creatures."

"Marco!" The sun sounded aghast. "You should know better. They're not all merciless. Do not be so close-minded."

A vague memory surged up in his mind's eye, one of a child lying unconscious with gashes across his skin, and knew he had to agree. But he did not tell the sun that.

"What do I do?" was what he said instead.

It took the sun a long time before he replied. "There is no other choice than accept it. Embrace it. Discover yourself, Marco. For once try to know yourself. Tell me you'll try."

Marco nodded slowly, but his heart was heavy. Still, he answered, "I'll try."

Thankfully, Marco transformed back by the end of the day. But after that event, not once did Marco try to revert to his human form.

Until that day.

Chapter notes:

Chapters 2 and 3 will be up soon!

Also, I had trouble with formatting, so please tell me if something looks wrong.