Title: An honest man
Author: Metalfan616
Characters: Boyd, Mel
Pairing: Boyd/Mel
Rating: K
Synopsis: After witnessing Boyd hide evidence and eventually come clean, Mel goes to talk to him in his office
Spoilers: Season 3 episode 1 - Multistorey
Mel hesitated at the door to Boyd's office, her hand hovering inches away with uncertainty. She could see him through the windows, his figure hunched over paperwork, elbows resting upon the desk, hands covering his head. She knew the case had taken a lot out of him and dredged up things about Nick Patterson, his friend, which he would rather not have thought about again, but there was one thing that needed to be done before he could move on from this.
Mel had waited until the others had gone home, feigning a desire to finish up her paperwork that night as her reason for lingering later than usual. Frankie had left early, clearly still shocked by the outcome of the case, followed closely by Grace and Spencer. Mel had not even considered the fact that Boyd might leave early; he was always the last out of the office every evening.
She knocked quietly once and waited for his muffled reply before easing the door open and stepping halfway into the room, still reluctant to do what she knew she had to.
"Hi, Mel."
He gave her a weary half smile which she couldn't quite bring herself to mirror.
"Could I talk to you for a moment?"
"Sure."
Boyd waved a hand at the seat in front of his desk, shifting half empty coffee cups and stacks of paperwork out of the way as Mel took the seat. He looked at her expectantly and she could feel herself growing ever more uncomfortable and beginning to think this was a very bad idea. Boyd had a quick temper and she knew she was about to push it as far as it would reach.
Mel reached into her jacket pocket, weighing the tape carefully in her hand before removing it and placing it on the desk between them. Boyd stared at it silently for a few long seconds, studying it closely as Mel waited for the explosion of anger.
Eventually he let out a weary sigh and leant back in his seat, not looking her in the eye as he reached for the tape, turning it over in his hands.
"I had a feeling it might have been you."
Mel stared at him open mouthed. She was still on edge, still waiting for the yelling and the accusations to start, but he had caught her off guard.
"I know I shouldn't have gone through your desk but I saw the interview and, and I saw you remove the tape and I just didn't know what to do, I . . ." Mel found herself trailing off as he glanced up and met her eyes finally. There was something behind them, disappointment maybe, but not in her, she realised.
"Why didn't you tell the others? Why didn't you confront me earlier on?"
Mel could see now that he wasn't going to explode at any second, he was just genuinely confused. She decided that it might be safe to tread a little less carefully now.
"Because I know you're better than that. I wanted to give you a chance to prove me right, to do the honest thing."
Boyd gave a quiet, humourless chuckle and reached for the bottle of whiskey kept in a desk drawer. He poured two glasses and nudged one across the desk towards Mel. She accepted it without comment, waiting for him to take a mouthful before following suit. Boyd stared into his glass and seemed to pull his next question from the amber liquid within it.
"And did I?" He glanced up and met her eyes as she took another sip. "Did I prove myself an honest man?"
"Yes. Eventually," Mel replied.
Boyd's laugh this time was genuine and Mel felt somewhat reassured that she had not in fact made the worst move of her career by doing this.
"Thanks, Mel," Boyd said eventually.
"For what?"
Boyd seemed to hesitate for a moment, re-evaluating his words before he answered. When he did, his voice was quiet and the words were filled with an emotion that Mel had never heard in him before and could not place.
"For giving me a chance, for still having some faith in me." He smiled as he took in the small, slightly surprised smirk on her face. "Well, what did you expect me to say?"
"Something along the lines of 'you're fired' actually. And I expected you to yell it, probably repeatedly."
"Give me a little credit, Mel," Boyd said, finishing his drink and carefully placing the glass back on the desk next to the files. "I know I'm not necessarily the most patient man in the world, but I also know when I've made a mistake, when something is my fault."
"Did Grace say anything to you?" Mel asked, remembering Grace's appalled reaction when Boyd had finally admitted that Martin Corgan had retracted his statement.
Boyd nodded, running a hand through his hair and over his face wearily. He looked exhausted, Mel thought.
"Yeah, yeah she came and gave me her professional evaluation of my behaviour in a very disappointed tone of voice."
Mel smiled apologetically. Despite her initial anger at Boyd for even considering concealing evidence, she could understand why he had done it. He was scared, scared that the man who had been responsible for so many deaths, including, (though they had now proved it not to be the case), that of one of Boyd's close friends.
"I know it was a stupid thing to do. I'm sorry, Mel."
She looked up from the glass of whisky which she had been slowly swilling as she thought over the situation. There was a look of genuine remorse in Boyd's eyes.
He rose from his chair and began pacing the room. Mel followed his movements with her eyes, concerned as he began talking, his words jumbled as he tried to justify himself.
"I'm sorry I did it, I'm sorry I didn't come clean sooner . . . I just, I couldn't let him get away with it like that. I know I can't make you trust me again, I just . . . I need you to believe me, I wouldn't do that again."
"I know, I trust you," Mel replied but he kept talking, kept pacing. He sounded desperate to prove himself to her, to atone for the damage he had done.
"I know I shout, and I get frustrated, I know I do stupid, stupid things sometimes, but I just want to get the job done. I want to put those people where they belong."
"I know, Boyd, we all know that, and we all want that too."
He stopped pacing suddenly and stared down at her. Mel held his gaze unflinching despite the blush she could feel rising in her cheeks. She wasn't sure why but she felt she was being scrutinized, that he was staring into her, trying to decided something.
"You still trust me, don't you?"
Mel opened her mouth to reply but before she could Boyd crouched down in front of her, removing the nearly empty whiskey glass and placing it upon his desk before taking her hands in his.
"It's very, very important that you can trust me. I don't want you to just say yes. Think about it."
His hands were wrapped around hers, unmoving as he waited for her reply, his eyes burning into her. Mel couldn't hold his imploring gaze any longer and had to look away, down at the floor. Boyd's sudden, shocking desperation was enough to make her feel very uncomfortable despite her previous experience of his often unexplained mood swings.
"I trust you," she said finally, looking up at him. His expression remained unchanged as continued to stare at her. He was close enough that she could see his chest rising and falling with each breath and Mel had the sudden urge to reach out and touch him, to reassure him that, though her faith in him had been shaken for a time, it had been reaffirmed by his eventual honesty.
"Promise?" he asked quietly.
"I promise."
Boyd gave a small smile and nodded once. He hesitated a few moments longer before eventually starting to rise to his feet. He was halted in his movements however by a gentle squeeze of the hands.
"Boyd, why it so important that I trust you?" Mel asked.
The piercing gaze that had earlier made her so uncomfortable dropped to the floor instantly and Boyd's words tumbled over each other as he spoke.
"Well, I'm your boss. I mean, you have to be able to, to trust me, to know that I'm not going to do something stupid. My team . . . has to be able to trust me in order to work well."
"That's rubbish Boyd," Mel replied quickly, spurred on by his sudden switch in temperament. He was hiding something, she knew it.
He looked up quickly, a confused expression on his face.
"What, what do you mean?"
Mel returned his earlier smile with a slightly sarcastic one of her own.
"Since when were you that bothered about what we all think? You just charge off your own and let us figure out what's going on along the way."
Boyd laughed quietly and nodded sheepishly.
"Yeah, yeah I know. Sorry."
"So, why the sudden concern now?"
He released his grip on her hands, running one through his hair with a sigh and an expression of discomfort. But, to Boyd's surprise, Mel reached out and drew his hand away from his face and held it in hers.
"You're an honest man, remember Boyd," she said quietly.
"I can't explain it, not properly. Grace is the one who deals with this stuff."
"What stuff?"
"I don't know. Psychological stuff. Feelings, emotions. I deal with facts."
Mel realised she was pushing into dangerous territory here and wondered whether she should simply turn back now. She could leave this room and this conversation behind her all too easily. Go out with her friends, have a night on the town and come back the next morning ready to face Boyd; bad tempered, irresponsible, Boyd. But that wasn't, she realised, exactly true. In her mind he was all those things, but more as well. Funny, protective and occasionally, just occasionally, he let her in and she saw the man beneath the title of detective superintendent. Despite her concern, Mel decided this was an opportunity she needed to grasp. So she challenged him, knowing he would take the bait.
"So don't explain, just show me."
Boyd returned Mel's challenging gaze for a few moments, seeming to weigh things up in his mind. Unsure what he was about to do, Mel waited patiently, unmoving until eventually he seemed to come to a decision.
With a hesitant movement and completely uncertain expression that Mel had never seen before on his face which was usually a picture of confidence, Boyd leant forwards. He halted an inch from her face, giving her the opportunity to back away or warn him off. Mel didn't move.
Boyd closed the gap between them, resting his free hand on the side of her face as he kissed her slowly. Mel returned his kiss, almost surprised at her own enthusiasm, closing her eyes and leaning into him. Eventually Boyd broke the kiss, but he didn't move away. This close to, his eyes betrayed his nervousness but there was a definite note of challenge in his voice when he spoke.
"How was that for an explanation?"
Mel laughed as the tension broke and felt him smile as he kissed her again briefly.
"It'll do I suppose."