Chapter 1- An Old Life Replayed

I'd never thought of myself as anything special, never strived to prove myself as something more. That's all I've ever been; myself. Now as I gazed at myself in the water I could no longer see what I used to be. My humanity had vanished along with every human trait that used to reside. Some things I wouldn't miss; my klutz-like tendencies, embarrassing situations I was the star in and such. Then there were the simple things I would forever hate myself for not enjoying. Sleep was much missed in my case. The ability to melt away into blissful unconsciousness was something I craved daily. And food; Blood was never a proper alternative in my opinion. It never tasted as good as it should have; not after….after Daniela.

I was curled up on the basement floor, unable to feel the prickling cold that should have been spreading on my skin. The only sounds around me were the gentle drip of water from the pipes and the scurry of spiders around the dark room. Oddly enough I was able to see everything just fine, if not better than when I had passed out. Or maybe unconsciousness was judged by the inability to think, rather than the atrocious pain I had gone through for days. After that experience I would say they both qualify.
Aside from the bright colors and attuned senses I felt nothing different. Except a burning sensation in my throat? Well I was parched, that was to be expected. Oddly enough I didn't feel hungry but my thirst was starting to get very painful and my throat felt scratchy and dry. I pushed myself off the ground but there was a sudden crunch as concrete buckled under my touch. I looked to where my hand was. A hand print had formed in the small pile of broken concrete. My hand prints to be exact. I was sure I should have wobbled back, stunned but I gracefully took a few steps back and found myself at the back wall of the basement, the opposite of where I had been a second ago.

Was it me or had I just blurred as I moved, as if I had walked superfast? I shook my head; my thirst was making me delirious. Even so, I took small, sure steps toward the unfamiliar staircase. Did I mention everything was unfamiliar here, in a house that wasn't mine? I could smell nothing which was odd; this abandoned house smelled like rotting wood and decaying animals why should that change now? Now an odd itchy feeling was spreading on the roof of my mouth. Then I realized…I wasn't breathing. Hurriedly I inhaled and exhaled several times until my breathing increased to normal. I ran to the sink, not caring about the gray water and splashed myself in the face many times. I must be sick.

My realization didn't matter; a runaway couldn't go into a doctor's office for a checkup. I would have to fend for myself, steal some Tylenol or something from an unsuspecting household. I would be fine. My hands groped over where my scar should have been the one that ran from my eye to my chin; an old reminder of my abusive mother. There was nothing but smooth skin. I felt the other cheek. It too was clear of marks and it seemed pimples too. Had puberty suddenly finished with me?



I started panicking. I didn't feel sick or wrong just different. That's what scared me. I tried remembering any earlier feeling's of illness from the days before. I could vaguely remember stealing some food the other day, but from where? And hadn't someone visited weeks ago? But who? My lack of memory was terrifying. I had no sense of what I had done or who I had seen recently. Did I fall, maybe hurt my head? That would explain things perfectly but that would also mean I would definitely have to see a Doctor. Maybe Daniela could help me?

Daniela, who was Daniela? Her name had just floated in my brain but it seemed to mean something. I felt a rush of gratitude, loyalty and love towards the name. No, not a name, a girl. My best friend. My memories of her at least did not escape me which was more than I could say of even my parents. My mother used to beat me as far as I could remember, and my father was never home. I felt emptiness at the thought of them. Siblings, no I had none but that fact did nothing to shadow the rush of loneliness I felt at that thought. Daniela had only been able to come over so many times, a sibling would have been welcome in my life.

I stood up properly and walked away from the sink, almost knocking down the tin cans behind me. A large collection of litter shattered to the floor as I turned the other way, I jumped at the ferocity that the sound engulfed me in. Was it ever that loud? The burning scorched my dry throat and I opened a small cupboard to grab a water bottle. With shaky hands I tried to open it, instead my hands broke it apart and water came spilling out of the top. I threw my head back and swallowed as much water as I could. The burning intensified instead of diminishing and I spit all the water onto the filthy kitchen floor. It had tasted disgusting, revolting to say the least and had done nothing to quench my thirst. I slumped down onto the floor, cracking some of the tiles and cried. Something was wrong with me, and that inevitable thought brought along an anguished sob. No tears seemed able to escape my eyes which confused me even more. I needed to know what was happening, and I needed a family to help me through it.

She had been my best friend, my sister when I was in need of family. She hid me on days when my mother grew too drunk and father too violent. She never told anyone about my parents. We both agreed Child services were not an option.

I got up and splashed through the water causing my face to vanish. How I hated that face, my beautiful flawless face. It just showed how inhuman I had become, I hated every inch of it. This was the face that had killed Daniela.

I don't remember how long I sat there and cried tearlessly but the sun rose and set before I heard a sound. It was far, far beyond the house's walls but my ears somehow heard it. I was filled with hope so I did not bother to try to understand how I could hear such distances.

"Becca are you there? Please, please be there!" Someone was whispering by the front gate she seemed to be whispering to herself rather than me. "The police are coming by here today; I need to get you somewhere else."



Police, they were something to fear I gathered. Letting memories flow I remembered the uniformed people intent on finding me and returning me to my home. No, that place was no longer my home. When I had left through my back window I had banished any thoughts of home forever.

I jumped up, being careful to balance my weight, so the tiles only groaned instead of breaking. I walked as fast as I could towards the kitchen door. I had stopped breathing again, but something stirred behind the uncomfortable lack of oxygen. A craving? A want? I had no idea what it was but I was too excited. There she was, Daniela. Waiting at the door in her white parka, her long black hair stood everywhere and I gathered it was a snowstorm outside. It occurred to me then that I wasn't cold in my shorts and T-shirt but this too I ignored. Her eyes were alight with joy and she was bouncing up and down in excitement. It had been what, two, three weeks since we last saw each other. You would have thought she was six, not sixteen the way she was acting.

I was still in the kitchen, as I took this all in so I walked forward to open the door I kept locked. She had a bag, of food for me I guessed but what happened next I would have never guessed would happen.

How could I have done that? Torn her blood from her body and sucked her dry like an animal. I was a vegetarian in my human life; was I a cannibal now?

Her blood was warm and pulsing, I could hear it. I breathed deeply and her scent hit me like a wrecking ball. She was no longer Daniela, my best friend. She was an animal, my prey and I was a predator. I ran forward dragging my feet through the floor with a crash. A slight glance in the side mirror told me later that I looked wild, crazy but then I didn't care. Her eyes now filled with uncertainty she took a step back.

"Becca, what's wrong? Are you sick, do you need help?" She was worried, and scared. That would make her blood all the more enjoyable. I didn't answer I just grabbed her and spun her like we were dancing. Then my teeth made contact with her neck.

She had screamed, over and over loud enough to awake the neighbors who were still minutes' walk from here. I heard nothing then, except for the rush of her blood as it entered my mouth. It was delicious, better than anything I've ever tasted! My brain was wild, my thought's whirling. I couldn't stop, I didn't want to. Her blood was hot and rich filled with an unexpected sweetness. There was no way I could compare it; neither it to food, nor anything in my life I ever tasted. Pleasure exploded in my body as I felt her body go limp and her screams stop. There was still blood left but it was getting cool, I must drink it fast before its cold.

Soon I had to force the blood out, it became elusive. In the back of my head I realized I had almost sucked her dry. Only when I had finished did I realize what I had done.

That day I had killed the only person in the world who had truly cared about me. I had tortured her with pain and in the end she had floated off to the waiting arms of death. I barely registered her death then; sirens had started a block away heading in my direction. I left her body and ran. Through 

the bricks, through trees outside till I was deep in the forest. The sun never touched me but the shadows wrapped themselves deeply near me. The trees became my safe haven. This all happened four months ago. The memories were as clear as if it had happened right now. Every day was a constant torture for me.

I tried to run but for vampire it was pitiful. Four months I had gone with no blood. Neither animal nor human had come near me and I had forced myself to stay in the exact spot where I had run that night. No one had found me, hopefully they all stopped looking. I was weak and could barely lift myself off the ground sometimes. I was hoping I would die.

Little did I know, vampires could not die that easily. From what I gathered out of books and movies, sun could kill me. I was far too weak to run to sunlight and no light ever penetrated the trees roof. I had even gotten so frail I could not lift or break the tree like I could the concrete. It was a pitiful existence and I wished every second that it would end.