The perfect happy ending
Ichimaru Gin, is being released from his imprisonment today. It has been a hundred years since they locked him up inside the 5th level of the central underground prison for the crimes of soliciting and aiding the criminal Aizen Sosuke. The truth is, he isn't ready to face the world yet, hundred years isn't long enough to heal the wounds he had helped inflict on the people of soul society. He thought maybe this early release is another part of his punishment. He wouldn't put it past the central 46.
Matsumoto Rangiku was standing under a tree, just outside the gate of the central underground prison. Its midday, the sun is up and she wanted the shade while she waited. It has been few hours, they haven't told her the exact time but she waited a hundred years, few hours won't matter much.
When he came out, he looked a little disoriented. His usually squinted eyes squinted more in the light. It has been hundred years he has been outside. It took him a while to adjust to the light.
First thing he noticed was that woman standing under a tree few meters away, looking at him. He wanted to smile at her like he used but something stopped him. Maybe it's his guilty conscience. He walked slowly towards her.
"Rangiku-san."
She was watching him approach her, looked at him intently with no smile for him either. "Gin. You look skinny."
This time, He smiled. "But you haven't changed at all, Rangiku san. Still as shiny as the sun". This smile was different. He looked different. There was something honest in there. He sighed. "Why are you here, Rangiku-san?"
She kept quiet and looked at him with piercing gaze. He smiled again.
"Let's go", without waiting for his response she started walking. He followed.
He was walking by her side now. She noticed how his pace has slackened. He is wearing a cheap kimono and sandals and various old scars on his face. She assumed they made him surrender his zanpaktou and all he was allowed to leave with were the clothes of his back. She had a feeling that it might be hurting him to walk, he looked extremely weak and tired. She didn't want to think about what he had been through in the prison.
Only their footsteps on the stony path could be heard. She noticed how his constant smirk is gone from his lips. He looked like a broken man. Her heart felt heavy.
"Gin."
He looked up and smiled. For a moment the old Ichimaru Gin appeared in his place. "Are you okay with walking?"
His smile widened. "Oh yes, Rangiku san. Don't tell me you are worried about the little old me? " she could see his teeth.
She felt irritated. When will he ever change? She gritted her teeth and said, "You don't change, do you?"
His smile left his lips, "Maybe it's better if we don't change Rangiku san."
Something about that sentence hit her like an arrow. She wanted to run and hug him. Comfort him and tell him that he isn't alone. But she couldn't.
"Were are we going Rangiku san?" he looked around, it looked like the way to Rukongai.
She halted for a moment, and turned towards him. She was never known for her ability to hold in her emotions.
"Gin. There are so many things I want to ask you." Her left hand was at her chest. Lightly touching the necklace she was wearing.
"You're still wear that old thing, Rangiku san. I always thought you should wear something more expensive", he smiled widely.
"Gin. Listen to me"
"I'm listening, I'm listening" he white flagged.
Rangiku is growing impatient. She felt a lump on her throat. "Gin. I… that day… when I found you... when Aizen tried to kill you… "
"Rangiku-san." he wasn't smiling anymore. He looked very sad. He kept his eyes locked on the road and said firmly "Let's just forget about all that. You don't need to live in the past any more, do you? Let me go, live your life. You didn't need to come here for me"
"But I did. I needed to come here. I needed to see you" the lump on her throat is getting bigger. She doesn't know how long she can hold it in. She can never forget the feeling of seeing him lying almost dead. "I can't... I still can't get the image of you lying there out of my head, Gin. Why did you do all that? For me? Why Gin"? She grabbed his left hand with both of her hands and rested her forehead on his arm.
Gin looked hurt and confused. He wanted to comfort her, but he doesn't know how. He's not sure if he even has the rights to.
"Rangiku san" his voice sounded so soft and sad. It made her want to cry. She didn't move her forehead that rested on his left arm.
They stood there for like few minutes before she pulled her self together and let go of his arms.
"I'm sorry" she said curtly. And started walking.
Gin followed. He felt physically incapable of carrying this heavy burden of guilt. Knowing she was hurting from a distance was one thing, but facing her in this state was too much for him. He remembers the look on her face when she found him lying on the rubble bleeding, the way she kept calling his name and crying loudly, and the way she quickly stopped his bleeding by healing him with her kido. He was much too weak to speak but he wanted to tell her he's sorry he failed, he wanted to tell her how much she meant to him. Most of all he wanted to say "thank you, Rangiku, for being in my life". He was physically incapable of doing so.
That was the last time he saw her. He was sent back to the squad 4 under high security and then sent to the prison. His attempt of killing Aizen was verified by few of the people and shinigamis who were present there, which reduced his sentence drastically. But a hundred years was a long time. He learnt to keep these memories hidden away. But now she had to come and face him again.
It still puzzles him to see how she keeps coming back to him. Even after all he's done. He never believed anyone could want to be with him after being pushed away so many times.
"I don't hate you Gin" she said suddenly, keeping her pace steady.
He looked up to her face. She's was looking at the road ahead.
"I don't hate you either Rangiku san."
They took a break under a tree near the river after a few miles. He looked very tired. She wanted to ask him if there is something he needed. But decided not to. The least she can do is let him keep his dignity.
Gin sat with his back against the tree and looked up at the sky. "I have never realised the sky was this blue" he said suddenly, with a smile on his face.
Rangiku was surprised. He was never the kind to start talking about things like that. She saw his hands are shaking a bit.
"Are you feeling okay Gin?"
He turned his head towards her and smiled. "I am. I am feeling better than I have felt in the last hundred years, Rangiku san. Thank you" he smiled.
A thank you from Gin. Nah, people do change. If he didn't, that means he was always like this, but no one knew.
"You can lie down a bit. We still have the better part of the daylight left". Rangiku said pleasantly.
"I think I might take you up on that offer Rangiku-san". He looked very tired. He moved a little to lie on the grass. Under the cool shade of the tree he closed his eyes a little.
He woke up when the sun has half way down towards setting. He found himself resting his head on Rangiku's lap, while she was dosed off with her back on the tree.
The next few minutes he stared at her face from her lap. She was the only thing that was constant in his life. The people he killed, the lives he ruined, the fact that he almost died was worth seeing her here, healthy. Whether she's happy, he doesn't know. He didn't know how to make her happy. All he wanted to do was what he thought was right. Nothing mattered to him, except the anger he felt when he found out what Aizen did to her. He never wanted to see her like that again.
Was it hard for him to stay away for her? It wasn't really. She was out of his reach to begin with. Pushing her away was basically the only good thing he could do for her. He closed his eyes and let out a loud sigh. He felt her move.
Rangiku dozed off a bit under the shade while waiting for Gin to wake. She saw how quickly he fell asleep. Even when she pulled his head towards her lap, he didn't wake.
She placed her hand on his forehead and he looked at her. She smiled. "You fell asleep Gin. You must be really tired."
Gin's face was still. He didn't move his body but reach out and touched the hand she had placed on his forehead.
"Rangiku san. Why are you here?"
She didn't know how to answer that. Why is she here? Why does she always find her way back to him? The little time they spent at the little shack was a long time ago. It never should have mattered to her. But it did. She followed this invisible string that attached her to him. And whenever he left her, she felt it pull her harder. All the sake in and world can never heal that pain of attachment.
"I don't know Gin. I don't know how to leave like you do" she signed.
Gin was looking at her with his eyes open. He kept his hand on hers. Maybe there is something called love. Maybe she really loves him. Despite of all the reasons to not to.
He sat up. She brought some food in her bag but she didn't really get a chance to offer it to him before. She took them out now and gave them to him. He ate them like a hungry beggar.
When he finished he looked at her with the sweetest smile and said, "I haven't tasted anything this good in the last hundred years"
"Was it hard, the prison life?"
"You can't blame them, we ARE all bad people in there ya know" his smile widened. But she looked hurt.
"Do you think, if you had never met me, things would have turned out better for you?" she said hesitantly.
Gin sat there in silence. He knew he hurt her and now he knows how deep it went.
"Don't we need to go somewhere, Rangiku san?"
The dusk still hasn't set in when they have arrived at their old shack. But it's not a shack anymore. It looked like a small cottage. Rangiku lead to the door. It was small, tidy and plain. There is a kitchen and a bathroom. It was furnished with all the things necessary for someone to live comfortably.
"My friends helped me get this place tidied up. I thought you might like it here." She said distractedly. He looked at everything and but all he could do was look. He never expected this much from her, the person who had the most reason to see him suffer.
"I thought it would be better if you stayed as far away from seireitei as possible. At least for now. There still are a lot of people who won't like you hanging around. Otherwise I would have taken you to my quarters. There are extra rooms there."
He wanted to tell her she has done enough. She has done more than enough. But all he could do was to look at her face.
"I know you didn't ask for anything, so don't think I'm trying to tie you down or something. I just thought... I just didn't want you to live on the streets that's all. It's for me actually. I won't be able to sleep knowing you're out there on you own. You did save my life once." there was a touch of guilt in her voice.
"There are some food on the kitchen. I have stored enough to last for a while. But I 'll come by to check on you, to see if there is anything else you need."
He sat down on the bed. It felt soft as cloud after sleeping on a pallet of hay on a stone floor for 100 years.
"Okay. If there is nothing more, I will go now" she figured he was too tired to talk, she should let him rest. It was a long walk and he didn't seem physically strong enough to do that.
"Rangiku san" she looked at him. He looked very sad.
"I don't know what would have happened if I had never met you. But because I did, I am here right now. I would do anything and kill anyone to be here right now, with you. Would you please stay with me tonight? "His voice sounded sad and tired. There was this yarning in there. She silently wiped some tears off her face and walked towards the kitchen.
When she woke up on the floor, next to the bed Gin was sleeping, she felt there was something different about her. First time in a long time, she did not have nightmares. And she was completely rested after that peaceful night of sleep. He was still sleeping with all his hair on his face. The hundred years in that awful prison hasn't changed any of the shine of that hair. She wanted to touch it, but instead he placed her hand on his forehead. She wanted to check to see if he's alright. He woke up instantly.
"You're up!" she smiled. "Let me see if I can make some breakfast". She was about to leave when he grabbed her hand.
"Rangiku san". He moved his blanket a bit. "Come lie here with me, like we used to the last time we were here together?"
She didn't know what came over her, and she witnessed her body following his request and tucked herself under the blanket next to him. She felt his arms wrapping around her waist as he pulled her closed to him, and rested his face on her cheek. "You still smell the same" he said softly into her ears. "Like the flowers I used to tuck in your hair".
She felt warm blush in her face and wanted to say something before sounding too awkward. But he interrupted.
"Rangiku-san, I have no right to ask you for anything. But would you stay with me? I just want to lie her with you quietly."
She wrapped her arms around him and realised how skinny he is now. She made a mental note to feed him well.
"Gin. Is your revenge over now?" she asked the first thing that came to her mind.
He lied there quietly with his face buried in her hair. "No". Her body stiffened a little, until he continued.
"I still have to make up for all the times I made you sad and unhappy, Rangiku-san. I still have to take the revenge on my own sins"
"Does that mean, you'll leave again?" she asked.
She felt his facial muscle twitched into a smile on her neck. "It means exactly the opposite. You might wanna get used to me hanging around you now. Who knows, maybe you'll soon start begging me to leave."
They lied there, in each other's arms. That moment, Matsumoto Rangiku forgot about all her responsibilities, her sufferings and his past deeds and decided to stay there in the moment forever.
She is finally happy. He is too.
If it wasn't for Captain Hitsugaya Toushiro somewhere in the office of Squad 10, who was cursing his vice-captain for leaving all the paperwork for him, it would have been a perfect happy ending.
The End. 2/6/2013