Glass Hearts
Prologue
When glass falls on the ground it shatters into a thousand pieces. Fragmented crystals glimmer as they steal the light and scratch the air with splintering cries. They collapse inwards, circles of slither slight shards bursting and their violent explosion leaves them in piles of barbarous dust… Just like the way your eyes cave inwards on tape as my father leans forward to whisper in your ear… Something unheard on the camera-lens but so transparent in those dark, hurt orbs that I love so much. The bruises, the blood, the livid red records of the torture inflicted on your perfect body; these are nothing compared to the broken fragments in your beautiful eyes…
I used to look at you and smile, even though you couldn't see how much you made me feel… I used to watch you as you spoke with Lana, as I sipped at one of her (not-quite-cappuccino) -cappuccinos… You always gave her this look that I wished could be mine… But I knew never could be… It was so sad, yet so beautiful to see you follow her every move with such innocent passion… Just like my not so innocent eyes on you. Each full, half moon smile made a strange joy flutter across my skin like autumnal leaves on the earth; because you were so pure, so innocent, so naïve and hopeful it wrenches at my heart to see you now.
Do you remember the meaning of hope now? Or rescue? Or joy? Do you remember feeling safe? Or how to trust like you used to? Or even how to smile that precious way that only you can…? Has the brute that is my father taken every dredge of your innocence from you? Are you still my Clark Kent? The man that saved me from a car deep under the river's waters, rescued me as I placed myself in the hands of Earl, preserved me in your loyalty and infinite belief in the good of others. Does that man exist? Or has he been stripped bare of dignity and optimism completely?
Clark, I can't promise you complete freedom, but I can promise to get you away from the monster that is Lionel Luther. I can't promise to heal you of all your scars, but I will try. God will I try…
This tape will be burnt, it is sickening to imagine my father watching his own cruelty on tape, but I know he does. He taped me once… As my happiness was stolen, as I lost my mother to her cancer. He doesn't even deny his lust for blood and the shadows on his face make his sunken eyes feral. A veneer of sanity over the real madness, glowing each time he reduces someone as strong as you to something as fragile as crystal… Just like glass, just like your eyes, just like my heart; his façade breaks when the insane glean conquers his soul.
But with so much shattered, like the silvery shards on the floor and decorating my raw fist, I don't want our friendship to have done so too. And I'm sorry I left you for so long. And I'm sorry I didn't see this any sooner. And I wish I could have saved from this punishment before it happened… But I didn't think and I need you to forgive me Clark. Because for all my distance and aloof exterior; I love you.
Strange though it is, that a man like I can love, it is true. It was shocking and terrifying for me to come to terms with but I know it to be as real as your blood as it trickles down your cheek; a single, ruby tear. For once in your life, you need salvation - not me. I need to save you. Then something catches my eye.
Green rock.
My father's hands are gone from your battered body. Men are closing in and your body sags as blood begins to flow from wounds that seemed closed. Pulsating green rock. The meteor rock from dreams and nightmares; in each of the faceless brutes' hands. Your eyes drift shut, teeth grit and the blood still carves up the ragged, bruised skin. The crimson rivulets seem to be flowing in time with the rhythmic vermillion light. What have they done to you? Why do these rocks hurt you? One drags his shard down your throat and you moan, torment lining your face. Veins in your neck taught and peering closely I can see them crawling with a strange life that I know is slowly killing you.
I always knew you were different Clark… Is it this inexplicable horror the truth that you hide? Oh yes, I know you don't tell me everything. It pains me, but I try to except that you can't tell me the absolute truth. I've seen the way you look to your father, as if asking permission to say something. Every time I've seen his imperceptible denial of your wish and I've noticed your eyes mist with a hurt that is only a shadow of the agony that is a part of you now. Your weakened body, your shattered soul is so transparent as another knife-like meteor slices across your shoulder, down your arm. And for the first time on this recording I hear you scream, see tears rolling unchecked on your face. Unearthly, animalistic, crazed…
I feel heat stinging in my own eyes. For the first time in nearly eleven years I realise I am crying. Crying for you. Crying for your pain. Crying for the unjustified torture. Oh Clark… I'm so sorry… I love you… I'm so sorry…> Next chapter is Paper Dolls! Hope y'all like this! xxxx