title: ding, ding, ding!
You spend a lot of time wondering about the black haired woman sitting by the bar. She's different. Special somehow. You wish you could remember. You wish, not for the first time, that you didn't have to forget all the people you judged.
…
Miss Nona passes through on an inspection. She pauses next to the black haired woman, smiles at her before sitting at the bar. You busy yourself with finding the ingredients for the drink she wants. When you set the drink in front of her, Miss Nona looks back to the black haired woman.
"Another," she says, "for her. She appreciates good alcohol."
As you pour another and Miss Nona lifts her glass, you think: who is this woman, and why is she so important?
…
Memories flash through your mind. The first set is unremarkable.
Nakahara Chie. A woman, a mother. A child just born, one living abroad, another in college. No husband, no lover. Supportive friends. She spent most of her life trying to work enough to live comfortably while supporting her children.
You're intrigued by the second, Hamasaki Etsuko. A woman, a dancer. She spent most of her life twirling across a stage in high heels. No love life to speak of. No pets. Strong connection to her parents. She died in a car crash caused by Miss Nakahara. Also unremarkable.
Watching memories of Miss Hamasaki dance stirs something deep in your chest. You aren't sure why.
…
"Welcome to Quindecim. I am your bartender, Decim."
Your brief smile causes Miss Hamasaki's eyes to light up. You aren't sure why. Her obvious cheer is still there when you explain the rules, even when you imply death as a consequence for not participating. The other woman, Miss Nakahara, is terrified. Miss Hamasaki pays her no mind and readily presses the button.
The roulette stops in the bottom right corner. Bowling. Light flashes and smoke wafts through the room as the bowling alley appears. Miss Nakahara shrieks in surprise. Miss Hamasaki's smile doesn't waver.
…
The game ends in Miss Nakahara's favor.
She doesn't seem to notice. Her legs are splayed awkwardly on the floor, hands planted on the ground, eyes hollow. Many people scream and cry when they discover that they've died. Miss Nakahara appears to have gone into shock. Miss Hamasaki congratulates her, helps her gently to her feet, leads her to the elevators at the end of the hallway.
"Which one?"
You gesture towards the one on the left. She gently places the woman on the floor, leaning her head against the wall. Miss Hamasaki steps back out of the elevator, bows as Miss Nakahara looks up at her with blank eyes. The elevator snaps shut with a quiet 'ding'.
…
Miss Hamasaki ignores the other elevator and walks back to the bar. She glances at the black haired woman by the bar and chuckles before sitting down. You follow after her and wordlessly step behind the bar. She hums thoughtfully for a moment then says, "Memento Mori, please."
You turn and reach for the various ingredients you'll need.
She looks around the room, expression nostalgic. Her eyes stop briefly on each of the dummies in the room, lingering longest on the black haired woman. You wonder: does Miss Hamasaki know her? Then you think: that's impossible, the black haired woman has been here for at least two centuries.
You pour the drink into a martini glass. Miss Hamasaki touches the bottom of the glass, smiles and says, "This is my last one, huh?" The words ring through your head like bells. You've heard them before. Somewhere. She holds the drink up to the light, twisting the glass carefully back and forth to make the liquid tumble over itself. "Do not forget that you will surely die someday, and as such, that is all the more reason to live now." She looks to you with a grin. "Right?"
"Correct." You watch as she takes a sip of the blue liquid, rolling it over her tongue. Her expression softens into pleasure. "Might I ask you a question, Miss Hamasaki?"
"You may."
"Do you know the woman sitting by the bar?"
"Hm… You could say that." She pauses, takes another sip of her drink. "Yes, I do know her. Quite well."
"She has been there for over two centuries."
"My, how time flies." Miss Hamasaki put down her glass, smiles at you. "You may want to pour another drink. Miss Nona will be dropping by shortly."
As if on cue, the elevator opens with a 'ding'. Miss Nona walks down the hallway towards you and takes a seat beside Miss Hamasaki. She puts a hand on your guest's shoulder. They exchange smiles. "It's good to see you, Chiyuki. Had a nice life?" You pour another drink.
"I was a dancer again this time."
They chat about commonplace things. Miss Hamasaki speaks about her career, her friends, her experiences. Miss Nona speaks about Klavis, Ginti, Quin. She explains some of the new changes she's implementing. You stand passively off to the side, listening with interest.
…
Eventually, Miss Nona jumps down from her chair. "I suppose I should get back to work. This place doesn't run itself." There's obvious reluctance in her voice. She grins at Miss Hamasaki, an odd note of fondness in her eyes. "See in a few years, Chiyuki. Don't rush back."
"Of course not. See you, Miss Nona."
…
"So," she says, tapping her finger on the edge of her empty glass, "figured it out yet?" In the background, the elevator closes behind Miss Nona with a quiet 'ding'. You pour her another glass.
"Miss Nona calls you 'Chiyuki'."
"Yes."
"You have been here more than once."
"Yes, again."
"You know the black haired woman."
"True enough."
Miss Hamasaki stands up and walks over to the black haired woman, takes her limp hand. For a moment, you see double. You think: they look terribly similar. And yet, they're nothing alike. Everything from the hair down to the shape of their hands is different. Truth clicks into place.
"You were the black haired woman."
"Correct. I was, am Chiyuki." Her voice is soft, almost longing. "I spent ages here. As your assistant. My judgement was extended. I taught you some things about being human... Your smile; that was me. On my last day here, my last day as Chiyuki. You smiled as the elevator doors closed."
"I am terribly sorry. I don't remember."
"I know. It's the rules. You made a dummy of me, and then you forgot. I must admit, I was a bit disappointed the first time. I got over it."
"I see." She walks back to her seat, heels clicking along the floor. "Might I ask another question?"
"'How do you remember?'" You nod. "Well. It's partly because I've been here so many times. I tend to die young. And because Miss Nona keeps my memories of this place. All of them, from every life I've lived. Or more specifically, of every time I died and came here."
"You have previous memories."
"Yes. Of the time I spent here, in Quindecim, as Chiyuki. Then later as Hanna, Ai, Rei, Kaede, Saeko, and now, as Etsuko."
"Do you always end up here?"
"Here as in Quindecim, or here as in the Hall of Judgement?"
"Both."
"I once ended up in Ginti's bar before I was redirected here. Miss Nona wasn't pleased. She had to sort out the whole mess, get me reassigned properly. As to your other question... I'm not entirely sure. I don't remember any of my past lives, beyond what they did in this bar. Miss Nona might know."
"I see."
"See, there's something I haven't done yet. I'm sure of it. I think that's why Miss Nona keeps my memories of Quindecim, why she keeps sending me back here." Her thoughtful silence seems to indicate that the conversation is over. "Or maybe this is just how things were meant to be."
…
"Hey, Decim."
"Yes?"
"Dance with me before I leave."
"I'm afraid I don't dance."
"You do. You always say you don't, and we dance anyways. Every time except for the first."
"What happened the first time?"
"That was a rather hectic day. You watched me skate, among other things."
"I see."
"I've been a skater, a dancer twice, a gymnast, once I died too young to become anything, then I was an inline skater, and a dancer again this time around. But even when I wasn't a dancer, I always remembered the steps."
"And we dance."
"We do."
"Very well, Miss Chiyuki."
You step away from the bar and take her hand gingerly. Your fingers fit together like interlocking puzzle pieces. Her hand wraps around your shoulder with practiced ease. The piano starts up a slow melody as she pulls you into a dance that you find curiously familiar.
…
"It's been fun, Decim. I'll see you again in a few years."
You return Miss Chiyuki's smile as the elevator doors slide shut.
"Please take care."
…
A few weeks later, you go back to wondering about the black haired woman.
A few months later, Miss Nona stops in and shares a drink with the black haired woman.
A few years later, the black haired woman returns to Quindecim and the cycle begins again.
But that's a story for another time.
1. chiyuki always orders a memento mori when she comes to quindecim. always. bc it's the end, but it's also the beginning of another end. it's a reminder that she's dead, but she will live again.
2. nona probs stops by on "inspection" every few months, bc decim makes rly good drinks and also she enjoys messing w/ him. ginti isn't nearly so much fun. and klavis is too much of a puppy dog, he just sits there and takes it w/ a smile. and augh, that's just so boring. also decim always goes through the same motions of wondering why the black haired woman is so important, bc every time nona comes back he's forgotten.
3. i firmly believe that chiyuki and decim are bffs and will actually remain that way forever. the hard part is that chiyuki remembers everything that's ever happened between them, decim doesn't even remember who she is. and that hurts, sometimes. bc chiyuki is only human and yes dammit, she'd like to go do fun things w/ her best friend. but she can't 'cause whenever she sees him she's dead and he has no memories. it sucks.
4. i bet a few centuries after this, chiyuki rides the elevator up to nona's place and asks her to recover decim's memories. nona makes no promises, but she'll try bc honest to gods she has such a bit soft spot for chiyuki. like, a soft spot the size of jupiter. so nona judges her and sends her on her way to her next life. and the next time chiyuki steps into quindecim, the next time she sends off a guest and wanders back to the bar, decim smiles at her and she knows that he remembers. they hug, they dance, chiyuki cries just a bit. nona doesn't show up that time.
an: the ending of death parade killed me utterly and completely. oh my word. but i guess it didn't quite feel complete to me. so this is my take on what happens next.