Wizards of Waverly Place
Drugs and Other Lust
It had been three days since the events of "101 Days of Wizards," and the Russos had just returned home with their new member of the family. Little did they know just how much another member, well, since Alex was dead, it's just a replaced member, of the family, could change their lives so much.
They had just gotten back into the loft with what luggage they could save. "Uh, finally, we're home." Said Theresa as she hugged the couch. "Finally, we have a couch to sit on that isn't sitting on a sidewalk."
"Ya, can you beleive none of those buses would give us a ride just because we had no money." Stated Justin as he threw his bags on the table.
"Maybe it's because of how we were dressed." Said Max. "I mean, you and your stupid bird watching outfit, dad and his filthy shirts, and mom, well you know."
"Ya." Said Theresa, not even looking up.
"Well, all that matters now is that we made it home alive, well most of us." Stated Jerry. "It would have been a lot easier if those crazy stalkers didn't follow and shoot at us for over fourty miles. Anyway, we have to get back to normal, and solve our present problems."
"Can we unpack first, I need to find my peroxide before my hair goes dull." Said Zoey as she pulled her hair in a braid.
"Fine, Justin, here, take your bags to your room." Said Theresa.
"What, my room's not big enough for two people, which, with Zoey, we now need." Said Justin.
"I don't know, don't you think after all that's happened, you should wait a while before you start sleeping together?" Asked Theresa. "I mean, your sister just died, we lost most of our material posessions, plus we have almost two weeks of laundry to do." She said as she held up a bag of laundry.
"We'll get it taken care of Mrs. Russo, now that I'm living here I plan to be a fully contributing member of this family." Said Zoey.
"Good Zoey, here, take these bags to the guest room, that's big enough for two people." Said Theresa.
"Uh, these are heavy, ha Max, I'll give you a new dime if you carry these bags for me." Said Zoey in a sweet voice.
"That little money? No way, give me a nickel." Said Max.
"Fine, here." Said Zoey as she handed him a nickel and two bags.
"Thank you." Said Max as he started to walk with the bags. "Uh, heavy!"
"Okay, let's all just sit down and get to the matter at hand." Said Jerry. "Now, let's think about what needs to be done, we need a new source of income, because I burned my sandwitch certificate. Anybody?"
"Oh, I got it!" Yelled Zoey as she raised her hand. "I heard about these people who have sex and get payed for it, that sounds fun, what was it called, whoring." She said.
"Ha, I heard the rate of whores in New York is really going up in respondance with the number of incoming immigrants." Said Justin.
"No! Nobody in this house is becoming a whore! If there's something this family needs, it's to do something straight forwardly and honest, no hand outs or body selling." Said Theresa.
"Ha, what if we made a porno movie, we could be stars and never have to leave the bedroom." Stated Zoey.
"Ya, I heard people who starred in the movie, "In the Bedroom," got nominated for Oscars, that could be our big break." Said Jusitn.
"Great, I'll be Sissy Spaceck, and you be any other guy who was in that." Said Zoey. "But, we would need more than two people, so who wants to volunteer?"
"Me!" Yelled Max. "Wait, what does porno mean?"
"No, we are not making a sex tape, don't you have any ideas that don't relate to sex?" Asked Theresa.
"No, I don't know how to do anything else, cashiers have to remember where buttons are, and shephards have to wear those robes, and those do not go with high heels." Said Zoey.
"For now let's just get unpacked." Said Jerry as he pulled out a snow globe and put it on the table. "I'm done."
In the bedroom, Justin and Zoey were thinking hard about the need for money. Neither had any clothes on for they had just had sex. "That was hot, ha, we should get a job having sex with people, they would pay through the nose, and other places, to get us." Suggested Zoey.
"No, we tried that already, ah, I used to be such a great thinker, now I'm tapped out of ideas. Ha, what if we invented something that people need, like a shirt that turns inside out so you can wear it two days in a row." Suggested Justin.
"That's brilliant, do we know anybody who knows how to sew?" Asked Zoey.
"So much for that." Said Justin.
"We should do something, not a business, but just an on and off service thing, which makes a lot of money when we do it, the only question is, what? What do people like to do sometimes, but not all the time, and would pay a lot for it?" Asked Zoey.
"I don't know, how about a..." Started Justin.
"I've got it, we'll have an orgy, people love orgys." Said Zoey.
"Here, that would be something easy and cheap, anybody who's anybody would come." Said Jusitn.
"Ya, singles, married couples, married people without their spouse, co-habitants, anybody with a wallet and, well you get it." Said Zoey. "Think of all the possibilities, group sex, one on one, three ways, wild, dirty, could mix, match, let's do it now!" Yelled Zoey.
"Wait for the paying customers, but how would we ever get my parents to agree to it?" Asked Justin.
"Let them in at half price, but once they've come, they'll be back for more." Assured Zoey.
"Alright, let me write all this down." Said Justin as he looked for a pen. "Eh I'll remember it." He said as he layed down again.
The next day, Theresa was sipping some tea from a pack while sitting at the counter. "This is aweful."
"Alright mom, we just came up with a full proof way of making cheap, fun, and completely honest money." Said Justin.
"That's great, but I have a feeling that it's something stupid." Said Theresa.
"Ha, what kind of food do you serve at an orgy?" Asked Zoey.
"Something hands free." Said Justin.
"No, no orgys, why is this so difficult?" She demanded.
"Ha, I found the job of my dreams last night, it's a job at the bowling alley, I get to hand out shoes, tell people what to pay, and other things, but I get to do it all at my favorite place, a bowling alley, isn't that great?" Asked Jerry.
"Dad can you convince mom to let us have an orgy?" Asked Justin in an annoyed voice.
"What, for me, ah you shouldn't have, how'd you know about my new job?" Asked Jerry as he hugged Justin.
"It's not for you Mr. Russo, it's to raise money for the house, but your wife doesn't like it." Said Zoey.
"We are not going to have people pay to come and have sex in our living room, it's wrong, and pretty disturbing." Said Theresa.
"I'm with your mother." Said Jerry.
"Dad!" Screamed Justin.
"Mostly because I'm too excited for conflict, now I found a way to make money, so should you." Said Jerry.
"Oh, why does this have to be so hard, why can't things ever go easy for us?" Whined Zoey. "I'm so upset, let's go cuddle Justin.
"Wait, once we solve this problem, then we can cuddle all we want until something else comes up, which usually takes at least ten hours. So for our own good, we need to think of a way to make money, and then we can be happy, for the moment." Said Justin.
"Fine, hu." Whined Zoey as she sat on the couch.
"Well, my shift starts in twenty minutes, see you guys." Said Jerry as he left.
"Ha, you guys seen dad?" Asked Max who had just walked in.
"He just left for his job Max." Answered Theresa.
"Ah, I wanted to congradulate him on his bowling job, ah." He said as he sat next to Zoey.
"Hu." Whined Zoey as she handed Max a tissue.
At the bowling alley Jerry was happily at work in handing out shoes and taking money. "This is the greatest job ever. Why didn't I burn my diploma a long time ago?" He asked himself.
"Ha, can I get a size ten shoe?" Asked a man who came to bowl.
"Size ten, wow you got big feet, I wear a size six, ha!" Laughed Jerry.
"Ah!" Cried the man as he ran out in tears.
"Weirdo." Said Jerry.
"Ha, three please." Said a man who came with his two daughters.
"That'll be fiteen thirty." Said Jerry as he rang him up.
"Here's twenty." Said the man as he handed Jerry the bill.
"Uh, here keep the change." Said Jerry as he handed him a ten dollar bill.
"Uh, thanks." Said the man as he left, confused.
"Ha, can I get a size eight shoe?" Asked a man who walked up to the counter.
"Ya, here ya go." Said Jerry as he handed him a pair of shoes.
"These are size seven." Said the man.
"Is that my problem?" Demanded Jerry.
"I guess not, I'm sorry." Said the man as he ran to his lane.
"Ha, I love this job." Said Jerry.
Later that day, Justin was walking down the streets of New York when he came up to a young couple who was sitting on the porch of their apartment. "Come on, why don't we get intimate?" Asked the woman as she rubbed the man's chest.
"Na, not right now." Said the man as he looked over some papers.
"Come on." She moaned.
"Ha, why won't you have sex with your wife!" Demanded Justin as he walked up to them.
"Hu?" Said the woman in great confusion.
"I don't know, just don't feel like it." Said the man.
"Well, why not, it's something that everybody likes to do, come on." Said Justin.
"I'm just not in the mood right now, I'm, sorry." Said the man.
"Phh." Said Justin as he walked away.
"Why didn't I marry him?" Asked the woman.
"Ah don't be like that." Said the man.
At the house, Zoey was looking over a magazine and talking to Theresa, who was not enjoying her company. "Mrs. Russo, what if I wrote a book, with all the things Justin and I do when we have sex, what about that?" Asked Zoey.
"No, can't you think of anything but sex?" Asked Theresa in an annoyed voice.
"Why would I want to?" Asked Zoey in a confused voice. They just stared at each other, and Zoey went back to her magazine.
"Ha mom, ha, girl who doesn't wear a lot of clothes." Said Max as he walked in.
"Her name is Zoey." Said Theresa.
"But you can call me that." Said Zoey as she read her magazine.
"Ha, I've been looking all over New York City, not a freakin' place wanting to hire a ship unloader." Said Justin in a shocked voice.
"Bastards." Said Zoey sympathetically. "Justin, what if we wrote a book, about anything but sex?"
"We don't have a typewriter." Said Justin.
"Ya, and ink is too expensive, uh." Groaned Zoey. "I need a brake, how about it Justin?"
"I don't know Zoe." Said Justin.
"Well, I made this cracker, with a lot of ingrediants I'm not sure of what they are, and it makes you want to have sex just by eating it, here." Said Zoey as she handed him the cracker.
"Wait, people will want to have sex, even if they're not in the mood, just by eating this cracker?" Asked Justin excitedly.
"Yes, but it's also to enhance what you already have, whatever that means." Said Zoey.
"This is it, this is it!" Yelled Justin.
"What?" Asked Max.
"We can sell these crackers to people who can't have sex on their own, but really want to, they'll pay a fortune, like these losers I met today." Said Justin enthusiastically.
"Ya, what do you say Mrs. Russo?" Asked Zoey.
"Well, fine, as long as it doesn't bring a ton of people to my house. Said Theresa.
"Great, find me the recipe, and I'll call a company, this is great, ha!" Yelled Justin as he ran off.
"Ya by." Said Zoey, who had been eating crackers since before Justin came home. "Mm, Mrs. Russo?" Asked Zoey as she put out her hand with a cracker in it.
"Nno." Said Theresa as she went on drinking her tea, suspiciously.
That night, Jerry had just come home from his job to dinner. "This was a great first day, the job is easy, and the money is good. So how was your day?" He asked the family.
"Fine, my Justin came up with a great way to make money." Said Zoey.
"Really, how's that?" Asked Jerry.
"He wants to tell you himself, which is good because I can't remember what it was." Said Zoey as she ate a cracker. "Mm, Max want to take a nap with me?" She asked dreamily.
"No thanks, I'm not tired." Said Max.
"Guys, I got a company to sponsor the project!" Yelled Justin as he walked in.
"Are you serious?" Asked Theresa in a confused voice.
"Ya, they said it's a can't miss idea, and the world can't live without it." Said Justin.
"What's that?" Asked Jerry.
"Well, Zoey made a cracker that makes people want to have sex, no matter how much they don't want to, and we're going to sell them everybody." Said Justin.
"Oh, that's right, ha ha." Said Zoey as she put her hand of Jerry's.
"Uh." Said Jerry as he pulled away. "I am so proud of you, I always knew you'd make something useful." Said Jerry. "I gave out thity pairs of shoes today, now I'm proud of me."
"Ya, and once we sell those, we can work on our other project, a flying boat, so we can cruise, fly, and have sex at the same time." Said Zoey.
"Well, at least it makes money, whatever I can do to help, I'll do." Said Theresa. "Ha, got any of those crackers?"
"Ew." Said Jerry as he started to eat.
"Nope, all gone." Said Zoey as she licked the box. "So who's tired, I am."
"This is insanity." Said Justin.
The next day, the Russos had just arrived at the company that had agreed to work with Justin on his new invention, and they were admiring the business. "Wow, look at this place, they got tables, chairs with no tape on them, and lights that don't give you a headache from the noise." Stated Jerry.
"Ya, Justin how did you find such a prestigious place to give you money?" Asked Theresa.
"I just went out with the idea, and pretty soon all these companies were bidding to endorse it, and this place won." Answered Justin.
"Think of it Justin, when we sell this thing we're going to be helping a lot of people. I mean, all those people who just are too illusterous and dull to make love will be able to lovers to nearly a level as high as ours, and it's all thanks to your business skills and my act for chemistry." Said Zoey.
"Wait, what exactly did you put in those crackers?" Asked Max.
"Well, a little bit of everything, some pumpkin spice, some sort of cleaning solution, cinnamin, love cinnamin, and whatever was lying around getting dried out in the vegetable crisper." Answered Zoey.
"Sounds pretty stable to me." Said Max. "How much money do you think this will make us?"
"Max, something like this will be so popular that the money we make will need to be measured in a whole new digit not yet disvovered by man!" Proclaimed Justin. "I don't know, think a couple thousand at the least."
"Thousand? Wow, my dad never made that kind of money, he only made, like seven hundred a year." Stated Zoey.
"Wait, seven hundred, then how could you afford to go to boarding school?" Asked Theresa.
"Oh, school only cost four hundred, that's less than seven hundred Mrs. Russo." Stated Zoey in a laughing matter of fact voice.
"Ah, why didn't I catch that earlier?" Asked Theresa sarcastically.
"Hello, are you the Russos?" Asked a man who walked out. He had dark brown hair, which was nearly black, was thin, the same height of Jerry, in a blue coat, white button down shirt, he had grey slacks and a striped dark blue and pink tie, and looked like a pleasant, but serious business man.
"That's us, I'm Justin, that's my mom Theresa, my dad Jerry, my brother Max, she's Zoey, she's not a Russo, we just sleep together, she invented the cracker, my sister's name is Alex, she's not here because she killed herself at the bird sanctuary, and I'm Justin." Answered Justin.
"Ah, well it's nice to meet you, and I look forward to doing business with you. I'm here to help with financing and other business aspects, shall we step into my office?" Asked the man.
"Sure, this place is way too fancy for me." Said Jerry as he got up. "I like that tie, where'd you get it?"
"Oh, at the office depo, they go on sale this Thursday." Answered the man.
"Oh, I don't like it enough to buy one." Said Jerry.
"Ah, let's go." Said the man as they walked into his office. "My name is Simon, you can call me that, my last name, it's better if you don't know."
"Good, I don't even remember what your first name was." Said Zoey.
"That's alright, he'll work with us at a pace so that we can understand everything about this whole ordeal, right!" Asked Justin in a frantic voice.
"Uh, yes, please don't worry, now, let's start out with this product of yours, this is a project, an edible product, which people eat, to, uh, in a real sense, uh, enhances, uh..." Started the man.
"It's a cracker that makes you want to get f*** up." Said Zoey in a blunt and some what frustrated voice.
"Yes, thank you for that outright description description." Said Simon.
"Sir, I am willing to assist in this project, and I assure you that I am much more relatable and trustworthy than she is." Said Theresa.
"Thank you Mrs. Russo, but you will not be needed in this operation." Stated Simon.
"What?" Asked Theresa in a shocked voice.
"Ha ha!" Laughed Jerry.
"In a franchise that is just starting out, the best way to sell is to have the original inventors at the head of it, and that they both be esteemed and capable salesmen, so it is my first duty to make this young lady the most intellectual and compotent worker in this city, or die trying dammit!" Declared Simon.
"I didn't understand hardly anything he just said." Stated Max.
"Me neither, but, sir, is this going to be painful?" Asked Zoey, who had a purse in her hands, which most didn't notice until now.
"For you, no, for me, most likely yes, but that's my job, making sure products like this get out on the market, and assuring that they will be sold to make our green earth that much more efficient, or in this case, hornier, Zoey Brooks, are you willing to change everything about yourself in order to make cheap labor free money?" Asked Simon enthusiastically.
"Yes I am!" Declared Zoey as she smashed a vase with her hand. Justin got a cloth and used it to clean the blood from her hand.
"Alright, be here promptly at seven thirty tomorrow, and we'll make this happen." Said Simon.
"Yessir!" Yelled Zoey as she got up, soluted him, and left the room.
"What about janitor, I could be the janitor." Said Theresa.
"Thank you, we have slaves for that." Said Simon.
"Bu, bu..."
"Let's go Theresa." Said Jerry as he escorted her out.
"Well, if I can't help with this, I'll find my own way of making money, one bigger and more profitable!" Declared Theresa.
The next day at 7:31, Zoey walked into the door of Simon's office. "Sorry I'm late, there was a delay on the subway due to road conditions in the North East, I decided to start on some research methods before our lessons." Stated Zoey in a professional voice.
"I'm glad to hear it, devotion will be a key aspect of the next few days, for you will learn how to memorize, prioritize, deal, gamble, you'll learn how to sort, memorize, you'll learn everything from memory to memoranda, shall we begin while the day is new?" Asked Simon.
"I beleive we should." Said Zoey.
"Good, now please, step into our training room, if you will." Said Simon as he opened a door on the left side of his office. It was a room with white walls with a conspicuous hint of purple, in sporatic splotches, but white nonetheless, comlimented by pillars of the same design, which were held at the top and bottom by dull yellow stell designs, and the floor and ceiling met the walls with papering of red outlines, and inside were a white background with purple designs, the floor was marble, and had red carpets in well suited places, and it contained three chairs. This truely was the most sophisticated place Zoey had ever layed eyes on. "This is the place where we will mold you into the woman you require, you will come to be burdoned and bored by this place. You will come to hate it, but after long you will love it, and will be dissapointed when I tell you our final day has come, but that matters not, now, are you ready to put your old life to rest, and build a new one?" Asked Simon in a serious, but gentle voice.
"I'm ready." Aswered Zoey in a sort of nervous voice.
"Good, please take a seat in this chair." Said Simon as he seated himself in a chair that faced the one he had signaled to diagonally. Zoey seated herself as ordered. "Now, let's start out simple, let us examine this book." Said Simon as he took out a large book, which was brown, had an old look to it, and contained no title. "This is the novel Emma, one of the most prestigious books ever written, we need not read it, but mearly examine it. It is a tale that defines life in the nineteenth century, if one wished to discover that era properly, they turn to this novel, we must understand how to personify your product into the actual topic of sensuality, so that in the dictionary of the minds of our consumers, under the word sensual, this product will be listed as a synonym, that is the first thing you must understand in order to assist with this operation, are you ready?" Asked Simon.
"Yes." Answered Zoey.
"Good, and this is not all you will learn, you will learn about many things, how to present yourself, how to speak fluently, and so forth, but enough time for talk, let us begin." Said Simon as he turned over an hour glass, which measured much more than an hour. The sand ran. Over the next few days, Zoey learned from Simon all aspects of business, and how to live and portray business as a human being. Set to light classic piano music, Zoey sat in the same chair, looking over classic books, posters and other objects of importance. She also did many exercises, such as breathing exercises, walking with a book on the head, and public, confident speaking. She read and memorized key aspects of business, and releived tension by standing on her head, leaning her back against the wall while Simon looked over his literature. Days passes, twenty two to be exact, and finally, she walked with Simon into the room on the twenty third, to have this conversation. "Zoey, you have come a long way since we met, you've learned much have you not?" Asked Simon.
"Yes." Answered Zoey quietly.
"Yes, so much, that you must already know that today will be the last day we come into this room, today it will be locked up, until another comes along like you, wishing to learn, but after today, you, and your partner Justin, will join me in the office, to layout your product, for this room has only been a place of preparation, and now, you are ready." Assured Simon.
"Thank you Simon, any and all success that I can acheive in this, will be thanks to you." Said Zoey.
"Thank you, shall we meet, tomorrow at nine?" Asked Simon.
"Yes, we'll see you then." Said Zoey as she exited the room.
"Yes, farewell, till then." Said Simon as he closed the door.
The next day at the house, Zoey and Justin were preparing to leave for the meeting with Simon when Theresa walked in. "Simon doesn't want me to work with him, well it's his loss, I just launched a whole new company that'll drive his company into the ground! It's an escort service, that matches people with escorts their friends will beleive would actually date them, what does Simon have to say to that?" Demanded Theresa proudly.
"He doesn't know, but I'll tell him and take along a tape recorder to record his laughing if you want." Stated Justin.
"Oh, make your jokes, but when the time comes around, and I make this family rich, I'll be the one laughing in the end, ha ha!" Laughed Theresa.
"Mrs. Russo, who do you have working at your service center?" Asked Zoey.
"Well, only a couple people, I don't know their names, but I'm going to print up some fliers and put them on the grocery stores, then they'll come. Have you seen Jerry?" Asked Theresa.
"Ya, he said he had to leave early to work, I guess today is the biggest bowling day of the year." Said Zoey.
"Oh, well if you see him, try to give the exact speech I gave you, but try to put in more feeling, I'll be out, see ya." Said Theresa as she left.
"Ha, where's mom going?" Asked Max as he walked down the stairs.
"She went to put up fliers for her crazy mid life business thing." Asnwered Justin as he packed up.
"Ha, Justin, if your mom and dad are gone, and we're going who's going to watch your little brother?" Asked Zoey daftly.
"I'm fourteen, I don't need anybody to watch me." Said Max. "Ha, can I come with you, not that I don't want to be alone." Said Max quickly.
"Fine, just don't get in the way." Said Justin.
At the office, Justin and Zoey were looking over some charts while Simon spoke to them. "Now, we want to appeal to a universal crowd, see here." Said Simon as he pointed at the chart.
"Ha, this is a big table, do you eat lunch here, because you must have a big lunch." Stated Max.
"Max, we said if you wanted to come you have to be quiet." Said Justin.
"Oh leave him alone Justin, I mean he's so cute." Said Zoey as she giggled.
"What about her?" Asked Justin.
"Ya, there was some intellectual areas, we didn't have the time." Stated Simon under his breath.
"Ah." Responded Justin.
"Anyway, I was thinking, we should turn the cracker design, into a pill, so it's easier to store and preserves longer." Said Simon.
"A pill, I like it!" Declared Justin.
"Great, we'll have our accountants get to it immediately!" Said Simon as he banged his fist on the table. A bell went off.
"What's that!" Asked Max loudly.
"Earthquake!" Yelled Zoey as she grabbed Justin, jumped on the floor and threw him on her bag.
"Calm down it's just the twelve o'clock bell." Said Justin.
"Time for lunch." Said Simon as he pulled out a paper bag that was as long as a garbage bag and twice as wide. "Ha, I'm a growing man."
"Ah." Said Justin.
A few days later, Theresa was sitting in her office, near a dumpster in the city, when a nerdy guy walked up. "Ha, my reunion is in half and hour, and I told all my friends who beat me up and took my lunch that I'm married, I need a date!" Declared the man.
"Alright, keep your shirt on, please, bring out Claire!" Yelled Theresa to the back of the dumpster.
A woman walked out who was wearing a small leather top, had blond hair and was smoking pot. "Ha honey, where are we going tonight?" Asked Claire.
"Wow, she's perfect." Stated the man.
"Yep, and for five dollars more, I'll marry ya, uh, make it six." Said Claire.
"Have fun!" Yelled Theresa as he put the money on the table and left with Claire. "Ah, I love making people happy.
At the local store, people were lining up at the automatic doors to buy up the new shipment of the Over the Counter product, labeled Russo and Brooks' love pills. Justin, Zoey, Simon, Theresa, Jerry and Max were all there to watch it. "Wow, look at how fast it's moving, this is going to be a smash!" Declared Jerry.
"Yes, and at this rate we'll be getting corporate offers in no time." Declared Simon.
A news article came out a week and a half later, it was brown on the T.V and had an old time narrator. "This new product, Russo and Brooks, has been pulled from the shelves by thousands since it's release, and is being eaten up by all the big corporations, it has been anounced that it has been contracted to corporate sponsor EnRom, and is about to become an international selling item." Stated the narrator.
In a big corporate office in Newark, two men were looking out a large window in an office, one was an old bald guy with some white hair who looked like a frog with his yellow coke bottle glasses, and the other was an odd looking man with brown blond hair who looked just like Alec Baldwin. "I don't like it one bit Frederick." Said the bald man, who's name was John, Senator John Freidberg. "This new product could throw Flycon out of business." Something must be done." Stated John.
"Well we're not even sure if this will become a big company, we should just wait it out, and see if worst comes to worst." Stated Fred.
"Alright, keep and eye on that business, and tell me if anything comes up." Said John.
"Oh trust me, I will." Said Fred in a jovial voice.
"I, good." Said John.
At the house, Theresa was sitting at the table when Zoey walked down. "Ha, I was looking over some wedsites, and they all said that porno movies just need to have at least three people, and be at least eleven minutes long, so what do you say, hu?" Asked Zoey.
"Why would you make a porno movie, you already have a business that makes more many than my escort service, don't you remember?" Asked Theresa.
"Oh right, I should have been at work with Simon and Justin in the time I spent looking up this information." Said Zoey as she threw the papers on the table.
"Ha, I just got my paycheck from my bowling job, thirty dollars." Said Jerry as he threw it on the table.
"That's not very much, for a whole day?" Asked Theresa.
"What, this is for the whole month." Said Jerry as he put the check on the table. "Where's Justin, he said he'd help me paint the pipes in the basement, where is he?" Asked Jerry.
"Why are you painting the pipes in the basement?" Asked Zoey.
"Not sure, but I know it'll accomplish something." Said Jerry.
"Zoey, you didn't show up at the office today, you were supposed to show up at the office today!" Yelled Justin.
"Justin, you didn't help me paint the pipes in the basement like you said you would." Stated Jerry.
"I never said I'd help you paint the pipes in the basement, why are you painting the pipes in the basement, I didn't even know about this." Said Justin. "We have to be in early tomorrow so we can meet with government officials about our first grant." Said Justin.
"How early, noon?" Asked Zoey.
"No, no not noon, like, seven." Said Justin in a nervous voice.
"I can do eleven thirty, no earlier, look at all the information I got on this porno movie, I think we can really make this work." Stated Zoey.
"Ha, Justin where were you? You said you would help me with my paper I'm writing about you, who I admire most." Said Max.
"He probably never agreed to do that." Said Theresa.
"No I did, but I just really did not want to do that." Said Justin.
"Take that Mrs. Russo!" Yelled Zoey.
"Zoey, will you be there at seven? Ah forget it, I'll set up an internet conference for here, all you have to do is push a button." Said Justin.
"That sounds simple enough." Said Zoey.
"For you, probably not." Retorted Theresa. Everybody became silent.
The next day at noon, Jerry was at the bowling alley when the manager walked up. "Ha, I got some bad news, there's been some changes, and we have to let you go." Said the manager.
"Go where, be an ambassador bowling alley, guy?" Asked Jerry.
"No, I'm firing you, there have been some budget cuts, and since you've worked here the number of customers has dropped ninety nine percent." Stated the manager.
"Ha, I'm commited, with some time, we can hit one hundred percent, or even higher!" Declared Jerry.
"I'm sorry, pack up your things, uh..." Said the manager.
"Jerry."
"Ya I didn't take time to learn your name, I barely remember mine." Said the manager, who's name was Walter.
"Mr. Walter, can you sign for..." Started a salesman. The manager walked right past him.
Earlier that day at nine o'clock Justin had just woken up. "Uh, Zoey, what time is it?" Asked Justin.
"I don't know, nine." Said Zoey.
"What, why didn't my alarm go off?" Asked Justin.
"I turned it off so it wouldn't wake me up." Said Zoey.
"What, your room is all the way across the house, did you do the conference?" Asked Justin.
"No, I could not figure it out." Said Zoey.
"What, you had to hit one button, one!" Yelled Justin.
"Ya, but you never said which one." Stated Zoey.
"Ah." Groaned Justin as he fell back on the couch.
Three weeks later, Justin was walking with some men in a suit, and he had a suit on too. "I know the project is some what behind schedule, but I think we have to start on future goals." Stated Justin.
"Justin, tell them that we have to start on the plane." Said Zoey.
"Ya, I just did, this, is a flying boat, and they will be just as revolutionary as Diagrin, for it will be the biggest plane ever to fly." Stated Justin.
"Alright, but the government is asking questions, after all their four hundred thousand dollars has gotten us nowhere." Said a man.
"Tell them we need more time, and even more money." Stated Justin.
"Alright, I'll call them." Said the man.
"Good, at this rate we will be able to manipulate the entire U.S economy." Said Justin.
At the house five days later, Jerry was painting the pipes. "Uh, where is Justin, I can't do this alone, uh!" Groaned Jerry.
Six days later, Justin, Zoey, Simon, their new partner Jackson, they called him Odie, and Max, Jerry and Theresa were watching a screening of thier new porno movie. In it, a blond woman was leaning over a man in a hospital bed, she had a low cut shirt, and it was all in black and white. "This is a great movie." Said Theresa as she ate out of a bucket of shucked corn.
"Justin, this is rediculous, how can you make a movie that's all about tits?" Asked Odie.
"Who du'un like tits?" Asked Justin in a strange accent, and he had on a tan coat, hat, pants, and had a black mustace.
At the Civil Board of Censorship, five men sat with serious looks on their faces, including Fred and Senator Freidberg. "Mr. Russo, this film is an insult to American film culture, the provocative amount of clevage alone, I mean." Said the Senator.
"Well, Mr. Fredberg..." Started Justin.
"It's Freidberg." Corrected the Senator.
"Yes, but for all future purposes, you will be referred to as Fredberg, now, this is a misunderstanding in the censorship industry, for other movies, not questioned by this board, have displayed much, much more clevage, Simon." Called Justin.
Simon then walked out with a metal measure and several portraits. He put them out, all of clevage, and began to measure and compare. "This, 1993 film, seventeen, never in question, let us turn to ours, which had a measure of fifteen, three fifths, a..." Said Simon. Fred then began to get up but the Senator stopped him.
Four days later at the house, Jerry was video chatting with some executors when Theresa walked in. "Jerry, what are you doing?"
"Working out a profit margin, see Hanbook is coming along to be an extremely profitable business, and it needs to be made official, and that's what I'm doing." Asnwered Jerry.
"I, whatever." Said Theresa.
Five days later, Justin was watching the film in a dark studio when Zoey walked in. "Justin, what are you doing?"
"Looking over the film." Asnwered Justin.
"Justin, they scraped the film." Said Zoey.
"Zoey, sound, it's what the people want, don't even ask, one point nine million, we're doing it." Said Justin as he walked out.
"Justi, ah." Said Zoey.
One week later, Justin was watching the building of the flying boat when Theresa walked in. "Justin, I read that your pills were due on the market three weeks ago, what's going on?" Asked Theresa.
"Mom, that's old news, we need to look to the future, like this plane, look at this plane, hu!" Declared Justin.
Eight days later, Jerry was on the phone and he looked nervous. "Ya, I see, by." Said Jerry.
"Jerry, what's wrong?" Asked Theresa.
"Well, there was some trouble with the website, mostly how I stole the idea from some guys, and now they're suing me for fourty million dollars." Said Jerry.
"Well, would it help if I gave you my escort money?" Asked Theresa.
"Ya, it would." Said Jerry.
"Too bad, it was a question, not an offer." Said Theresa as she walked off.
Two days later, the whole family was sitting in the living room when the door was busted down, it was Senator Freidberg. "Justin Russo and Zoey Brooks?" Asked the Senator.
"Ya." Said Max and Theresa at the same time.
"We at the United Council of Products are suing you for theft of funds, we'll see you in court!" Yelled the Senator as he left.
"Ha, does it seem like the past couple months have been a bit off?" Asked Jerry.
"Ya, ha, that guy said he was suing us." Said Zoey.
"What, no, things were going so well, you and me, and now this comes along to ruin it all, uh." Said Justin as he slid on to the floor.
"Ha, if this lawsuit never came up, we'd have no problems at all." Stated Max.
"Ya, ha, you're right!" Declared Justin.
"Justin, why are you so happy?" Asked Theresa.
"Because, fate has been haunting us for our whole lives, and now it's layed itself into the form of an earthly thing, this trial. If we win this trial, that means we beat fate, and we will never be thworted by it again, so we have to put all of our power into winning this case." Declared Justin.
"Sounds good to me." Said Jerry.
"But, we don't know anything about courts." Said Zoey.
"Then we'll learn, nothing at this point is more important than this trial, so we are completely devoted to this!" Yelled Justin.
"Ya!" Yelled Jerry as he fell on the floor.
The next day, Zoey ran in with a book and some glasses on. "Justin, I found a book on how to win a court trial, we should use this!" Yelled Zoey.
"Great, okay, it says here, that fourty percent of the case is the character witness." Said Justin.
"Okay, we will buy the best character witnesses there are, money is no object!" Yelled Theresa.
"What money, what money!" Demanded Max.
"I got fifety million dollars from a lawsuit, okay, I owe fifty million dollars, what's the di..." Started Jerry.
"You don't buy witnesses, they're people who know you, and look at what we have to work with, a fired bowling alley clerk, a woman setting losers up with whores, and your idiot son. Alex would be the most profitable witness, but she's dead!" Screamed Zoey.
"Okay, what else does the book say?" Asked Jerry.
"Well, the opening argument is where the jury pretty much makes their decision." Said Justin.
"Okay, we'll spend all of our time writing one!" Yelled Max.
"Wait, then there's the actual trial, we don't even know what Senator Fredberg is going to pull up at the case." Said Justin.
"Well, we'll just have to find out." Said Zoey.
"But how?" Asked Theresa.
It was then that a shuttlecock flew threw the window. "Ha, there's a tape on it." Said Jerry.
"Put it in!" Screamed Justin.
On the tape, Simon was speaking to the camera. "I know about the trial, I can be your witness, but before we are interrupted, you must know about how to find his secrets, all the material you need is at the gadget store, very secret, all the information is on the note, good lu..." Said Simon.
"Ha, what are you do..." Started a man from off screen.
"Ah!" Screamed Simon as he dropped the camera, and it fell on a man who was just standing facing the wall.
"I say we go with it." Stated Justin.
"What do you think happened to Simon?" Asked Max.
"It doesn't matter, let's read those notes, anybody know how to read?" Asked Zoey.
"Me!" Yelled Justin as he picked up the note. Everybody left.
That night, they had just arrived at a shack outside the city. "Are you sure this is the place?" Asked Theresa.
"Sure, Simon explained everything, remember what I told you." Said Justin.
"Ugh!" Screamed Zoey.
In the bathroom, Justin was waiting in line for the stall, finally he got in. He closed the door and stood on the rim. "Hu." He said as he pulled the lever, then he was flushed down into the toilet. At the store, which is where the toilet led to, the Russos were confronted by a strange man.
"Ha, how did you find this place!" Demanded the man.
"A little birdie told me." Asnwered Justin in a serious voice. "Now, we need all of these items, or we'll tell everybody we know about this place." Said Justin.
"Ya okay." Said the man.
At the harbor, the Russos had just walked up to Freidberg's boat, Jerry pulled out a watch, pushed a button, it fired something, and the guard fell on the ground. "Success!" Yelled Jerry.
In the mainroom, they were reviewing the plans. "Okay, we need a microphone in the meeting room, we should be in to do that, three hours before the meeting." Said Justin.
"Alright, I'll do it." Said Max.
"No, this is all my fault, I'll do it." Retorted Zoey.
"No it's not, you didn't do an..." Started Justin.
"Just let her do it, this is insane enough without all the argument!" Yelled Theresa.
"Ha, what if they catch us putting the microphone in the meeting room?" Asked Jerry.
"They won't, they won't catch us, I mean, unless we do it, five minutes before the meeting." Stated Justin.
"Don't worry, I'll do it with hours to spare." Stated Zoey.
Five minutes before the meeting, Zoey was sitting on the couch and eating chips. "Zoey, did you plant the chip!" Asked Justin frantically.
"Damn, knew I forgot something." Said Zoey.
"Ah, well what do we do now?" Asked Justin.
"Okay, we have this, weird device thing, we use this to hear them, but you have to be within a hundred feet." Said Jerry.
"And it gets cut off by even the thinest of material." Said Theresa.
"Don't worry, I'll just scale the side of the boat, find the room, and listen with the machine, and take notes of everything they say." Said Justin.
"Sounds good, much easier than my job." Said Zoey.
"On the side of the boat, Justin had found the window, and had the machine all ready. "Alright, loud and clear." He said to himselft.
The men walked in, Senator Freidberg at the head. "Alright men, let's begin, you see at the ti..." Started the Senator as a man closed the shade.
The frequency went static. "Uh, hu." Said Justin as he inconspicuously tried to open the window and open the shade. He opened the window, a ton of water shot in and hit a man in the head, he didn't move, and Justin opened the shade. "Yes!"
"Okay, we see here, wait, didn't you close that shade?" Asked John.
"No!" Screamed the man who opened the shade.
Two days later, the family was sitting in the house, and Justin was reviewing the notes. "Justin, these notes are all upside down." Said Zoey.
"Ya, I was upside down." Said Justin.
"Here." Said Theresa as she took the notes, got on the couch and leaned upside down on the back. "It says, uh..." Started Theresa.
"He's mainly questioning the industry we represent, and his main weapon is that we've never output any functioning products." Said Justin
"Then we have to prove them wrong." Declared Simon. "But what can we finish in a week?" Asked Simon.
"The plane, we can finish that, but it'll take all of our effort." Stated Zoey.
"Okay, let's get to it!" Yelled Jerry as he ran into the door.
"What he said, only a little slower." Said Theresa.
At the trial, the Senator was making his staements while Justin spoke. "This is it, if the jury votes us innocent, fate will be thrown from our lives forever, and we can be happy." Said Justin.
"It might not be so easy." Said Zoey, who had a white sun hat, a dress, and had a small purse in her hands. "He seems to know what he's doing."
"Justin Russo." Said the Senator, who now had Justin on the stands. "How much money in total has the government given to your industry?"
"Thirteen million dollars." Said Justin.
"Yes, and what has your company put on the market?" Asked John.
"Nothing." Answered Justin. There was a gasp.
"Yes, this so called, Diagrin, a sexual aid, has never seen the light of day, from your labs, and we continue to lose money from it, we are suing, for the falseness, of your industry!" Yelled the senator.
"Senator, we are here to prove, that this industry, is a serious business, we have proof!" Screamed Simon.
"What, what has this company output, what have they built, with no products, you have nothing." Said the senator.
"He's got us there." Said Jerry.
"Ya, ha, what about the plane." Said Theresa.
"The plane!" Yelled Max, who, with the whole group, had on old time dress clothes.
"What, oh ya, we state, that our company, has finished production, of the H-9 Hawkules, or the Spruce Mouse, the largest flying object." Said Justin.
"Yes, this flying boat of yours, which most beleive to be a joke." Stated the Senator.
"A joke, but if we could acheive this, that would prove the realness of our industry." Said Justin.
"Your honor, we must request that Mr. Russo and Mrs. Brooks, demonstrate a flight of the plane." Said the Senator's lawyer, Gilmer.
"Hu!" Gasped the audience. Jerry slammed his hand on the table as he began to get up.
"This court will come to order!" Yelled the judge. "Mr. Russo, this audience requests the flight of your plane, will you comply?"
"Yes, I will." Asnwered Justin. He and Zoey looked nervous, John was snickering.
Five hours later, the plane was in a harbor outside New York, with Justin, Max, Zoey, Simon, Odie, Jerry and Theresa in it. It was massive, being a flying boat. "Are you ready?" Asked the judge from radio, just on shore.
"Affermative." Responded Justin.
"In an office all the way across town, John and Fred were listening to the flight over radio. "Fred, what will the success of this flight do for their company?"
"It will go international." Stated Fred.
"F***." Responded the Senator.
In the plane, Justin, Zoey and Jerry were sitting in the front of the plane, and the others were at the tables in the back. "Alright, set, and launch." Said Justin as the plane began to move. They went for hundreds of feet, but it had to make a turn, they stopped, the jury on the shore.
Zoey spoke to Jerry. "Mr. Russo, what is the wind condition?" She asked in a professional voice.
"Why mild and on the East." Said Jerry.
"Would you call that a headwind Mr. Russo?" Asked Zoey.
"Why, yes, I would." Responded Jerry.
Zoey told Justin, they pulled the levers, and began to move. "30, 40, 50, 60..." Read Odie as they moved. Justin began to pull up on the levers as Odie read on. "70, 80, 85."
"Come on." Said Justin as he pulled back on the levers. Soon the plane's nose went up, and it lifted out of the water. "Yes!" Yelled Justin.
The plane soared above the water, and the jury cheered. At the peir, Justin and the family were talking. "So, now that the company has decided to sell, we can afford to get the shop back, and get back to normal." Said Theresa.
"This is great, sure this may not have come as easy for us as it would for others, but look at what's happened." Said Jerry.
"Ya, fate won't slow down our lives anymore." Said Max.
"And now, we can finally be together, for real." Said Zoey.
"Ya." Said Justin as he pulled Zoey aside from the family. "Zoey, after all that's happened, all that matters is that we're together, winning that trip to PCA was the best thing that ever happened to me, it brought you to me, and now we have reason to go on, us." Said Justin as he held her hands.
"Glad to hear it, but what will this all change, I mean the fate thing?" Asked Zoey.
"Not a thing." Said Justin.
One week later, Justin and Zoey were at the house, and were talking. "So, if we want to do a porno movie, we need one more person, ha, how about you Mrs. Russo?" Asked Zoey.
"How many times do I have to tell you no?" Asked Theresa.
"As many as you want, but I'll still ask you." Said Zoey.
"Ha, going to paint the pipes in the basement, somebody should be at the counter." Said Jerry as he went down to the basement.
"Ha, where's dad, he said the health inspector was coming today." Said Max.
"Ha, no matter what he says, it's because of us, not fate." Said Zoey.
"I am so happy that our lives are now being ruined by our own choice." Said Justin.
"Me to." Said Zoey as she looked through the papers of the information sheet.
"Whatever." Said Theresa as she ate some crackers.
THE END