This is part of a Facebook challenge for the group RG Bronies. Look them up and join if you want. Also this stories title is much more thought provoking than the story really is. I had fun writing this. Now hurry, I have class in half an hour.
With Dreams of Love
RG looked at his reflection in the mirror. His black tux complimented his midnight blue coat as he adjusted his bow tie. He lightly brushed back his brown mane to make himself more presentable as he glanced at his trademark hat. No other filly would have allowed him to wear his lucky hat to the wedding, but he wasn't marrying a normal filly. He smiled proudly to the mirror before he put the hat on and quickly cleaned his glasses.
"I'm one lucky stallion." He said with a grin as he left the dressing room to await his future wife at the altar.
He lightly galloped down the aisle and took his place as he gave the pastor a nervous smile. As he looked around the church at his closest friends and family, each one giving him a smile of support, he knew he was doing the right thing. He knew this was the filly he wanted to marry.
As the music began, signaling the start of the ceremony, the doors opened to reveal the filly of his dreams, Rainbow Dash. Her wedding dress flowed about her perfectly, almost dream like. The white veil just barely hiding her beauty from the world as her white, near transparent dress in some places, allowed her cutie mark to shine through before it erupted into a beautiful silk rainbow that trailed behind her. Without trying Rainbow Dash had become the source of envy for every mare in the church.
She walked with a grace that was usually reserved strictly for her flight performances. All eyes were glued on her, but for once in her life Rainbow Dash did not care to boost, but stayed focus on the stallion ahead of her. A stallion who couldn't help but give a nervous shallow as he noticed the focused and yet gorgeous stare his future wife was giving him. She gave him a reassuring smile as she took her place next to RG.
The pastor began his traditional speech as the two ponies in love faced each other. RG heard little to anything the preacher pony said though. His attention solely placed on Rainbow Dash, who couldn't look him straight in the eye because of how embarrassed she was by his love struck gaze.
"I love you." RG whispered, just loud enough for Rainbow Dash to hear.
"I know." She whispered back. RG knew this was code for "I love you, too" because to say anything more might chip at the cool image that the rainbow mane pegasus tried so hard to maintain.
"If there is anyone here who would object to this union may they speak now or forever hold their peace." The Pastor said.
RG's hooves grew wet with sweat. Just a few more seconds and he would become his new life as husband to 'thy' Rainbow Dash, the mare of his dreams. Nothing could ruin this moment.
"I OBJECT!" A voice rang out through the church as the double doors were slammed open.
"What in Celestia's name?" RG nearly shouted as he looked at the door.
There stood Twilight Sparkle, dressed in a wedding gown just as beautiful as her friends. A hint of unicorn magic had been added to cause the dress to sparkle when in sunlight causing her to dazzle like a gemstone in the light that poured in from the open door.
"Twilight, what do you think you're doing ruining my wedding?" Rainbow Dash hissed at her friend.
"I'm objecting to this wedding, what else?" The purple unicorn answered back in a matter of fact tone.
"Is this some kind of a cruel joke?" Rainbow Dash asked as the despair in her voice began to creep up.
RG couldn't help but feel for his wife. He knew Twilight Sparkle was a bit eccentric at times, but this was just out of character for her.
"I object, because the groom promised to marry me next week!" She declared. A rush of shock cascaded across the once peaceful church.
"I did?" RG asked himself out loud.
"You did?" Rainbow Dashed asked him, her face contorted in shock.
"He did!" Twilight Sparkle shouted to answer them both.
"But I don't remember…" RG began.
"How could you forget?" Twilight Sparkle cried as she rushed towards the groom before collapsing at his hoofs. "Were all those kind words you said to me a lie? Were all those sleepless nights we spent watching the stairs mean nothing? Did that magical night we spent together in my bed mean nothing to you too?" She asked, her face burning up with embarrassment with each question.
"Twilight, are you saying what I think you're saying?" Rainbow Dash asked as she unconsciously began to take flight due to accumulating stress.
"That's right!" Twilight Sparkle shouted as she stood up and held RG's head to her chest, "I'm RG's baby's momma!" Another wave of shocked exclamations ran through the church as Rainbow Dash grabbed RG by his left hoof and began pulling.
"Well to bad for you egghead, but he's marrying me."
Twilight pulled back on RG's right hoof, "No, he's marrying me."
"Hmm, beg your pardon." A third, more western voice, chimed in. "But RG promised he would marry me."
"Applejack!" Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle shouted in unison before they both glared at RG.
"I promised no such thing." RG protested in his defense. After those words a large dark shadow enveloped RG from behind. The dark blue pagasus suddenly felt very small as he turned around to face the large and menacing frame of Big Mac.
"You calling my sister a liar?" He asked in a rather intimidating voice.
"No" RG stammered out.
"Then you admit you promised to marry her?"
"No, I made no such promise." RG said defensively as she slowly began to back away from the angry, red, earth pony.
"So you're calling her a liar?"
"No"
"Either she's lying or not, which is it?!" He finally shouted with Fus Ro Dah strength knocking the smaller pony to the ground.
It was at that moment that RG realized his predicament. He was talking about the Element of Honestly, the most loyal and truthful pony in Ponyville, maybe even all of Equestria. If she said he promised to marry her, he probably did, even if he couldn't remember when. As he looked up at Applejack, dressed up in her mother's old wedding dress though not as flashing as Rainbow's or Twilight's just as pretty in its simplicity, she blushed as his stare and RG couldn't help but admit there was a part of him that wanted to marry the orange earth pony.
"I guess I did promise to marry her." He finally confessed as he slowly stood up.
Applejack slowly walked up to him, her head down in a light blush, "I never thought I was anypony special. I never thought I'd be special enough to catch the eye of a stallion that's for sure, but I'm happy to know it was you, thank you."
"S-Sure." RG blushed, taken back by her sincere confession.
"Of all the worst things that could possibly happen this…IS…THE…WORST!" A shrill voice shouted as Rarity, dressed in a fabulous dress encrusted with gemstones rushed inside. "I turn my back for one minute one to discover my best friends trying to steal my fiancé."
"I beg your pardon?" Applejack questioned with a look of scrutiny.
"RG proposed to me dear and I have proof. Here's the picture of him popping the question at or dinner at Le Restaurant chic." Rarity said as she produced a photo of RG on his knees with a wedding ring.
"You promised to marry not only me, but three of my friends?" Rainbow Dash asked RG with a disappointed frown.
"Don't forget me!" Pinkie Pie shouted as she appeared behind everyone else in a pink gown.
"Not you too, Pinkie?" Applejack asked in a near hopeless manner.
"Yup, he even baked me a cake to propose to me and hid the ring in it. I end up eating the ring and then we had a wait a while for it to come back out, but RG was nice enough to not got mad and of course I said yes." She enlightened her friends on her story.
Her friends eyed her, knowing full well that Pinkie Pie's story were longer than that.
"Oh, I have RG's bun in my oven too." She finally added.
"You too?" Twilight asked her pink friend.
"Yup, me too."
Now RG was very confused. He had allegedly asked these five mares to marry him and even got two of them pregnant yet he couldn't remember doing any of this. It was getting pretty bad now that all five were fighting. Wait, isn't there supposed to be a sixth?
"Hmm, excuse me. May I have everpony's attention, if that's alright with you?" A timid voice called out.
Fluttershy was standing at the door of the church as she slowly walked in. She didn't wear a wedding dress, so this was a good sign to RG.
"Fluttershy, don't tell me RG promised to marry you too?" Rarity asked she approached her friend.
"Oh no, nothing like that." Fluttershy answered.
Everypony breathed a sigh of relief. The last thing they needed was another mare in this crazy situation making matters worse.
"No, actually RG promised to marry Angel here." Fluttershy said as she held out the bunny rabbit who was dressed up in a mini wedding dress.
"WHAT!" RG shouted. No amount of drugs, alcohol, doppelgangers, and time travel could explain this.
"Well what's it going to be RG?" Rainbow Dash finally asked.
"Yes darling, whom of us do you love the most? Just hurry up and pick me so we can solve this whole problem." Rarity said.
RG was slowly surrounded by the six mares. Each one expecting to name them as the mare they he loved the most, but he just didn't know. How does one simply pick the best pony?
"I love you all!" He finally blurted out.
The answered silenced everypony in the building as the six mares just blushed at his candid reply.
"That's a nice answer." Rainbow Dash said, "but not good enough!" As he and her five friends jumped RG.
"Well this is my wedding so I'm getting married." Rainbow Dash declared as she grabbed RG's right front hoof.
"Well I'm carrying his foal." Twilight Sparkle declared as she grabbed the groom's left front hoof
"Well he proposed to me first!" Rarity shouted as she grabbed a hold of RG's left back hoof.
"Well he's the only stallion who ever loved me." Applejack protested as she grabbed his right back hoof.
"But if you all marry him Angel will be sad." Fluttershy disputed as she grabbed RG's head.
Each pony began pulling the poor stallion in each direction. They were going to break him. Utterly rip him apart. He needed somepony to save him. Anypony. Wait a moment. He was being pulled by five mares. Where's Pinkie Pie?
"This isn't working." Twilight confessed after the brief tussle.
"You're right, but we can't all marry him." Rarity added.
"Why don't we split him?" Applejack suggested.
"Brilliant idea, but how do you propose we do that?" Fluttershy asked.
The load roaring sound of a chainsaw woke RG from his mild stupor as he looked towards the sound to see not Pinkie, but Pinkamena revving a chainsaw.
"Leave that to me girls. It'll be as easy as making cupcakes." She said sadistically as she brought the whirling blade down towards RG. He struggled as best he could, but could not pull free of the grip all these crazy mares had on him. In fact, to his horror they were urging Pinkamena on.
"Wait, girls don't you think this is too drastic. Allow me to explain." He pulled again at his body as he tried to get away from the machine of death, but it was no use. The chainsaw plunged into his limbs slicing his pony limbs off one by one. The pain shooting through his body as his blood sprayed across the statutes of Celestia.
"AAAAHHHHHHHHH!" He screamed as she shot up in his bed, drenched in sweat. He brought his hooves up and started feeling across his body. Everything was there and intact.
"Did you have a bad dream, dear?" A honey like voice with just a hint of malicious intent asked him as it handed him a rainbow sprinkled cupcake… with a bloody cyan wing decorating its top. RG looked to the pony next to him, though in his mind he already knew who it was.
"Pinkamena!"
"Why don't you eat a cupcake to settle down?" Pinkamena asked as she seductively licked the blood off her knife before she stabbed him in the chest.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" He woke up once more in his bed. "It was just a bad dream."
"Are you alright, dear? You should drink a glass of chocolate milk. Does wonders for the nerves." A voice next to RG as the pony turned to face it the pony he was in bed with.
"Discord!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" He awoke from his dream with a start.
"RG, calm down. You were having a bad nightmare." The voice assured him.
RG turned towards it to see the face of his wife Rainbow Dash. "Oh, RD you have no idea how happy I am to see you. I had such a terrible dream. I just don't know what to do."
"Shh, it's ok dear. You don't have to do anything, but feed me." Rainbow Dash said with a slight seductive hint.
RG raised his brow, "You're hungry at this hour? Well what do you want to eat?"
Rainbow Dash slowly and seductively crawled on top of him. "You're love." She said before she transformed into Chrysalis, the Changeling Queen.
"What?!" That's when RG opened his eyes to realize he wasn't in his bed by was hanging upside down as he was slowly cocooned by the green changeling slime as Chrysalis laughed mocking his pathetic attempts to escaped.
"NOOOOOO!" He screamed only for his scream to be muffled by the slime as he was encased for the rest of his life.
"NNOOOOOOOO!" He bolted up in bed. "It was all just a dream. All just a terrible dream."
"What's wrong my love?" The much deeper male voice asked from besides him.
RG turned to face the brown earth pony and his life companion, Alex. A smiled crossed RG's face as he stared at the goofy face of Alex, light stubble growing the pony's face since he forgot to shave that day.
"Nothing that seeing you won't fix." RG assured his partner.
"Come here you." Alex playfully ordered as RG slowly began to snuggle up to the earth pony. "I love you RG."
"I love you too, Alex." RG answered back with a smile before falling asleep.
"NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" RG screamed as she thrashed bout in his bed. "Anything but that. Chop me up, make me a changeling love battery, I'll even marry Discord. Just anything, but that."
"RG, wake up. RG, wake up already." The honey like voice said.
RG finally opened his eyes as the sunlight him them. He looked about his room. It was morning and the room was just as he left it. He turned towards the voice that was trying to wake up him to see the bright smiling face of one of his best friends Palmetto. The brown pegasus and her trademark mane and tail which resembled a palm tree looked at him with concerned eyes.
"You ok. I came to get you and I heard you screaming so I kind of rushed in." Palmetto explained.
"No, I just had a crazy dream." RG said.
"What about?"
"I dreamt I was going to marry 6 mares and a bunny." RG answered.
"Six mares, sounds like a typical guy dream." Palmetto answered with a role of her eyes.
"But I didn't want to marry them. Well I did, but I didn't and then there was this chainsaw and…" RG never got a chance to finish.
"Again, typical guy dream wanting the girls, but afraid of the commitment. You disappoint me sometimes RG." Palmetto chastised as she left the room
RG felt his world shatter at that. He hated disappointing Palmetto. His eyes watered a bit as his lip quivered.
How could this happen to me, I made my mistakes.
Got nowhere to run, but life goes on
As I'm fading away, I'm sick of this life
I just want to scream,
"Oh sorry, left my phone in your room." She said as she walked back in and answered the device ending the song.
"Yeah, I'm at RGs. I know we're late, we'll be there soon, bye." She promptly replied as she hung up. "Come on RG. Get ready. We need to head out soon."
"What's going on?" RG asked, his mind not in its right state.
"Don't you remember. We're helping out at the charity ball tonight with the rest of the group." She explained.
"Oh yeah." RG answered as he stood up. "Been so busy helping with it that I forgot to even get a date for it, lol."
"Don't worry RG." Palmetto said as she opened the door and headed out first, "I'm in the same boat."
"Really?!" RG exclaimed as she rushed to his friend's side as blush crawling over his cheeks, "Hmm, well if that's the case I'd like to ask you something Palmetto."
End
NOT, because at that moment Alex the earth pony cut them off on his high powered gyrocycle.
"Foolish RG, do you think I would allow you to capture the heart of the lovely Palmetto without a fight?" Alex screamed.
"So it's come down to this? Alright Alex, I accept your challenge. Choose your weapon." RG shouted back in dramatic poise.
"I choose a card game… on motorcycles!"
"Of course, how else is one supposed to play a children's card game?" RG questioned out loud as he mounted his motorcycle and drove off.
And thus Alex and RG went on an epic adventure to find the rest of the Pony-signers and save Equestria from an apocalyptic future of exploding card games… on motorcycles and eventually forgot about poor Palmetto due to them developing permanent erectile dysfunction for everything except card games on motorcycles.
As for Palmetto, she was unable to find a date for the Charity Ball and was forced to go with Spike the Dragon where they would fall in love and eventually get married. Unfortunately the syndicate that Spike was working for eventually betrayed him and killed Palmetto causing Spike to enter an eternal emo rage as he then became an epic space bounty hunter kicking ass and being over all awesome throughout space.
Just kidding. Everyone lived happily ever after…
Except Spike.
Spike dies in the end.
REAL END!