Hold Me
Jen sat on the edge of the bed, brow furrowed in pain and concern, watching Nick pace back and forth. The bathroom door was ajar, and he opened it to slam it shut, causing Jen to jump slightly.
"He's gone now. I'm alright. Everything is fine," she said quietly.
"It is not fine!" he shouted, slamming his fist on the wall. He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. He didn't want to take this out on her. That was not at all what he wanted. "I'm sorry, Jen."
"You're upset," she replied sympathetically.
"No, I'm sorry for everything. This is all my fault."
Her immediate reaction was to be annoyed at him for his self-pity. But she honestly didn't have the energy to be cross. So she spoke in gentle tones and asked, "Why do you say that? Is it your fault we're undercover? Is it your fault I went to the shops with you today? Is it your fault I got shot?"
Nick finally turned to face her, the guilt and pain evident in his expression. "I couldn't protect you."
Jen almost laughed, but knew she couldn't do that to him. "Nick, we're cops. It's not your job to protect me. You know I can take care of myself."
He came to sit beside her on the edge of the bed and took the hand of her uninjured arm and brought it to his lips. "I know you can take care of yourself. That's why we're good together. There's no one I'd rather have standing next to me in a raid. But us, Jen. For us, I've made a vow to keep you happy and loved and safe for all our days. And I couldn't do it."
She put her head on his shoulder, nuzzling him affectionately. "I'm sorry I got shot. I'm sorry it scared you."
"Jennifer, I can't lose you again," he whispered.
"You won't. I promise you won't."
"You can't promise that."
Jen stood up to face him. She used her one free hand to tilt his chin up to look at her. "No matter what happens, I will always be around. You're the best partner I've ever had. In every sense of the word. I won't let anything take that away. Not the SIS or Homicide or my stupid feelings or even a bullet. My arm will heal. But I need you to stay with me. I can't have you assaulting people because you're worried about me. Don't go borrowing trouble. We find enough if it on our own."
Nick smiled. There was something so marvelous about the way she spoke when she lovingly scolded him like this. "I won't ever leave you, Jen. Nothing will take me away from you."
She nodded and the corners of her lips quirked into the smallest smile. "Good."
"Can I do anything for you? Do you need ice or painkillers or anything?" he asked with concern.
"Just hold me for a while," she requested, moving to sit in his lap as she'd done so many times before.
Nick gladly wrapped her up in his arms. He was careful to avoid her injury. They went quiet and held each other in silence. The sound of their beating hearts was enough to assure each other of what they needed.