I drink to forget. I drink to forget that I'm a humongous dick. I drink to forget why I'm pissed off. I drink to forget about him, the ignorant, scrawny little blonde with a penchant for getting under my skin. I drink to be happy, when in reality it only does the opposite.
I drink because when I'm shitfaced and can't walk in a straight line, that ignorant, little blonde never fails to be the one to find me and take me home, despite my false protests. I drink because I can be around him and talk to him and even be relatively honest without him questioning me because I'm drunk. I drink because being around him when I'm drunk is a lot less painful than when I'm sober.
I drink because I'm weak. I'm too weak to try and make sense of my emotions regarding this one scrawny blonde so I drink in an attempt to avoid thinking about him. Then, when I'm drunk, I can see him — which defeats the purpose and only adds fuel to my confused fire.
I drink because when I'm drunk, I don't question when he crawls into bed with me, even if it's only to make sure I don't do anything stupid to myself or others. I don't question his closeness. He doesn't question how close I get while I sleep.
I drink to forget, to forget that I have feelings for the stupid blonde, but I never do.
a/n: seiner is my #1 rarepair and i have at least a dozen oneshot wips that have been "in the works" for over three years. talk to me on tumblr as user nort-nort. comments and crits are always appreciated u3u