(A/N: Have fun reading! I had fun writing it. : )

"Best Day. Ever."

It was not a good day.

I don't think I'll ever look back on that day as a good day. I had a terrible hangover, a tattoo that read, "I love Pablo," and no clue where I was.

Once I was sober enough to stand, I tried my hand at walking. I slammed headfirst into a tree. I waited a while longer. A few hours later, I had fallen asleep, woken up, and tried to walk again. This time I was fairing much better.

I turned my bleary eyes towards a huge, towering wall. This wall was ominous, and was now a mystifying, antagonistic force towards me. I had no clue what was on the other side of that wall. For all I knew, the town surrounded by that tall wall could be a town of...

Humans...

Oh Mother.

There, sprinting towards me with a huge grin on its face was a human that was getting steadily closer. He didn't have any armor or weapons to speak of, and didn't look like much of a boxer, so I didn't knock his head off as he got within striking range.

The human male bellowed, "There you are, Besila! Oh, I still cannot thank you enough for taking on such a noble quest! Most of the people passing through did not have your bravery! And yet you swore to uphold justice and honor!"

I winced. Somehow alcohol and his annoying Common accent did not go together. "Uh, hi," I said groggily. "What exactly did I agree to last night? And would you happen to be..." I checked my tail. "...Pablo?"

"What? No. You do not remember my name?"

"Let's just say the only bells that are ringing are the ones in my ears..."

The balding human said, "No matter! I am not good at names myself. Ulysses Tardis, at your service!"

"Great, great... Refresh my memory- Step by step, what exactly do I have to do to help you?"

And Ulysses Tardis explained. Happily. Horrifyingly happily.

I was to go into the town, find the tower, climb the tower, avoid villain "Starblaze", find the strongbox, grab the strongbox, climb down the tower, find the Tardis, give Tardis the strongbox, and collect my reward from that farmer... Ten shiny apples.

I thought, what the heck. I had promised him I'd help, even if at the time I had enough liquor in me to kill a small Thunderhead. Besides, no way the day could get worse... right?

One suggestion: Never... EVER... think that.

Anyways, I groaned as the human left me to wallow in my righteousness. And I sighed, and I pulled out my "Mace of the Monkey." I prefer to call it my "Hurt-You-Bad Stick," and the villagers seemed to be aware of this. As I walked through, the humans retreated into their doorways until I had passed.

After a few seconds, I spotted the tower- a spire that twisted far into the sky. I craned my neck to watch the tiny Alliance banner whipping in the wind. It earned a whistle of awe from me.

My whistle quickly turned into a yelp of shock, because I had been hit over the head with a spear. I turned my attention to a skinny guard, who gripped his little spear and shook. I blinked a few times. "You want to try that again?" I said. The young guard stepped into the bushes and watched me open the door.

Inside the tower, I was horrified to see that the stairs were littered with corpses. I took a deep breath. I made a promise. I stepped over the bodies, and made my way up the spiral staircase. I went up... and up... can't... breathe... and up... and up...

To make a long paragraph short, I finally got to the top, where I saw a doorway that led into a circular room. "Why do these people like circles so much?" I muttered, and went inside. I found the lock-box, and opened my backpack to try and fit it in. With much shoving and cursing, I managed to make it fit, and I went back to the stairs.

When I heard thunderous footsteps, I had a feeling I should get out of there. After all, a Horde member standing atop a staircase littered with the cadavers of Alliance members... They weren't likely to give me the benefit of the doubt.

So, I spotted a small opening in the floor, went Feral, pried off the grate with my bear paws, changed back, and jumped. With a soft, "OOF!" I landed in the middle of the circular room beneath it. There was a terrified looking elf staring at me.

"Sorry to bother you!" I said loudly. "How do you get out of here?"

The elf stared at me for a few seconds. "Take me with you!" he blurted, taking a step towards me.

I blinked a few times. "Sorry, kid. I fly solo."

He said vehemently, "Hey, you dropped into my cell, and if you want to get out, you're getting out with me!"

"Look, I don't have time to argue! Where's the door?!"

"Look, you're taking me with you! Eh- Think of it as a quest!"

I started at him. He looked so urgent I could practically see a big exclamation mark bouncing around his head. "FINE!" I bellowed. "I'll take you with me!"

"And you have to make sure I don't die."

"You want me to escort you?!"

"Do you want to know where the door is or not!"

"Alright! I promise I'll make sure you don't die!"

"Cross your heart?"

I took a deep breath. "Cross my heart and hope to die stick a needle in my eye get stomped to death by Kodo feet and buried deep in mossy peat- Now let's GO!"

The annoying elf pointed to an odd-looking wall section. I aimed a ball of Wrath at the wall, and knocked it down. I was running down a secondary staircase like my life depended on it, which- you know- it did.

"Wait up!" the elf wailed, trying to climb down the steep steps with his long robe.

I made a noise that was a cross between a groan, a scream, and a moo. Grabbing the elf under the arms, I heaved him over my shoulder.

"HEY!" gasped the elf. "Put me down!"

"You asked me to save you, I'm saving you!" I yelled.

I accidentally burst through the thin door at the end of the stairway. It was the bottom of the tower. It was filled with Night Elf soldiers.

"Oh, man!" I muttered.

"How did you manage to get us caught so quick?!" the elf hissed.

Before I could retort, one of the people stepped forward. "Ah, Saph!" said the richly dressed Night Elf, in a sickly sweet kind of way. "It seems your Horde allies have finally decided to rescue you!"

The elf slung over my shoulder muttered something incoherently.

"What was that?" asked the elf- the one who was getting more evil the longer I stared at him. "If it was, 'Blast, my plan is foiled and I have just given myself reason to be executed,' then you'd be correct."

I blinked in total astonishment, not really absorbing the situation. I was surrounded by hostile Alliance. I had already been flagged by that skinny guard. I was going to die very soon. The day had found a way to get worse. Huh.

The evil elf laughed. "Guards, take them both upstairs when you feel like it. I suppose it's best for Saph to have some company before he... expires..." He left casually.

After a few seconds, I reached a decision. I leaped up, and when both my hooves hit the floor, the resulting War Stomp stunned most of the guards.

I sprinted out of there with an elf on my back and a dozen warriors on my heels. I threw down some Very Sticky Glue an old troll once gave me, and prayed it wasn't just Mildly Cohesive Paste. Somehow, I managed to get ahead of them- just enough to loose them! And I lost them! Woo!

I put down the elf.

"Who are you?" the elf asked blankly.

"Besila," I grunted, peering around a corner.

"I'm Saph."

"Nice to meet you, but I'm not sure if this is the time for quaint introductions."

"Right..."

I saw that the coast was clear. "C'mon!" Dragging the elf-boy "Saph" behind me, I got to the huge wall, and ran to the other side.

"I'm free..." Saph murmured. "I can't believe I'm free."

"Good instincts, Rexxar, because we're not free," I said, and watched bitterly as Ulysses Tardis ran up.

"Hello Besila! Did you find the-"

"Yeah yeah! Here's your stupid strongbox."

Tardis gasped and hugged the box I gave him. "Thank you so much! I am eternally in your debt! Oh, let me get your reward."

Saph let out a yell and hid behind me. I turned around. Getting closer were the soldiers who had managed to find me. Just as I expected, we were very far from being free.

I turned tail and tried to run, but I smacked into Tardis and his shiny red apples. I noticed Saph was just standing there, and it looked like he was trying and failing to hearthstone out of there.

"You're never gonna get out of here like that!" I snapped. I grabbed his arm and tried to guide his motions, "Here, you gotta-"

"No- What are you doing?! Stop-"

"Stop squirming or-"

"LET GO NOW!"

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO-"

There was a flash of light.

"Do...?"