Hi guys! So, apparently you aren't allowed to have song lyrics in your fic if they aren't an actual part of the story... so I had to take the lyrics out of this, sorry! I'm not sure when the next time I'll be able to update any of my stories will be. Some personal issues have come up, and they take priority over fanfiction. BUT, it is 2nd on my priorities list! So have no fear, I will update by August! :)
So this was written to the song Better Than I Know Myself by Adam Lambert, enjoy!
Students surrounded us as the violent words were exchanged between us. They're staring, whispering about themselves, trying to guess what it was that we were fighting about this time. I would bet my newly acquired Malfoy fortune that not a single one of them could guess correctly.
"God fucking damn it, Potter!" I yell once Harry is finished with his little rant. It pains me to call him Potter, but calling him Harry would cause red flags to raise in the minds of the curious students. This is why I wish he had chosen a more private place for this, but being the rash Gryffindor he is, he had to explode when he felt like it, no matter the time and place.
"Don't you fucking get it?" I continue. "I prefer for those close to me to be alive rather than dead; unlike you."
Fuck. I didn't just say that. Please tell me I didn't. Oh Merlin. Looking into Harry's eyes, I could tell that the tears were threatening to fall. Oh Merlin, what have I done?
The crowd had gone silent, and somewhere in the back of my mind I registered that fact that Uncle Severus had gotten here, yet had one nothing to stop the fight.
Harry's eyes hardened in a way I had never seen before, and his next words were spat out, as if he was having trouble reigning in his anger. "Fuck you, Malfoy. Fuck. You."
He turned around, and the crowd parted, allowing him to walk through unobstructed. I could see Weasel and Granger run over to him, but a quick snarl from the raven haired boy caused them to back off in fear. I stood still in the middle of the boisterous crowd, knowing that my words had cut deep within the only man I had ever loved.
Later that night, past curfew I snuck off to the place we had first formed our truce. It was a tall window had a bench, making it easy to sit and stare at the moon on calm nights. I sat down and looked at the moon. It's a full moon, just like that night. God, I can't believe I said that today. I'm such a fuck up. I heard footsteps approaching and looked up, only to see the eyes that have haunted my dreams for the past months.
"Hey," I said quietly. Lame, Draco, lame. You practically broke the heart of the boy you love, and all you can say is "hey"? "I'm- That was really stupid of me today. I shouldn't have said that." He moved to sit next to me, bringing his knees up to his chest, giving him a more vulnerable look.
"But you meant it," He pointed out, not meeting my eyes. "You wouldn't have said it if you didn't mean it." He looks so broken, so hollow.
"I just- you have to understand this, Harry. I'm going to take the mark," Looking as if he was going to protest again, I stopped him by holding a hand up. "Hear me out. You're Harry Potter, and you're destined to save us all, whether you like it or not. During this entire war, Harry, you are going to be out there on the front lines, fighting against Voldemort. I'm not going to sit on the sidelines and just hope that you come back to me safe and sound. I'm not a bloody housewife," He chuckled at that, and I found myself smiling, happy that I've broken some of the tension. "Anyways, that would be your job. Wouldn't it, you submissive little minx?" I winked at him in good humor, but it was true, Harry always bottoms, and begs for it like a bitch in heat. It's such a turn-on.
"Hey! I happen to like getting my ass buggered by you, thank you very much. You should try it sometime, you might like it." My eyes widened as I took in his meaning. There was no way I was getting buggered. No way! But, before I could possibly think of Harry's sweet ass, we had serious business to finish.
"Harry, I'm getting the mark. And I will be a spy for you. Not the Light, but for you."
Harry, my strong Harry, started sobbing after I said that. Never having dealt with a crying teenager, I tentatively hugged him. That was all the invitation he needed, because in the next instant, Harry had wrapped his arms wound my neck and curled up on my lap, burying his face in my shirt. A shirt that cost more than Harry would think a shirt could possibly cost. And, it's one of my favorites; irreplaceable, cleaning charms damage the nice material. But it doesn't matter because this is Harry, and he's more important than my entire wardrobe, more important than my fame, fortune, and reputation. There was nothing I wouldn't do for him, including allowing his to stain my favorite shirt with his snot and tears. I rubbed his back and muttered calm, soothing, nonsensical words in his ear, and after a while, he was able to speak.
"Harry, you know I have to do this-" I started.
"I can't lose you! I can't! Please, Draco! Don't leave me! I can't! I can't! Please!"
"Shh, shh. It's alright, baby. It's going to be okay. Because you know what?" I asked as I tilted his head up so that our eyes locked. "I will never leave you. You'll always be with me. Here," I grabbed his hand and placed it over my beating heart. "We'll come out of this together, I promise."
"How- how can you be sure?" He looks so innocent, so lost and confused, and young as he let out all his insecurities. Let it all out, babe. There's nothing you need to hide from me.
"Because, I am completely in love with you and love will always win. Anyways, who would tell me when I'm being a complete prat?"
"Or very sappy," He giggled.
"Yes, well, don't expect it too often. We can't let it get out that the great Draco Malfoy has gone soft, can we?"
Sitting in my room, my thoughts turned to Harry as they often do. When we were younger, there was always this attraction between us. Yes, that attraction led us to fighting (both wizard and muggle), but there was always something else as well. During those early years, I was alone, and I convinced myself that I was fine with it. Crabbe and Goyle were simply bodyguards (Father has a lot of enemies), and the other Slytherins hang on me because of my name and money. It's pretty awesome, but it's also weird; to be in a room full of people who worship you, yet you feel alone. I had no friend support, and my life at home was not much better. Mother is rarely at home, spending most of her time vacationing across the world with her various lovers. Father is always away on business and when he is home, it means lessons on becoming the Dark Lord's favorite. There was a time when I wanted to be just like him, but when Potter rejected my hand of friendship back in first year, let's just say it opened my eyes to reality.
I spent years thinking that I hated Harry, that we were sworn enemies, but then my teenage hormones kicked in around 4th year and I started to notice what a great ass Harry has. Fourth year and fifth year were the worst years I had ever had. I spent every day crushing over Harry Potter, and he just went on hating me. Of course, at the time I didn't know that Harry was feeling the exact same way by the time fifth year started. We got together at the beginning of sixth year, and ever since then, I found my purpose for living, because without Harry, I was lost.
"Hey there," Came an all too familiar voice.
I looked up ready to say something, anything, but I just couldn't find the words. I went back to staring out our window.
"Tomorrow's graduation." Congratulations on stating the obvious. "Dray, talk to me. Please! I'm- I'm scared." On any other occasion I would hold my Harry close and comfort him, but today my inner turmoil had reached its peak and was ready to lash out.
"You're scared? What the fuck do you have to be scared about? You're Harry bloody Potter, everyone knows that you're making it out alive! You're going to defeat the Dark Lord, get married to some hot girl, have lots of kids and grow old watching the new world; the one without a dark lord!" I was almost screaming now, and I could see Harry, slowly leaning away from me, but I kept going. "What about me, Harry? Huh? What about me? I want to grow old, with you, and have a happy ever after! But I'm not going to be able to because I am going to die! I'm going to die, at the hands of the Dark Lord, or from the Light, I will die!" I was slightly out of breath from my rant, so I leaned back and closed my eyes, relishing in the newfound calmness that surrounded my thoughts. "I don't want to die, Harry. I'm scared. I'm so scared."
After a moment's pause, I heard him sigh. "Oh Draco. Don't be scared, please. You're going to make it out in one piece, I promise. And I won't ever settle down with some girl, I won't." I felt Harry's arms wrap around me, and I leaned into the embrace, happy to get comfort from the man I love. "I can only be happy with you, Dray, only you. I promise, we're going to make it. I promise."
"Don't you die either, Potter. Don't you fucking dare." I turned, and gave my lover the best glare I could muster.
Suddenly, I found Harry's lips pressed against mine in a chaste kiss. "I love you too much to die and leave you here all by your lonesome."
I attacked his lips in a ferocious manner, smiling as I thought back on his words. We didn't sleep that night; instead, we made love until half an hour before the graduation ceremony began. After the ceremony, Harry would be training, and commanding the Light, while I receive the Dark Mark and begin my life as a spy. Before we parted ways, I pulled Harry tight against my chest, and instead of kissing him as I normally do, I simply held him close. He nuzzled my neck and I smiled. Somehow, we'll make it through, because love always wins in the end.
"I love you," he whispered in my ear.
He always knows what I need to hear. I'm not sure how, but somehow, he always comes up with the right words at the right moments. He knows me better than I know myself.
"I love you, too."
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I really want to know what you guys thought. If I get good reviews, then I might write some more one shots like this one! Thanks!