A small thing written after listening to the Mediæval Bæbes a bit too many times. Yes, I am a Pagan, but I was Catholic for most of my life.

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I am Eve.

I brought humankind from it's blissfully ignorant existence in Eden. I am to blame for the follies and evils that exist in human souls. I caused greed, shame, revenge and murder.

I also created choice.

I gave mankind the wisdom to see good and evil. I gave humankind a conscience. Knowledge. By taking that fruit from the forbidden tree, I undermined his supreme authority. It was the fruit of youth, the shattering of what would be an eternal childhood. I was doomed to a life of servitude, pain and toil for a husband, but the fruit gave me wisdom.

I saw that what I did was right. Not for anything would I go back to the ignorant state we would have been doomed to. There is pain in the world, but there is great good as well. We were locked in an empty room and told not to move anything. There was nothing to move, so we could not choose. We could not disobey. We could not think for ourselves. Though we had been given—wrongful—dominion over the beasts and birds, we were no better, no more exalted than they were.

We knew nothing of choice.

We were slaves in our tiny world, not knowing of any other option. We would have been happy, yes, but such happiness is cruelty. If you lock a child in a room with a companion and everything that child could want, and never let that child know greed or evil, never let that child be aware that such a thing existed, the child would be happy. It would have no other choice than to be happy. It would know no other way.

If happy is the opposite of sad, and there is no sad to have an opposite to, would we really be happy? Or would we have been reduced to mindless drones, just doing things and being happy, in a constant state of delirium?

With knowledge and choice comes wisdom. And wisdom brings joy. Not simple mindless happiness like that a dog would have upon seeing his master return, but joy that can bring tears to your eyes and brightness to your soul. Joy at discovering something of great importance, joy at not simply bearing a child painlessly and without gratefulness but after great effort. Joy at knowing that you've accomplished something great, overcome something within you, or simply created something beautiful.

Happiness is not joy. Ignorance is a sickly sweet fruit. It looks wonderful, but festers eventually. We would not have remained happy. I brought knowledge, and with that knowledge humankind has accomplished a great many things.

I do not regret for a moment my actions. I do not regret for a second that I befriended the serpent. I do not regret for an instant that he showed me something I didn't think possible. The serpent opened my eyes, and one day, I'll pay the debt back.

But for now, I toil. I sweat and work and try to bring myself back up to the position of equality that I lost. It was my sacrifice, my burden, but I bear it gladly because of the knowledge that I brought beauty to the world, and most of all, the ability to appreciate it.

I am Eve.

And I am not repentant.