"I will prove that my ideals are absolute, even if it means hurting my precious Pokemon friends!"

I growled angrily and flopped down onto my back on the bed. The sheets beneath me smelled like lavender, but even that couldn't relax me today. The pillow above my head soon made its way into my arms as I reached up for it and held it close against me, trying to absorb the meagre comfort something inanimate could offer.

Ever since I had defeated N in his pristine, perfect castle, everything suddenly felt like it had been dropped right onto my shoulders. Ghetsis… his own father had rejected him, practically disowned him, simply for losing to me. Nothing seemed to have been accomplished at all. Unova was saved, but who would fight to save N…? I had won the battle against the king of Team Plasma, but why did it feel like he was the one who had won something more precious?

"You told me before in Chargestone Cave that you had a dream. If anyone could reach for the stars and touch one, it's you. Go, fight for your dreams! I… I don't expect us to meet again… Take care of yourself Touko. Farewell."

Tears stung my eyes and I didn't even bother to wipe them away. I just gripped the pillow harder and let the droplets silently roll down my face. Licking my lips, all I could taste was salt. Bitter, just like the way I felt after he had gone out of my life forever.

Countless times when we met during our travels I tried to see into his soul and figure out what made him behave that way, but he would turn away or hide within himself until I was speaking to nothing more than a mannequin. His responses would become automated, devoid of any kind of emotion. He wouldn't even let me try to help, or try to understand. It was like trying to touch a ghost that was trapped, prevented from leaving the world and finding everlasting peace. It just couldn't be done.

I sat up cross-legged and placed my tear-stained pillow down in front of me. One by one I pulled my Poke balls off of my belt and placed them in a row on top of the few dry spots on the pillow. I loved all of my Pokemon with a passion that no one else could replicate, and they had always been there for me when no one else was around. They were my support system, one of the strongest kinds, and right now I needed them a hell of a lot.

One certain Poke ball caught my eye, and I fondly reached out and picked it up. It fit snugly in the palm of my hand, like it had been made specifically for me alone, and it was covered with scratches and a couple of dents. This ball was obviously the oldest one out of my six, and it was one of the most precious to me. I could feel my tears drying up already.

"Iven, I could use your company right now…" I sniffled. I weakly threw the Poke ball into the air and in a brilliant burst of light my Pokemon partner since the beginning was sitting on the bed in front of me, concern shadowing his calm features. He immediately slithered over to me and rested his head on my lap.

"I don't know, Iven… I feel so alone right now. I didn't want to bug you, but mom went out shopping in Accumula Town for the day and she won't be back any time soon. Cheren is never around anymore, and Bianca is just as busy. I'm sorry…"

Iven cried out softly and nuzzled the tip of his nose into my hand. I couldn't help but smile; even though he wasn't a small Snivy anymore, Iven was still the same old cutie pie I had started off with.

I sighed heavily, my breathing still a little uneven and jerky from my long cry. Iven didn't seem to mind. He only glanced up at me once in a while to make sure I wasn't beginning to bawl all over again. I absently began to stroke his head as I tried to explain my mixed up feelings. It was hard for me to make sense of all the swirling thoughts and seething emotions, but he ever so patiently listened.

"Do you remember when we first met N?" I asked, looking down at him to see what kind of response I got. My gaze was met with an uninterested one, accompanied by a curt nod and a bit of a huff. I giggled a little bit.

"So you don't like him much, huh? I don't blame you. He was trying to separate people and Pokemon after all, and that's pretty terrible."

My mood darkened a little bit, and I added quietly, "But… it wasn't entirely his fault either…"

Iven lifted his head up to look me directly in the face and his eyes questioned me. He seemed confused, which was understandable considering I had returned him to his Poke ball before he could hear Ghetsis' comments towards his son. He must have thought I was on drugs or something, his stare was that incredulous. Smiling sadly, I rubbed the top of his head affectionately.

"Yes, believe it or not, it wasn't all N's fault," I explained, laying back down on the bed and staring up at the blank ceiling. "His father, Ghetsis, is the real culprit. He surrounded N with Pokemon who had only been hurt by people on purpose. He wanted him to pursue his ideals and awaken the legendary Pokemon Zekrom. Then he would force the trainers of the world to release their Pokemon. That way no one would be able to stand up to Team Plasma – or should I say, to Ghetsis."

Iven's brows furrowed as he took all the information in. No doubt it was news to him. I hadn't meant to leave him in the dark, but things kinda progressed really fast after battling N. I hadn't even gotten a chance to say a proper goodbye to that stupid guy…

I could feel tears forming in my eyes again and I wiped them away this time. I was sick of crying. I was so very tired of missing N, thinking about him, everything! Why couldn't he just come back!? Why the hell did I let him leave!?

"After our battle I got to see a fleeting glimpse of the real N; the childlike, insecure boy who had been blatantly ignored and constantly walked on. It wasn't pretty, and I have to admit I had no idea what he went though and I still don't. But I do know one thing – letting him go was one of the worst mistakes I've ever made!"

I felt something suddenly rest its weight on my stomach, and I lifted up my head to see what it was. Iven was laying down beside me, using my tummy as a pillow. He was completely relaxed, and he seemed to be fighting off sleep with all of his being. One eye was half-lidded and the other one was closed. He was staring at me as intently as a sleepy Serperior could.

"All I want… is another chance. I need to make sure he's okay. I can't go on not knowing. My heart, my soul won't rest until I know for sure, you know why? I think I finally do," I murmured, abruptly feeling sleep taking a hold of me even as I spoke. Iven yawned cutely and twitched his leafy tail a couple of times before finally letting his eyelid close. I quickly followed suit, snuggling my regal companion closer to me and allowing my own eyelids to droop. My final sentence was whispered on a sigh, and little did I know that someone else had heard every single word.

"I love him."

I was shaking… no, something was shaking me? I slowly forced my sleep-filled eyes to open and focus on the person hovering over me. Oh, someone was shaking me!

I blinked a few times and groggily slurred out, "Whossere?"

"I… I'm sorry?" a confused male voice asked.

I heard a loud hissing noise and I remembered that I had fallen asleep with Iven in my arms last night. He didn't sound very happy though. I was still hugging him tight and I could feel all the muscles in his body tense right up. Who was in my bedroom at this hour anyway?

"Who… what'dyawant…?" I tried again, rubbing my eyes tiredly. Waking up in the morning was never easy for me, and after having such a great sleep last night it was even harder than usual. Iven hissed again, sounding even more potent this time, and whoever was leaning over me jumped back. It bothered me that his voice sounded so familiar, and yet I still didn't know who it was.

"Please, I have to talk to Touko. Can't you at least let me talk to her?"

Now that someone wasn't even talking to me anymore. He was talking to… Iven? There was only one person I knew who could understand Pokemon and talk to them… but no, it couldn't be. Could it?

Iven grumbled in protest and I heard a loud sigh, which had come from none other than the mysterious someone that I should have recognized right away. I furiously rubbed at my eyes, wishing that they could wake up faster but having no luck. My heart began to do flops inside my rib cage as I heard him take tentative steps towards my bedside.

"I didn't mean to listen in, I swear. I merely came to deliver a proper goodbye… but after hearing that… I… I just couldn't tear myself away." I heard him clear his throat and take a deep breath, and suddenly I felt his weight settle down on the opposite side of the bed. I glanced over at my Pokemon companion. He had reluctantly backed down, eyeing the intruder cautiously. My heart threatened to explode right out of my chest as I sat up and stared, dumbfounded, at his back. "Please, I'm begging you… Give me a chance."

"Only if you're willing to give me a chance… N."