Well I'll be darned, another story already! This one is thanks to a suggestion from ToastyToaster22 that I was able to combine with an absurd idea that's been stubbornly sitting in a back room of my mind for ages. Thanks again, TT!
And as always, hope you all enjoy! - SGA
The three teens cut a rough sight as they emerged from the surrounding woods and plodded onto the grounds of the Mystery Shack.
"Hey, Wen-Wen?" Mabel piped up curiously. She couldn't hold in the question that had been bouncing around her brain for the last few minutes any longer.
"Yeah?" Wendy replied as she examined the long tear in her flannel sleeve, courtesy of their fresh encounter with one of the forest's unfriendlier denizens.
"After today, who would you say is worse? Unicorns, or centi-corns?"
"Oh, definitely centi-corns all the way. " The sixteen-year-old replied without the slightest hesitation.
"Really? I'd say unicorns." The other girl differed. "They act like total jerks on purpose. I think whoever we ran into was just a grump that wanted to be left alone."
"Nah. Centicorns are definitely worse." Wendy asserted. "Way, waaay higher chance of getting skewered."
"I'm with Wendy. That was like being chased around by a giant porcupine with hooves." Dipper agreed with a shudder. Mabel proceeded to forget all about the discussion as they physically reached the tumbledown tourist trap.
"Back at the Shack!" She sang after skipping onto the porch. "Who wants drinks?"
As usual, she was still chocked-full of her usual excessive energy. Mabel bounced right inside without waiting for any replies from either her friend or her twin. "Waddles! Waaaaddles! We're hoooo-oooooome!"
Dipper and Wendy wearily slumped on the steps outside and began to recover from the day's hectic brush with weirdness. As the lumberjill ran her fingers through her tangled red hair, she noticed the particularly large horn-made rip at the bottom of one of her friend's pockets and the bit of fake leather sticking out from it.
"Watch out dude. Your-" There was a small rip as the last few strands of shredded fabric gave away and the thirteen-year-old's wallet tumbled out. Dipper groaned.
"Oh, c'mon."
Wendy laughed. "Well, better that than a hole in your thigh."
"Yeah, that's true. Man, I can't remember the last time we've had so many close calls in just one-" The thirteen-year-old picked up his wallet and right on unlucky cue all of its contents spilled at once. "Oh come on! Seriously?"
"Chill." She bent over to help gather up the little mess, which included his high school ID. Wendy grinned at the picture, which like most official ID photos was far from flattering. "Hey, check out this dude right here-"
A particular piece of information caught her eye, and confusion instantly struck her with the force of a speeding bus.
"Wendy?" Dipper watched her face twist up with bewilderment.
"...Mason?" She read out loud. The girl passed her friend a puzzled look. "Wait, who's Mason?"
Dipper froze. Wendy meanwhile resumed her gawking and continued to stare uncomprehendingly at her friend's picture and the unfamiliar name next to it until everything finally clicked.
"Oh…oh, whoa. That's your...that's your name." She exclaimed the now-obvious. "Like….your real name."
"Uh…" Her friend could only manage a small grunt, and nothing more. Meanwhile the older teen just sat there as she absorbed this new fact.
"What's all this biz?" Mabel reappeared with sodas in her arms and her pig by her side. One glance at the others' expression was all she needed to realize that something notable had clearly happened during her brief absence.
"I just…." Wendy held up the little piece of plastic in her hand. The smaller girl cocked her head.
"Okay, I know it's not the best photo he's taken, but it's not that bad."
"It's not the photo, it's the….." She shook her head. "It's just…."
"Just what?" The little brunette pried as she passed around drinks.
"Mason."
"Oh!" Mabel finally got it. "You mean you didn't know that-"
"Uh-huh. So it's like….kind of a weird surprise...even though it probably shouldn't be. I mean, I knew that 'Dipper' was just a nickname because of the birthmark and everything, but….I guess I…I forgot that he had an other, official name out there." Wendy sounded a little embarrassed to admit this. "Like, just completely forgot."
"You know what? I almost forget all the time!" Mabel cheerily confessed. She was more than happy to go and launch right into the whole backstory without any prompting whatsoever. "Dad was the one who started the whole thing. He started calling him Big Dipper really early on, but he says that got shortened to Dipper pretty quickly, and then it wasn't long at all until Mom started saying it too. And so by the time Dip-Dop and I were old enough to know that names were a thing and that we had them, my bro-bro had already become Dipper to pretty much everyone by then, including us!"
"That's one way to do it." There was a small pop as Wendy opened her drink. She took a sip and then asked, "Hey, you okay?"
"Yeah, I'm okay!" The younger girl chirped. "Thanks!"
"I meant him." She pointed to Dipper, who was chewing on his lip as he sat in wordless silence. Something had gotten him all wound up.
"Dipper?" Mabel waved a hand over his face.
"Dude? Hey, what's with you?"
"I...uh….okay, so, about the whole name thing….." He suddenly opened up with a river of nervous babble. "Okay, so it's like, yeah, it's kind of a weird thing. So uh, Mason's my name and all, but….like, it is, but it also isn't. I mean, yeah it's what I write on tests and school papers, official forms and things like that, but…"
As the boy continued jabbering, he scratched at the anxious itch that prickled on his shoulder. Wendy cocked her head and looked from twin to twin.
"Wait, what's happening right now?" She asked. Mabel, looking equally bewildered, just shrugged back at her.
"Hold on, this is going somewhere. Just hold on a sec." Dipper pled. "So I...well, I guess Mabel kind of already covered the gist of it, and...see, I just got so used to the nickname so early and used my real name so little….I seriously don't really think of myself like that. As Mason, I mean. I don't think of myself as a Mason that much, if that makes any sense. I kinda...kinda see myself as a Dipper more than anything else. By a lot. Yeah, that's not exactly a normal name or anything, but that's just how things have turned out. And so…."
"What are you talking about?" His friend asked, but he didn't seem to hear her."
"...I guess that's why I never got around to telling you or anything. It's not like I wanted to hide it, it really just didn't seem like that big of a deal when I don't see myself as a-"
"Whoa, whoa, wait." Wendy finally realized what had gotten him wound up so tightly. "Wait….so...are you seriously saying you're feeling bad about me not knowing about the Mason thing until now?"
"Well…." Dipper's pause told her everything she needed. The lumberjill erupted with a massive chuckle-fit.
"Okay...oookay..." Without further ado she stood up and started sauntering away from the Shack.
"Wendy?" Piped up Mabel.
"Wendy? Hey, where are you going?" Dipper asked.
She turned her head and answered back, "Away from here."
"Why?"
"Because it's over."
"What?" He sputtered.
"Yup. It's over."
"What are you talking about?"
"This. This whole friendship? Officially over. Done. Finished." She wiped her hands for effect. "You've really crossed a line here. Look, I could totally handle watching you dance in a costume for some freaky ghost couple, fighting myself in your great-uncle's crazy underground bunker, meeting that same great-uncle after he finished spending thirty years in a dimension because of some gate thing…."
Dipper had worked himself so badly that it took him longer than he would have liked to catch on as the older teen continued with her very long and very sarcastic act. Mabel however didn't need much time before she succumbed to the giggles.
"...Dragging me along on an investigation where I learned that a secret society had been living in my town for years….but this? This thing right now? This is just too much to deal with. I mean, how could you keep this from me? Like, I seriously don't even know how I can ever even look you in the eye again without…." Wendy finally halted the performance. "Okay, see what's going on here? See what I'm doing?"
"I see, I see." He averted his gaze. Wendy smirked and returned to her seat.
"Yeah, I'm totally fine. You feel like you're a Dipper more than anything? Cool, I've felt the exact same for as long as I've known you."
"Sorry. For some reason I just thought that you might be…." There was a long pause. "Okay, I'm actually not sure how I wanted to finish that."
"Good, then don't try to." Wendy snickered, but he still tried nevertheless.
"No, wait, I got this. I...I guess that I thought...you know, friends tell each other things, and something as big as a real name should be something that-"
She grinned, gave the incredibly neurotic boy a comforting pat on the back and spelled things out plain and clear for him. "Look, I know you weren't trying to hide anything from me. This is such a non-problem, dude. So you prefer a nickname over a real name. Okay, fine. You wouldn't be the first. Besides, it's not like I ever tried to actually ask you about the name thing. And I've had over a year to do it!"
"That's fair." He admitted, then curiously pried. "Did you ever think about asking me?"
"Like, maybe once or twice. But it's like I said, you're a Dipper to me just as much as you are to yourself. The real name thing didn't cross either of our minds, so no harm no foul. Trust me, you're so fine on this, you have no idea."
"Hear that? You're in the clear!" Mabel threw up her arms and cheered before wrapping up her twin in a quick comforting squeeze. Dipper smiled weakly, even as his cheeks burned bright scarlet.
"Wow...so...looks like I made a big deal out of literally nothing, huh?"
"Of course you did. It's what you do best." She affectionately joked before pulling the trapper hat on his head down over his face.
"Thanks a lot." He returned the favor by yanking down the brim of her battered pine tree cap.
"Anytime, Mason." She laughed.
"You big silly." Mabel teased her twin. Wendy meanwhile had started playing around with her new tidbit knowledge.
"Mason Pines….Mason Pines...Mason Pines." She repeated to herself, "Okay, no offense or anything but that honestly sort of feels weird to say."
"That makes two of us, actually." Dipper revealed sheepishly.
She chortled and shook her head. "Man, I can't believe you just got so worked up."
"I know, I know." He grew even redder
"Of all the things that I've seen you deal with, and you thought that I-"
"I know I know I know I know! Trust me, I know! Well...now I do, at least."
Wendy grinned. "Did you get embarrassed about your actual name at least a little? Like, at all?"
"No, that would actually make a little bit of sense." Dipper ribbed himself.
"If it helps, I'd still probably rag on you just as hard if you did. I mean, Mason's definitely not a bad name or anything."
"Really?" He immediately perked up.
"Yeah, it's totally fine. And it definitely wouldn't be something to get worked up over. Especially when there's lots of people out there that have way, way weirder name deals going on." She said with a curiously firm assuredness that he couldn't help but notice.
"So….what's the deal with your name?" He decided to ask.
Wendy did herself no favors when she spit up a little soda mid-sip and immediately confirmed her hyper-observative friend's suspicions.
"Wait, you got a name-secret too?" Mabel clapped her rosy cheeks.
"Uh..." Now it was Wendy's turn to speak volumes with mere silence.
"Ooooh, what is it? Is it the whole Blerble thingy? Is that it? Oh don't worry, you already told us allllll about that! Okay yeah, so your great-aunt had kind of a unique name, but I actually think it's kind of sweet that your parents used it for your middle ..." The little brunette read the look on their friend's face, trailed off and then involuntary shouted, "Ohmigosh! You have ANOTHER one?"
"I-"
"TWO name-secrets?"
The older teenager buried her face in her hand. "Crap."
Dipper had already sprouted an enormous smile that was still spreading fast. "Okay, now you have to tell us."
"Yeah! Let's go, Wen-Wen! Spill it! Spill it! Spill it! Spill it!"
It wasn't long until both the twins were taking up the chant with gusto. Wendy's pale skin meanwhile lit up with a fiery blush. It looked like she had just stuck herself tight between a rock and a hard place. She could either fess up, or tell a painfully obvious lie and say she had nothing to hide and then naively hope that two of the most stubborn people in the world wouldn't press her any further. In other words, she was incredibly short on good options here.
"Awesome. This is totally what I wanted to do today." She joked.
Dipper softened his tone and asked gently, "Please?"
"Yeah! Please, Wen-Wen? Pleeeeeease?" Mabel chimed, and flashed a pair of puppy-dog eyes for good measure.
"Hey, I didn't say I wasn't gonna do it." She relented. "Okay, you promise not to tell anyone else?"
The twins nodded.
"Seriously, I mean it. Not a lot of people know. Most of my friends at school don't even know. Just Tambry." The redhead confessed.
Immediately the Pines knew they were dealing with something considerable. Dipper pinched his index finger and thump and ran them his mouth. But instead of merely pretending to flick the imaginary zipper away as usual, this time he threw it as hard and as far as he could. His sister meanwhile tugged the neck of her sweater up over her nose before she solemnly crossed her heart. Wendy cackled at the spectacle.
"You guys are the biggest dorks."
"Dorks who aren't going to let anything leave this porch!" Mabel popped her head and declared. Wendy definitely couldn't deny that twins of all people knew a thing or two about keeping particular secrets under wraps.
"We promise we won't tell anyone-" Dipper tried to vow before his sister interrupted with an offer.
"If you tell us, I'll do a name-secret too and tell you how Waddles became Waddles!"
"...What?" He cocked his head at her. "He's called Waddles because he waddles around. That's not a secret."
"Not anymore, it isn't!" Mabel chirped before she turned back to their friend. "Okay, we've both officially done one! Now it's your turn!"
"Yeah, looks like it." Wendy took a deep breath."Okay….soooo…..Wendy is…." She started to chuckle again. "Oh man, I can't believe I'm actually doing this…."
"We won't tell anyone." Dipper reminded her with a reassuring smile. "We promise."
"I know, dude." She grinned weakly back at him. "This is just something that I-"
"What is it? Is Wendy short for something? Like...liiiike...maaaaaybeee...oh! Oh, oh, oh! Like Gwendolyn?" Mabel guessed. She tugged her own chocolate-brown locks and squealed. "Oooohh, what a gorgeous name! That would be amazing!"
"If that was true, then why would I be Wendy instead of Gwen?" Wendy chuckled as she very sensibly pointed this out.
"...I'm not really sure." The young girl quickly admitted.
"Just give me a sec, I'm getting to it. Alright…..soooooo... Wendy is…..my name...okay, my parents got my first name from where they went on their first date together." She finally revealed, and the sheer absurdity of it all made her immediately crack up.
"Was it like a cafe, or a bar, or what?" Dipper inquisitively pried.
"Restaurant. And you guys are probably already pretty familiar with it." She hinted, and smiled amusedly while she watched the sibling sleuths try to figure it out.
"Really? Is it some place in town, or is it-" He eyes bulged when the obvious answer hit him. "No. Don't tell me-"
"Yup." She snorted. "It's exactly what you think, dude. In case you ever actually wondered at all...yeah, that's not a coincidence."
"You're joking." He refused to believe it. "You're just messing with us right now, right?"
"Nope."
"I..." Dipper found himself at a temporary loss for words.
"Wait, wait, wait! But...but just look at you! Why would they do that…when…...when you..." As she struggled to wrap her brain around this bombshell, the absolutely incredulous Mabel pointed to Wendy's freckled cheeks and bright crimson hair.
"That's easy." Chuckled the red-faced lumberjill. "They did a really bad job of thinking it all through…."