Chapter One: Dark, Weird, Minimalist

Seven year old Harry Potter looked quietly out the window as he rode in the car beside his Aunt Petunia, who was driving. There was a stifling silence.

"I expect you to do well here," said Aunt Petunia. "Learn how to make some good desserts for the family. Duddy loves desserts. Of course, I'll be there to help you." She nodded to herself as if certain, but she sounded harassed, entirely uncertain.

She hadn't been expecting to share her favorite hobby with her least favorite nephew.

"If I make a good dessert for a dinner party, will someone else get the credit?"

Here Aunt Petunia paused.

"… No," she forced out. "You'll have to be included."

Harry nodded and went back to looking quietly out the window. Long rolls of country greenery and a twisting river passed by outside.

"What a strange thing to find, anyway," said Aunt Petunia almost to herself. "An entire summer camp of sorts for wealthy children dedicated to baking."

"How does it work?" Harry asked.

"You never bothered to find out?" Aunt Petunia snapped, irritated.

"You told me to come, so I came," said Harry simply.

"You will attend this camp every summer from ages seven through ten. A single summer break is planned to prepare you for secondary school. There is a main building where the students and their families board, but then little white tents are set up all around the building. Students get together in little groups of three inside the tents, with the groups changing themselves up every new summer. In the younger years, there will of course be an adult baker to help you."

"And it'll be all rich kids?"

"You're a rich kid."

"I don't look it."

Aunt Petunia gave him a sideways glare and harrumphed, turning to stare out at the road again.

"So… is it a competition?" Harry asked tentatively.

"Not exactly. No one gets eliminated. You just bake beside each other and are judged at the end. You're supposed to learn from each other's mistakes," Aunt Petunia added with nasally acidity.

"You like this sort of thing," said Harry. "Baking."

It was just an observation. Aunt Petunia blinked, startled.

"And you wish I weren't coming along as your family," she added at last with equal bluntness.

Harry went back to looking out the car window at the rolling countryside again.

There were indeed large white tents set up around a massive, rambling wood and stone building, way out here in the dark green countryside. The sign said the camp was called Chetnammer's.

Aunt Petunia and Harry found a parking space along the long driveway filled with family cars. Amid the crowds, they got their packs of things, entered the echoing entrance hall, and made their way up the stairs to find their single room with two twin beds.

Suddenly, a loudspeaker in the corner crackled to life - and could be heard echoing out from each and every single individual room. "Students only, please make your way back down to the entrance hall to meet your two other team members."

Aunt Petunia gave Harry a sharp, sideways, alarmed look as he was let out of her sight - then at last, reluctantly, she nodded. Harry scampered off, relieved he wouldn't have to spend every waking moment with his aunt.

He found his way back down to the entrance hall - it was not an incredibly complicated building - where laminated signs with printed names had been set next to each group. Harry found his, and there were two other names beside his: Billie and Miles.

Billie turned out to be a girl.

"Hi!" She smiled brightly and jumped to her feet, sticking out her hand. "I'm Billie."

"Harry," said Harry, smiling uncertainly as he shook the hand. He wasn't sure if his aunt was going to ruin this potential friendship for him or not. Dudley would have - but Dudley was back at home with Uncle Vernon.

A brown-haired boy with glasses also stood and shook Harry's hand, and then Billie's, with a friendly smile. "Miles," he said.

They all sat down cross-legged together.

"We're supposed to talk a little bit about ourselves," said Billie bossily, all business. "All my clothes are black and vintage." And indeed, she was dressed like it. "I believe in feminism and strong women; I get it from my Mum. I love bull-faced dogs and building things. And I adore pink accessories," she finished primly.

Harry blinked in surprise at the last one.

"Well, as for me," said Miles, smiling and pushing his glasses further up his nose, "I'm a big computer geek already in my life. I'm a Japan fanatic and an insect lover, and I love transistor radio."

Then they both turned expectantly to Harry, who suddenly felt intimidated and self conscious.

"I… am an orphan, raised by my aunt and uncle. My aunt is here with me," he admitted, shame-faced. "They don't really allow me… hobbies, or anything. I'm not here for fun; I'm here because there's a lot of pressure put on me."

Billie leaned forward eagerly, wide-eyed. "You're one of those family expects too much from you kinds of people," she interpreted in realization. "Well… we'll just have to help you find some hobbies!"

"You can join ours," said Miles kindly, nodding.

"We certainly have the money for it!" said Billie. "I buy things all the time for my friends. Sometimes it's how I make friends."

"I… don't know if my aunt would allow that…" Harry admitted.

Suddenly, Billie's eyes gleamed. "… Tell me a little bit more about this… aunt."

And then Billie's and Miles's wealthy families, in a perfect act, were talking very seriously to a frantically worried Aunt Petunia.

"The boy has no sense of fashion or personality at all. He won't fare very well here as it is. Bad social look for your family. But we are willing to help you buy him some things so looks are kept up," said Billie's mother very seriously. "My children are willing to let your nephew share some of their hobbies."

Aunt Petunia did look very nervous - but still torn. "What… kinds of hobbies…?" she asked tentatively, giving Harry a sharp look.

And they told her what Harry had chosen from Billie's and Miles's given hobbies.

"… Very well," she said at last, stiff and dignified because she was embarrassed. "That… sounds fine. Thank you."

"Do you… want to come?" Billie's mother asked just as they were all making to leave along with Harry.

Aunt Petunia paused, looking oddly vulnerable. "… Okay," she said uncertainly at last.

Billie's and Miles's families looked concerned.

She left along with them. As the adults walked up ahead, Harry fell behind and whispered, "This is literally the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me. You definitely have a friend for life."

Billie giggled.

"It's just a good thing we have two days before the baking section begins," said Miles easily, good-natured and amused.

And so they all drove into the nearest town, and went around shopping and window shopping. "You agreed to taking my advice in fashion sense - lots of black and vintage," said Billie bossily. "We're getting you a new look first. But it's not just limited to clothes! Your aunt has your prescription. You need new glasses frames, too - and a new haircut."

She looked Harry over, frowning.

"See, your problem," she said, "is that you're not going with what you've been given. Fashion is all about matching up colors and shapes - or breaking them to make a statement, but I don't think you're doing that here."

Aunt Petunia was listening curiously despite herself.

"Your hair tries to go against the mess instead of with it. And it's all wrong for your face shape. You have this very thin diamond face - almost a heart, but with a nice jawline. And your glasses make your face look even thinner and more angular than it actually is. As for your clothes - you have this slimmer sort of designer body structure, so you need clothes that are slim but cover things like your knees and elbows. And with your coloring - pale skin, shiny black hair, bright green eyes - black is going to look fantastic on you. The vintage will add a little flair!"

She finished, pleased with herself.

So Billie's family bought Harry a new look - taking out cash and cards with awe-inspiring and impressive ease. They did the glasses and the haircut first. Billie recommended to Harry a less on sides, more volume on top haircut that swept over his forehead and his eyes - "to add emphasis to your eyes, which are really lovely, and the sweep goes with the mess." Then she got Harry a classic square black framed glasses structure.

"… I have to admit, you do look better. The classic look… is not bad. At least it's not… alternative," Aunt Petunia admitted, shuddering at the thought. "The hair is a bit messy, but… well, it is more tamed than I ever managed. We'll have to make sure Duddy doesn't break these new glasses and clothes," she added as an afterthought. "They were after all gifts. And they're nice-looking."

Harry looked up at her in slow disbelief. Was she saying… Dudley was no longer allowed to punch him around?

Aunt Petunia merely smiled grimly.

As Harry got a new, slim but long sleeved black and vintage look in clothes, he decided this baking camp he had been dreading was rapidly becoming one of the best things that had ever happened to him.

Harry also got that day a laptop to explore - he'd chosen Miles's interest in computers. And since he'd chosen Miles's interest in Japan and Billie's interest in feminism, he was also bought some anime DVDs for his laptop, and some books about feminism and about Japanese culture. He quickly found little games to play on his computer, an added bonus. Over the next couple of days, Harry would find an interest not only in computers but in games.

"I still have a lot to go through," he said in wonder just outside the town, looking down at his huge packages of gifts surrounded by everyone. "But I'll be able to learn a lot over the summer with all this!

"Th… thank you," he added painfully, blushing hot red and looking earnestly up at his new friends and teammates.

Billie smirked and put her hands on her hips. Miles smiled and pushed his glasses up his nose again. "Anytime!"

Aunt Petunia was watching thoughtfully.

"Now," said Billie as they walked back toward the cars, "you have hobbies and interests you can tell people about. If you don't know what you like, Harry, the easiest way is to learn through other people - especially people who can buy you things."

Harry would keep this advice over the following summers.

And he would shortly afterward begin his dive into learning more about his new chosen hobbies.

A couple of days later, Harry with his new look and hobbies intact was sitting at a work station with Billie and Miles, who he'd been talking to a lot lately, easy and smiling. There were other work stations throughout their white tent, while the families including Aunt Petunia stood off to the sides.

The three friends were talking warmly when the judges stood up at the front and the hubbub slowly quieted down.

"Now, everything's set in place," said the lead woman. "You've had days to pour over books of flavors and recipes to make your choices as to what to bake, as you will for every recipe we try. You each have an adult baker behind you to help you. And this is not a competition, it's not timed - you have all afternoon to make this.

"At the end of the afternoon, the judges will come around and judge what you have baked - individually, but in little groups. They will give you advice for how you could improve.

"Your first section is cakes, and your first recipe for today - called your signature - is a Swiss Roll. During a Signature, you have to take a basic outline of a recipe and make it your own. So today you're individualizing a Swiss Roll."

Everyone with their adult helpers assisting behind them began getting out their chosen recipes and ingredients and got to work. A great bustle and chatter filled the tent.

Harry focused with single-minded intensity on his own bake. He wanted to do well - on top of wanting to prove himself, which he did, his aunt was watching hawkishly from the sidelines.

Harry had chosen privately for himself out of the big books of recommendations a Cardamom, Pistachio, and Coffee Swiss Roll. It would have tiramisu filling, and little tree designs in Black Forest with Macadamia nut and hazelnut decorations to complete the trees.

Obviously, he leaned heavily on his adult helper this first time, but they also asked him opinion questions, and he slowly learned technique and began making tiny decisions for himself. He was very careful in not only making the sponge for the Swiss Roll, but in rolling it and in decorating it - he was methodical and meticulous. He did make the mistake of baking for a bit too long, so the roll did crack a little as he rolled it, but he thought the sponge wasn't too dry and the shape was just about perfect.

He also tried some experimental techniques he'd been thoughtful about, wanting to see if they made the Swiss Roll better. This was a learning experience, after all.

At the end of the afternoon, the timer went off and the judges began coming around from work station to work station.

Harry's was judged first within his little group.

"Mine is a Cardamom, Pistachio, and Coffee Swiss Roll. It has tiramisu filling, and tree designs in Black Forest with Macadamia nut and hazelnut decorations to finish off the trees."

So the judges tried the roll, and made comments.

"Good shape of the roll and the twist," the man said first, "and good flavor of sponge. This has a surprisingly classic look to it. But I see you trying a few techniques that were a bit out there - and they didn't quite work."

"The flavor is bold and very sharp, which is really lovely," said the woman. "Though the roll did crack a little when you rolled it, so slightly less baking would be advisable."

They moved on to Billie next. "Mine," she said proudly, "is a Pistachio and Strawberry Swiss Roll with lemon curd filling and pink butterflies and flowers in white chocolate."

So the judges tried hers.

"The decorations are wonderful, and the sponge is beautifully soft," said the woman. "But it's so soft the flavors bleed through. More baking would actually be advisable with you."

And finally came Miles's.

"I made a Chocolatey Orange Swiss Roll," he said slightly nervously, "with Japanese designs in light aniseed."

And they tried his.

"Not much of a roll," said the man frankly, surprised, "but an unusually good balance of tastes."

"Yes," said the woman, "this has wonderful flavors, but it's under-baked."

At the end before the judges left, Harry asked, "Do we get to keep these recipes we made?"

The judges looked back and smiled.

"Of course," said the man, "you just learned how to make your first recipe."

And they walked away, the adult helpers behind the children smiling quietly.

The next time they came into the tent: "The second part of your cake section," said the female judge, "is called your technical challenge. In this, you have to take an already set recipe, and not individualize it - but rather bake it to technical, traditional perfection.

"Your technical challenge is Cherry Cake with Toasted Almonds on Top."

And so they got to it. Harry got to individualize very little of the technical challenge, though he did do a spiderweb icing design on the top of the cherry cake, and he did choose to put more lovely toasted almonds and only a sparse amount of cherries by preference among the icing topping.

Again, at the end of the day, they stopped by his station first.

"A lovely golden brown bake," the man said first, "the almond decorating is good, and the almonds are well baked. The spiderweb icing is good. The cherries on top are a little sparse."

"The cake is a bit dry, slightly over-baked again," said the woman, "though the cherries are cut precisely and are fairly evenly distributed throughout the inside of the cake."

Next as usual came Billie.

"An even glaze icing. The icing has a good flavor."

"The cake is nice and moist with a beautiful run of cherries throughout, but here again we have an opposite - the cherries are wonderful on top, the almonds are not."

"Yes, and the icing is dripping off the side a bit."

And then as usual Miles came last.

"Delicate weaving lines icing design, I really like that. Expert distribution of cherries and almonds on top, and the icing is caught perfectly."

"The cherries are a bit off to one side of the cake on the inside, but the sponge is fair to good. The cherries inside are not chopped thinly enough, however, I can see big chunks."

"I would say here we have someone who is best at the technical aspects of baking."

The male judge smiled at Miles, who beamed back.

And finally for cakes: "Your showstopper is your finale. A showstopper is a challenge purposefully meant to be both individualized and difficult, so you can really strut your stuff at the end of each section.

"Today we would like you to make 36 identical miniature cakes of any kind, decorated. We had you prepare as usual. We asked you to come in the morning this time, and you have all day.

"Begin!"

Harry had chosen chocolate, coffee, and walnut Battenberg squares. He was trying the trickier Genoese sponge. He was putting mascarpone cream in the middle of each square, and he had a hazelnut and honeycomb crumble as his topping.

He had bought and put together a gadget ahead of time so he could cut them all perfectly evenly, and he went for a fairly simple aesthetic design, dark and minimalist, which suited him anyway in addition to being easier.

He was very careful in making these, and in making sure every single one was identical.

At the end of an exhausting day, the timer rang and everyone was judged again.

Harry's came first.

"I chose chocolate, coffee, and walnut Battenberg squares, with a Genoese sponge. I put mascarpone cream in the middle, and a hazelnut and honeycomb crumble on top."

And so they looked at and tried his.

"They are all cut perfectly evenly," said the woman. "That gadget I see there really helped."

"The design is overly simple," said the man, "but each one is baked perfectly with great precision."

"Yes, and the flavors work well together," added the woman.

Harry relaxed in glowing relief. Not only had the feedback been mostly good, but he hadn't over-baked this time.

Billie was next.

"I have Victoria sponge with raspberry jam, candied lemon, and fondant butterflies."

They tried hers.

"Good sponge," said the man, "and good lemon flavor."

"Yes, but we need more of the flavors besides the lemon, which overpowers," said the woman, "and again some of the flavors blended together. But the design is wonderful."

Miles was last.

"I made Jaffa orange cakes, with dark chocolate mousse, hand-made orange pastilles, and almonds."

"I see the same problem here," said the man, "not physically impressive and an uneven bake, but an excellent taste."

Miles was slightly downcast as the cake section came to an end and they all put their aprons away and left the tent that afternoon.

"I did the worst this section," he admitted. "Harry did loads better than me."

"The hard part's over with, mate," said Harry frankly, frowning. "The first thing a food is supposed to do is taste good."

"Yes. Everything else can be improved on," said Billie soothingly, putting a hand on Miles's shoulder. "And look at me! I under-bake everything and all my flavors run together. Harry did do well," she added admiringly.

"Yes, but I try weird things, have an overly simplistic minimalist design, and I can't stop over-baking just that little bit too much," said Harry. "It's infuriating to have your choices misalign with the judges and to always over-bake just that little bit too much."

"But you did well."

The three paused and looked over their shoulders in surprise. Aunt Petunia was standing there, reserved. She'd been watching all through the cake section from the sidelines with her sharp, beady blue eyes, but she hadn't made much comment yet.

"… Thanks," said Harry slowly, frowning, puzzled.

Miles and Billie smiled and kept walking.

"You're a good baker," said Aunt Petunia, walking beside Harry, "albeit a Minimalist, odd one with a love for chocolate, nuts, and caffeine."

Harry snorted and smiled. "… Thanks, Aunt Petunia," he said softly, because to his surprise he realized she meant it.

"… So," she said, still walking, "you have a new look. Thinking about trying your new hobbies?"

She gave him a sideways glance.

"Yes. As I bake further, I'll have to," said Harry decisively. "Learn more about computers and gaming, Japan, and feminism."

Harry Potter progress marker:

Traits: Feminism, Dressed in all black and vintage (including a less on sides more volume on top haircut that sweeps over the forehead and the eyes, and more classic square black framed glasses), Computer/game geek and Japan fanatic

Recipes:

Swiss Roll

Cardamom, Pistachio, and Coffee Swiss Roll - tiramisu filling - with tree designs in Black Forest and Macadamia nut and hazelnut decorations

Good shape, good flavor of sponge, surprisingly classic look, some experimental techniques that didn't quite work out, bold flavor and sharpness, a bit cracked

Cherry Cake with Toasted Almonds on Top

Spiderweb icing designs. Good golden brown bake. Good almond decorating and distribution, and good almond bake, though the cherries on top are a little sparse (by preference). A little bit dry, slightly over-baked, but the cherries are fairly even throughout the cake.

36 identical miniature cakes of any kind, decorated

Chocolate coffee and walnut Battenberg squares, trickier Genoese sponge, mascarpone cream middle, hazelnut and honeycomb crumble topping

Gadget for cutting them all evenly worked well, overly simple design, each baked perfectly with great precision, flavors good together

Author's Note: I've watched way too many episodes of the Great British Baking Show. Forgive me, for I am trash.