Title: Catch Me
Author: captstarbuck
Rating: PG
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Disclaimers – All television shows, movies, books, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work, and the characters, settings, and events thereof, are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for-profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context, and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
Summary: One-shot, post-epsiode 9.1
AN: Another detour into angst-land.
BETA:Thanks to pens_co who had an incredibly fast turn-around on the beta and deemed it "post-worthy".
Catch Me
Callie Torres tucked her daughter in for her nap. Sofia had been surprisingly well-behaved considering the circumstances. The one year old seemed to have instinctively picked up on the mood of all the people around her. She hadn't squirmed, giggled or even cried the entire time at the church or the cemetary.
"We'll be happy again, sweetie," Callie promised softly as she watched the little girl drift off to sleep.
Taking a deep breath, Callie opened the door to the bedroom. She wanted to crawl into her wife's arms and cry. She wanted… no, she needed to find comfort in her wife's arms.
"Arizona?" she asked in a quiet voice. "Can I get you anything?"
The blonde was either asleep or choosing to ignore her. Sighing deeply, Callie closed the door and returned to the main living area. She poured herself a large glass of wine and sat down on the sofa.
Going to Mark's funeral was one of the hardest things she'd ever done (having to make the decision to amputate her wife's leg was still number one). She stifled the sob that rose up in her throat when she thought about how the day had gone.
She hadn't wanted to bring Sofia with her, but she knew she couldn't leave her with Arizona. She had tried to explain to her wife that it was Mark's funeral and if Arizona couldn't – wouldn't – go, maybe she could watch Sofia for just a few hours. Her pleas had been met with stony silence.
The Latina had hoped to avoid her colleagues at the funeral, but Meredith and Derek had pulled her up to the front with them, relegating her to a position of one of the chief mourners. Their quiet kindness had surprised her and she had almost fallen to pieces multiple times. Flanked by Meredith and Derek's mother, Callie had somehow found the strength to get through the service and then again at the gravesite. Derek had let her go to the coffin last to say her final goodbye to her best friend in private. She'd been overwhelmed with gratitude as Mrs. Shepherd had held Sofia so Callie could step up alone and weep silently as she said farewell to Mark, her best friend and Sofia's daddy.
She begged off going to Meredith's house afterward where a small get together was being held. Callie couldn't take being treated like a widow; a widow two times over because to everyone else, except maybe Alex, Arizona was as good as dead, too.
The tears began coming down harder and Callie had never felt so alone. Mark wasn't there for her to run to anymore, and her wife… her wife had disappeared into a dark place and Callie didn't think she'd ever return.
Deciding against a second glass of wine, she picked up the phone and dialed the one person she knew would still be there for her.
"Hello?"
"Daddy?" she said, her voice choked with tears.
"Calliope? Calliope, what's wrong?"
"Daddy… I… I need you to catch me, Daddy," she cried.
"Mija, what's wrong? What's happened?" he asked, his voice full of concern.
"We buried Mark today, Daddy."
"Oh, Calliope, I'm so sorry." Despite his feelings and apprehensions for the man, Mark Sloan had been important to his daughter and his granddaughter, and therefore, he was important to Carlos Torres.
"He never recovered, Daddy," Callie cried. "He… we… we had to take him off life-support and he died. Sofia's daddy died and I lost my friend."
"I'm sorry, Mija. It must be so awful for you."
"It's… I don't know what I'm going to do, Daddy. Arizona's gone and –"
"What do you mean, Arizona's gone? She left?"
"No, She's still here, but she's gone. She's not Arizona any more, she's not the woman I married, Daddy and I don't know what to do anymore."
"She'll get better, Calliope. I believe she will get better and you have to believe it, too."
"She hates me, Daddy. She blames me for having to cut off her leg."
"Surely she understands it was her life or her leg?" Carlos recalled the conversation he'd had with his daughter only days after the surgery to remove his daughter-in-law's leg.
"She knows that, but she doesn't want to live anymore. I think the only thing that's keeping her alive right now is her hatred of me."
"She doesn't hate you, Calliope," he said understandingly. "Not really. She's angry. Her life has been unimaginably changed."
"I know that. I know that," Callie sniffled.
"Calliope, Arizona once told me that she protects the things she loves and that she's a good man in a storm. It's time for you to be that for her right now. Whatever it takes, you be that for her. "
"I will, Daddy."
"I know you will, Mija." He cleared his throat. "I will always catch you, Calliope, but now you need to catch Arizona."
"I love you, Daddy."
"I love you, too, Calliope. If you need anything…"
"I'll call you."
"I can be there in a matter of hours."
"I know." Callie sniffed back her tears once more. "Thank you, Daddy."
"Give your girls a kiss and hug from me. Both of them."
"I will."
"And call me again."
"I will, Daddy."
Callie ended the call with another heavy sigh. Her father was right. Time and time again, Arizona had been there for her and now it was her turn to do the same. Tough love hadn't worked. Kindness hadn't worked. She would have to find some other way to reach Arizona. This wasn't about her… it was about her wife. Whatever it took, Callie was determined to be Arizona's 'good man in a storm'.
Steeling herself, Callie walked into the bedroom.
"Arizona, I need to talk to you."
"Get out," came a muffled voice.
"No. I want to tell you something."
"What? Are you going to tell me to snap out of it again?" the blonde said, bitterness and sadness lacing her voice.
"No." Callie took a deep breath. "I'm not going anywhere, Arizona. I will be right here, always. I'm staying, not because of guilt or some wifely obligation. I love you, Arizona. And we will get through this together. You once told me 'I love you and you love me and none of the rest matters'. That was true then and it's true now, and it will always be true." She paused for a moment. "I'm not going anywhere, Arizona," she repeated.
After a long silence, Arizona finally spoke. "I'm falling, Callie," she said in a small voice. "I'm in a freefall that never ends."
"Then I'll catch you, Arizona. I'll be here with my arms open, ready to catch you when you're ready to stop falling."