A/N: yeah i basically wrote this like 2 months ago and forgot to post it whoooops
yeah this is basically just smu t haaha go for it friends
"Hey! Hey you, pretty boy!"
Jack sighed into his thick, most-definitely-illegal alien beverage. Tonight just wasn't his night. He had already been tossed out of one bar for flirting with the wrong person and ultimately getting his ass kicked to death by a justice-hungry Sontaran who had definitely been dishonorably discharged at some point in his career. It had taken him hours to heal and find a low enough place that no one would care or take notice of him. And now, it seemed as if his efforts were in vain.
Plastering on his most winning smile, he turned to meet his aggressor. "Captain Jack Harkness, if you will. And who are you?"
The person in question was a huge creature, greenish veins bulging visibly under blue skin. They let out a low sound which might have been a laugh or a growl. "I ain't interested in games, human. Do you know where you are?"
Jack thought for a moment, and shrugged. "A stinking low-life hellhole?"
The alien definitely chuckled this time, and then slammed a hand onto the wall next to Jack's head, attempting to make him wince. It didn't work, although it did leave a large crack in the plaster. "This bar is a no-humans-allowed zone. Ain't you know how'ta read?" They pointed to a small sign in the back, which featured a grotesque visage of a decapitated man with the words, "NO HUMANS ALIVE."
"Ah," Jack said, feigning innocence. In truth, he had noticed the sign, but had hoped that the rule wouldn't be enforced. Most of the time it wasn't, if you were lucky.
"So that means that my boys and I, we get to do that, see?" The alien gestured to the sign again. "We get to do it. It's our job." They grinned, their mouth a disgusting mangle of teeth and rotted flesh.
Jack paled slightly. "Now, now, boys, no need to get violent." He stood up, backing towards the door slowly. "We could all go home tonight perfectly healthy if you just let me go." He moved back another step and bumped into someone – ah, yes, their rear guard.
"Where d'ya think yer goin'?" the Judoon grunted down at him. "We was just gettin' star'ed." He reached for Jack with his meaty hands, and Jack braced himself for yet another death.
Suddenly, the lights went out. Several bar patrons began screaming, and Jack ducked down onto the floor, barely escaping the Judoon's fumbling grasp. He slipped underneath the alien's legs and dashed for the door, dodging around obstacles that he had noted earlier. He got to the door without so much as bumping into anyone – odd – and slammed through it, where he promptly tripped over the threshold and fell flat on his face. The door clicked shut behind him, and then there was silence.
Well, not really silence, exactly. There was a deep hum coming from the floor underneath his face, a floor that was most definitely not the street outside. "What-?" His question was cut short as he heard a noise – no, the noise. The most beautiful sound in all the world. It echoed around him, screeching and roaring, turning his frown into a smile of bliss.
"Aw, Doctor," he called, pulling himself into a sitting position and looking at his savior, "you shouldn't have."
"Yes, hello, Jack!" The Doctor pulled something on the dashboard with a flourish, spinning around as he did so, but pointedly not looking at his new passenger as he did. "Having fun on your own?"
"Not as much as I am now," Jack said, picking himself up off the floor. "What's the occasion?"
"Well," the Doctor said, drawing he word out in his typical fashion, "it's not so much an occasion as an… escape, if you will." He finally turned to face Jack, leaning back against the control panel. "I just managed to accidentally marry Queen Elizabeth, you see, and there is no way I'm going through all that again, I've had quite enough accidental marriages for one lifetime, let alone ten –"
"Wait." Jack stopped him with a hand. "Elizabeth – which one?"
The Doctor grimaced. "The first…"
Jack mimicked his expression. "Ooh, she's a feisty one, isn't she? I had a fling with her myself, once. Boy, that was an interesting weekend – she turned out to be a Zygon." He leaned into the Doctor's space slightly. "But that doesn't explain why I'm here. I thought the TARDIS didn't appreciate me."
The Doctor snorted. "She'll get over it." He slid out from underneath Jack's overbearing stance and moved lithely to the other side of the console, tapping on some buttons. After a few minutes of slightly awkward silence, the Doctor coughed. "I just… wanted someone I knew."
"What do you mean?" Jack raised his eyebrows slightly. The Doctor was acting sort of strange – more jittery than usual, if that was possible.
"I didn't want a stranger." That made even less sense than the previous statement. The Doctor always wanted strangers – he loved meeting new people. "For what, exactly?" Jack cocked his head to the side slightly, stepping towards the Doctor with an inquisitive expression. "Doctor, is something wrong?" He reached out to place a hand on the Doctor's shoulder, the owner of which was, again, pointedly not looking at him.
As soon as Jack's hand made contact, the Doctor spun around and grabbed his face, mashing their lips together. Jack made a sound of surprise, but didn't push away, victory cries already running through his head as the very thing he had wanted for so long finally came to fruition. Then the warning bells belatedly overrode the victory, and he (very reluctantly) pushed the Doctor away.
"Are you okay?" Jack panted, and the Doctor, for once, didn't look ashamed of himself at all.
"I'm perfectly fine! I just married a queen and then ran away without even saying goodbye and I've already born the brunt of her revenge in the past!" the Doctor yelled, "And now I've really got nothing else to do and I may or may not be dying soon and it's been years since I've actually done anything besides kiss someone and let me tell you even that's a relatively new occurrence and I just," he grabbed Jack's shoulder's desperately, "want to have sex with you!"
Jack stared at the Doctor in shock. That wasn't what he expected. Not at all.
Then something struck him. I may or may not be dying soon. "Wait, Doctor, did you say that you're going to… die?" Jack frowned. "Like, die-die? Or just regenerate?" Dread rose up in his chest. Would the Doctor run off and forget him again, if he got a new face? Or was this worse?
The Doctor sagged, suddenly, and Jack's arms instinctively wound around him. "I don't know," the Time Lord whispered into Jack's shoulder. "Either way, it's the end of me. I won't be coming back, not the same way." He straightened up again, leaning back out of Jack's embrace to look the Captain in the eye. "Early on in this form, I decided that my self-induced celibacy was… er, detrimental to my health. But then…" He sighed. "Then reality got in the way." Jack nodded; he knew how that felt. He hadn't gotten a proper lay in almost six months, by his reckoning, which was a very long time in the sex life of Captain Jack Harkness.
"So you came to me?" Jack couldn't help but smirk. Apparently he really had gotten to the Doctor, after all of his flirting; he had felt a spark of chemistry between them during the Time Lord's previous regeneration, but it hadn't really had time to come to fruition, and by the time actual contact was established, it had been too late. "I'm not trying to look a gift horse in the mouth, but why me?"
The Doctor had the decency to look abashed as he said, "Well… you're the best. Literally, you have a reputation that precedes you in the future. There's actually a position named after you –" Jack raised his eyebrows, intrigued, and the Doctor snapped his mouth shut. "Not gonna tell you what it is, then I'd have invented it, technically, and that's no fun."
Jack snorted. "That's time travel."
"That's cheating!" The Doctor looked put out at Jack's casual shrug of dismissal, but kept going. "And there's the fact that… well, I don't have many people left, really. Martha's married, now, and Donna was never an option, of course, and Rose is… Rose." The man grew sad and distant as he spoke, and Jack couldn't help but tighten his grip and pull the Doctor closer, until their foreheads rested together. He could feel the man's sorrow through the base telepathic connection that this action established, and he allowed some of his own loneliness show through, to tell the Doctor that he wasn't alone, even after all that had happened.
"I know exactly how you feel," Jack whispered, and closed the distance between their lips.
This time, the kiss was slow and simple, each savoring the moment for different reasons, but savoring nonetheless. They explored each others' mouths, Jack running his tongue along the slightly different ridges on the roof of the Time Lord's mouth, pulling his hands through the Doctor's overly-gelled, fluffy hair. After a minute of making out, Jack moved to the side, and discovered that the Doctor intensely enjoyed his ears being played with. As Jack sucked on one earlobe, the Doctor pressed his body flush against him, and the time agent could feel the alien's arousal against his thigh. Encouraged by this reaction, Jack moved his leg up to meet his partner's crotch.
With a sudden intake of breath, the Doctor grabbed Jack's face, pulling him back up to kiss him ferociously. He pushed them both towards the railing, coming to a stop as Jack's back came up against the cold metal. The Doctor pushed the army coat off of Jack's shoulders, hanging it haphazardly on the top rung with one hand as he pulled off Jack's suspenders with the other.
Jack pulled off the Doctor's suit jacket, the one with the pinstripes, he noted, and his vest, not even bothering to find a place to put them and just tossing them on the floor. He tried to undo the buttons on the Time Lord's shirt, but was stopped as the Doctor pressed him against the rails, ravaging his neck with a ferociousness seldom seen. That is definitely going to leave a mark, Jack thought gleefully as he felt the Doctor's lips suck at his skin. He felt hands pull the shirt tails from his trousers, and lithe fingers run along his waistline with equal amounts of lust and uncertainty. The Doctor's hands made their way to Jack's belt buckle, undoing it easily even with his shaking fingers. Breaking away from Jack's neck, the Doctor already looked properly disheveled, hair sticking in odd angles, lips swollen to perfection. The Time Lord affixed Jack with the gaze that would have enemies shaking in their boots, staring him down as he sank slowly to his knees. Still looking straight into Jack's eyes, the Doctor undid the time agent's trousers fully and reached his right hand into his pants.
At the first touch of the Doctor's hand, Jack inhaled sharply through his nose. It really had been too long. He held his breath as the Doctor pulled his cock from his pants, not even daring to blink for a moment, in case he woke up and found that this had all been some sort of death-induced hallucination.
Finally, the Doctor broke eye contact to focus on his task. He eyed the penis in front of him slightly apprehensively, and leaned forward just a bit to rest his lips against it. He was not at all surprised at the size; Jack's reputation really did precede him, after all, and it was common knowledge within the red light districts how large Jack Harkness' rather impressive length really was. Some of the rumors about it were a bit ridiculous, though – the Doctor chuckled breathily against Jack's cock as he remembered one heavily inebriated woman who swore up and down that it was an entire foot long.
"What's wrong, Doctor?" Jack grinned down at the kneeling Time Lord, who was hesitating just enough that Jack could officially make fun of him for it. "Never seen anything like it?"
The Doctor rolled his eyes, not bothering to look up. "Do you know how long it's been?" he shot back. He didn't allow Jack the liberty of an answer, however, taking most of his cock into his mouth in one go. Jack gasped outright at the unexpected contact, grabbing onto the railing behind him to steady himself. God, that felt amazing. Long it may have been, but the Doctor sure knew how to handle himself while giving a blowjob. Jack felt a shiver of pleasure shoot up his spine as the head of his cock brushed the ridges on the roof of the Time Lord's mouth. His own mouth dropped open as the Doctor began to bob back and forth. Small whines escaped from the back of Jack's throat, combining with a harsh panting – Is that me making those noises? I sound like a teenager again! The thought was quickly ignored, for the Doctor had begun to hum low in his throat, and the vibrations shook all the way through Jack's very being.
Jack was surprised to feel his orgasm already building, and then thought twice of it. The pleasure alone would have sent a lesser man shooting over the edge in an instant; but that combined with the image of the Doctor on his knees, those beautiful lips wrapped around his cock like they belonged there, almost had Jack crying for release. He wouldn't allow himself to it, though, not yet. There was still so much to do. With great reluctance, he let go of the railing with one hand and pulled the Doctor up and away from his dripping cock.
"Sorry to interrupt you, Doc," Jack panted, "but I'm not going to settle for a simple blowjob here, and neither are you." He looked pointedly at the Time Lord's crotch, which looked rather uncomfortable. "So how about we move on to bigger things." Jack leaned forward and kissed the Doctor's swollen lips, tasting his own pre-cum on the man's tongue. They moved as one towards the center of the room, Jack pressing the Doctor against the console. He made quick work of the alien's dress shirt, pulling away to tug the undershirt over his head. Jack stopped for a moment to admire the Doctor's lean torso, ribcage visibly heaving under the skin, waist trim and delicate for a man's, a trail of fine hair pointing Jack towards his destination. He grabbed onto the Doctor's hip bones, relishing their defined points, and then sunk his hands lower, into the Doctor's waistband. He heard the Time Lord suck in a breath as his fingers brushed the swollen erectile tissue of his penis.
That breath was all it took to break any last hint of hesitance. In one swift motion, Jack was on his knees, taking the Doctor's cock fully into his mouth, deepthroating him as far as he could go (which was very far). "Oh my God," the Doctor breathed, and Jack glanced up at his Doctor's face, the face he had fallen in love with so quickly. While he sucked, Jack guided the Time Lord's right hand to his hair, allowing the other man to take control, essentially fucking his face as he pleased. Jack felt his cock harden even more at the feeling of being possessed fully by the one who already held everything else: his heart, his devotion, his very life. This was the feeling of pure and utter bliss, no orgasm needed.
But having one would still be nice, and the Doctor seemed to agree with him on this. He pulled Jack's head away by his hair, and Jack relinquished the cock in his mouth regretfully. He stood up and all but attacked the Doctor's face, mashing their lips together, the taste of human and Gallifreyan semen mixing easily in their shared saliva. Jack attempted to liberate the other man of his pants, but was stopped by a smack of the Time Lord's hand. He made a sound of surprise as the Doctor grabbed his waist and flipped their positions, pinning Jack against the dashboard.
"Oh, no. This is my moment," the Doctor growled into Jack's ear, and goddamn that was just so sexy Jack could hardly stand it (his knees actually grew weak), "and that means I get to fuck you."
"Oh god," Jack stuttered, his voice quivering because the Doctor had just used one of the dirtiest curse words known to man and if that wasn't the most attractive thing in the history of time then he didn't know what was.
"That's right, Captain Jack Harkness." At the use of his full name, Jack groaned in anticipation. "I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk, then you're going to return the courtesy, until neither of us can leave this ship without crawling on our hands and knees." The Doctor ripped Jack's trousers from his legs, pulling his shoes off with them. He stood back up and stared Jack straight in the face. "Now, where's your lube?"
Jack stood in shock for a moment, and then snapped back into action. "S-second pocket on the right." The Doctor moved to search the time agent's coat. "No, no, the other second pocket." He looked back at Jack with an exasperated look. "Hey, not everyone's got a beautiful space ship to store all of their sex toys! I gotta make do." At this comment, Jack could swear that he heard the TARDIS rumble appreciatively under him. He patted the console, just in case.
"Right!" Jack refocused his attention on the beautiful, beautiful man in front of him (as if he had ever looked away). The man in question had a small bottle in his hand and a look of intense lust on his face. "Let's get to it, shall we?" The rhetorical question was quickly answered as the Doctor pushed Jack up onto the flattest part of the console, kissing him ferociously. He broke away quickly and popped the cap of the lube, pouring a large amount on his right hand. Jack relaxed as the Doctor's fingers circled around his entrance, and the first digit slid in easily, all the way up to the third joint. A second finger was quickly added, then a third.
"My, my, you are loose, aren't you?" the Doctor murmured, scissoring his fingers.
"I'm always ready for you, Doctor." Jack grinned at him, face flushed.
The Time Lord made a strangled noise in the back of his throat, eyes wide. An emotion seemed to well up in his eyes then, but he shoved it down in favor of lust. Pulling his fingers out of Jack's ass, he poured more lube onto his hand, coating himself generously with the slick substance.
"Wait, wait." Jack held up his hand. "You don't have any weird Time Lord STDs or anything, do you?"
"Jack, I haven't had sex in almost three hundred years, and four or five regenerations to boot," the Doctor sighed. "I don't think STDs last that long, and besides, Time Lords genetically enhanced themselves to abolish such things eons ago." He smirked, then, his hair flopping down around his perfectly flushed face. "You have nothing to worry about."
Jack grinned back. "I was kidding, now please do something productive before I explode."
The Doctor didn't need to be told twice. Carefully, he slid his slick cock into Jack's ass, the time agent relaxing to allow for the now-familiar intrusion to normalize. As soon as the Time Lord was fully sheathed, Jack wrapped his legs around the other man's hips, gripping forcefully. "Oh shit," he whispered, still amazed that this was even happening. Fuck.
Then the Doctor started to move, and Jack was officially lost in the sensations, in the sight of his Doctor fucking him on the console of the TARDIS and the feeling of fullness inside him, a fullness that he had never really achieved until this moment. The Doctor hit his prostate and he cried out loudly, his voice echoing through the room.
"F-fuck," the Doctor whined, his face twisting as he neared his orgasm. He reached down and pumped Jack's cock with his right hand, and it was so much better than that hand Jack had salvaged from underneath the Sycoraxian ship all those Christmases ago. The rhythm increased, their pleasure augmenting into one peak until they were thrusting wildly against each other, and then the Doctor came, yelling incoherently, quickly followed by Jack, screaming the Doctor's name.
The pace abruptly slowed, and the Doctor put in a few more thrusts before extracting himself, leaning heavily against the dashboard next to Jack. Jack untangled his legs from around the Doctor's waist and just lied there, basking in the afterglow and the Time Lord's warmth.
After a few minutes of companionable silence, the Doctor stood and held his right hand to Jack. The human eyed it lazily for a moment before summoning the courage to grasp it, hoisting himself off the console with no small amount of effort. He went to gather his clothes when he was stopped by a hand.
"Leave them," the Doctor said, a smile on his lips. "I have a feeling you won't be needing them for a while." He fully removed his own pants and shoes as he said this, tossing them to the side.
Jack smirked. "Is that so, Doctor?" he replied. "Well, I'll grab my coat." Ignoring the slow burn in his lower body, he snatched up the article of clothing and laid it over his arm. "I have a feeling we'll be needing things from it for a while." He leaned into the Doctor's space, and was pleased when the Time Lord didn't lean away, and instead wrapped an arm around his waist and began leading him down the hallway.
"Now, how about I show you the Captain Jack Harkness?" the Doctor said.
"I thought that was cheating," Jack chuckled.
"Jack," the Doctor laughed, "have I ever played by the rules?"
And for the moment, everything was right.