Title: The Sound of Silence
Pairing: Arizona/Callie
Rating: R
Summary: Speculation after the crash.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I do not intend to profit in any way, shape or form by posting this story. It's for fun, nothing more, and nothing less.
A/N: I started this after episode 8x23, so I didn't have all the info that happened in the finale, so not all things are as they were in the finale. This is most likely a one shot.
The silence is unbearable.
The smell of burnt flesh lingers in the air.
Not just the scent of burnt flesh, but burning embers still actively devouring oxygen and just a hint of gasoline.
I've witnessed disasters. I've been a part of them; running in to save lives; directing others on what to do; observing things from a radio away.
Oh yes, I've witnessed disasters and there is always chaos.
But not here.
This silence is unbearable.
The lower half of my body has finally numbed enough to where the pain is just a dull ache. Mark's eyes were wide with worry, but I'm pretty sure his freak out was more concern for Lexie than me. From what I could hear of the whispers, Lexie appears to be stuck under the tail of the plane. She has obvious internal injuries, from what I could overhear. And Mark sounded distraught. It was unnerving to hear.
We didn't have much medical equipment with us, but luckily, we're responsible doctors and most of us had bags with us. They only hold bare minimum supplies and only a few of the bags survived the crash. Thankfully though, the pilot is alive; he's been messing with the radio, trying to get it to work.
I don't know how much time has passed, I've been having trouble staying focused for a while and I think I've been slipping into short naps to help cope with the pain. I'm sure this is nothing like what Lexie is feeling. I know Mark has been with her, watching her, doing everything in his power to keep her well. He's a good man, a good father, I'm glad he wasn't hurt. Sofia doesn't deserve to lose two parents.
I can't help but close my eyes at that thought. I need to keep positive. I can't leave Callie, or Sofia, not now. Callie said she'd never leave me. My eyes gaze down at my legs thankful Mark covered the left with a clean blanket.
A moment later, Cristina is leading Meredith toward me. They were off searching for Derek. She glances at Meredith, who looks like she's in shock as she turns back to me as they continue to walk.
"He's dead," Cristina says, not bothering to stop with the words.
I hear Mark's voice next behind me, cracking in pain, "She's dead too." He responds.
I can hear their hushed whispers behind me and the crackling of dead leaves under their feet as they walk away from where I am.
How could this have happened? Will I get to see Callie again..?
The last time I felt this alone was when Callie and Sofia were dying and Mark was yelling at me that I was nothing…
Why is there so much silence..? This silence unbearable… I can't take it anymore and I scream as loud as I possibly can before blackness surrounds me.
Arizona grunted in pain as she shifted in the hospital bed. Her head was swimming, her stomach was churning, her lungs screamed in pain with each breath, bruises littered her body and her face, and her right leg was screaming for some miracle of attention, some drug to put it out of its misery, but she'd currently hit her limit of morphine. But hey, she felt nothing from her left leg.
Panic fluttered through her entire being and she pulled the covers off her legs and groped at her left calf, then thigh. It was still there. Her foot was still there too. Everything was present. She still had a left leg, she just couldn't feel it. She glanced down at the track marks showing proof of surgery and sighed at how dark and marred her skin appeared.
She leaned back in the bed and whimpered a soft breath, holding back tears. Today, Callie would arrive and it would be the first time they've seen each other since the crash two days ago. She felt nervous, pain, and a little high. That thought made her want to giggle, but it sounded more like a strangled cry.
A nurse walked in, "Are you okay, Dr. Robbins?"
Arizona smiled slightly, it didn't reach her eyes and it was obvious to the nurse she was forcing it, "Just fine… Tell me, is my wife here yet?"
The nurse walked to her bed and patted her left foot, she couldn't feel the touch. "No, not yet… They had some trouble deciding on how to get here, given the circumstan-..."
Arizona interrupted her midsentence, "She didn't want to fly. I get it… I don't want her to fly either. Always feel closer to death in a plane… especially now." She wanted to flop her arms, but knew pain would be involved and decided to lie rather still.
The nurse stared for a few moments, her mouth moving, but nothing coming out. Arizona thought she looked like a clown fish, her bright orange hair, black eyeliner and white skin. She rolled her eyes and turned to look up to the ceiling, "I'm sure you have other patients that need you more than me."
The nurse looked offended at being dismissed in this way, but she spun and left the room.
Arizona sighed deeply and it just caused a flare of pain in her lungs as she released the breath. She'd been in constant pain, physically and emotionally since the crash. The pilot was fine of course, kept muttering about changes in air pressure and a sudden drop in air flow, but she didn't care. All she knew is two of her friends were dead; the most talented neurosurgeon in the country, probably the world gone in the blink of an eye; and one of the most promising surgical residents she'd ever worked with.
Who knew what was happening with Meredith right now. Arizona couldn't hold in a loud sob. Just thinking of Callie being left in that position, after the hard week they had gone through with Nick. And another promise Arizona broke, Nick passed away while she was in the middle of nowhere hurt and basically alone.
Nick was alone when he died, so much for that promise.
She was alone when she almost died, so much for that promise with Callie too.
Mark was standing outside of Meredith's examination room, glancing inside. Cristina's hand was wrapped in Meredith's, who was lying in bed, staring into space. Meredith's eyes were glazed over and she hadn't moved since being put in the bed hours ago. Cristina was worried. Meredith seemed to have lost her light. Cristina looked up at him and they shared a look before she shook her head and turned back to Meredith.
Mark sighed deeply. They would be sent back to Seattle soon, but Meredith would be placed in a psychiatric hospital. She appeared to be stuck in a catatonic state and nothing Cristina has tried has changed that. She lost the love of her life and sister within minutes of each other from a plane crash which she was injured in as well. How does one bounce back from that?
He turned on his heels and headed toward the other room, where Arizona was being treated. He was so glad that Arizona was alive. He didn't know if he would have been able to tell Callie any worse news than they already told her. He felt this emptiness in his heart and his soul and he knew this feeling would break Callie, much worse than George or Erica ever did. And his little girl would break without her other Mom. He didn't even want to contemplate that thought. He was about to poke his head into the room when he heard sniffles and sobbing. Arizona was breaking in that room and he just couldn't fathom talking to her right now, so he walked past the door to the nurses' station. A smile and clever line later he was walking into a supply closet with a nurse.
Twenty minutes later a frantic Calliope Torres was wandering the halls of Yakima Regional (a small hospital in the city of Yakima, Washington, twenty miles from the crash site), Sofia latched to her hip, diaper bag and purse on her shoulder. She had the news. She knew that Arizona was alive and injured, but they said they would explain more in person. She knew Derek and Lexie were dead and that Cristina, Mark and Meredith had just minor abrasions. She knew Meredith was nonresponsive and that Cristina and Mark seemed fine.
But how could anyone be fine after being in a plane crash?
Callie almost didn't go to see her wife and best friend after the day she had. April Kepner was brought into the ER at SGMW the prior day and despite everything, she and Owen could not resuscitate her. Avery said he went to Joe's to talk to her, but she was to upset and drunk to bother listening and she ran off. Not even a minute later an SUV plowed into her. She was gone before she made it to the hospital. And once she was digesting that bit of information a call came from Boise Memorial. The panic set it and rumbled in her brain and swirled in her stomach as they asked where the surgeons from Seattle Grace-Mercy West were. Owen immediately started calling channels and Callie did her best not to pull her hair out from worry.
Hours later, she was making arrangements for her and Sofia to fly into Yakima with Owen via helicopter.
She was almost to the nurses' station when a door opened and out walked a nurse, fixing her scrubs followed by Mark Sloan. Her jaw fell into her cleavage and it took a moment for the shock to wear off. She slapped his arm hard. Several times. Sofia giggled and squealed and then started to hit Mark as well.
"Hey, hey, stop!" Mark cried and held up a hand.
"What are you doing?" Callie hissed her voice low. She didn't want to alert Arizona she was here until she could go and talk to her and she knew this was the right floor.
"I'm grieving," he answered and crossed his arms.
"By sticking your penis in random places?" Callie cried and slapped him again. Mark moved his hands over Sofia's ears and dropped his jaw. Sofia giggled and patted her hands against her fathers.
"Not exactly random… Besides it's better than feeling anything else. I'll grieve however I choose too. And no saying that word in front of her until she's thirty." Mark crossed his arms again.
Callie rolled her eyes and shook her head, "What about Julia? You know, that really lovely woman you've been dating for months who wants to have a child with you?"
Mark's face went red and he lowered it into Callie's face and spoke with a firm voice, but it was low and dangerous, "Julia means nothing to me. She was a place holder. I was waiting for Lexie, playing house, trying to move on, being pushed on by you and Arizona and wanting the best for Sofia, but I was wrong! And then I waited too long. And she finally tells me she loves me and then the fucking plane crashes and crushes her! So don't you stand there and tell me how to grieve when Arizona is sitting in a room waiting for you."
Sofia started crying and lowered her face into Callie's neck, Mark's tone obviously setting her off. Callie went to respond, but Mark turned and walked away from her. He was breaking in front of her eyes and throwing away everything he had for a ghost. She took a moment to ponder his words, she did have Arizona… and if she didn't have Arizona, she wasn't sure what she would be doing now. Maybe he was right and she shouldn't criticize the way he's handling his loss.
Callie took a moment to regroup and then spoke to a nurse quickly, who pointed out Arizona's room. She stepped over to the door and opened it. She stood in the door way staring at Arizona. She felt all the air leaving her lungs and a sense of relief flood her entire system. Her Arizona was beautiful, even with the cuts and bruises on her face. She was so gloriously alive and Callie wanted to do cartwheels and jumping jacks like a cheerleader and let the happiness she felt explode from her body in that moment.
Sofia whining and trying to escape her arms brought her back to her senses. Sofia's little chubby arms were reaching for Arizona. She glanced at Sofia and then followed her line of sight, directly into Arizona's beautiful bright blue eyes. They looked into one another's eyes and it was as if the world stood still. No sound, no air, only brown and blue meeting in a hospital room. Callie's eyes finally moved over Arizona's face, riddled with angry red marks and black and blue bruises. "Oh Arizona…" She wasn't told much about the crash, but Arizona still looked fairly sick, which meant she probably was even worse when they brought her in.
Arizona's eyes filled with tears and she turned away from them both just as Callie finally moved forward. She stepped up to the bed and caressed Arizona's cheek, her hand moving to her chin to force her to make eye contact again. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry…" she whispered as she leaned in and pressed her lips softly to Arizona's. They both closed their eyes and savored the taste of one another. "I love you," Callie said, the words a solemn vow and Arizona felt them surround her in Callie's love. Sofia squealed happily, her hands tugging Arizona's hair, breaking the spell.
"Hey, oww…" Arizona whined, but behind the words were a small giggle. The sound made Callie's heart soar and she sniffled back her own tears. Arizona looked into her eyes and kissed her again while they were still close.
Callie tugged a chair closer and sat down, putting Sofia in her lap. Arizona's hand gently tickled Sofia's cheek and she clapped at her. "I couldn't leave her, but I also knew she would want to see you. She's so happy, look at that face."
They both watched Sofia for a moment, before they looked at one another again. "God, Arizona… I was so scared; I can't imagine how it must have been for you."
Arizona blinked her eyes, trying to hold back her tears. "Calliope, it was terrible…" And she finally started crying. Callie maneuvered herself so that she could hold Arizona, who laid her head on her shoulder and keep Sofia in her arms as well. "Everything was s-so silent… And the smell…"
"Shh, cry," Callie said softly, her free hand running through Arizona's hair. All the things they went through together, but Arizona was alone during this. And she missed Nick passing away. She was so angry about Nick waiting so long only to end up getting a death sentence and then Karev leaving her, she just couldn't let Karev go on this trip. Callie understood it, but she didn't like it. And she nearly took Karev's head off when she found out about the crash.
The family sat huddled together. Even Sofia seemed to understand that this moment was important, so she just cooed softly and leaned against Callie while Arizona cried into Callie's shoulder. It wasn't often that the blonde would open herself up in this way and Callie felt fortunate to be the one that got all of Arizona's colors, not just the perky pink side. She also got the dark blues, reds, and blacks when Arizona was dark and twisty. She couldn't help but wonder if this was Arizona at her lowest, or if she was worse when Tim died.
"D-did Nick… did he suffer?" Callie sucked in a deep breath and tensed at Arizona's question. "I n-need to know. He was supposed to go to Belize and sit on a b-beach; I wouldn't h-have gone if I knew he was g-going to d-d…"
Callie's heart broke when Arizona couldn't even say the word. "I know, sweetie, I know..." Callie murmured while kissing the top of Arizona's head. "No one knew the turn he was going to take, but I was with him. I cancelled my schedule and stayed with him. He knew you would have been, but I explained where you were and he looked proud, Arizona. So proud of you. I can see that he thought of you as a sister. So we talked until he couldn't talk anymore. And he said…" Callie licked her lips and did her best to hold her tears at bay, this was Arizona's moment and she needed to be her rock now, "He said, 'Tell Glendale that I love her and that I'll be with Tim, watching her and her hot wife.'" Callie chuckled while running her free hand through Arizona's hair, "I swear, that guy knows every city in Arizona."
Arizona's whimpers became soft giggles at Callie's comment. "I think he used to look t-them up when we were k-kids. It just sort of s-stuck and became a thing he and… T-Tim did. I think they were helping me get t-thicker skin, because they knew I'd be p-picked on. They always looked out for me."
"He was a great guy. Sounds like your brother was too." Arizona whimpered again and started crying into her shoulder. "He didn't suffer. Teddy and I were there and we made sure to keep him comfortable. I'm sorry you heard it through the grapevine, instead of from me."
"I should have been there with him. I p-promised him…" Arizona whispered quietly.
"I explained everything to him, Arizona. Do you know how proud of you he was?" Callie asked as she watched Arizona intently. When there was no answer, she continued, "He said he always knew you were going to be a success. That he and Tim always knew you were going to help people in some way and the fact you devoted your life to children simply amazed him. He was sad about the circumstances and that past pain led him to make a terrible mistake, but he was so happy he got to see you. To see you happy and in love… he said I was a miracle to come into your life because he hadn't seen you that happy since before…" her voice cracked and as she took a moment to swallow, Arizona continued.
"Since before Tim," Arizona leaned back so she could look at her wife and child. "And he was right, you know? You fixed me in a way that I never thought possible…" Arizona licked her lips and smiled down at Sofia, who was distracted with something on Callie's wrist. "Sometimes, I forget to hurt when I think about Tim and I only have fond memories. That never happened before you."
Callie smiled widely and reached out to caress Arizona's cheek. She gently brushed her thumb over her cheekbone and then tilted her head slightly. "I love you. And I'm so happy you're alive. You survived a plane crash, Arizona. A plane fell out of the sky and you are injured and I'm not happy about that, but you are alive, Arizona. Thank you for not dying," by now, tears were streaming down her face.
Arizona smiled; it was full and her dimples popped and it made Callie want to melt. She grunted as she moved to press a kiss on Callie's lips, "You made me a promise and I made the same one to you. I won't ever leave."
Callie's smile was magnificent and for a moment, Arizona forgot about all the pain in her body and all the loss in her heart. But that moment was short lived as she took another breath and her chest reminded her of just how injured she was. Callie eyed her wearily and gently caressed her cheek. "You're going to be fine, Arizona."
Arizona nodded slightly and looked down at her left leg. The leg she couldn't feel. And she was suddenly assaulted with tears again as she stared into Callie's eyes.
"Hey, hey…" Callie whispered and did her best to calm Arizona while holding Sofia in her arms. She tilted her head slightly and forced Arizona to look into her eyes, "Look, we don't know anything yet, so we'll talk to the doctors here and then we'll know." She waited until Arizona nodded and then turned Sofia and sat the little girl on the bed in front of Arizona. The pair lost themselves in their little girl, but Callie watched Arizona closely and she knew something was going on with her wife by the faraway look that often crossed her face.
"I'm tired, Calliope," Arizona said softly and Callie could see that she wasn't lying, but she wasn't exactly being truthful either. "Why don't you and Sofia get some dinner and I'll take a nap." Callie nodded, but said nothing while gathering her things and then lifting Sofia into her arms. Sofia immediately started reaching for Arizona and whimpered softly.
Callie reached in and kissed Arizona gently and then held Sofia out to her so Arizona could kiss Sofia's head. "We'll be back in a bit, get some rest, honey." Callie smoothed her hand over Arizona's forehead while Arizona smiled up at her and nodded. She then turned and headed out of the room, turning to watch her wife once more as she stared up at the ceiling, tears streaming down the side of her face. Callie bit her lip and forced herself to leave.
And then Arizona was left in the unbearable sound of silence in her hospital room, consumed with fear and loss.
Two weeks in a hospital bed should have been driving Arizona crazy, but it wasn't. Instead, it was driving Callie crazy. Callie was scared; terrified that she may have completely lost part of her wife due to this horrific crash. Lexie was dead; Mark was screwing anything and everything that moved; and Arizona lay in a bed like a dead fish. She talked and acted almost normal, but there was something off. Something was missing. The gleam in her eye was gone. The childlike wonder she once looked at the world with suddenly morphed into an uncaring coldness. Callie felt the change in Arizona, she heard it in how Arizona spoke to her and she saw it all over the face of her wife.
And she was powerless to stop it. She felt like a bystander watching her life fall to pieces.
Callie took a deep breath and straightened herself while standing by the window of Arizona's room. She watched as Arizona watched television quietly. The television in her hospital room was never off. Books, magazines, pediatric journals sat untouched on a small table near the bed. A tray of untouched food was beside the bed as well, which made Callie sigh deeply. She can't remember the last time Arizona had truly eaten anything and it was starting to show on her frame. Mark, Karev, and Bailey had all said something to her and she had no idea how to respond.
She felt lost and unsure, and completely herself. She was off balance and it was hard to get back to her equilibrium while watching Arizona fall apart before her very eyes. She looked into the room again and Arizona was just sitting and staring at the television screen. She felt her heart drop into her stomach and swirl around, which forced her to take another deep breath, trying to settle that troublesome feeling within her. Once settled, she put on a smile and stepped into the room.
"Hey, how are you feeling this morning?" She said as she stepped inside and to the side of Arizona's bed. She dropped a brown bag on the tray next to Arizona's bed after pushing the tray full of food a bit. She kissed Arizona's cheek and then sat down while taking hold of her hand.
"Oh, I'm doing well. Still on the good drugs," Arizona winked at Callie and forced a smile.
Callie felt her stomach drop at the act Arizona was putting on, but just smiled and patted her hand. "I'm sure they'll be weaning you off soon."
Arizona's head snapped at Callie and she spoke in a firm voice, "Maybe when the pain goes away, they will!"
Callie's mouth dropped at the tone and quickly closed it, swallowing the feeling of complete helplessness that she found herself in at that moment.
Arizona cleared her throat, "I'm sorry, I'm just… I'm still in a lot of pain everywhere, except the one place I should be feeling it." She frowned slightly and pointed at her left leg, but then she forced her face to perk up with a small smile, "Did you know that there are television shows about people who go around the country and pick through trash? Why would anyone want to watch that?"
Callie smirked, "You know about it, I assume you watched it."
Arizona blushed and turned back to the television, "There was nothing else on at four in the morning."
"You haven't been sleeping." Callie said with an edge to her voice in the statement.
"I'm fine, Calliope," Arizona responded without turning away from the television.
"If you say so," Callie mumbled while she grabbed the brown bag she came in with. Arizona didn't say anything, but Callie was sure she spoke loud enough for her to hear. "I brought you some doughnuts from the place you like downtown. I had to stand in line for over forty-five minutes," she scoffed while pulling a doughnut from the bag and holding it out to Arizona.
Arizona's eyes remained on the television, "Thank you, that was nice of you, but really, the hospital food has been fine and I'm not—"
"The hospital food has been fine?" Callie cut her off while shaking her head. "That's why there's a tray full of untouched food here, right?" Callie's hand gestured to the tray, not that Arizona was watching. "Eat the damn doughnut," she thrust it into Arizona's face.
Finally, blue eyes landed on Callie again and there was a hard edge behind them as they narrowed a gaze at Callie. She forcefully took the doughnut from Callie, took a bite, chewed it, swallowed, and then opened her mouth, sticking her tongue out so Callie could inspect and see that the morsel of food disappeared. "Happy now?" She dropped the rest of the doughnut on the tray and turned back to the television. "You know what, I didn't sleep so well last night, why don't you go and I'll try and sleep some."
Callie felt tears gather in her eyes and that annoying irritation that came with crying at the back of her throat. She swallowed it down painfully and willed herself not to cry. "But I just got here and I wanted to spend some time with you."
"You mean watch me sit here in bed like you have for the past two weeks?" Arizona laughed slightly and refused to turn away from the television.
"Arizona," Callie paused after saying her name and took a good look at Arizona's profile. She had dark bags under her eyes and looked as though she aged years in a few days. The scrapes were getting better, but they were still red and angry marks all over the face of her beautiful wife, but the small smile on Arizona's lips was what annoyed her the most. That small smile that never went away and lied about how she was feeling. That dumb smile that never reached her eyes and that fooled most of the hospital, but Callie wasn't fooled. She was terrified.
"I'm fine, Calliope. Yang and Meredith are taking another look at my spine later today even though we all know that's not what's causing the paralysis in my left leg." She shrugged like she wasn't talking about the fact she couldn't feel her left leg at all. Like she hadn't had two surgeries already, one fixing internal bleeding as well as the cracked femur and a second one to correct everything in that left leg. She spoke about it like it was just another Tuesday in her life.
"Seriously, just go and get some work done. I'll be fine." Arizona nodded once with her words.
Callie was at her wits end. She ran a hand through her hair and stood up. She walked in front of the television and forced Arizona to make eye contact with her. The two stared at each other and finally Arizona's hands gripped into fists. "Just go, Calliope! I'll be fine as long as I can sit here and watch TV and learn about picking trash, okay?"
"I'm scared, Arizona. You're scaring me." Callie said, her hand reaching out and gently caressing Arizona's cheek.
Arizona scoffed and pulled away from Callie's touch. "You're scared? YOU'RE SCARED?" Arizona was screaming by now, her eyes wide and fiery, her hair unkempt and wild around her face. And suddenly, there was a calm that settled into Arizona's face as she stared past Callie, "You have no idea what kind of fear I live in every day. Like the fear that you'll forget to wear your seatbelt and crash through another windshield. The fear that our little girl will be in an accident and neither of us can get to her. Or the fear of a war that is millions of miles away claiming the life of my brother or maybe the fear that my idiot best friend couldn't get over himself to get checked out before cancer riddled his body and took his life. The fear of getting on a plane for a routine trip to work a medical miracle resulting in a fucking plane crash!"
By now tears were streaming down Arizona's cheeks, but she made no noises as though she were crying. She just stared at Callie, but she was looking through Callie, as though she weren't even there. "So don't talk to me about being scared. Or being in pain, because I'm living it. Or maybe I'm not." Arizona slapped at her left thigh, making the point that she couldn't feel anything there. "The worst though is the fear of silence. How sitting in the middle of the woods, surrounded by the smell of burnt flesh and gasoline which clings to everything there was just this stillness in the night and silence. No animals scurrying nearby or owls hooting, no, none of the chaos one would expect from a major disaster, just the silence as two of your friends die and leave you. The silence in a moonlit sky as pain completely takes you over. I can't stand it, so really, just go for now, because I'm not in the mood to placate your feelings of being scared over something you have no idea about."
Callie stood stunned staring at Arizona, who just turned back to the TV on the wall. She understood now why the TV was never turned off. Arizona was having some form of PTSD and Callie was powerless to stop it. "Okay. I'll uh… I'll come by later." She turned and left the room and immediately ran to the daycare, taking Sofia in her arms and crying while hugging her closely.
Callie was finally pulling herself together as Mark walked into the daycare. "Looks like Mommy had the same idea Daddy did today," he said with a smile as he walked up to her and pulled Sofia from her arms. "Hi there, baby!" he cooed to her and she clapped, happy to see two of her parents. "How's blondie?"
Callie froze visibly when the question was asked and turned away from him to try and hide the tears that were pooling in her eyes.
"That good, huh?" he said mostly to himself.
"She's got some sort of PTSD and I'm not sure how I can help her. She just keeps pushing me away," she sighed deeply and ran a hand through her hair.
"Well, I think all of us involved in that crash have PTSD," he shrugged and kissed his little girl on the cheek.
"No, there's just something really off with her now…" Callie said while biting her bottom lip.
"No more so than anyone else that survived that crash. Meredith spent a week in a psychiatric hospital coming to terms with the fact that her whole world went up in smoke. She got out just in time to go to the funerals of her husband and sister. Now she and Yang work around the clock. Why do you think she went back to neuro?" He smiled brightly at Sofia who smacked her little hands against his cheek. "Oh, do you think Daddy needs to shave? I haven't been home yet today."
"Is that your way of working through the PTSD? A different woman every night?" Callie scoffed.
"Sometimes three in one day or three at the same time," he grinned at Sofia who squealed and giggled.
"You're disgusting," Callie said with a shake of her head.
"But incredibly happy," he smiled.
"Just don't get sick. I don't want to have to tell our daughter and explain things…" Callie shook her head slightly and stood back up. "I've gotta get back to work."
"Don't worry, I'm careful. Your Mommy is crazy, thinking I'd do something dumb," He smiled at his little girl and rubbed her back as Callie left the room.
Callie went about her business, but she was preoccupied with thoughts of Arizona. Her wife had always been her backbone, always protecting her and providing for her and helping her when need be; Arizona had been so many things for her, and now, she only wants to be that person for her wife as well. Only, Arizona is acting like a stubborn bitch and leaving Callie in the dark while she stares into her own fear, bracing herself to take it alone. As if they were in no marriage at all. It was maddening to Callie and made her want to pull on her hair out, only she would look terrible bald, so that really wasn't an option.
The problem was she couldn't think of any options at all.
This was her life, spiraling out of control before her very eyes and she was powerless to stop it. Arizona was going to eventually explode and it would be worse than what happened between them earlier. She wanted to get her wife help, but she knew Arizona would be resistant. She was nervous even bringing up the idea of therapy, but she was at her wits end.
Well, fine… If Arizona was going to fight her through this, then she needed to be prepared. And if Arizona wasn't going to ask for help or accept it, then she'd have to get some backup for herself. Callie ran a hand through her hair as she stood in front of the door to Dr. Wyatt's office. It worked for Meredith. It worked for Owen. She needed this to work for her. And maybe, just maybe, she could convince Arizona to try and let it work for her as well.