Title: "Another Stupid Coffee Story"
Author: YouDidn'tMakeDuchovny (for those who don't get it, extract the 'n' and say it veeeeeery slooooooooooooowly.)
Rating: PG., slight violence over stupid matters
Spoilers: none
Repudiate(r) (for those of you who don't know it's like a disclaimer): none of the characters in this story are the property of me, partly because I'm the editor, but because Mulder and Scully belong to the big person to whom they belong to, Ms. Gary-Penelope-Jean belongs to the author herself, and I do believe that Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle the cow belongs to the author. And Target belongs to the Dayton Hudson Corporation or whatever. Oh yeah. The purple cow belongs to Lauren, but I think hers is really a horny purple cow??
Mulder walked down an aisle at Target and saw Scully standing at the
other end. "Hey, Scully!" he called. "What're you doing here?"
"Oh, nothing," she mumbled, trying desperately to hide the bottle of red
hair dye behind her back, but only succeeding in dropping it on the floor.
"Here, let me get that," Mulder said, staring at the bottle he had just
picked up. "I guess we can close this X-File. Dana Scully's red hair -
actually a clever government conspiracy to undermine Fox Mulder's work."
"Um, actually, it's for my Aunt Gary-Penelope-Jean, and uh, well, it
helps heal her flaring foot corns, and uh....well, what are YOU doing here?"
"Getting toenail clippers. They're getting kinda sharp and pointy."
"Yuck! Mulder, that's disgusting!"
"No, not mine! My purple cow's! Her name is
Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle. See, she usually drinks
coffee, and that stops her toenails from growing, but we ran out, so now I
have to clip 'em."
"Why don't you just buy some more coffee instead?"
"I'm trying to wean her off of it. Besides, cows don't need to drink
coffee."
Scully was outraged. "Cows have rights, too, Mulder!" she yelled. "And
poor, little Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle should have the
right to drink coffee if she so chooses!"
"Hey! She's my cow, and she'll drink what I say she drinks!"
"Cow abuser!" SLAP!
"Hair dye abuser!" SLAP!
"FBI abusers!" called a cop from behind them and put them both in
handcuffs. "You're both under arrest for assaulting.....well, each other!
Come with me."
"This is all your fault, Mulder," Scully hissed. "If you'd just made
your cow coffee, none of this would've happened!"
"Yeah, well, maybe Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle should've made her OWN coffee!"
"Cows can't make coffee, Mulder!"
"Mine can."
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
THE END!
We love feed back! And the reaally long disclaimer... don't ask. The new uploading thingy said if you had a disclaimer, you would have your account cancelled. Okay, so I don't have a disclaimer. I have a repudiate(r)! The insanity helps to add to our stories!
Author: YouDidn'tMakeDuchovny (for those who don't get it, extract the 'n' and say it veeeeeery slooooooooooooowly.)
Rating: PG., slight violence over stupid matters
Spoilers: none
Repudiate(r) (for those of you who don't know it's like a disclaimer): none of the characters in this story are the property of me, partly because I'm the editor, but because Mulder and Scully belong to the big person to whom they belong to, Ms. Gary-Penelope-Jean belongs to the author herself, and I do believe that Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle the cow belongs to the author. And Target belongs to the Dayton Hudson Corporation or whatever. Oh yeah. The purple cow belongs to Lauren, but I think hers is really a horny purple cow??
Mulder walked down an aisle at Target and saw Scully standing at the
other end. "Hey, Scully!" he called. "What're you doing here?"
"Oh, nothing," she mumbled, trying desperately to hide the bottle of red
hair dye behind her back, but only succeeding in dropping it on the floor.
"Here, let me get that," Mulder said, staring at the bottle he had just
picked up. "I guess we can close this X-File. Dana Scully's red hair -
actually a clever government conspiracy to undermine Fox Mulder's work."
"Um, actually, it's for my Aunt Gary-Penelope-Jean, and uh, well, it
helps heal her flaring foot corns, and uh....well, what are YOU doing here?"
"Getting toenail clippers. They're getting kinda sharp and pointy."
"Yuck! Mulder, that's disgusting!"
"No, not mine! My purple cow's! Her name is
Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle. See, she usually drinks
coffee, and that stops her toenails from growing, but we ran out, so now I
have to clip 'em."
"Why don't you just buy some more coffee instead?"
"I'm trying to wean her off of it. Besides, cows don't need to drink
coffee."
Scully was outraged. "Cows have rights, too, Mulder!" she yelled. "And
poor, little Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle should have the
right to drink coffee if she so chooses!"
"Hey! She's my cow, and she'll drink what I say she drinks!"
"Cow abuser!" SLAP!
"Hair dye abuser!" SLAP!
"FBI abusers!" called a cop from behind them and put them both in
handcuffs. "You're both under arrest for assaulting.....well, each other!
Come with me."
"This is all your fault, Mulder," Scully hissed. "If you'd just made
your cow coffee, none of this would've happened!"
"Yeah, well, maybe Billy-Bob-Joe-Gumbobunny-Sue-Anne-Fuzzwinkle should've made her OWN coffee!"
"Cows can't make coffee, Mulder!"
"Mine can."
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
"Can too!"
"Can not!"
THE END!
We love feed back! And the reaally long disclaimer... don't ask. The new uploading thingy said if you had a disclaimer, you would have your account cancelled. Okay, so I don't have a disclaimer. I have a repudiate(r)! The insanity helps to add to our stories!