Here's another oneshot/songfic of mine.
I've been working on this for a while but waited until Jeff had returned to post it.
The song is 'A Good Man' by Emerson Drive.
Again, I own nothing.
He stepped into the arena for the first time in two months. He followed the all-too familiar halls to where he was headed, first his bosses office. Standing outside the door, he stopped and took a deep breath. It was time to face the music. His boss probably didn't even want him back… But there was no way he could be refused return, was there?
No, he couldn't think like that. He just had to get in there and do his thing. He was loved by a lot of people… He'd hurt them, but he'd read all over the internet about the support he had, the people behind him. He was still loved. He was still respected. Barely. It didn't feel like it, no-one looked him in the eye anymore.
I don't need a whole lot of money,
But I wouldn't turn a lottery down,
I just need a little green in my pocket,
So I can buy my buddies a round,
"Jeff, come in."
Jeff stepped into the office, memories flooding back to him. Being told he'd failed the test, arguing against the suspension… All in vain though. There was nothing he could do to change those results, nothing he could do to take back what he'd done, how much he'd hurt everyone.
Jeff… Jeff was different. He didn't want fame and fortune. He just wanted the respect of his fans. He wanted to go out every week, to perform for them and to hear their reaction. He wanted to hear them yelling his name as he went for a Swanton; he wanted to feel like there was someone out there who loved him for what he did.
All I want is a place to lay my head with the woman I love lyin' in my bed,
Kind of understated,
my dreams aren't that complicated…
He'd imagined doing that all his life and now, for the second time, he was returning after a suspension. For the second time, he'd have to face the possibility of losing his job and the respect his fans had for him.
"Well, are you ready to return to the ring?"
Jeff looked down at his hands. "Are you ready to have me back?"
"Jeff," his boss continued. "We've been ready for the past sixty days. We've lost ratings and fans have held 'I love Jeff' signs every week since you've been gone. We're ready to have you back. But, only if you're ready make sure this doesn't happen again. You know what happens after your third violation."
I wanna be the one,
when all is said and done,
who lived a good life, loved a good wife,
And always helped someone in trouble,
'The third violation'. Three words that any wrestler didn't like their names to be associated with. Jeff knew all too well what happened after the third violation. That was the end of their career, no questions asked.
Jeff knew he was better than that. Failing the drug test wasn't his fault! The job he did required a lot from his body and he gave that, and more, every week.
Wrestling had taken its toll on his body though. For a time, he counted on pain killers to help him get through. That's when they'd decided to have the drug test, the time when he'd been suspended for sixty days.
"I'm ready."
On the day they lay me down,
I want everyone to gather 'round,
And say he was a father, brother, neighbour and a friend,
He was a good man!
Jeff left the office and went to what would be his penultimate stop of the night, the locker room. He hesitated as he reached the door. He knew the reactions he would get from his peers. If he turned away now, if he left, he could leave all this behind him.
Jeff shook his head. He was above that. Taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, Jeff pushed open the heavy door. Instantly, the sound of talking and laughter filled his ears. A smile reached his lips but faded again as the locker room went quiet.
He stepped in, looking at the people around him. They used to be his friends, his workmates, people who knew him, people who he looked up to, who looked up to him. He hadn't wanted that to change, he wasn't a bad person.
One mistake had changed everything.
I used to dream of being a rock star,
and seein' the world in style,
Used to dream of having' a fast car,
and driving that miracle mile,
As he walked over towards the bench, the men around him scattered, throwing comments in his direction. He held back tears.
"We trusted you."
"We thought you were above that, Jeff."
"Twice, man. How could you let yourself go like that?"
"You haven't just let us down, you've let yourself down, and you've let your fans down."
Soon the locker room was empty. Jeff sat on the bench, a tear rolling down his cheek. Whoever had said the last comment was right.
"You haven't just let us down, you've let yourself down, and you've let your fans down."
But I've heard tales those streets aren't paved in gold,
they're full of pot holes and empty souls,
who never learn…
Love is something you gotta earn,
Jeff pulled his water bottle from his bag and had a mouthful before throwing the bottle into one of the lockers lining the far wall. It made a resounding 'thud' as it hit, water splashing on the lockers and all over the floor.
He didn't pay any attention to it, letting the tears finally spill over. He'd lost his house, the respect of his workmates, the respect of thousands of fans and almost lost his job, all in the last two months.
He shook his head. He never broke down. He was strong… But respect was something he'd worked so hard for so long to earn and he'd lost it, all in one short moment.
I wanna be the one,
when all is said and done,
who lived a good life, loved a good wife,
and always helped someone in trouble,
"Hello?" There was a knock on the door.
Eyes widening, Jeff scrambled to pull a towel from his bag and wipe up the water on the floor before anyone saw it.
"Hello? Are you alright?" The voice said again. Jeff noticed that it was female, one he hadn't heard before. Well, he had been away for a whole two months, things change. People change. Jeff had changed.
He wiped the water off the floor. "Um, yeah, thanks." Picking up the bottle, he re-capped it and sat it on the bench. He quickly rubbed at the water on the locker and wall before shoving the towel back in his bag and sat down again.
On the day they lay me down,
Want everyone to gather 'round,
And say he was a father, brother, neighbour and a friend,
He was a good man!
"Can I come in?" The voice asked, sounding concerned.
"Sure."
The door swung open and a girl walked in, she was new, Jeff didn't recognise her. She was of average height, black hair hanging around her face and bright blue eyes. She smiled at Jeff as if she had no clue about what was going on.
"Are you alright?" She asked again, sitting next to Jeff and putting her arm around his shoulder. "I saw the other guys storming out, talking about you and put two and two together. How're you feeling?"
Jeff almost laughed. He'd been suspended for two months, losing what he'd worked so hard to get. "I'm fine." He managed to get some words out of his mouth, finally, after feeling like he'd swallowed starch. "I… I…" He stopped, tears spilling down over his cheeks again.
She girl pulled him in for a hug.
When I'm gone, I wanna leave a legacy,
of love and laughs and honesty behind me,
behind me…
"Shh… It's okay." The girl hugged Jeff tightly as he tried to stop himself from crying. "I'm Ana, by the way. I debuted while you were gone."
"It's nice to meet you." He smiled, the first real smile in a long time.
"Jeff, I know what happened. I know about you failing the drug test. I still respect you though. You're a good person and I know you can make it through this."
Jeff looked into her eyes and, seeing that she wasn't lying to him, began to talk. "I've done some bad things in my time, Ana. I… I need to know why you still respect me, even after that mistake."
"You've been my favourite wrestler, my idol for as long as I can remember. It was stupid, I'll admit. You shouldn't rely on pain killers like you did. But everyone makes mistakes, Jeff! You can't dwell on them forever, you have to keep moving on. He who learns nothing of the past is doomed to repeat it."
I wanna be the one,
When all is said and done,
Who lived a good life, loved a good wife,
and always helped someone in trouble,
"Ana…" Jeff was lost for words. Even after everything that had happened, he had at least one loyal supporter, one person who was willing to fight for him. "Thank you."
"Please, don't thank me. I can't help but to stand up for you. You're human, just like the rest of us, like the rest of those guys. You know, you've shown that you're more of a man than them. You came back here today, came back into this locker room and attempted to make things better for yourself."
Jeff began to speak but was cut off.
"You can make things right, I know you can. I believe in you, Jeff."
On the day they lay me down,
Want everyone to gather 'round,
And say he was a father, brother, neighbour and a friend,
He was a good man…
Jeff stood up and paced the room. If one person in the WWE still believed in him, then how many loyal fans did? He wouldn't know until he went out to the ring.
He knew he had to earn back the respect he'd lost. It'd take time, but he had to start somewhere. The other guys would be the hardest to convince, but he'd make it. One loyal fan at a time, he'd earn back all the respect he'd lost, show everyone that he'd made a mistake and that he'd paid for it.
It was his time to shine, his time to show everyone that he could come back.
I wanna be a good man,
a father, a brother, a neighbour, and a friend,
"Well, are you gonna go out there?" Ana's voice snapped him out of his thoughts. "You're scheduled to be on in about fifteen minutes."
He smiled. "I'm going to go out there and show them that Jeff Hardy is a fighter." His voice rose. "I'll show them that I'm sorry and I'll make it up to them, no matter what!"
"Well, go on! Get out there!" Laughing, Ana grabbed Jeff's hand and practically dragged him out of the room.
It was time for Jeff to earn back the respect of his fans.
I wanna be a good man!