Author's note:

I am cool.

No, not really, but I'm hoping this story will be… This is how I spend my Friday nights (in front of my laptop, furiously typing away). But whatcha gonna do?

Adrian is so OC it's not even funny (well according to him, anyway). I know his phobia's have been toned down quite dramatically, but I like it better this way.

This is my sad attempt at an actual mystery, so read & enjoy. Or, you know, not…

Disclaimer: Uh… No.

Prologue:

"Okay, so you take Monk, I'll take his prostitute looking fr-"

"SHARONA!" A woman practically yelled.

"Geez woman, I was kidding." The man rolled his eyes. "Hey, here they come." He signalled to the mismatched pair.

"Alright, you know the plan." The woman stuck out her right hand, Her short sleeved shirt showing her Swastika on her upper-arm.

"What do you think of this?" Adrian stood outside a clothes shop watching as Sharona went through the racks, holding up a grey v-neck jumper (tight & low cut of course). How she got him into a mall he'd never know.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" Adrian asked as a rhetorical question.

"I like it." A guy wearing a black singlet & jeans, bearing a swastika on his right upper-arm, commented. "I'm Chase."

"Sharona," she flirted, shaking his hand.

"That's a pretty name." The guy smiled.

Adrian rolled his eyes & looked around, purposefully ignoring the two. "Hey, Adrian!" Sharona came tottering up to him. "Can I leave you alone for an hour or two? I got a date!" She boasted.

"Sharona!" He whined.

Sharona put one hand on her hip & rolled her eyes. "Please! Just this once!" Sharona was getting very annoyed.

"He has a tattoo of-" Adrian was cut off.

"So? He asked me out, Adrian! I want to go!" Sharona rolled her eyes.

"But, we're looking for-" He was once again cut off.

"I'm going, and that's final." Sharona pursed her lips & walked off.

"Sharona!" Adrian called after her in vain.

"Hey Detective." A woman swaggered up to him, her long sleeved coat out of place in the boiling weather. "Never thought I'd see you in a mall."

"Well, my assistant thought it'd be funny to drag me to one & then leave me for the first man she spots." Adrian crossed his arms, suspicious

"Well, you've got some time to kill, so you may as well come for a walk." The woman took his arm in hers & walked with him outside.

"Where are we going? I don't think this is a good idea!" Adrian began to panic as they entered a secluded alleyway.

"Oh, we're already here." The woman smirked, stepping back as a huge but masculine man knocked him unconscious with a bat. Adrian crumpled to the ground, being lifted up & thrown into a black van.

…………………………………………………………..

Adrian groaned, lifting his head & surveying his blurry surroundings. He moved to rub his eyes, a searing pain shooting through his limbs. "Wh-where am I?" Adrian blinked, a man coming into focus. "Are you KIDDING me?" Adrian practically yelled in frustration, as the man Sharona had previously been flirting with stood in front of him.

Adrian heard a soft groan from behind him, and he found Sharona waking up. "Well have fun in here, you guys." The guy gave a deep, maniacal laugh, and slammed the heavy door shut.

Adrian put his head in his hands, groaning. "I'm sorry Adrian, this was all my fault." He was so furious that his phobias were cowering. Adrian began to shake in anger, but Sharona misconstrued this as sobbing. "Are you okay?" Sharona moved closer to him.

"Sharona, really?" Adrian took deep breaths, trying to control himself. "Look, I know you need to flirt with every man you meet, but did it not occur to you that the SWASTIKA TATTOO MIGHT MEAN HE WAS A NEO-NAZI?" He yelled.

Sharona began to sob, making her boss feel bad. "I-I didn't really look, or think-" She was cut off.

"Sharona! We are looking for a group of murderous Neo-Nazi's on this case. Now I know you feel some weird need to flirt with anything loosely categorised as male, but really? You didn't even let me speak when I tried to tell you he was one!" Sharona had begun shaking & bawling her eyes out.

Adrian stood up & tried to open the door, it being locked of course. He walked around, trying to find a way out, not even seeing a window. "Do you still have your purse, or phone, or anything?" He sighed.

"N-no." Sharona squeezed out between sobs. "We don't even have our shoes!" Adrian shut his eyes. She was not going to make him feel bad, what he had said was perfectly just. "Ad-Adrian?"

He mentally kicked himself, & went to sit down next to her. "Sharona, I'm… I'm sorry. I just…" Adrian trailed off.

"No, I deserved that." Sharona tried to hold back choked sobs. She ran a hand through her hair & leant back against the wall of the room. Adrian reluctantly leaned against the wall, his fatigue & current health-status over-powering his fear of germs. Sharona leant into him, feeling him tense up, but not caring. She needed someone there, and if her boss was the only one, so be it.

Adrian closed his eyes, inhaling Sharona's scent, and being glad that he wasn't in this alone. "Oi! Detective!" The guy threw a bag at them, & pushed a mattress into the room. "Dinner!" He slammed the door behind him. Sharona tried to stand, but fell back down onto her boss. Adrian gently leant her back against the wall & went over to the pile. He moved to pull out his handkerchief, but found that it was no longer there. Reluctantly, he picked up the mattress & moved it over to them.

"What's in the bag?" Sharona opened it & found a blanket, collection of fruit, two chickens, & 4 bottles of water. "Well he obviously doesn't want us to die." Adrian lay the blanket on the mattress, smoothing out every wrinkle, before sitting squarely in the middle. "Can you help me up?" Sharona was still curled in the same position he had originally found her. Adrian rolled his shoulders, but went over to her, gently picking her up & setting her on her feet. She clung to him as she walked over to the poor excuse for a bed, and sunk down onto one side.

"Wha-what are you doing?" Adrian picked up the bag & walked over.

"I'm going to sleep. And not on the floor!" Sharona argued.

"Oh-kay." He looked very uncomfortable. "Well, you need to eat & drink something, you're probably dehydrated." Mr Monk held the bag out to her. Sharona was ready to argue, but found that he was right. She grabbed a bottle of water & took out one of the chickens.

"Thankyou." Sharona took a long swig of the water, and nibbled at the chicken, watching as her boss, VERY reluctantly, did the same – finding some consolation in the fact that the water was Sierra springs*. "I'm going to sleep." Sharona informed Adrian while climbing under the blankets, wincing in pain.

"Where will I sleep, though?" He wrung his hands.

Sharona rolled her eyes. "You can sleep next to me, or on the floor. Whichever you choose."

Adrian cocked his head, and after some deliberation, lay next to her on the bed.

"Night Adrian." Sharona smiled.

"Goodnight Sharona." Adrian took her hand in his & squeezed it, both of them falling asleep quickly, hands still entertwined.

Author's note:

* This was set in season 1, where Adrian's favourite water was sierra springs, and not Summit Creek. I don't get it; the same people make it!

Okay fans, truth time. Was this any good? Should I put my head back in the sand? Do I deserve an award? Be honest & brutal, but please avoid any flames. Oh, and to answer your question, just take a glance at my username. *Chuckles* I hope y'all get that one, and were asking the question I thought you were…

Anyway, R&R please! I still have my spork! :).