So, anyone who knows me, knows how much I love Oz...and how much I love referencing OZ in my SN stories...with that in mind, I decided to write a sequel to So Not Following the Yellow Brick Road for the Amazons for a Christmas Present...anywho, there are four chapters to this story and I will be posting them everyday around this time...hope it makes you laugh a little...Have a Merry Christmas and happy New Year!! Bambers;)
Munchkins, Lions, and Scarecrows, Oh My!
Chapter One
Dean burst through Bobby's front door with Sam following close behind. The youngest Winchester's riotous laughter, and his brother's deep scowl immediately set Bobby to wondering what had happened, but it wasn't long before Sam clued him in on why Dean was so angry.
"He – he was Dorothy, Bobby . . . and a winged monkey," Sam managed to choke out through peels of laughter.
"I wasn't a damned winged monkey," Dean snapped, heading toward the kitchen to get himself a beer.
From the way he was staggering slightly, Bobby could tell that the middle Winchester had already been drinking quite a bit. "What's he talkin' about, Dean?" He followed and grabbed a beer for himself.
"It's nothing, Bobby," Dean said evasively as he brushed past him and strode to sit by the Christmas tree Bobby had been decorating before the brothers had arrived. "Sam's just the worst Witch hunter ever known to man."
"Ask him about the ruby slippers, Bobby," Sam piped in, and another round of laughter ensued.
"What ruby slippers?" Bobby scratched his beard in confusion. He'd been witness to many arguments between the brothers, but this was the first time he couldn't make heads or tails over what they were fighting about. "What are you two chuckleheads talkin' about?"
"He visited Ooozzzzz . . . " Sam's eyes widened with amusement as he stressed the word. "An' dad was the giant green head."
Bobby's lips twitched with humor at the thought of John as a giant green floating head. "Well, at least that much makes sense."
"Ask him about the Wicked Witch of the West," Sam further taunted as he poured himself some eggnog. "He pissed her off so bad she turned him into a winged monkey."
"I didn't piss her off. S-she just didn't like it when I asked her why she gave Dorothy an hour to live," Dean grumbled, and then downed his beer.
Feeling as if he might need something a lot stronger than just a simple beer to drink while listening to the boys fight, Bobby grabbed for his flask of whiskey and hastily took a healthy swallow. "Dean, you do realize it's just a movie, right?"
"Thass what Frank Baum wanted everyone to believe," Dean slurred, jabbing his finger down on the couch's armrest in emphasis of his point.
"Oh, he has a theory." Sam smirked, plopping down on the reclining chair. "Tell him your theory, Dean."
"Frank went to Oz . . . he was there an' wrote about everything he saw."
Sam caught Bobby's eye, and then gestured toward his head. "He hit his head," he silently mouthed. "It was really pretty there wasn't it, Dean?" he uttered in a mock placating manner. "An' I was there." He jabbed a finger into his own chest and then pointed at Bobby. "An' you were there, an' Ash . . . but not Toto." Sam paused for a moment, and scratched his head as if puzzled by something. "Weird really, I would've thought the Impala would've made a special guest appearance as Toto."
"Shut up, Sammy," Dean snapped, glaring at his brother. "An' why the hell would my Impala ever be a dog, anyway?"
"Oh, I dunno." Sam grinned mischievously. "Maybe for the same reason as why you were a winged monkey."
In a shot, Dean was off the couch, and dove headlong into Sam, knocking the recliner over backwards with a loud bang. Dean leapt onto Sam's chest, and pinned his arms to the ground. Sam bucked and squirmed, finally upending Dean, and sprang to his feet. Quickly grabbing Sam's knees, Dean pushed him backward, and the younger Winchester fell to the ground again. Both men grappled on the ground, and still fighting they slowly made their way to their feet.
Having been witness to many of the boys childhood fights, Bobby hesitated for a moment and then moved in to break up the fight. "Stop fighting you two. It's Christmas Eve." He pulled them apart, and stood between them.
"Did I mention that he made you into the Tin Man, Bobby?" Sam said, and reached around Bobby to cuff Dean across the head. "An' you had to go to a Tin Smith's Shop every time you had go to the bathroom?"
"I was what?" Bobby swung to stare incredulously at Dean, and Sam took the opportunity to cuff Dean in the head again.
"I didn't make you into anything," Dean argued, gripping hold of Sam's wrist, and yanking him forward into Bobby. "That's just what you were when I got there."
"Apparently you like to sing show tunes, too, Bobby," Sam uttered, jerking free of Dean's grasp and inadvertently pushing Bobby out of the way.
Dean dove for Sam once again, knocking Bobby further away from them. The older hunter lost his balance and toppled over backwards, cracking his head against the coffee table as he fell to the floor. As Bobby's eyes fluttered close and darkness closed in around him, he vaguely heard the boys rushing to his side, and then he was enveloped was complete silence.
XxXxXxXxXxX
Bobby blinked hard against the bright light, and lifted a hand to shield his eyes. He narrowed his eyes in confusion, hearing a strange metallic clinking noise when he touched his forehead. He pulled his hand away, and stared in disbelief at his silvery tin skin. Lifting his head, he glanced down at his clunky metal feet, and cursed under his breath. "Holy crap. I'm the damn Tin Man."
After the initial shock wore off, Bobby slowly made his his way to his feet, and pushed his oil funnel cap back up on his head. He then made his way toward the village he saw in the distance. Glistening snow covered the yellow brick road and also the shiny plastic-looking foliage. Fearful that he might rust, he carefully stepped around the snow on the brick road, and continued onward. Mushroom style houses lined the back of the village, and as he glanced upward he noticed large bird nest type homes where he knew some of the Munchkins lived. Off to the right, a gray home stood in stark contrast to all the colorful dwellings that surrounded it. And in the center of the village, three tiny men with bright orange beards and curling mustaches were shoveling the snow off the yellow brick road.
"'Scuse me." Bobby cleared his throat to garner their attention, and cursed under his breath when one of the startled Munchkins dove into an open manhole and covered the lid. "Ahh . . . ummm . . . I seem to be trapped in Oz." He groaned, scrubbing a hand across his tin jaw. "So, I guess I'm lookin' for the Emerald City . . . I need to talk to the big green head so he can tell me how the hell I'm supposed to get back home."
"Oh! No. No. No. No. You can't speak to the Great and Powerful Oz." A chubby little Munchkin took a hesitant step toward Bobby. "He's gone out to confer, converse, and otherwise hob-nob with his brother wizards."
"Well, when did he go?" Bobby tapped his foot impatiently, making a loud clanking noise on the ground.
"Oh, years and years ago . . . but we expect him back very soon."
Remembering that Sam had said John was the Wizard of Oz, Bobby grimaced. "Yeah, don't hold your breath for that to happen." Bobby scratched his head, nearly knocking off his funnel cap, and groaned as he pushed it back in place. "How about Glinda? Will her bubble be bursting around here anytime soon?"
The little man's brows furrowed into a worried frown as he bit at his lower lip. "Oh. No. No. No. No. What with the great war at hand, she's at the Emerald City advising the one who fell from the sky." He shifted and bowed slightly as he gesture toward Dorothy's home.
"Dorothy?"
"Oh, yes! The great and powerful Dorothy. Killer of the Wicked Witch of the West."
"He wouldn't by any chance have scruffy, golden brown hair and green eyes, would he?"
"You've seen Dorothy?" The Munchkin's bright blue eyes widened with excitement. "No one ever sees The Great and Powerful Ruler of Oz anymore . . . not since Great War with the Scarecrow King began."
"The Scarecrow King?" Bobby somehow managed to quirk his metal brow ever-so-slightly. "Is he really tall and likes to go by the name Sam?"
The Munchkin nodded enthusiastically. "Why yes, Great King Sam . . . the Scarecrow."
"Do you know how the war began?"
The tiny man took off his top hat and scratched his head. His eyes narrowed as he pondered the question for a moment, and then nodded again. "It had something to do with Dorothy being a winged monkey."
"Well, of course it did." Bobby heaved a heavy sigh. "Leave it to Sam and Dean to argue over something like that." He glanced toward the Yellow Brick Road for a few moments, and then looked back to the growing number of Munchkins who were slowly making their way toward him. "Is there a faster way to the Emerald City than walking all the way there?"
"Well, Toto will be along shortly, and it can take you there."
"Toto . . . the dog?" Bobby's eyes widened at the suggestion. "I'm pretty sure I can walk there faster than traveling by little dog."
Several loud gasps erupted from within the crowd of Munchkins, and many of them shuffled away from Bobby to duck back into their homes.
"You must be a very powerful wizard to be able to travel faster than the great Toto," said the tallest of the little Munchkins as he pushed his way forward to stand before Bobby, and made a sweeping bow. "As Mayor of the Munchkin City. In the county of the land of Oz, it is my honor to welcome you, oh, Great Tin Wizard."
"Ummm . . . I'm an auto mechanic." Bobby shuffled his clanking metal feet, embarrassed at all the attention his presence was garnering, and hitched a thumb toward the road. "Think I'll just start headin' that way, and find the Emerald City by myself."
"Oh, yes! Follow the Yellow Brick Road." The Mayor clapped his hands together, and all the Munchkins chimed in singing the Yellow Brick Road song.
Bobby held up a hand to stop them in the middle of the third chorus of the song. "If ya don't stop, I'm gonna have that damn song stuck in my head all the way to Oz . . . an' I really don't want Dorothy to say I like singing show tunes when I get there."
Just as Bobby was stepping onto the Yellow Brick Road, a car horn blared, and he clumsily hopped out of the way as the vehicle came to a screeching halt beside him. His eyes widened considerably when he looked over Dean's Impala, and noticed a painted sign on the driver's door. TOTO . . . Totally Otherworldly Transportation to OZ. "Oh, you've gotta be kidding me?"
The car door flung wide open, and the scrawniest lion Bobby had ever seen in his whole life leapt out of the vehicle and nearly tackled him to the ground. "Bobby!" The Lion let out an excited growl as it pawed at Bobby's arm. "Isn't this awesome? We're back . . . I wonder if Dean's still a winged monkey?"
Bobby took a closer look at the Lion, who's coat of fur appeared to be pooling around his feet, and lifted a brow. "Ash?"
"At your service." Ash smiled as he made a sweeping gesture toward the Impala. "An apparently I'm the royal chauffeur for the county of the land of Oz."
"You haven't seen Sam or Dean have you?" he asked as he made his way around the vehicle, and awkwardly folded himself into the passenger's seat. His funnel cap fell off, and clattered loudly on the brick road. Twice he tried to reach down and swipe it off the ground, but couldn't reach it.
Ash rushed around to the passenger's side, scooped it up, and tossed it onto the back seat. "Don't wanna lose that . . . never know when you're gonna need a good oil and lube job." He smirked at Bobby as he headed back to the driver's side and slipped behind the wheel. "An' to answer your question . . . no one sees the Great and Powerful Ruler of Oz. Or at least that's what they told me when I stopped in at the Emerald City on the way here." Putting the car in drive, Ash gunned the engine and they raced down the narrow yellow road.
"So, how long have you been here?" Bobby tried to shift in his seat to look at the pitiful looking Lion, but found it all but impossible to do so.
"Long enough to know what's really going on," Ash replied, slamming his paw down hard on the horn to scatter a platoon of tall gray men dressed in military coats and fur hats.
"An' what's going on?"
"This whole snow thing," he gestured toward the snow covering the whole countryside of Oz, "it's the work of a very powerful witch."
"I thought a house landed on the Wicked Witch of the East, and Dean killed the Wicked Witch of the West?"
"Ahhh . . .yes, he liquidated her." Ash chuckled. "God, I'm so good I can even fit in lines from the original movie to fit in with this whole new scenario."
"Yeah, you're amazing." Bobby rolled his eyes. "Now where's Sam?"
"Well, they say he's taken up residence in Winkie Land, but I've been doing a little poking around, and if he's there he's either in hiding or is a prisoner there."
"Winkie Land?"
"Yeah, Winkies," Ash responded as if Bobby should know what the hell Winkies were. He hitched a paw back over his shoulder, and continued, "Those butt-ugly gray soldiers we just past."
"Oh, Winkies."
"They work for the Big Kahuna . . . the head honcho . . . numero uno – "
With a wave of his hand, Bobby cut Ash off before he could go on any further. "Think I get the picture. So what kind of Witch are we dealing with?"
Ash's paws tightened around the steering wheel, as he cast a glance in Bobby's direction. "Glinda."