O.K, so this is my very first Glee fanfic. I'm usually not the angst writer type, but I felt the urge to do, well, angst. And there will probably be more, because I have an unhealthy Finchel addiction. It's about 2:00 in the morning, so I forgive for any errors caused by sleep-deprivation delirium caused mistakes. Yes, I write VERY dramatically….REVIEW, or I WILL hunt you down. Please do so, and feel welcome to request a story idea, I'm actually better at fluff and such! So love, hate, review, whatever works. Without further ado…
Rachel sighed, tired of the tears uncontrollably coursing silently down her face, yet in a strange way, she found comfort in them, as they grounded her. She played with the small silver locket on a long chain around her neck, rubbing the heart shaped silver trinket with her thumb, staring at the reflection of her deep brown eye, until a tear drop splattered on the very center, ruining the image and snapping her out of her bitter musing. It had been a year, exactly, since she'd been forced to walk the Earth without him. She missed his every little flaw and blemish, from the little scar above his eyebrow, to the tiny gap in his teeth that only had made his crooked smile more adorable and heartfelt. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly, imagining that she smelt the clean, earthy scent that was so utterly him that it made more salty tears fall from the corners of her closed eyes. She pretended that she could sense his tall, clumsy presence, the one that lit up a room. She tried her hardest to imagine that he was somewhere, anywhere, out there other than underneath cold, tightly packed dirt, just out of her reach forever. She opened her eyes in defeat as she realized it wasn't working. She saw the bright, sunny day peering in from her curtains, and heard the sounds of people playing a game in the front yard, and it made her feel ill. How could she enjoy the day, how could she enjoy any day, when her other half, her absolute everything wasn't there, and never would be? She rolled over, shifting her tear-soaked pillow as she began to remember the day it had all ended, and she had lost her all…
"Rachel?" Finn asked, taking another sip from the nearly empty wineglass."Yes, Finn?" Rachel hiccupped, slightly tipsy from the wine Finn kept pouring them. "I love you super much," he replied eagerly. "Finn, that isn't correct usage-EEP!" Finn had leaned over kissing her full on the lips. Rachel kissed back for a moment, and then replied before she would forget that she wanted him to stop, because she knew that she most definitely didn't. "Fi-Finn, you need to drive me home before my dad and daddy have an epilepsy," she scolded lightly. "Ughh, damnit….fine, babe," Finn sighed, disappointed. She was about to give him a full blown Berry lecture (albeit a buzzed one) when Finn utterly disarmed her with a heart-melting crooked grin. She simply rolled her eyes as he stood up, stumbling slightly before helping her up, as he was a gentleman and she was wearing a particularly short bridesmaid dress. "Hmm, you look hot in your tux. I think you should wear it more often," she mused, straightening his jacket as they strolled down the park sidewalk, following the streetlamp glow to find Finn's car. She blushed as he held open the car door, ever the gentleman. "Thank you, dear," Rachel murmured as he walked around the car, sliding into the driver's seat. She slipped her tiny hand into his large, comforting one as they rode in near silence, clutching each other's hands over the console. "Finn?" Rachel inquired. "Yeah, babe?" he replied, moving his thumb in a gentle figure-eight pattern against her warm palm. "I-I love you so much, and I don't want his day to end, ever. "Same here, Rach. You look so beautiful tonig-". The words were ripped from his mouth as a truck collided with the left side of the vehicle. Rachel screamed louder than she knew she was capable, shock and panic jolting like ice through her veins, sending all previous traces of bliss washing away with them. Her seatbelt harshly dug into her chest, and she felt as if she was being turned inside out. Finn's head hit the seat with a loud, sickening crack, and glass flew everywhere. The shards pelted Rachel, drawing blood, but she didn't notice, didn't care, she just wanted Finn to open his eyes and ask if she was all right. The reality of the situation hit her, crushing her even more than the physical impact of the crash had. She began to sob hysterically, frantically unbuckling her seatbelt and soaking Finn's bloodstained suit with tears. She leaned over him and tried to call his name, maybe even scold him for being so oblivious, but all that came out was a hoarse cry, and she realized that Finn was dead. Just thinking it caused her to double over, throwing up on the partially crumpled dashboard. She heard loud, wailing sirens approaching in the distance, and almost retched again. She had never felt as helpless, as hopeless as she did now. She began to hysterically whisper to Finn, harshly gripping his clammy hand, not even noticing the blood tinting her dress, running on to her feverish skin. She inhaled shakily as she eventually heard the slamming of car doors, and was suddenly surrounded by policemen, ambulances, and news teams. She pressed her lips desperately to his hand as the people closed in, beginning the end of the life she once had, the irreplaceable state of being she had been in when he had been in her life. It wasn't just love, it was something to powerful for words, something that spilt over into every ounce of Rachel Berry's self, something that had filled her with such a strong, overwhelming sense of irrevocable joy, brightening her soul under any circumstance.
Rachel closed her eyes tightly for a moment before sliding the CD into the stereo system. She smiled sadly as their Regional performance of Faithfully filled the room. A single tear coursed down her dry, aching cheeks. She toyed with the locket once again, softly singing along, the words ghosting across her dark room, exhaling slowly as if she had dared herself to do so. "And being apart ain't easy on this love affair…Two strangers learn to fall in love again… I get the joy of rediscovering you, Oh, girl, you stand by me…I'm forever yours, Faithfully"
